Don't use Type-Moon references in Oregairu!

②IF Worldline: Let's become virtual YouTubers to save the world (Part 2)

In the dimly lit room, Fujimaru Ritsuka rested her chin on her hands, wearing a pair of non-prescription glasses that gleamed with an eerie light like those of a dead fish: "So this is the warrior of Chaldea? How utterly laughable!"

He slammed his fist on the table in anger: "I shouldn't have believed your nonsense! Why didn't you come up with the whole VTuber plan?! If I made a mistake, please let the law punish me, instead of forcing me to form a cult!"

“My Flührer, things are not as you think.”

"Stop talking nonsense! I came here, all great, all I wanted was to live a peaceful life, and you set me up with this Chaldea Project, what exactly are you trying to do?"

Fujimaru Ritsuka beat her chest and stamped her feet, her face covered in a mask of pain.

"What you're saying, even little Leonardo da Vinci wouldn't understand, hehe. After all, I'm just an AI, I don't have any bad intentions, do I?"

Fujimaru Ritsuka glared indignantly at this supposedly harmless AI.

He was originally preparing to embark on a pink-hued youthful life at Toyonosaki Academy, hoping to get into a good university, find a good job, and ideally, a job that would allow him to travel the world, go on business trips, and see different places.

Then, when I woke up on my first day of school, a suitcase hit me on the head.

A projection appeared on the familiar pattern on the suitcase; it was actually the Little Da Vinci AI created by Da Vinci, who was here to help her seal off any potential turmoil in the world.

Has life always been targeting this handsome young man?

Fujimaru Ritsuka was rubbing her hands together, ready to make a big splash, when she received an unbelievable answer: "Find the right people, and then kidnap them to become VTubers!"

Too absurd to believe, Fujimaru Ritsuka repeatedly checked that she hadn't stopped at the wrong spot before giving up on thinking about it with a speechless expression.

But after receiving the bill today, he still couldn't help but feel like going crazy.

The VTubers under her banner are currently all male, all of whom were successfully contacted and lured away by Little Da Vinci through various means. But no matter what, Spartacus and Lancelot are really good at making money.

Looking at the long list of tips on the bill, he realized that he had suddenly escaped the financial crisis and was ready to embark on the road to financial freedom.

The problem is, everyone thinks that Chaldea Projet is full of either male hosts or weirdos. How am I supposed to keep trying to persuade female VTubers who want to join?

The image of little Leonardo da Vinci sticks out a cute tongue, then tilts his head, slightly closes one eye, and chuckles.

Hey, you idiot! I really want to tear you apart, you piece of trash AI!

Are you really not BB in disguise?

If you're going to be a BB, then come out now and use your almighty moon magic to turn everyone in the world into people who only watch VTubers. I can't take it anymore.

Fujimaru Ritsuka frantically grabbed at her smooth black hair, and began to withdraw into a state of self-isolation.

"You can't rest yet, Master! You haven't successfully lured a single female VTuber to your list!"

Recommended chapter! "The Holy Lord is saving the world again!"

Well... the author's cross-dressing photos are quite... revealing!

Xu Lian, a Buddhist youth, transmigrates into the body of the Holy Lord and says:

The Holy Lord was already very tired. He just wanted to sit on the throne, guard his own little territory, watch plays and listen to music every day, and then spend the day on a soft bed.

But why do they all have designs on my little patch of land?

Cosmic monsters destroy cities, interstellar insectoids swarm the earth, artificial intelligence and robotics threaten the planet, Thanos's army invades Earth, the Dark Lord devours the universe, and the remnants of the Old Gods reignite...

You guys are really good at making a ruckus!

Where are the Saints? Where are the Saints?! Come and drive them away!

(Free) I was being chased and beaten by Cthulhu, but luckily I am the light of Orion.

Some say that maturity is like a pebble, which emerges from the earth's crust in its youth, sharp and angular, believing itself to be unique in the world. Then, it is blown by the wind, submerged by the water, and crushed by its own kind, eventually losing all its sharpness and becoming smooth and free.

But who can tell Fujimaru Ritsuka that the wind and water in this other world are so evil?! Hastur, wake up! You're not the wind! And Cthulhu, you're not water either! Control your familiars! I'm still a child!

Fujimaru Ritsuka forcefully covered the mouth of the struggling girl in her arms, cold sweat pouring down her face as she watched the dark shadow flying overhead, while the strange fishy smell grew ever closer.

"Ugh!" The girl rolled her eyes and thrashed about as if her legs had given out.

Although she was in great pain, Fujimaru Ritsuka could tell from the blush on her cheeks and her watery eyes that she was actually feeling somewhat comfortable.

After catching her breath for a while, she nudged Fujimaru Ritsuka with her elbow, signaling him to let go.

"Your approach is a bit unconventional, Yukinoshita-kun," Fujimaru Ritsuka said with genuine admiration.

This was the first time he had ever seen someone actually using gunpowder to treat a wound in real life. Was this really just a ridiculous imitation of a movie?

The expressions are much more exaggerated than in the movie; it's like the difference between "A Bite of China" and "Food Wars!".

Moreover, beneath the snow, large burn scars marred the snow-white skin, making it look as if Emperor Qianlong had abruptly and drastically altered a famous painting with his seal.

Yukino Yukinoshita's lips were pale with a hint of purple, a clear sign of excessive blood loss. She smiled weakly, "If the gunpowder in the bullet hadn't been blessed, I wouldn't have dared to do something I've never done before. I'm sorry to have dragged you into this too."

This blessing is poisonous! She finally understood why her sister always warned her not to use this trick.

Fujimaru Ritsuka shook her head.

This time, I brought it on myself.

Having lived peacefully in this world for 17 years, after transferring to a new school, she suddenly decided to go to the seafood market to pick out ingredients and, out of curiosity, followed a mysterious person sneaking around nearby.

He was just curious to see which scoundrel would dare to cause trouble for the kind old lady at the fish market. The old lady had tearfully claimed she looked like her deceased grandson, and he'd sold her a whole fish for almost nothing. To repay her kindness, he wanted to show off his martial arts and wrestling skills.

Little did he expect that it wasn't Yazaku, but his new classmate.

Even more unexpectedly, the old woman would transform into a giant Deep One in a fit of rage.

At the time, I just wanted to yell "Excuse me!" and turn around and leave, but I didn't expect the other party to take care of me so quickly.

Then came the relentless pursuit that stirred up a hornet's nest.

Thinking of this, Fujimaru Ritsuka shook her head: "No, actually, if Yukinoshita hadn't exposed that old woman's true colors, I would have eaten the fish she gave me when I got home tonight. Food given by the Deep Ones... I wouldn't dare eat it."

His tone was quite subtle, and Yukino Yukinoshita naturally understood—consuming the flesh and blood of these mythical creatures would naturally also contaminate them; otherwise, where did all those miscellaneous soldiers in the fish market come from?

She never expected that there would be beings almost like Elders of the Deep. If they hadn't used magic to confuse others, she and Fujimaru Ritsuka wouldn't have been so isolated and helpless.

But there is still hope.

Even if I die, there is still a sliver of hope that innocent people can escape.

She solemnly took out a miniature storage device and handed it to Fujimaru Ritsuka: "Take this. Then, I will create an opportunity for you to go to the police station to find Sasagawa Yagokoro."

Then, she struggled to sit up, dragging her roughly treated injured leg, raised her pistol, and prepared to fight to the death.

Fujimaru Ritsuka touched the stone-like object in her arms, which was beginning to lose its stone-like texture, and silently followed her unsteady steps.

The smell of the sea grew stronger, and in the dim moonlight, the monsters from the deep sea revealed their terrifying appearance, the long-handled weapons in their hands showing a frightening sharpness.

Under the cover of dark clouds, he heard a tremendous flapping of wings; the Byakkis were approaching.

Yukino Yukinoshita's mood grew increasingly heavy. If it weren't for those damned guys cooperating, how could the Deep Ones have possibly kept her, a veteran investigator, alive?

Tonight's events were full of strange occurrences. Whether it was the large number of Deep Ones appearing in a bustling area like Chiba City, or the Byakki and Deep Ones who should have disliked each other, everything was beyond her previous experience.

However, instead of trying to figure out what happened, it would be better to think about how to get the boy next to them out and hand the information over to the Bureau of Abnormal Creatures Investigation.

The Deep Ones slowly gathered around, and the sound of Byakki flapping its wings grew closer, but for some reason, they seemed to be wary of something.

"Ah, what a disgusting smell! What a sinner! What a sinner!" Both the Byakki and the Deep Ones cursed the human in front of them with obscure language—that was Fujimaru Ritsuka hiding behind the girl.

Yukino Yukinoshita gripped her pistol tightly. She couldn't understand the language of these Old Ones' familiars at all, but looking at their resentful eyes, she vaguely guessed that the reason she was being hunted down by two familiars who should have been supporting the Great Ones was because of this strange classmate behind her?!

"What exactly did you do?" Yukinoshita asked Fujimaru Ritsuka behind her in a low voice as they slowly surrounded her, warily watching them approach.

"If I could, I'd also like to say I don't know." Fujimaru Ritsuka took something out and held it in her hand.

Yukinoshita noticed it with her sharp eyes; it was a palm-sized object with a handle adorned with marble patterns for gripping, and a shield-like body with a crystal-like texture. And at its end, the stone-like outer layer that had once covered it seemed to have finally faded away.

"Evil God! Evil God!" The Byakkis and Deep Ones launched a fierce attack.

Hundreds of monsters roared and charged forward, the heavy stench filling Yukino Yukinoshita with despair.

"Don't be afraid, Yukina. Do you believe in the light?"

To Yukino's disbelief, the shield on the handle opened, revealing a core as bright as the sun.

The light from Orion has reached Earth once again.

The great evil god from Orion once again faces its two defeated adversaries.

(The Cthulhu God of Light is on hiatus!)

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P.S. Since this is a free side story, let me mention a reference: As everyone knows, the Cthulhu Mythos is a postmodern literary system created by multiple authors, and the figure of Yahweh has appeared subtly within it. For example, Lord Raoul once wrote in his book: "An evil being from the universe caused a great flood, submerging civilization and Cthulhu into the sea." Auguste Derleth, who proposed dualism and the four elements, wrote: "He stretched out lightning-like arms, seized Hastur and Cthulhu, and threw them into the Pacific Ocean and the void."

Yeah, so the final boss that Tiga faced back then was a reference to Gatanothor, who was associated with the elemental element. It might have been a tiny bit of an elemental homage. It was pretty cool back then, but it's rubbish now.

The inspiration for the beginning of this side story comes from this. In this opening, Tiga is limited to this secondary setting, replacing the concept of the Orion God, which is why he is chased and beaten by Byakki and Deep One. Although they certainly didn't expect to encounter the real deal.

On a side note, the manga adaptation of the Final Holy War stage play is even more outrageous. Camilla is even portrayed as a resentful woman who was abandoned by Tiga. I'm speechless.

If-Fate/Tribune-Certified-Rebel Against the Fate of Uma Musume Girls

A note at the beginning: This "what if" side story is a little idea that came to me recently after watching Uma Musume Pretty Derby and Anko from Kabala no Umaru.

In this chapter, Golden Journey is Fujimaru Ritsuka's only horse girl, meaning she's the father of Golden Ship. It seems she only appears briefly in the first season.

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Talent and ability are like a ghost, a ghost of talentism, haunting the racetrack.

"Sprint! Sprint! The East Sea Emperor is sprinting! The disadvantages on the outer rim have not affected her progress at all. The East Sea King is coming! She has overtaken her! The East Sea Emperor has made it! The East Sea Emperor has won the Japanese Derby!"

Fujimaru Ritsuka leaned against the railing listlessly, a carrot-flavored lollipop dangling from her mouth, staring blankly as she watched the figure, like an arrow, rush past the finish line.

He suddenly asked the person next to him, "Hey, what do you think of the Golden Journey? It seems like an undefeated triple crown is within reach. What do you think?"

The short-haired girl in sportswear rested her chin on the railing of the stands, looking listless: "How else can we see? With our eyes, of course."

"Hey, hey, hey, this is a rare day off, I'm not here to listen to your lame jokes."

"You know it's a rare day off? I'm so tired, and my Trenal came over to watch the genius show off. I really want to retire right now."

Fujimaru Ritsuka crossed her arms, pondered for a moment, and then nodded seriously: "Indeed, it would be better to just retire."