Honkai Impact 3rd: My Days as a Captain in Schicksal

"That's too much... I want to celebrate Children's Day too!"

...It seems like something a little off has gotten mixed in.

"I mean... I can understand Bronya, but why are you all joining in?!" Keng Huo looked at the crowded room with despair, marveling at how contagious the "Children's Day Syndrome" was. "Children's Day... are you even children?!"

“Yes!” Kiana stepped forward confidently, her chest almost hitting the roof of her mouth. She held her chin up, appearing arrogant and self-righteous. “Anyone under the age of 18 is a child! According to the laws of Shenzhou, we are children!”

Keng Huo opened his mouth, wanting to refute, but after looking at the group of people behind her, he could only swallow his words.

There was no other way; there were so many of them. Even with four people holding down their own arms and legs, there was still room for Himeko to hug her face and for four others to record and cheer her on the whole time…

"What are you trying to do?" Keng Huo took a step back, various escape methods flashing through his mind, but he rejected them one by one.

There was no way around it. The Oath of Judah was blocking the living room window, with Theresa leaning against the cross, glaring menacingly. Yae Sakura seemed to be threatening at the doorway, wiping a knife that shouldn't be being maintained there with deerskin. Mei was subtly blocking the path to the kitchen, making it impossible to escape through the kitchen window. The hallway leading to the study was completely blocked by a Heavy Bunny lying there for some reason, pretending to be an interior decoration. Even the stairs leading upstairs were occupied. Bronya sat upright on the stairs, and unless Keng Huo jumped over her head, it would be impossible for her to reach the second floor and escape through her bedroom window.

Of course, if he really did that, he would probably face Bronya's relentless pursuit—and might even bring Theresa along. Don't ask how Keng Huo knows; these two always seem to reach a mysterious consensus on sensitive topics like height.

"Captain?" Himeko smiled and nudged Kiana with her shoulder. "Men who are always making excuses aren't very popular, you know?"

"I..." Keng Huo stretched his neck and stared wide-eyed, looking like his worldview had been completely shattered. He never imagined that these people would pull such a stunt on him today.

The academy is currently in a tense period: Seele's arrival plan is about to reach its final stage, Cocolia is putting pressure on St. Freya Academy for Seele's sake, and Theresa just a few days ago gave him a project to have the newly assembled Far East Branch First Airport cooperate with St. Freya Academy's air defense network. In all this busyness, they actually remembered to celebrate Children's Day?

Look at your ID cards! Only Bronya barely qualifies as a "child"! Even if it's under the guise of reminiscing about childhood, it's just too ridiculous! Look at this older single woman, look at this old lady trying to act cute, and look at that fox who's probably tens of thousands of years old but still pretending to be a child, and that five-hundred-year-old anthropomorphic red fox-donkey who doesn't know how to be ashamed. This bunch of people aren't going out to celebrate Children's Day, they're going to celebrate a birthday!

Should I also present each person with a banner that reads "May your happiness be as boundless as the Eastern Sea and your longevity as enduring as the Southern Mountain"?

Of course, Kiana must be excluded from this list, because in terms of intelligence...

Kiana suddenly glared at Keng Huo, startling him so much that he didn't dare to think any further.

Hmm... Is there anyone who forgot to complain? Uh... never mind, never mind.

……

Keng Huo turned around and counted the number of people following behind him.

Yae Sakura, Himeko, Theresa, Kiana, Mei, Bronya, and Fu Hua who came along for the fun, plus Shigure Kira and her bound equipment White who appeared out of nowhere, making a total of eleven people including myself. Maybe some of them will eat more, so I might as well buy a few more sets...

"Hello, I'd like ten servings each of the Homura A-Dream A, B, and C meals..."

"Captain, um..." Fu Hua quickly stopped him when she heard Keng Huo ordering the dishes, "There are only about ten of us..."

"It's okay, Kiana's here." Keng Huo waved his hand without turning his head, comforting Fu Hua, "If it's not enough later, I'll add more..."

"Mmm!" Kiana proudly put her hands on her hips, clearly thinking it was a commendable skill.

Fu Hua stared blankly at Kiana, who was standing with her hands on her hips, unable to utter a single word.

Just then, Bronya squeezed her way to Keng Huo's side, raised her small face, and said to the clerk in a serious tone, "Please add another A set meal, thank you."

Keng Huo paused for a moment, then laughed. He casually patted Bronya's head, as if to comfort her: "Don't worry, we'll buy the other portion after we finish eating it. Otherwise, the fried chicken won't taste good if it sits for too long."

Bronya turned to look at Keng Huo, her head tilting slightly in confusion, but then she felt that what Keng Huo said made sense, so she lowered her head and said nothing more.

"Are you sure it's thirty set meals?" the clerk asked somewhat nervously. "Are you sure? Although these are all children's sets... the portions for Children's Day are quite generous..."

"Okay, don't worry, we can order more if it's not enough." Keng Huo gave the clerk a bright smile. "The children at our St. Freya Kindergarten are all at the age where they are growing and can eat a lot."

"...This is a payment of two thousand one hundred and twenty yuan. Would you like to pay by card?"

……

“Every time I watch Kiana eat, I feel like the law of conservation of mass has been overturned…” Fu Hua lowered her head and glanced at Kiana’s flat stomach, really wanting to see if Kiana’s esophagus was connected to another dimension. “Why is this happening…”

"Of course it's because I absorb it well!" Kiana patted her stomach. "It gets absorbed as soon as it goes in, so my stomach isn't bloated—Class President, you just don't eat enough, that's why you look so thin..."

Fu Hua's face immediately darkened. Apart from Himeko, who was already lying motionless on the table with a burp, and Kiana, the culprit, everyone at the table felt the low pressure, like the Siberian cold wind.

However, Fu Hua did not erupt as everyone expected. Instead, she thoughtfully considered the logic in Kiana's words: "Hmm... indeed, protein intake does affect muscle mass, so there is some truth to that. However, consuming too much protein can put a serious burden on the kidneys. Kiana, having a good appetite is a good thing, but eating too much can also put a strain on the body."

Kiana was slightly surprised that Fu Hua hadn't criticized her harshly this time, but after struggling to swallow the fried chicken in her mouth, she asked with some astonishment, "Hey? Class monitor, why have you suddenly changed your attitude?"

"..." Fu Hua silently pushed up her glasses, the glare from the lenses obscuring her gaze. "However, fried foods are very high in fat, and you need to do a lot of exercise to offset that..."

Kiana froze, silently shifting her gaze elsewhere, her face flushed red, looking like she desperately wanted to say something to change the subject but couldn't.

Seeing this, Keng Huo quickly tried to smooth things over, but before he could speak, Fu Hua finished her sentence: "How about we double today's training? Of course, training must be done step by step; doubling it today is just the beginning. To reduce the amount of oil you ate today, I think it would take at least half a month of doubled training... Kiana, I hope you don't give up. The headmaster specifically asked me to make sure you pass the Valkyrie year-end assessment. Just endure a little hardship, and it will pass..."

"No!" Kiana cried out in pain, slumping onto the table and pushing aside the mountain of hamburgers blocking her view, revealing Theresa's guilty face as she guiltily ate fries behind it. "Auntie! This is going to kill us! The daily training load is already killing us! Auntie, say something! I'm your niece! Can you really bear to watch your niece be trained to death?"

Theresa was so nervous she almost slid under the table. She wasn't tall to begin with, and with Kiana lying on the table, she only needed to slide slightly to lower her eyes below the table surface.

But Kiana is no ordinary person. Through years of wits and courage against Keng Huo, she has long mastered the ability to see through other people's intentions. With a kick, she firmly blocked Theresa's leg under the table, preventing her from sliding further under the table to avoid her sight.

Theresa tried to rub against Kiana a few times, but when she realized that Kiana had blocked her way out, she didn't dare to look up. She reached out in that position, pulled the hamburger mountain that Kiana had pushed aside, and covered Kiana's arm with it, blocking her view.

Seeing that Theresa was unwilling to answer the question, Kiana could only look to Keng Huo for help with teary eyes.

Keng Huo quickly tried to smooth things over: "Ahem... Fu Hua, stop joking. I think we should just put the extra effort into improving our theoretical knowledge. After all, using our brains is also very energy-consuming..."

"Waaah... Keng Huo! I don't like you anymore! I'll never like you again!"

"Kiana, instead of that, I think you should focus on your theory grades. Even though you're a full Valkyrie now, there's a risk of being demoted if you don't pass the year-end assessment." Himeko waved the beer can in her hand, glancing sideways at Kiana. She had been wanting to bring up Kiana's theory grades for a while now.

Wait, a beer can!?

Keng Huo slammed his hand on the table and stood up, righteously rebuking Himeko: "Aren't you a minor today? A minor drinking alcohol? Hand over your beer!"

Himeko's eyes widened, but she had clearly anticipated this situation. She hid the beer can in her bosom, hunched her neck, and tilted her head, looking pitiful. But what she said was anything but pitiful: "How can you be so disrespectful to the elderly and children! I'm a child today! Is this how you treat a cute little girl?"

Keng Huo covered his face and sat back down in his seat: "...Sorry, for a moment I thought I saw Qin Lingyin..."

"...I'm nothing like that mentally ill person, okay! Neither physically nor mentally!"

A war started by Kiana has inadvertently spread to the Valkyries' entire dining table. Kiana, who was the one who ignited this war, saw that things were not going well and tried to sneak away. However, she did not expect that as soon as she pushed her chair back, Himeko, who had somehow regained her energy, jumped onto her lap.

Himeko's eyes sparkled, and she seemed unusually excited: "Kiana-neechan, there's a children's area over there~ Will you come with me to play on the slide?"

Kiana stole a glance at Keng Huo, who was trying to spread the flames of war to Shigure Kira but couldn't find a way in, and then stole another glance at Yae Sakura, who was concentrating on drawing little figures on a cardboard box with fries and ketchup, pretending to be dead. She gently nudged Himeko and whispered, "I need to go to the bathroom—why don't you go play with your older sister?"

"Waaah...no~ Big sister said she doesn't want to go..." Himeko clung tightly to Kiana's leg like a lifeline, looking like a leg ring. "Come play with me~ please~ please~"

Kiana's eyes darted around among the people present, and it took her a lot of effort to remove Himeko from her lap: "I really need to go to the restroom... Go find your uncle... and have him take you out to play..."

"Oh!" Himeko seemed to understand something now. "That's right! Uncle loves to play that!"

After saying that, Himeko flew over to Keng Huo, who had somehow changed to a heartbroken and grief-stricken expression, full of energy: "Uncle! Shall we go play in the children's area over there?"

"I, Keng, have been teaching and nurturing students for so many years, and what about the moral character I've taught you? Patting someone's head is an important means of emotional communication between children and adults, a key to a relationship of trust and being trusted, and it also serves as an important reward mechanism—Hiyomaru, what did you say? Say it again!"

Himeko burst out laughing, even bending over backwards with laughter, finally finding a way to retort to Keng Huo: "Yeah, yeah, you should go play with Himeko, you doting uncle!"

Keng Huo, with a kind and benevolent expression, held up Hishiyomaru. His gentle smile even sent chills down Hishiyomaru's spine: "What did you just say... big?"

Himeko froze, completely bewildered. Although she felt she hadn't said anything wrong, Keng Huo seemed to be on the verge of anger. She hesitated for a moment, then carefully considered what to say.

"Big...burp—"

Kiana's Birthday Bonus: Many Years Later, Will We Still Remember?

A little boy with short black hair was running across the floor, dragging a white bear plush toy bigger than himself. Behind him followed a little girl with white hair and braids, who looked to be about kindergarten age, anxiously chasing after him: "Give it to me...give it to me..."

"What are you doing! Stop! Don't bully your brother!" Hearing the noise in the living room, the father came out of his study and loudly stopped the two naughty children.

"I...I didn't bully my brother this time...My brother bullied me, he stole the big teddy bear!" The little girl cried out, feeling wronged, after hearing her father's reprimand. "I didn't..."

"Who's talking to you? I'm talking to Kengdie." The father, looking completely bewildered, snatched the teddy bear his son was dragging, dusted it off, and placed it neatly on the sofa. "Show some respect to your older brother! How can you be so disrespectful!"

"Huh?" The little boy called Kengdie looked confused. "Who?"

"Your eldest brother," the father said, sitting beside the doll with one arm draped over its shoulder, introducing it to the children with great seriousness, like two brothers. "You never asked before, so I forgot to mention it. Now let me introduce you. This is your eldest brother, his name is 'Ren,' the fruit of our love on the night your mother and I became a couple... You must respect your eldest brother, understand? Kengdie, Kengma?"

"Oh... so I'm the second child?" Kengdie's eyes were full of disbelief. "No wonder Mom always says I'm the second child... I thought Mom was scolding me..."

A hand adorned with a black and white woven bracelet suddenly appeared from behind the father, its fingers jabbing hard into the back of his head. The voice, filled with rage and fury, snapped, "What are you saying! Don't corrupt the child!"

The husband, who was about to launch into a long, rambling speech, suddenly wilted like a frostbitten eggplant, coughed twice with a subtle expression, and said, "No, I was just explaining our family tree to the kids..."

"Eat your food!" The wife with long white hair angrily rubbed her husband's ear. "Stop bragging! Go get the rice."

"Okay, okay, let's eat." The husband hurriedly stood up, secretly winked at the two children, and rushed to the kitchen to get the rice.

Turning to her child, the wife's expression softened considerably, a stark contrast to her previous aggressive demeanor: "Go wash your hands, it's time to eat."

"Ok!"

The two children, one on each side of their mother's hand, walked and looked back, trying to decipher the meaning behind their father's winking. The father, meanwhile, secretly glanced at his wife's back, tiptoed to the window, looked outside to make sure no one was there, and then went back to get the rice.

Kengdie tilted her head back slightly, looking towards her younger sister from behind her mother, and her eyes met Kengma's. After a brief exchange of glances, they both confirmed one thing—neither of them seemed to understand the meaning behind their father's winking and gesturing.

A moment later, his wife returned to the restaurant with two clean little children and started preparing dinner.

"Today, to put it simply, is your mother's birthday." At the dinner table, the husband gave a brief summary, outlining the core idea and guiding principle of the meal, "In short, don't eat too much, there's a birthday cake later."

The wife did not object to her husband's unromantic behavior; she simply smiled quietly, finding the stability and tranquility quite appealing.

Yes, something simple and ordinary is best.

It's better than Christmas fireworks, and even more romantic than candlelight.

It's better than something magnificent, even better than an epic tale of heroes.

Because this is the "ordinary" life that only the winners in life are entitled to enjoy.

The wife suddenly became smug, giving her husband a haughty glance that left him completely bewildered.

At the dinner table, the son stared longingly at the braised pork knuckle, but because he was too short to reach it, he could only ask his father for help: "Dad—that—I want to eat that meat, can you get it for me?"

The husband followed his son's eager gaze to the plate of pork knuckle, then met his wife's eyes as she warily guarded her food.

The husband turned around and smiled kindly: "I won't."

"..."

The daughter beside him sighed knowingly and secretly nudged her brother: "Don't think about it, Dad is biased."

"Mom..." The son's face was instantly filled with disappointment. His expression subtly changed, he sniffed, and his eyes immediately welled up with tears. "I...I want to eat meat..."

"Okay, okay, okay." The mother was immediately at a loss for words. She picked up a large plate of braised pork knuckle and placed it in front of her son, while pushing the plate of cucumber salad in front of her son to her husband.

Seeing that his son had succeeded, the husband immediately had the same idea. After openly rubbing his eyes with onions, he looked at his wife with teary eyes and said, "Wife... I... I want to too..."

"Oh, well, you think about it."