I set you up on a blind date, and you've managed to overcome all the weirdness?

Looking at the prosthetic limb that was parked in front of him.

The look of terror on Lin Yan's face vanished instantly.

She seamlessly switched to a harmless, fawning smile.

They've been exposed?

Don't panic.

As long as I'm not embarrassed, it's others who are embarrassed.

He reached out and grabbed Lao Zhao's prosthetic leg, using it to stand up, and patted the dust off his buttocks.

"Oh, it's Captain Zhao, right?"

"Look at what you're saying. I'm just a law-abiding, poor working man. I just finished overtime and was about to go home. How could I dare to put on an act in front of a police officer?"

As he spoke, he took out the black sponge cover and presented it with both hands.

"Is this what you mean?"

"I saw it lying on the ground just now, and I thought no one wanted it. I was thinking of picking it up, washing it, and using it as a filter."

"Since this is public property, please keep it safe."

The main point is to be flexible and resilient, and to have a proper attitude.

Old Zhao raised an eyebrow.

The kid's shamelessness was a bit beyond his expectations.

Su Qinghan stepped forward and opened a tablet-like device from the middle.

Take out a small silver tweezer, carefully pick up the sponge sleeve and put it in, then close the instrument again.

"Fragment of the rule has been contained. Danger level: Low."

"According to the database, Lin Yan is a 22-year-old male."

"The target's heart rate has now stabilized. Based on psychological analysis, at least 70% of what he just said was nonsense."

Lin Yan's lips twitched.

This woman is clearly quite pretty, so why is she so gossipy?

Old Zhao exhaled a smoke ring and waved his hand.

"Alright, Qinghan, don't scare him anymore."

He held the pipe in his hand and turned his head to look at Lin Yan.

"Do you think you've encountered a ghost? Or have you stumbled upon an urban legend from the internet?"

Lin Yan didn't say anything, but obediently shrank his neck.

"Bullshit! This is just a bunch of garbage fed with traffic."

Old Zhao, with a cigarette dangling from his lips, made no attempt to hide his disgust.

"Have you seen those street challenges on your phone? They ask you what song you're listening to, or whether you should kiss me or hit me..."

"After filming, we just upload it online, get the clicks, and run. It's just for fun anyway."

"But there's a group of lunatics in the shadows who think this thing can really create gods."

"They specifically target these tired memes, flocking to wherever they're trending, spamming the comments section and the live chat."

Old Zhao snorted coldly, his fingers cracking as he clenched them.

"By exploiting netizens' fears and generating traffic, they have forcibly fed this cyber garbage into the kind of monster that can kill people."

At this point, Old Zhao pointed to the empty streets around him.

"If it weren't for your sheer luck today, you wouldn't have managed to subdue it..."

"Tomorrow morning, sanitation workers will most likely sweep up several sacks of scraps of meat here."

Old Zhao took out a black business card from inside his trench coat and stuffed it into Lin Yan's breast pocket.

"Our bureau is specifically designed to clean up the messes of these lunatics."

"A government office with no real power or influence."

"I see you stay calm under pressure, and you're ruthless enough to do dirty work."

"Would you be interested in registering your name with our department?"

Old Zhao grinned and said with concern:

"No need to work regular hours or clock in; we provide intelligence support and some containment equipment."

"There are rewards for solving any bizarre problems, with a starting monthly salary of 30,000 and no upper limit."

"Even if you unfortunately die in the line of duty, the bureau will compensate your family with three million yuan in resettlement allowance."

"How is it?"

Lin Yan was genuinely tempted when he heard about the base salary of 30,000, but the moment he heard the words "settlement allowance," he immediately sobered up.

What a joke.

No matter how much money you have, you need to be alive to spend it.

With my small arms and legs, what if I run into someone the ladies in the group can't handle? Wouldn't I just be eliminated instantly?

"Team Leader Zhao, thank you for your kindness."

Lin Yan frowned and gave a bitter smile, seemingly genuinely disappointed.

"But I'm just a weakling. I was lucky just now. My ancestors happened to pass down a specially made Buddhist scripture that was just right to subdue that monster."

"If I really had to go to the front lines to fight to the death, I'm afraid I wouldn't survive a single episode."

"You should probably look for someone else..."

hum!hum!hum!

Before he could finish speaking, his phone in his pocket started vibrating repeatedly.

Lin Yan had a bad feeling and secretly used his mind to summon the blind date group panel.

The matchmaking group is in an uproar.

【Cyber ​​Vengeful Spirit Chu Chu】: @Lin Yan, brother~ I smelled it! Brother just earned 100 affinity points~

【Cyber ​​Ghost Chu Chu】: Brother, now that you have money, why aren't you sending red envelopes? Don't you love Chu Chu anymore?

【Cyber ​​Ghost Chu Chu】: If you don't send me a red envelope within three minutes, Chu Chu will crawl out of your shower tonight and wash your hair for you~ (smile.jpg)

Immediately afterwards:

【Mermaid in the Sewer】: @LinYanNewcomer, know the rules, everyone gets a share.

【Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya】: @LinYanFeedsBoy, I just saw a nice antique pair of scissors. Hand over the money, or I'll come to your bedside tonight and do your nails.

A string of mentions made Lin Yan's back instantly soaked with cold sweat.

Grass.

He suddenly realized something very crucial.

The "affinity value" is the only hard currency in this matchmaking group.

These female ghosts are extremely pragmatic. If you don't send them red envelopes as a sign of respect, they'll turn on you and kill you in no time.

How do you get affinity points?

We must confront and resolve the bizarre events in reality.

In other words, if he doesn't take on official cases to grind monsters, even if he doesn't die from real-life monsters, he'll be drained dry by his online dating partners.

"You should probably look for someone else..."

Lin Yan swallowed the word "Ming".

Lin Yan straightened his back instantly.

The humble, bitter smile on his face vanished, replaced by a righteous and resolute expression.

He pressed his hand to the business card on his chest and looked sincerely at Old Zhao.

"Team Leader Zhao! Defending Jiangcheng is our inescapable duty!"

"I'll take this temporary outsourced job!"

"Wherever there's the bizarre, there you'll find Lin Yan!"

Old Zhao was stunned for a moment.

Su Qinghan added insult to injury from the side:

"He was clearly showing signs of fear just now, and his current behavior is clearly theatrical."

"It is recommended that Captain Zhao conduct a mandatory mental evaluation on him."

"Shut up!"

Lin Yan mentally ranted and raved.

Old Zhao laughed heartily, raised his hand and patted Lin Yan's shoulder with such force that he almost broke his bones.

"Good lad, you know when to back down."

"Keep your phone accessible these next few days. I'll contact you if there's any work."

"Let's go, Qinghan, let's regroup."

Old Zhao and Su Qinghan disappeared around the street corner.

……

Half an hour later.

A single room in an urban village.

Lin Yan took a shower, wrapped himself in a towel, sat on the edge of the bed, and opened the [Non-human High-Quality Blind Date Group].

He was still being tagged in the group chat like he was being pressured to leave.

Chu Chu, in particular, has already posted dozens of bloody bathroom photos.

Lin Yan had a headache. He remembered the story of being chased and beaten by more than a dozen female and upperclassmen in college.

It seems we have no choice but to use our ultimate move.

The first principle of the master of balance is to ensure that sunshine is shared and rain is applied equally to everyone.

Lin Yan's fingers flew across the screen as he divided 50 of the 100 points of affinity he had just earned into a lucky draw red envelope.

send.

You sent a "connection value" red envelope.

[The red envelopes were all claimed in 0.001 seconds!]

【Cyber ​​Wraith - Chu Chu】Snatched 3 points.

[The Mermaid in the Sewer] managed to grab 7 points.

[The senior in red] managed to snag a spot at 8 o'clock.

……

[Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya] Scored 25 points! She's the luckiest!

The group chat went silent instantly.

Hmph, a bunch of vampires!

Suddenly, a red dot lit up in the corner, and Lin Yan clicked on it to take a look.

【Cyber ​​Ghost Chu Chu】: Hehe. My brother is biased; he gave the lion's share to that old woman with the scissors. Chu Chu is angry; Chu Chu is going to cut her brother's internet cable. (Feeling wronged.jpg)

Looking at the meme with blood droplets, Lin Yan was at her wit's end.

Chu Chu... I vaguely remember her; she was the first one to ask for a red envelope.

Although he didn't know exactly what this "Chu Chu" called the Cyber ​​Wraith was, he knew all too well how to deal with women with such an intense possessiveness.

Of his ex-girlfriends, there were at least 50, if not 100, of this type.

Lin Yan's core secret to dealing with this type of situation can be summed up in four words: create privileges.

Lin Yan was prepared and immediately typed a reply.

[Lin Yan]: Chu Chu, that's just a lucky draw red envelope. You're different from them.

[Lin Yan]: They can only grab these cold, hard numbers, but I only use the last bit of battery left on my phone to reply to your messages.

After sending those two sentences, Lin Yan immediately followed up with another big pie.

[Lin Yan]: Once I've earned more affinity points tomorrow, I'll immediately buy the latest top-of-the-line large-screen phone. I'll move you to the front of the screen so you'll have more space, okay?

After sending the message, Lin Yan held his breath and stared intently at the screen.

The panel remained silent for a full two minutes, and Lin Yan almost thought that Chu Chu had disconnected.

【Cyber ​​Wraith Chu Chu】: Hmph! Brother only knows how to use sweet talk! (Cat blushing.jpg)

[Cyber ​​Ghost Chu Chu]: It's a deal, right? I want to live in the highest-grade RAM! Go to sleep, brother, goodnight~

Seeing that no more gory photos were finally being sent to the screen, Lin Yan breathed a long sigh of relief.

It's stable now.

Even a cyber vengeful spirit can't withstand this scumbag's combo attack that's brimming with emotional value.

Just as one wave subsided, another arose, and a new message popped up in the private chat interface.

She is the Queen of Luck [Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya].

【Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya】: Hey, you're smart enough to buy that pair of scissors.

【Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya】: I'll give you a chance since you're so sensible.

【Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya】: Recently, that director named Li Xiang has created a lot of disgusting and bizarre works, and has taken over my territory.

【Slit-Mouthed Woman - Saya】: Come with me tonight to eat at the most expensive Japanese restaurant in Jiangcheng. If it suits my taste... if you ever run into trouble in the future, I can help you cut them all in half.

【Ding! 】

[The group guest "Slit-Mouthed Woman Saya" has reached the required level of affection for you (currently: +10).]

[Trigger advanced feature: Offline meet-up!]

Should you accept the date invitation from the Slit-Mouthed Woman?

[Note 1: Upon accepting, you will gain the privilege of summoning her to battle once (physical exorcism only).]

[Note 2: You must arrange another date that satisfies her after the date. If the date fails, or if you dare to look at other women during the date...]

She will personally use scissors to help you achieve physical castration.

[Note 3: Note 2 was left by the Slit-Mouthed Woman and is unrelated to the system.]

Lin Yan looked at the system notification and then glanced at his remaining 50 points of affinity points.

Going to eat Japanese food with the Slit-Mouthed Woman?

Lin Yan suddenly thought of something and became very curious.

Does she slurp when she eats ramen?

Will the soup leak out if I slurp it?

In order to survive in this bizarre world.

Also, to find out if the Slit-Mouthed Woman would slurp when eating ramen.

Lin Yan chose to accept.