My Imperial Advisor is ChatGPT

Once I leave Yangguan Pass to the west, I will never see any old friends again.

This line of poetry might evoke endless desolation in later generations, but for Zhang Qian, the Marquis of Bowang of the Qin Dynasty at that moment, beyond Yangguan Pass, not only were there no old friends, but even the living were almost gone. All that remained was endless yellow sand and the scorching sun that could bake a person into jerky.

This is Bailongdui, a salt flat known as the "Sea of ​​Death".

Zhang Qian rode on a camel, his lips cracked like two pieces of withered tree bark. He clutched the water sack tightly in his hand; the water was almost gone, and it rattled unsettlingly. Behind him stretched a long procession of one hundred elite Qin "special forces" soldiers. Although physically strong, they were all wilted like frostbitten eggplants in this extreme environment, and even their warhorses drooped their heads, panting heavily.

"My lord, have we taken the wrong path?" The adjutant wiped the salt from his face, his voice hoarse. "According to the map, there should be an oasis called 'Lop Nur' ahead, but we've been walking for three days and haven't seen a single camel thorn."

Zhang Qian squinted his eyes, which were red from the wind and sand, and took out the sheepskin map bestowed by Qin Shi Huang from his bosom. He then looked at the "compass" specially made by the Mohists in his hand.

The compass needle trembled slightly, yet it pointed firmly westward.

"That's right." Zhang Qian spat out a mouthful of saliva containing sand. "His Majesty said that roads are made by people walking. Every step we take now will become the national road of Great Qin in the future. Everyone, pay attention! We're about to enter the territory of Loulan. Don't let the people of the Western Regions look down on the backbone of us Qin people!"

He patted a large box carried on the camel's back. Inside was the most precious "national gift"—a special edition of Shu Yunrou toilet paper. In this wasteland where even wiping one's bottom required sand and gravel, this stuff was more valuable than gold.

Just then, a strange gust of wind suddenly rose from the ground.

The wind didn't carry sand; instead, it carried a faint sulfurous smell, similar to rotten eggs.

Zhang Qian's nose twitched twice.

He had lived in Xianyang, visited the Institute of Physics, and smelled the exhaust fumes from Zhao Gao's chemistry institute. He was all too familiar with that smell.

"Stop!" Zhang Qian roared, his voice echoing across the empty wasteland.

"Everyone! Dismount! Find cover!"

Although exhausted, the soldiers were well-trained and almost instinctively rolled off their horses and hid behind camels or supply wagons.

Just as they lay down...

"boom--!"

A sand dune less than fifty paces ahead suddenly exploded without warning.

There was no earth-shattering, destructive shockwave, nor any flying shrapnel; only a column of dark red smoke shot into the sky, accompanied by a large amount of flying sand and gravel.

"Pfft pfft pfft!"

Sand and gravel fell like raindrops, hitting everyone's helmets and leather armor with a crackling sound.

Immediately following were the second and third explosions.

"Boom! Boom!"

The explosions were scattered haphazardly, some by the roadside, others atop sand dunes. While the scale was intimidating, the actual power seemed… somewhat underwhelming.

A Qin soldier closest to the explosion was thrown off balance by the blast wave. He got up and touched himself, finding that apart from a black mark on his face, he was completely unharmed.

"What...what kind of sorcery is this?" the adjutant exclaimed, still shaken. "An earth dragon turning over?"

Zhang Qian lay on the ground, looking at the huge crater created by the explosion and the lingering smell of cheap gunpowder in the air, a glint of shrewdness flashing in his eyes.

"It's not sorcery," Zhang Qian sneered. "This is 'Heaven-Shaking Thunder.' However, it's a counterfeit."

He saw it immediately. The gunpowder wasn't burning completely, producing a lot of black smoke and little thrust. Clearly, the proportions were wrong, or the granulation process was flawed. If it were a genuine Thunderclap Bomb from the Imperial Guard, that attack would have wiped out half the caravan.

"Someone is lying in ambush on us! And this person has a formula from our Great Qin!"

Before Zhang Qian finished speaking, countless heads suddenly appeared from behind the surrounding sand dunes.

They were hundreds of veiled bandits wielding curved knives. Instead of charging, they howled like wolves, trying to overwhelm the caravan, which seemed to be already terrified.

The leader, a one-eyed man riding a tall horse, shouted in broken Qin language, "Qin people! Leave your goods! Leave your lives too!"

Zhang Qian slowly stood up and patted the sand off his body.

He looked at the bandits, then at the tense soldiers behind him, and suddenly did something that surprised everyone.

He turned around and opened the box filled with "glass beads" and "exquisite porcelain".

"Want something?" Zhang Qian grabbed a handful of crystal-clear glass beads and held them high.

Under the sunlight, those cheap industrial products shone brightly, appearing so dazzling and alluring in the desolate desert.

The bandits' eyes widened instantly. In their eyes, it was a huge gem, a fortune they could never spend in several lifetimes.

"Here you go!"

Zhang Qian suddenly waved his hand, forcefully scattering the handful of glass beads onto the sandy ground to the side of the bandits.

"Splash—"

The glass beads rolled to the ground, shimmering with a deadly allure in the sunlight.

"Rob it! The jewels!"

The bandits, who had maintained their encirclement formation, were thrown into chaos. Greed overcame discipline, and dozens of bandits jumped off their horses and rushed towards the sandy area, wrestling and fighting over a "gem".

The one-eyed leader roared in anger, whipping his men, but to no avail.

Zhang Qian watched this scene, a mocking smile curving his lips.

"Your Majesty is right. Problems that can be solved with money should not be solved with swords. If money cannot solve the problem, then the money is not enough."

He picked up another exquisite blue-and-white porcelain plate, a defective product made by Zhao Gao, but considered a divine object by the people of the Western Regions.

"Whoever kills that one-eyed man gets this plate!"

Zhang Qian roared and raised the plate high.

The bandits stopped fighting, and countless greedy eyes all turned to the one-eyed leader.

One-Eyed Dragon felt a chill run down his spine, a coldness shooting from the soles of his feet to the top of his head. He realized that these were not easy prey at all; they were a group of hunters carrying poisoned bait.

……

Xianyang Palace, the Nourishing and Warm Pavilion.

Ying Zheng was unaware of what was happening in the desert thousands of miles away; he was facing a test of "honesty."

Zhao Gao knelt before the soft couch, cold sweat dripping from his forehead onto the golden nanmu wood floor.

On his wrist was a strange copper ring, connected to a thin copper wire. At the other end of the wire was an extremely sensitive floating pointer suspended in the basin of water.

This was designed by the leader of the Mohist school based on the "principle of pulse and emotional fluctuation" provided by Xiao G—the first "lie detector" of the Qin Dynasty (although rudimentary, it relied entirely on the pulse to move the pointer).

"Zhao Gao." Ying Zheng held a clove of garlic, peeling it casually. "I heard you have a twin brother?"

The pointer in the basin jumped suddenly, creating a ripple.

Zhao Gao's heart pounded, but he dared not lie: "Your Majesty, there is indeed such a good-for-nothing named Zhao Cheng. But... he ran away from home ten years ago and his whereabouts are unknown!"

"Untraceable?" Ying Zheng tossed a peeled garlic clove into his mouth, crunching it loudly. "Then why did the Black Ice Guard find that someone saw someone who looked exactly like you at the city gate on the night the gunpowder workshop was robbed?"

The pointer shook violently again, even spinning in the water.

Zhao Gao was terrified and kowtowed desperately: "Your Majesty, please see the truth! Your Majesty, please see the truth! Since I entered the palace, I have devoted my heart and soul to Your Majesty. How could I dare to have any disloyal thoughts? That Zhao Cheng... that Zhao Cheng is a madman! He has been jealous of my intelligence since I was a child, jealous of my... uh, my good looks."

"He stole the blueprints and ran away; I truly didn't know! If I had known, I would have strangled him with my own hands!"

Ying Zheng looked at the wildly jumping pointer, then at Zhao Gao's pale face, which was filled with fear.

Little G analyzed in his mind: [His heart rate soared to 140, his pupils contracted, and his micro-expressions showed extreme fear. But he didn't seem to be lying; he really wanted to strangle his brother.]

Ying Zheng swallowed the garlic and drank a sip of warm water.

"Alright, get up."

"I doubt you have the guts. You're greedy, cowardly, and obsessed with saving face. You want me to go to the desert to eat sand and rebel? You wouldn't go even if I killed you."

Zhao Gao felt as if he had been granted a pardon, and collapsed to the ground, feeling as if he had just escaped death.

"However," Ying Zheng's tone shifted, his eyes turning deep, "your younger brother is quite capable. He stole our gunpowder formula and ran off to the Xiongnu."

"I am worried that Zhang Qian's journey to the west may encounter trouble."

"Zhao Gao, has your chemistry institute come up with any new gadgets lately? Like the kind that can transmit sound over long distances?"

Zhao Gao said with a bitter face, "Your Majesty, you are making things difficult for me. Transmitting messages over a thousand miles is a divine skill. I can only... I can only make some tobacco and firecrackers."

"Fireworks?" Ying Zheng asked thoughtfully.

He thought of the beacon tower.

The beacon towers of the Qin Dynasty used smoke signals during the day and fire signals at night. Although the information transmission speed was faster than that of horses, it was one-way and could only transmit simple messages such as "enemy activity" or "peace."

"Little G".

"Is there any way to make the beacon towers 'talk'?"

【have. Optical communications. 】

[Using different colors of light, or combinations of varying lengths of light, to represent different meanings. This is the visual version of Morse code.]

You will need: a large concave bronze mirror, colored glass plates (red, green, and yellow), and a sophisticated codebook.

Establish a chain of "light signal towers" from Xianyang directly to Yumen Pass, with one tower every thirty li (approximately 15 kilometers).

Once completed, news of its construction will reach Xianyang from Yumen Pass in just two hours.

Ying Zheng suddenly stood up.

Two hours!

This is more than ten times faster than the urgent delivery of 800 li!

"The throne has been passed to Huhai!"

……

Hu Hai was walking his dog in the Imperial Garden. His greyhound, named "Wangcai," had a shiny LED collar (actually a glass tube filled with fireflies) around its neck, which looked quite cool.

"Father! You wanted to see me?" Hu Hai ran in, leading his dog.

"Stop walking the dog." Ying Zheng pointed to the sun in the sky. "I want you to walk it until it's completely naked."

"Walking around?"

"Yes. I want you to build a tall tower every thirty li along the Great Wall."

"The tower should be fitted with the largest bronze mirrors, and lampshades made of red and green glass."

"I want you to devise a set of 'code words.' For example, three flashes of red light mean 'The Xiongnu are coming'; two flashes of green light mean 'Zhang Qian is safe.'"

Hu Hai's eyes lit up when he heard this.

"This is fun! Isn't this the 'winking game' that I used to play with the palace maids?"

"Father, leave this to me! I'll not only create a code, but I'll also compile a 'Great Qin Light Language Dictionary'! So that every soldier guarding the beacon tower will learn to speak using light!"

"Go," Ying Zheng patted his shoulder. "Remember, this is a matter of national importance. If the message is misreported, I'll hang you on top of a tower as a lantern."

……

In the Western Regions, outside the city of Loulan.

Zhao Cheng stood on a high ground, watching the dust rising in the distance, a sign of the bandits' defeat.

He held a half-eaten naan in his hand and slammed it to the ground.

"Useless! A bunch of useless trash!"

"We gave them thunderbolts and topographical maps, yet the Qin people still managed to break our plans with just a few broken glass beads?"

Behind him, Modu rode on his horse, his face so gloomy it could drip water.

"Mr. Zhao, your 'divine thunder' doesn't seem that miraculous," Maodun said coldly. "I doubt it could even kill a rabbit."

Zhao Cheng gritted his teeth: "That's because the materials are no good! The saltpeter from the Western Regions is too low in purity, and the charcoal isn't dry enough! If we were in Xianyang, with the purification equipment from the Imperial Household Department, we would have blown them to bits long ago!"

"An excuse." Maodun turned his horse around. "The Qin delegation is already charging over. That spineless King of Loulan will definitely open the city gates to welcome them."

"Let's go. Let's go further west."

"Where to?" Zhao Cheng asked.

"Ferghana." A glint of greed flashed in Maodun's eyes. "I've heard that they have the best horses there, and... Greek craftsmen who know how to smelt iron."

"Mr. Zhao, you'd better pray that you can create a real divine thunder in Dayuan. Otherwise, I'll leave you with the Qin people as... a pledge of loyalty."

After saying this, Maodun and his personal guards rode away in a cloud of dust.

Zhao Cheng looked at Maodun's retreating figure, then at the Qin banners gradually approaching in the distance, a hint of resentment flashing in his eyes.

"Ying Zheng... Zhao Gao..."

"I will not lose. Even if I have to run to the ends of the earth, I will create something that can destroy you."

He wrapped himself tightly in his black robe and disappeared into the swirling sandstorm.

……

Zhang Qian, leading his delegation, finally emerged from Bailongdui.

Although they were ambushed and lost several horses, they survived. Moreover, thanks to that glass bead they let go of, they not only dismantled the bandits but also recruited several of their guides.

The outline of Loulan City was faintly visible in the setting sun.

"My lord, we've arrived!" the adjutant shouted excitedly.

Zhang Qian looked at the pearl in the desert, straightened his clothes, and touched the imperial edict in his arms.

"Raise the banner of Great Qin!"

"Bring out all those silks and porcelains!"

"We're not here to flee; we're here to... bring warmth."

When the large banner embroidered with a black phoenix fluttered beneath the walls of Loulan, the defenders on the city walls were stunned. They had never seen such a majestic procession, nor such exquisite goods.

The King of Loulan opened the city gates with trembling hands to welcome the envoy from the East.

Meanwhile, in Xianyang, thousands of miles away.

The first "light signal tower" was erected on the top of Mount Li.

As night fell, Hu Hai personally lit the huge kerosene lamp and adjusted the angle of the bronze mirror.

"Flash...flash...flash..."

A rhythmic beam of light pierced the night sky over Guanzhong, heading westward.

Although the light could not yet reach Loulan, it heralded the arrival of a new era.

Information is about to outrun the horse's hooves.

Ying Zheng stood on the terrace of the Epang Palace, looking at the beam of light, a slight smile playing on his lips.

"Zhang Qian, I've paved the road for you, and I've lit the lamps for you."

"Now, let's see what kind of new world you can bring back to me."