I Really Don’t Want To Be A Calamity

"I really don't want to be calamity ()" Find the latest chapter!

Li Changge villa.

Every time I came, Li Erpang couldn't help but want to complain about the two golden statues at the door.

This taste is beyond words.

But forget it.

People and their tastes cannot be generalized.

It's like Brother Su and Loli, some people like someone...Who would like the style of Brother Su?

Li Er's unfathomable mystery lifted a table in his mind, cautiously, avoiding everyone's sight, and sneaked into Li Changge's villa.

The two are in the same city after all.

In the "Zhang Huichun Incident," it was barely considered a comrade-in-arms who had struggled in the same gutter.

It is also a peer.

There are occasional contacts in private, but they are not familiar.

――After all, Li Changge is very busy with all kinds of work including commercials, movies, publicity, and meeting fans.

After entering the villa, Li Erpang didn’t talk nonsense. He took off his hat, mask, sunglasses, and fake beard, and spread his chubby palms forward: “What about things? What about things? "

Li Changge has a look of doubt: "I said, fat brother, what do you wrap yourself like this bird? Do you have enemies to chase?"

Li Er Hearing this, he trembled and shook his head quickly: "You don't understand, it's more terrifying than the enemy."

"Oh."

Li Changge complied and stopped talking.

In the Zhang Huichun incident, Li Erpang finally burned out his fat and lost his precious fat.

But through this month of tireless binge eating, classmate Li Erpang’s belly has once again seen its size, which is gratifying.

"Wait."

Li Erpang suddenly cast a suspicious look at Li Changge: "I will confirm one thing first... Brother Su, ah, it's Su Sister, she didn't find you before?"

Li Changge's expression is dumb, and his acting skills are so impressive: "You mean Su Xiaosu? That Su Xiaosu, who is 1.99 meters tall? She is looking for me? She is okay to look for me. What are you doing? You don’t know, there are only two kinds of people who can meet with me, Li Changge."

"?"

"Men and female fans."

"Understood."

Li Changge's honesty made Li Erpang completely relieved.

He chuckled, restrained his excitement, rubbed his palms: "What about things?"

"I really don't understand you otakus, what's so good about this stuff?"

p>

"You know what a fart, I have a limited-level figure on one wall of Lao Tzu, can you buy your villa, you believe or not?"

Li Changge shook his head, but still from the storage A card was taken out of space and crushed.

Seeing Li Changge's action, Li Erpang instantly stared wide-eyed and short of breath: "Wait a minute, you are... a prop? It was brought out from the'inside'? How could it be possible?"

Li Changge mysteriously smiled.

After crushing the card.

An exquisitely colored and curvaceous badge appeared in Li Changge's hands.

On the badge, there is a lifelike little loli, with a shame on his face, charming and charming.

Li Erpang trembling hands, feeling the floating touch on the badge, he suddenly realized: "No wonder I have never seen this persona. It turned out to be a prop from it! This workmanship is okay! That's it! Realistic, lifelike, Top Grade, Top Grade! Really Top Grade! Breathtaking."

Just now.

I don't know where Li Erpang's hand touched Alice on the badge, the badge suddenly lit up, and an illusory shadow emerged from the badge.

In a blink of an eye, in front of Li Changge and Little Fatty, a 1:1 translucent silhouette appeared out of thin air.

"Hello everyone, I am Alice, I am very happy to be friends with you!"

Li Erpang and Li Changge were dumbfounded.

Void.

Little loli Alice twists and turns three times to the left and three times to the right.

Li Changge also didn't expect, this [Alice Q Edition Commemorative Badge] still has this effect.

Real-name envy.

But after watching it for a while, Li Changge also recalled.

This is not a spirit weapon.

It's just an illusory shadow.

Alice's movements come and go only a few sets,

the lines are also very rigid, far not as realistic as his True Son mother spirit.

Thinking about it this way, Li Changge suddenly felt less envious.

Li Erpang squinted his eyes wide, and seemed to want to see the details of Alice's illusory shadow.

"This thing...perfect! I pay, ah no, this is a prop...I have a DP, how much do you want? Just say the number, don’t be too outrageous."

Ah this?

Can I change the death point?

This is a bit beyond Li Changge's expectations.

But this thing...is only ornamental value, there is no use for eggs.

Thinking of this, Li Changge silently stretched out three fingers.

He hesitated for a while before he thought of this reasonable price.

300DP, it should not be too ridiculous.

"Deal!"

Li Erpang patted his thigh.

I didn't even bother to kill the price, so I decisively issued a transaction application.

Me, Li Erpang, make money!

The transaction is complete.

Li Changge counts the money silently.

Ah no, count the death points.

Suddenly.

Li Changge was shocked.

The screaming golden special effect lit up behind.

Like the golden rain all over the sky, it is very gorgeous.

Li Erpang was instantly stinged by the golden light behind Li Changge, and could not help but yelled: "Fuck! You brat, what are you doing with special effects? I can't see my baby Ai Li. It's silk!"

Li Changge listened.

Meng, Meng Lang is here.

He quickly cleared up his emotions and squeezed the special effects of fifty cents back like shit.

Although this skill is passive, Li Changge has become more proficient. To a certain extent, if his emotions are not collapsed, he can barely manage it.

Li Erpang played with the badge over and over again, very satisfied.

This wave is not a loss.

Li Changge looked dazed.

I'm overwhelmed, and my heart is ecstatic.

Three, three, three thousand points!

Li Erpang actually traded him 3000 DP!

It turns out that profound mystery has a vertical finger, and there is such an infinite brain supplement function?

If you are in doubt, try pointing your finger up?

Wonderful!

Li Changge is happy.

The special effects of chrysanthemum blossoms appear low-key behind, the rays of light are restrained, but the flowers bloom brilliantly.

But Li Changge finally remembered the "plan".

I did not indulge in the joy of this illusory, unable to extricate myself.

"But this thing looks normal."

Li Changge showed an expression that you have never seen the world.

Li Erpang hehe smiled straight, and naturally did not follow Li Changge lower oneself to somebody's level. He just said: "you brat knows a fart."

"cough cough."

p>

Li Changge coughed slightly, pretending to be profound: "Unfortunately, I still had a big baby..."

"en? And there?"

When Li Erfao heard this, his attention moved away from the writhing Alice for a moment.

"Well, big baby."

"Really?"

Li Erpang always feels a little weird.

"Hehe, you underestimated me, Li Changge." Li Changge raised his bangs, faintly smiled: "My current background is not what you can imagine. In the inner world, I was born to death, After doing my best, I got a treasure that no one can imagine."

"Fuck? So slippery?"

Although Li Erpang is still a little unbelieving, after all, he remembers In, Li Changge is too pretentious. But the [Alice Q Edition Commemorative Badge] in his hand made Li Erpang, a senior fat house, a little itchy in his heart, something that he couldn't scratch.

"If you don't believe it, you can go and see it."

"Look?" Li Erpang was taken aback.

"The baby is too big, too awesome. I am afraid of being jealous, so I hid in the basement."

"This...isn't it?"

Li Erpang pretended to push away. After all, Li Changge said that he was an awesome baby. According to the apostle's rules, Li Erpang still meant it. Push away.

"It doesn't matter, who makes us good friends! Although that baby is good, but it's true, it doesn't suit my style."

Li Erpang didn't believe it.

But in the end he curiously followed Li Changge to the basement.

An old saying goes: Curiosity can kill a cat.

But maybe it can kill Little Fatty.

"Oh! You can do it here!"

"Oh! This bed is two meters and five meters! You have everything in the basement!"

Li Erpang looked at the layout of the basement and exclaimed from time to time.

"My sleeping posture is poor, cough cough, my sleeping posture is poor."

Li Changge quickly explained.

"Wait a minute, what about your big baby?"

Naturally, Li Erpang will not stay in that boring bed for too long.

After all, he has nothing to do with him.

"Here."

Li Changge slammed towards the corner.

In the corner, I saw a dark opaque cloth covering something.

A full two meters high.

Two meters...

Li Erpang instantly remembered Sister Su’s height of 199 meters, like a shadow, hiding the sky and covering the earth, and suddenly felt like a chrysanthemum Shrinking, his hands shivered suddenly. This has almost formed a conditioned reflex.

But thinking about it, it seems wrong.

The "big baby" under the black cloth is sharp and angular, not like a person.

Could it be......

Li Erpang stepped forward quickly.

He didn't notice that Li Changge was behind, quietly sighed in relief, hehe smiled, and stepped back.

Li Erpang is full of expectation and lifts the canvas.

In an instant.

A dark mecha more than two meters tall appeared in front of Li Erpang.

Just as he imagined, mecha has sharp edges and corners, and the spikes all over his body reveal a baleful aura that is not recognizing one's family.

On the shoulders of mecha, there are actually two huge tires.

Mecha's whole body is made of no material, and under the light, it flashes with cold rays of light.

Li Erpang was stunned in an instant: "This figure is perfect in workmanship!"

"Look at this material, this joint structure, this detail...tsk tsk tsk."

Li Erpang gently stroked mecha's painting, feeling the cold from his fingers, feeling very emotional, almost slobbering.

Such a domineering giant figure, if it is placed in a room...

Thinking about it, I’m very excited!

Perfect!

If it goes out, the otaku circle will cause an unprecedented earthquake!

Wait.

Which company made this?

What about LOGO?

What about trademarks?

Where is it?

Li Erpang circled the "huge model" a few times, leaving behind the cute Alice.

He didn't pay attention.

The lights in the basement are dimmed.

He didn't pay attention either. I don't know when it started. The basement was filled with a pleasant fragrance.

faintly discernible......

Smoke is filled......

Ah, fragrant...

Is this model spicy?

Hey.

Just when Li Erpang touched his head until he touched his head.

A sulky voice came from the model's head.

"Oh, damn, I can't help it anymore."

"Don't touch your hand. As a gentleman, I will never allow you to Do such an indecent act on his body."

"Mr. Beast, please let go of the gentleman in your hand!"

Li Erpang was dumbfounded.

Huh this?

Do you still speak?

ka ka ka.

The "model" suddenly moved.

It saw Li Erpang staying in place.

Said with a smile: "Sorry, I haven't introduced myself yet."

"My name is Nightmare, and I am an elegant gentleman."

"Excuse me, do you have any alcohol?"

"Oh, I have a story."

Such annoying robot, unheard-of.

Is the current AI deliberately made into this taste?

For Mao, he always feels that when the model in front of him moves, it always seems to be spraying alcohol?

Not right.

Li Erpang's feet are soft.

Only then did he discover that in addition to the smell of alcohol, there was another strange smell in the air.

Ah, the heartbeat speeds up.

What's the matter?

Did his heartbeat speed up because of this perfect model?

Puff, puff, puff, puff.

Is this love?

ka-cha.

The door of the washroom opened.

Su Xiaosu smiled shyly.

……

……

Upstairs.

Li Changge has several points of anxiety in his heart.

"It won't kill people, right."

Yi Lin estimated that the [Indescribable Rosemary] had taken effect, so he extended the hand, separated the void, and talked The constant dire put away.

Thinking of Nightmare’s mouthful of translation, Yi Lin was speechless.

That fire source fragment, really made a troublesome thing out.

Sitting on this mount always makes Yi Lin feel a little weird.

Don't think about it for the time being.

Yi Lin directly pressed Nightmare back.

"It shouldn't be." Yi Lin said.

But in fact, he is not very sure. If you think about it again, there is not much difference between Li Erpang and Su Xiaosu in terms of strength.

dong!

Suddenly.

The ground shook suddenly.

Li Changge was taken aback.

bang!

Below, there was a loud noise.

Li Changge was shocked again.

peng~ peng~ peng~ peng~ ――

There is constant movement.

The whole villa shook slightly, moving every time, hitting every time, and it was very exciting.

Li Changge cried his face sadly: "Are you sure?"

Yi Lin was silent.

In ten seconds.

In the basement, a tragic roar with a hint of shame was passed into the ears of the two through many obstacles.

"Brother Su! I fought with you today! Burn it! Fat!"

pa pa pa pa pa pa--

dong dong dong dong dong dong ――

The ground seems to be blasted by a pile driver.

Li Changge: "..."

Yi Lin: "..."

"Solved."

Yi Lin finally Completed the side mission.

Won the Epic Grade task reward.

If the task reward is not too tempting, but also paid in advance, Yi Lin really does not want to mix in the major event of the marriage.

But now it seems.

――Perfect.

Little Fatty leaves the order at the speed of light.

"Big brother, do you call it a solution like this?"

Even Li Changge can't help ridiculing.

He became a little worried.

Don't get me wrong, he is not worried about Little Fatty.

It's his villa.

After shaking like this again and again, he doubted whether the villa would be tossed down by them.

Of course, Li Changge was overwhelmed.

Although in the basement, the fighting between the two is terrifying.

Little Fatty couldn't even beat it, and it even gave out [Burn it! Fat! ] This last hole card.

But the apostle, who has not unlocked the lock yet, will not cause a hugely-expensive villa to collapse in place, unless the two of them are fully fired.

Yi Lin originally planned to leave Huating quietly after matching the couple Fatty and Su Xiaosu, doing good deeds without leaving a name.

Think carefully.

He was still a little bit worried. After the incident, Li Erpang's classmate didn't know what to do. In case of overexcitement and loss of control, he would beat Li Changge to death by the wrong hand. It would be a bit pitiful.

Yi Lin looked towards Li Changge silently and decided to stay and deal with the aftermath.

By the way, Yi Lin dialed a number.

"It's solved."

After the call, there was a gentle and elegant voice: "Trouble."

"No. Congratulations."

"Same joy and joy."

Li Changge was very curious: "Who do you call, boss?"

"hehe."

Yi Lin is just laughed and did not explain.

In half an hour.

dong dong dong 咚――

da da da da――

pa pa pa pa ――

The movement continues .

For half an hour without any pause, Li Changge got used to this rhythm, so he took out a card boredly, and played it over and over again in his hand.

"What reward did Su Xiaosu give you?"

Yi Lin asked casually.

"hehehehe --" Li Changge made a sulky face and made a lowly laughed hehe, that expression gave Yi Lin the urge to hammer Li Changge to death with a punch.

"Secrets, secrets, big secrets."

Li Changge originally wanted to show off his brand new equipment in front of Yi Lin, but after thinking about it, he resisted this impulse.

But he still couldn't hold it back after all, and sold a hurdle: "Boss, frankly, me, Li Changge, invincible!"

Yi Lin: "?"

p>

This kid is swollen.

Forget it.

Since Li Changge didn't want to say, Yi Lin did not reluctantly continue to ask.

The two spent another half an hour bored.

The movement below finally stopped.

Yi Lin and Li Changge looked at each other.

Li Changge: "It's over?"

Yi Lin: "Maybe it is?"

Suddenly.

A voice with three-point sorrow, three-point aggrieved, three-point anger, and one-point hidden deep comfort, once again penetrated through numerous obstacles, echoing leisurely in the villa.

"Fuck Ahhhhhhh -"

It is the voice of Li Erpang.

Yi Lin can be sure, nodded: "Well, it's over."

Ten minutes later.

The haggard fatty walked out of the basement staggeringly.

My eyes are blank.

Deep eye sockets.

After a fierce battle, Li Er was too fat and thin.

――Of course, it is actually the repercussions of skills, the fat is gone.

He took a few steps and slammed against the wall. The corner of the wall was instantly knocked out of a gap by Li Erpang.

Li Changge's mouth twitches slightly.

But Li Erpang seemed to have lost his soul. He didn't even know that he hit the wall. He changed the direction and walked towards the hall.

"Be careful, shit, my decoration is expensive."

When Li Changge saw Li Erpang bumping around, he finally couldn't help but remind him.

The muddleheaded Little Fatty finally came back to his senses.

He followed the sound source and looked towards Li Changge blankly.

The eyes are getting brighter and brighter.

Then.

"Fuck! Li Changge, you fucking fool!"

Li Erpang suddenly violent, after tossing for an hour, he didn’t know what to do. Where did he squeeze out his last strength, rushed towards Li Changge, punched and kicked him on the sofa, and smashed to death.

As early as when Li Erpang came out, Yi Lin quietly turned on [Like a Shadow Following the Body].

Although the skill effect under this broad daylight is not particularly good.

But Li Changge, this sao bag, acted like a light bulb not far away. The ailing Li Erpang didn't even see Yi Lin who was close at hand, and rushed directly to Li Changge.

"Why do I make you shameless! What do I make you conspiracy!"

"I am gone aaahhhh..."

"You I still have a shining and majestic life!"

"Why do you still have a light body and a soft and easily toppled loli dream!"

"What ruined you? Lao Tzu’s dream!"

"I want you to have no land of burial shit! Wu wu wu......"

Bang, boom, scoff, PIA, ah, oh, wu wu wu ……

Various sounds, gathered into a symphony-like chapter...

Very pleasant.

Yi Lin took a sip of tea.

It's still hot.

He knew it well.

Don't look at this Li Changge being beaten up and screaming, but the voice sounds full of breath, HP should not drop too fast.

If Li Erpang is really murderous, Li Changge, without precautions, would have lost a single face, and could not call it out at all.

This Little Fatty is angry, but for some unknown reason, his sanity has not been completely lost, and the bottom line is still there.

So Yi Lin is very calm.

Ten minutes later.

Yi Lin tea has already been drunk.

Seeing that Li Changge was busy being beaten up, Yi Lin was not ashamed to let Li Changge take a break from his busy schedule, went to make a pot again, and simply waited quietly.

Finally.

Li Erpang finished venting again.

He got up from Li Changge, and saw Calm Yi Lin drinking tea by the side, his expression stunned.

"When did you come?"

"Just now."

"Oh."

Li Erpang complied, some I'm still in the mood, hesitating whether to take a break and then beat Li Changge for another round.

Li Changge got up with bloody nose and swollen face, crying with a sad face: "Big brother, how can you watch me being beaten!"

Yi Lin seriously corrected Li The language in Changge's words: "I didn't watch you being beaten, I simply didn't watch it."

Li Changge: "..."

Li Er is fat.

Slap your mouth and taste it.

He was already too small to see the squinting of his eyes. In his thoughts, he even squeezed out the crow's feet in the corners of his eyes.

"Is it you?"

Yi Lin laughed: "Which thing do you mean?"

"Fuck!"

Li Erpang suddenly violent, the anger he had just vented rose again, ready to punch Yi Lin.

Yi Lin reminded: "Remind you, don't force me to shoot."

Li Erpang: "..."

After a while.

The three sat down again and talked.

Li Changge rubbed his face with grief, quickly placed orders from his mobile phone, and delivered the most expensive facial masks and skin care products at the fastest speed.

This face is his capital based on the world, and he must not be sloppy.

Li Erpang looked towards Yi Lin.

Complex mood.

I have a vulgar word, and I don’t know if it should be said wrong?

But thinking of Yi Lin's strength, Li Erpang decided to hold back what was in his heart, and suffocated a fart.

Li Erpang always feels that this kid is deep and unmeasurable, and his personality is insidious. No, it is very miserable that he has lost his dreams.

However, the rice is cooked, and the rice is cooked. After weighing the pros and cons, Li Erpang decided to temporarily suppress the thought of hitting Yi Lin.

He didn't beat Li Changge anyway, didn't he?

Who is not beating?

This is a good tone.

Thinking of this, after self-comforting, Little Fatty feels much better.

"What benefit did Brother Su give you? I give you double... No, can I give it three times? Is there anything I can’t discuss? Ah?! I have to use it to hurt my feelings. Means?"

Li Erpang is heartbroken. Whenever he thinks of his experience in that hour, he feels out of breath with hatred.

Yi Lin thought for a while, and said: "One said one, the benefits she gave, you really can't give double, let alone triple."

"Fuck!"

Li Erpang still doesn't understand why, Su Xiaosu has paid his blood in order to capture him.

Even an insidious person like Yi Lin decided to use this kind of detrimental trick that he did not hesitate to offend others. It is conceivable that the price given by Su Xiaosu is absolutely beyond imagination.

"It's sloppy!"

He knew this a long time ago, and he should give Yi Lin benefits in advance so that he won't help Su Xiaosu.

"Negligence!"

He should have expected that Brother Yi Su’s interpersonal relationship, thinking about the people who can find help, can count with one hand. Got to come.

"I regret it!"

As Li Erpang thought about it, he cried silently.

When Yi Lin saw Little Fatty squatting on the sofa, he felt sad, and comforted him: "Actually, it's not that pessimistic."

When Li Er Fatty heard it, his heart became even more angry: "I My dreams are gone, you still make me not pessimistic?"

In every fat house, there is a dream of sitting on loli in his heart!

The dream is gone!

Can you not be pessimistic?

An old saying goes: There is no dream, what is the difference with salted fish?

"Sister Su is not strong?"

"Strong is strong, but..."

"Does Sister Su sound bad?"

"Sounding good is good, but..."

"Sister Su has a bad personality?"

"A good personality is good, but..."

"Are you uncomfortable?"

"Comfortable is comfortable, but...fuck?" Li Erpang almost didn't respond, yelling, "It's not comfortable at all." Is the uncomfortable problem okay! Wait, I'm simply not struggling with this problem, okay?"

Is it over?"

It’s not obvious that this is a complaint about integrity. ,

Yi Lin was too lazy to break, chuckled, stood up, and walked towards the door: "For us, the plain and unpretentious love story is an unattainable luxury Pin. It’s rare to be able to stay with your partner for a long time. Cherish it."

At the end, Yi Lin thought for a moment and added: "In the future, you will thank me."

When he said this, he thought of himself.

But Li Erpang's face turned green instantly.

But it's not easy to attack.

Me? Thank you!

"No!"

When Li Erpang saw Yi Lin was about to leave, he suddenly woke up, but I was so embarrassed that I could run away!

While Su brother hasn't slowed down yet, am I stupid if I don't run away?

Hmph, you underestimate me, Li Er is fat!

Thinking of this, Li Erpang directly stepped over the sluggish Yi Lin and walked out.

Li Changge lay reclining on the sofa, rubbing his bruised face, looking at the back of Little Fatty running away embarrassedly, and said coldly: "Scum man. Scum!"

" Oh, it hurts, it hurts—"

The muscles twitched on the wound, and Li Changge twitched and wailed again.

Let’s talk about Little Fatty again.

He felt that running away at this time seemed more exciting than running away in a trial.

Li Erpang crept on his feet.

I was afraid that the movement under my feet would be too loud, penetrate the ground and spread to the basement, disturbing the terrifying creature with a height of 1.99 meters.

Five meters.

Four meters.

Three meters.

Two meters.

Li Erpang has realized it.

Run to the ends of the earth.

As long as you run fast enough, no matter how tall and strong Brother Su is, she will not be able to catch up.

"Witty!"

Li Erpang silently praised his intelligence.

Here it is!

Li Erpang was excited and suddenly opened the door of the villa.

Suddenly.

From all directions of Li Erpang, countless respectful voices gathered together, quite a feeling of coming from all directions.

"Congratulations, Young Master, Young Master, and Mrs. Young!"

"Wish Young Master and Mrs. Young be forever!"

"made in Heaven and arranged by Earth !"

"Giving birth to your son early!"

"Full of children and grandchildren!"

I don't know when.

Countless dark cars surrounded Li Changge's villa.

Hundreds of Li Family subordinates, wearing black suits, sunglasses, and standard bodyguard attire, have already surrounded Li Changge’s villa three times inside and outside three circles in order to prevent Li Erpang from escaping.

long long long rumbling--

The sound of the propeller hu hu rotating from above.

Li Erpang looked up.

I found a group of armed helicopters hovering at low altitude above my head, and even arranged a neat formation in the air, fancy patrols, and unobstructed views of the villa's all around environment.

When Li Erpang saw this scene, why didn’t he understand?

The eyes went dark, and Little Fatty passed out completely.

[Secondary Mission: Capture Little Fatty. mission completed! 】