Being a second wife is difficult

By the time we returned from Songhetang, the sun was already setting.

Jiang Wan walked slowly, with Qing He following half a step behind her. The two strolled along the covered walkway. After passing through the moon gate, they arrived at the entrance to their new courtyard.

She had sat in the old lady's room for most of the hour and talked a lot, and her mind was actually more at ease than when she went there.

The old lady said these exact words: "That wet nurse was chosen by Gu Shi and me personally back then."

"Back when Madam Gu was pregnant with Wan'er, there were a few important matters in the manor, and she was too busy to take care of the child. So I selected seven or eight wet nurses and maids to take care of her in advance."

"We looked at each one in turn and found that she was quiet and efficient, so we chose her."

"After Wan'er was born, she would hold and soothe her when she cried at night, and she would bend over and follow behind her step by step when she was learning to walk."

"When Madam Gu finished her business in the manor and came to hold her again, Wan'er had already recognized people. She was still closest to her wet nurse. Even after Madam Gu left, Wan'er's relationship with her wet nurse never broke off, so I didn't replace her."

The old lady paused here, picked up her teacup, took a sip, and continued, "But over the years, I've also come to realize it."

"When Madam Gu was alive, she was still somewhat cautious in her actions. After Madam Gu passed away, she gradually relaxed and started making mistakes every now and then. I thought of all the good things she had done in the past, so I turned a blind eye to it."

"I know all about the things she did after you came in."

"When you came to me about changing players, I wasn't really surprised. You did the right thing, and I should have made the same decision too."

The old lady put down her teacup, glanced at Jiang Wan, and said with a hint of seriousness, "From now on, when you do things, if you think someone should be replaced or some rules should be changed, you don't have to ask me about everything. If what you say makes sense, I'll nod."

Jiang Wan was sitting on the embroidered stool when she heard this, and she didn't rush to respond. She waited for the old lady to finish speaking before saying, "I know that you are a person who cherishes old friendships. After all, that wet nurse was favored by you and served Wan'er for so many years. When I came to tell you about this, I also weighed it carefully in my heart."

The old lady chuckled and waved her hand, "You don't need to speak well of me. When I was young, I was a person of my word. Now that I'm old, I've become soft-hearted and want to slow down and see how things go."

"But some things can't be delayed. If you do them for me, I'll feel more at ease."

"What are you saying, old lady?" Jiang Wan smiled as well. "The old lady is just kind-hearted and doesn't want to do such heartless things."

"My daughter-in-law is young, so she can be a bit firm in some things, which will help to make up for the old lady's weaknesses."

The old lady was amused by her words and pointed at her, saying, "You're quite the smooth talker. Alright, alright, stop trying to sweet-talk me and go back to your business."

Jiang Wan got up, bowed, and left. When she reached the door, the old lady called her back and added a sentence.

"Give the wet nurse some face. After all, she has taken care of Wan'er for so many years. Don't let people say that our Earl's family is mean."

Jiang Wan responded and then left Songhe Hall.

Qinghe listened to the whole story, and when she saw her come out, she smiled and said, "Madam, the old lady is in a good mood today. She had a smile on her face the whole time she was talking."

Jiang Wan didn't stop walking: "The old lady had actually wanted to make a move for a long time, but she just lacked an excuse. When I talked to her, I gave her that excuse, and she naturally relented."

Qinghe nodded and followed her around the corner of the covered walkway, entering the main courtyard.

Jiang Wan stopped under the eaves, not in a hurry to go inside, and turned to Qinghe and said, "Go and call the wet nurse. Tell her it's the old lady's wish, to have her pack her things and leave the mansion first thing tomorrow morning."

Qinghe responded and turned to leave.

When the wet nurse arrived, her face was ashen, as if she already knew what was going to happen. She didn't dare look up at Jiang Wan after entering, and stood in the center of the room for a long while before speaking in a low voice, "Madam, this servant knows she was wrong."

Jiang Wan sat at the table, neither making her kneel nor making her stand for too long. When she spoke, her tone was not harsh, but she pronounced each word clearly.

"The old lady is sentimental. She said that you have served Wan'er for so many years and she doesn't want you to leave in a bad way. Go back and pack your things today and leave first thing tomorrow morning."

"The old lady means to settle your wages for this month, plus an extra sum as a token of our friendship over the years."

She paused, glanced at the wet nurse, and said, "You should understand that this is already the greatest dignity the old lady can show."

The wet nurse's lips moved as if she wanted to say something, but she swallowed it back. She stood there for a while, and finally whispered, "This servant understands. Thank you, Madam. Thank you, Old Madam."

Jiang Wan didn't say anything more and waved her hand. The wet nurse bowed and retreated. When she reached the door, she paused for a moment, as if she wanted to turn back, but ultimately did not.

After the wet nurse left, Jiang Wan sat at the table and drank a cup of tea. Qing He came in from outside and said that the wet nurse was tidying up her things in her room. She didn't make a fuss or complain to anyone. She was just quietly folding clothes and packing her bundles.

Jiang Wan put down her teacup: "She knows perfectly well that making a scene would only make things worse."

"She has served Miss for so many years, and she still cherishes the old feelings in her heart. If it really comes to that, she will not disregard Miss's dignity."

Qinghe stood by and waited for a while, then asked, "Madam, what should we do about the eldest young lady?"

"Let's talk about it when she wakes up."

Jiang Wan said, "You should first arrange things around the young lady. She's grown up now, and she can't just have one wet nurse and one maid. We need to add a few more maids to serve her, preferably those of similar age."

"Have Wang Mama compile a list of the maids in the manor who have reached the required age, and send over a few honest ones so I can review them personally."

"Find an older, more mature nanny to take care of her personally. Although she no longer needs to breastfeed, she still needs an elder to watch over her."

Qinghe noted everything down, responded, and went out to make the arrangements.

The main courtyard quieted down, and the wind under the eaves rustled through the osmanthus trees, creating a soft, rustling sound that quickly dissipated.

Lu Wan woke up as evening approached.

When she came out of the inner room, her hair was a little messy from sleeping, her hair tie was askew, and there were still red marks on her face from just waking up. She rubbed her eyes and stood at the door for a while, then saw Jiang Wan sitting at the table, so she went over and stood next to her in the chair.

"Mother."

Jiang Wan put down the booklet in her hand, turned her head to look at her, and said, "Awake? Are you hungry? Qinghe asked the kitchen to leave some porridge. Go and have a bowl."

Lu Wan shook her head, resting her hands on the armrests of the chair. After a while, she spoke, "Mother, is the wet nurse leaving?"

Jiang Wan did not avoid the question and nodded directly: "Yes, I'll leave first thing tomorrow morning."

Lu Wan lowered her head, her fingers lightly fidgeting on the armrest before releasing them. She didn't press for a reason, but simply stood there quietly for a while, as if processing the news. After a long while, she whispered, "Mother, I want to talk to her."

Jiang Wan looked at her and said, "Go ahead."

Lu Wan turned and walked out, her steps slow and deliberate, as if she were also thinking about how to start the conversation.

An oil lamp was lit in the wet nurse's room. The door wasn't closed properly, and when Lu Wan pushed it open, the wet nurse was facing away from the door, putting a folded garment into a bundle. Hearing the noise, she turned around, saw Lu Wan, and stopped what she was doing.

"Young Miss".

Lu Wan walked in and stopped at the table. She looked at the wet nurse's bundle, which was already half full, for a while before speaking, "Wet nurse, are you leaving?"

The wet nurse put down the clothes in her hands, squatted down to look Lu Wan in the eye, and looked at Lu Wan's face as if she wanted to smile but didn't. In the end, she only said one sentence.

"Yes, Miss, I'm going back to my hometown."

She paused, then softened her voice, "I'm getting old, and my hands and feet aren't as nimble as they used to be. I'm becoming less and less of a help in the household affairs."

"I still have grandchildren to take care of back home, and all the children are looking forward to my return. In my entire life, I have served only Miss for the longest time, and I have hardly taken care of my own children. Now that I think about it, I should go back and spend time with them."

Lu Wan didn't reply. She looked down at the tips of her shoes and remained silent for a while before raising her head, reaching out to hug the wet nurse's neck, burying her face in the crook of her shoulder, and muttering something in a low voice.

"Nanny, thank you for all these years..."

She paused, as if some words were swirling in her throat, and finally said only, "I know the wet nurse has to go, I know all of that."

The wet nurse's throat moved slightly. She reached out and gently patted Lu Wan's back, then stroked her hair. After a while, she let go, took a half step back, looked at Lu Wan's face, and spoke with a hint of reluctance.

"Young Miss is all grown up now. With Madam taking care of her, I feel at ease. I have seen how well Madam treats Young Miss. From now on, Young Miss... please listen to Madam."

Lu Wan nodded, her eyes a little red, but she didn't cry. She stood there for a while, as if she wanted to say something, but in the end she only said softly, "Nanny, take care on your journey. Send me a message when you get back to your hometown."

After saying that, she turned and walked towards the door. When she reached the threshold, she stopped, did not turn around, said "Take care, wet nurse," and then stepped over the threshold and walked away quickly.

The wet nurse squatted there, watching the small figure disappear at the end of the courtyard, before slowly standing up after a long while.

When Lu Wan returned, Jiang Wan had already had a bowl of hot porridge placed in the main hall. She sat at the table, not asking what Lu Wan and the wet nurse had talked about, but simply pushing the bowl of porridge towards her: "Drink it while it's hot, and rest a bit after you finish."

Lu Wan sat down at the table, picked up the bowl of porridge, and took a sip. She drank very slowly, as if counting each spoonful. When she was halfway through, she stopped, put the bowl on the table, and said, "Mother, I don't miss my wet nurse."

She paused for a moment after speaking, as if confirming something with herself, before continuing, "I hated her too."

Her voice was flat as she said this, not like she was complaining, but rather like she was confirming something she had thought about for a long time.

"I remember all those snacks and all that neglect. But when she left, she knelt down to talk to me, and I noticed that her hair had turned a lot whiter. She didn't have so many white hairs when she used to braid my hair."

"At that moment, I suddenly realized that I didn't seem to hate her."

She paused for a moment, her voice lower than before: "Watching her pack her bags, I felt a mix of reluctance and something else... a sense of emptiness, and a feeling I couldn't quite put my finger on."

Jiang Wan reached out and straightened the crooked hair tie on Lu Wan's shoulder. When she withdrew her hand, she touched Lu Wan's fingers, and the fingertips were warm.

"It's not that I'm reluctant to part with it, it's just that I'm used to it," Jiang Wan said.

"If someone has been by your side for so many years and then suddenly leaves, even if you know they didn't do well, there will still be an empty space in your heart. When people spend a lot of time together, they will always leave some traces."

Lu Wan looked up at her, as if slowly savoring the words. After a while, she nodded, her tone more composed than before.

"I see. I know then that the wet nurse was definitely going to leave this time. She wasn't a good enough person and should have left anyway. I know that my mother stood up for me, and I'm grateful for that."

She lowered her head as she spoke, as if slowly untangling the knot in her heart, and her voice softened, "Mother... just don't think I'm being unreasonable."

Jiang Wan reached out and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, her tone even softer than before: "Who said you're immature? You understand things better than many adults I've met."

Lu Wan didn't reply, looking down at her fingers resting on the edge of the table, as if unsure whether to believe what she said. Jiang Wan didn't press her for a response either, but simply pushed the soup bowl towards her, "Drink the rest, it won't taste good when it's cold."

Lu Wan lowered her head and picked up the bowl of porridge again. This time she drank it faster. After finishing the porridge, she yawned. Jiang Wan asked Qing He to take her back to the inner room to tidy up. She walked to the door and looked back at Jiang Wan. The corner of her mouth curved slightly before she turned and went in.

She paused at the door, without turning around, and said in a low voice, "Mother, don't be sad for me."

Upon hearing this, Jiang Wan responded softly, her lips curving into a slight smile.

When Qinghe came out of the inner room, Jiang Wan was sitting under the lamp flipping through a list. She spread the list out on the table and circled several names with a vermilion pen.

"What are you looking at, madam?"

"The list sent by Aunt Wang."

Jiang Wan didn't even look up. "There are seven or eight maids in the manor who are about the same age as Wan'er. We picked a few who look honest and will let Wan'er take a look at them herself when she wakes up."

"She chose it herself, and it suited her better than anything someone else had chosen for her."

Qinghe leaned over for a look and nodded: "I recognize these servants; they are indeed more dutiful than the others."

Jiang Wan folded the list and placed it on the table. Then she took a pen and added a line to another piece of paper next to it: "Looking for an older nanny who is steady, quiet, and has a good sense of propriety."

She put down her pen and was about to stand up to pour herself a glass of water when she heard footsteps at the courtyard gate.

Then Qiu Tang's voice came from the corridor: "Madam, Aunt Zhou and Brother Hui have arrived."