Love Apartment: Yifei is my junior aunt

Chapter 747 Apartment Oddities Showcase

"Why do you always ask such pointless questions?"

In response to Zeng Xiaoxian's question, Yifei simply rolled her eyes at him and said, "It's a workday today, everyone has their own things to do, and Ziqiao has disappeared again."

"Right now, it's just the two of us in the apartment who's free during the day. We're not in charge of the interviews, so are we supposed to let the braised pork knuckle handle it?"

Xiaoxian yawned upon hearing this: "Of course you're bored since you're on summer vacation, but I have to do a live stream tonight."

"Stop whining!"

She angrily retorted, "If you hadn't fooled Youyou so badly, would she have been caught in such a dilemma and ultimately decided to rent a room to a couple?"

"Let me tell you, Zeng Xiaoxian, others may be able to stay out of this, but you absolutely cannot escape it!"

"You can't blame me for this."

Xiao Xian's eyelids twitched, and he chuckled dryly, "I originally just wanted to help Youyou analyze the pros and cons, but as I analyzed it... I got myself caught up in it."

Yifei crossed one arm over her chest and patted Zeng Xiaoxian's head with the other in an annoyed tone.

"What annoys me most is your indecisive and hesitant thinking. Do you think real-life choices are like exams, where everything has a standard correct answer?"

"I'm too lazy to waste my breath on you."

She handed the documents to Zeng Xiaoxian: "These are the information of the couples we'll be interviewing later. Take a look quickly, the first couple will be here soon."

"Such a thick stack?!"

Xiaoxian was startled: "Aren't all the couples moving into our apartment supposed to be highly sought-after, rare commodities? Where did you get so many couples, and you even have to interview them?"

"Well..."

Yifei's arrogant expression faltered slightly. She snorted and said with a lack of confidence, "I have my own clever plan, and of course I have my own way."

"You, you, you... you should just focus on the interview!"

Zeng Xiaoxian nodded suspiciously. He flipped through the couple's information in his hand, and after just one glance, his eyebrows instantly stood up.

[In her inner world, Yifei looked down helplessly at the stack of documents in her hands.]

She sighed, "Of course, normal couples in the apartment are in high demand. I've been busy for days, and not a single young couple has even bothered to come upstairs to look at the room."

At the same time, Nanfeng, arms crossed, strolled over and muttered a complaint.

[It's all because we've made bigger and bigger waves in the last two years, and our reputation in the apartment complex has grown stronger and stronger.]

He counted on his fingers: "For example, the violent, deadly female demon; the self-proclaimed famous scumbag; the extremely stingy bastard; the ultimate scumbag; the gossipy king of chatter; and the Japanese pervert who threatens to commit seppuku whenever he gets angry..."

Nanfeng shrugged helplessly: "Anyway, our infamous reputation on the sixth floor of Building 3 has long been known throughout the apartment complex."

[A nickname given by locals—a gathering place for oddballs!]

Even if other young couples don't know us, just hearing the name of our suites makes their skin crawl, let alone deciding to check in.

Yifei, seemingly out of nowhere, grabbed a spiked club thicker than her thigh and said to Nanfeng with a smile.

Thank you for your explanation, but you don't need to go into such detail next time.

【because……】

[That's so embarrassing!!!]

As she spoke, she swung her bat with all her might, sending Nanfeng flying like a shooting star in the sky.

【ah!!!】

The mournful howl of the south wind echoed in my heart, its lingering sound reverberating for three days.

【call……】

Yifei loosened her grip on the spiked club, squatted down, and picked up the stack of couple's information again.

Where were we?

Oh... I've been busy for days, and not even a single young couple has been willing to come upstairs to look at the room.

However, there's always a way. Normal couples in the apartment are in high demand, but there's also a group of "slightly" not-so-normal couples.

I obtained their relevant information from the residents' committee and scheduled an interview time.

Even though they all have various "minor" flaws, making it difficult for anyone to want to share an apartment with them.

【but!】

[Yifei, hands on her hips, confidently declared: "Given our group's tolerance, it's entirely possible to find a suitable couple to share an apartment with."]

She held her head high, paused for several seconds, then hunched over and said dejectedly.

Let's hope so.

……

Even though Yifei and Xiaoxian had already reviewed the materials in advance, they were mentally prepared for the upcoming interview.

However, the residents' committee's information was just a bunch of text without photos, and when they saw the first couple who came for the interview, they were still shocked.

Zeng Xiaoxian looked at the couple in front of him with their brightly colored hair and extremely garish appearance, and his mouth twitched wildly.

This boy named Saudi Arabia is shirtless... well, actually, he's not exactly shirtless.

With a green dragon on the left, a white tiger on the right, an old ox at the waist, a dragon head on the chest, and Guan Yu tattooed on the back with open eyes, he looks like a tough guy.

The girl opposite them, named Zhu Liu, had a smoky makeup look, and her face was covered with piercings—lip piercings, earrings, nose piercings, eyebrow piercings, and tongue piercings—making it impossible for Yi Fei and Xiao Xian to see her face clearly.

There was no way to tell; the nails on her face were all sparkling in the sunlight, making it impossible to see her face clearly.

As a teacher, Yifei was so angry at seeing this situation that she almost fainted.

"Zeng Xiaoxian".

She lowered her head and slapped Zeng Xiaoxian's shoulder hard.

Yifei gritted her teeth and growled in a voice only the two of them could hear, "You, you're in charge of the next round of interviews."

"I'm afraid that if I were to take charge, the situation would get quite out of control."

Zeng Xiaoxian stared in astonishment.

No, is there any need for an interview at all?

Don't be fooled by the fact that the information says they're only eighteen years old. Judging by their clothes and appearance, if Zi Qiao, who's been around the block, came along, he'd probably have to bow and say, "Happy New Year, elder brother and sister-in-law. You're my master, and I'm your son."

If they move in, the sixth floor will truly become a gathering place for oddballs.

Don't look at me like that.

Yifei's forehead veins throbbed: "Just go through the formalities briefly, and then ask them to leave."

"oh."

Zeng Xiaoxian suddenly realized what was going on. He took a deep breath, turned to the couple, and grinned sheepishly, "Sha Te and Zhu Liu... right?"

"No mistake (that's right)."

Saudi Arabia gazed at the sky with a melancholy expression at a 45-degree angle, and uttered a sentence in Martian language.

If Zeng Xiaoxian weren't a post-80s generation, he really wouldn't know what this guy was talking about.

"Hehehehe..."

Zeng Xiaoxian chuckled dryly, "You two really have good names."

Saudi Arabia, Zhu Liu.

This name sounds exactly like "Ma Fei" (meaning "flying" or "carrying").

They should clearly be called "Shamate" and "Non-mainstream"!

"Matt... Pshaw!"

Xiao Xian, who had mispronounced the name, patted his mouth and said, "Arabic... ptooey, ptooey, ptooey!"

He chuckled and skipped the part about calling out names: "Looking at your files, you two seem to have just come of age, right?"

"Um."

If you ignore her appearance and just listen to her voice, Zhu Liu seems like a quiet and gentle girl.

She grasped Matt's hands, her face filled with melancholy, and said, "The older I get, the lonelier I become; the older I get, the more anxious I feel."

Matt replied affectionately, "I will be your last harbor."

As they spoke, they gazed deeply into each other's eyes, pouting as they prepared to kiss.

"mua~~~"

"stop!"

Zeng Xiaoxian's smile was stiff. He never expected that there would be post-90s who were devout believers in the "Shamate" and "non-mainstream" styles in this era.

He raised an eyebrow: "We're still in a two-way interview process, shouldn't we... get a little more formal?"

"oh."

"I have a question I'd like to ask you both, um..."

Xiao Xian thought for a while, then tentatively asked, "Do you prefer sweet or savory tofu pudding?"

The two exchanged a glance and then each gave their answer.

"Sweet."

"Salty."

"I'm very sorry, we may not be a good match."

Xiao Xian's lips twitched with laughter as he casually remarked, "After all, we hate eating tofu pudding the most."

"ah?!!"

Before the two punks and non-mainstream individuals could say anything more, Xiaoxian and Yifei had already reached out towards the door with regretful expressions, asking them to leave.

After they left, Xiaoxian and Yifei slammed the door shut and leaned against it, letting out a long sigh of relief.

"call……"

Yifei patted her chest, her eyes rolling upwards until only the whites were visible: "My God, what kind of people are these!"

"The information Aunt Wang gave me is so unreliable! Look at the two of them, how can you simply describe them as 'a pair of oddly dressed socialites'?"

Xiao Xian nodded with lingering fear: "Exactly, and one of them even has a heretic who likes savory tofu pudding, it's simply incomprehensible!"

"What nonsense are you talking about? Salty tofu pudding is clearly the authentic way!"

Yifei rolled her eyes at Zeng Xiaoxian: "What's so great about sweet tofu pudding? If I want something sweet, why don't I just eat cake?"

Xiao Xian looked at Yi Fei in disbelief upon hearing this, then gritted his teeth and growled in a low voice, "Heretical! No wonder your cooking skills are terrible; you simply don't understand normal human tastes!"

"Get lost!"

Yifei was too lazy to get into a sweet-and-savory debate with this guy. She sat back on the sofa and looked through the information of the next couple: "My interview schedule is one couple every half hour. The next couple probably won't arrive for another twenty minutes."

"Judging from the information, this couple doesn't seem to have any major problems... at least they won't be as eye-catching as the previous 'emo' and 'non-mainstream' types."

Hearing this, Xiaoxian leaned closer, looking at the documents and muttering, "Aunt Wang's assessment of this couple is: 'Never-sparing pigeon spirits'?"

He looked up at Yifei: "What do you mean?"

Yifei shrugged: "How would I know?"

……

Forty minutes later, Yifei and Zeng Xiaoxian leaned back on the sofa, bored, counting their eyelashes.

"ah!!!"

Yifei, who had been holding back her anger for a long time, discovered that she actually had fewer eyelashes than Zeng Xiaoxian when she counted them.

She immediately lost her temper and screamed hysterically, "The third couple is almost here, why isn't the second couple here yet?!"

"It's obvious."

Xiaoxian yawned and said lazily, "It looks like we've been stood up."

"Even if they stand us up, they should at least send a message to explain. How can they just stand us up like that!"

Xiaoxian glanced at Fei: "Then how do you suggest we make the pigeon?"

"Should I send you a leave slip saying you have something to do and need to take a day off?"

"But I haven't even received a leave slip yet!"

Yifei angrily picked up her phone: "She doesn't reply to my messages, and she doesn't answer my calls. What kind of attitude is this?!"

As she spoke, she called the second couple again and again. If they didn't answer the first time, she called twice, and if they didn't answer twice, she called three times.

Yifei cursed and swore, hitting the phone twelve times in a row. Even Yue Fei would have returned by now if he had received twelve imperial edicts, but the couple didn't react at all.

It wasn't until the thirteenth call that the call was finally answered.

"What are you doing! What are you doing! Don't you know we're sleeping?!"

"You've called so many times, don't you have any manners?!"

Before Yifei could even speak, the other side had already launched into a menacing accusation: "Hit me, hit me, hit me! Are you trying to kill me or collect a debt?"

"We're all adults here, don't you understand basic social etiquette?"

"We didn't say we weren't going. If you're late, just wait a bit."

"With your level of patience, no wonder you're stuck sharing an apartment with other people!"

Upon hearing this, Yifei was so angry that her nostrils were practically flaring. She pointed at herself, trembling all over, and could only gasp for breath.

"Calm down, Yifei, calm down."

Zeng Xiaoxian patted Yifei on the back to comfort her, saying, "We are highly educated people, we won't stoop to their level."

Before Yifei could retort, the person on the other end of the phone said sarcastically, "What's the most important thing in shared living? Tolerance!"

"We didn't say we weren't going. We were only a little late, and you started calling us like a debt collector."

"This is just a test for you. If you can't even tolerate such a small test, then living with you will be like living in hell!"

"Pah, they're really going all out!"

The other party hung up the phone immediately.

Yifei and Xiaoxian's pupils dilated from the retort, and they froze on the spot.

After a long while, Yifei murmured to herself, "He insulted me?"

"Him? He insulted me?"

"He dared to insult me?!"

As Yifei spoke, she angrily opened her large hand and slammed it hard on the coffee table.

"Hehehehe..."

Xiao Xian stared blankly at the sight. He grabbed Yi Fei's arm, which was raised high and about to fall, with both hands, thus saving the life of the 3602 coffee table.

Based on his understanding of Yifei, that slap would have left the coffee table completely shattered, not even a single fragment larger than a fingernail.

"Feifei, little Feifei, Feifei Feifei."

Xiao Xian chuckled dryly, "Calm down, actually this is a good thing, at least, at least..."

"At least now we all understand what it means to be a 'non-confrontational pigeon spirit,' right?"

"Hehehehe..."

Yifei gritted her teeth and chuckled darkly, her cries sounding like the wailing of a succubus from hell.

"Yes, they've stopped fighting amongst themselves, so they're just dumping all the blame on me!"

"Address! Address! Their address must be in the documents!"

As she spoke, she reached for the documents on the coffee table. Xiao Xian, seeing this, reacted quickly, grabbed Yi Fei, and kicked the documents far away.

"Yifei, calm down!"

"Calm down, Ikki!"

Xiao Xian, who comes from Fujian, was so panicked that he could no longer speak Mandarin properly.

"Let me go! Let me go!"

Yifei's eyes were bloodshot as she bared her teeth and shouted, "It's one thing to not feel any remorse for being a pigeon, but you even dare to turn around and curse me!"

"Outrageous! Absolutely outrageous!"

"I'm going to kill them! Kill them!"

"I'm going to kill them all!!!"

(End of this chapter)