In crossover anime, who isn't a childhood friend?

Her relationship with Qianye, at least from her perspective, will undergo changes in her eyes and mindset towards him that she cannot predict.

She wondered, is this really what I want?

But at least, if they could stop now that the warning signs are appearing...

As time went by, Shika was torn between her inner thoughts and the pressure she felt gradually increased.

Finally, she took a deep breath to calm her racing heart, and mustered the courage to turn the page.

She wanted to know everything about Qianye—his thoughts, his inner world, everything about him…

Once she returned to his room and took the diary in her hands, there was no turning back.

The following is a diary entry.

Unlike before, when I would only write down my thoughts after a period of time, or when I had something specific I wanted to express or something I wanted to record.

Instead, it was unusual to see such meticulous and detailed daily recording, resembling the rigorous and detailed data output of a scientific research laboratory.

The content and focus of the notes were almost entirely about her.

...

May 3rd

Today is the fifth day since Sister Shihua injured her ankle.

Actually, as long as she walks normally and doesn't rush her pace, you can't tell that she has any mobility issues.

She got up early this morning to go to the supermarket to buy some fresh vegetables and fruits to put in the refrigerator. She declined my offer to accompany her, saying that she had already recovered, but I was still worried and insisted on going with her.

In the supermarket, she calmly selected items in front of the shelves, while I pushed the shopping cart beside her.

I know in my heart that my worries are just excuses.

I really like and enjoy being with Sister Shihua, which is why I insisted on going out with her.

I feel that she is quite different from the girls around me, and I don't know how to describe that feeling in words.

But it's always that comfortable and pleasant feeling that makes you feel happy involuntarily.

It's really strange; I don't think I've ever felt this way about anyone before.

There's no father among the family members.

Yukino seems to have a little bit... but it's not as obvious as when I was next to Toka.

It's a bit strange.

...

May 4th

Today I asked Yukino what she thought of her older sister, Haruno. Because I mentioned her sister's name several times, she suddenly stared at me very warily.

Instead of answering my questions, she asked me a whole bunch of questions. I really don't understand what she's thinking.

I couldn't get any conclusions from her, so I asked a few classmates about their older sisters, and they teased me, saying I was into older sister relationships.

A bunch of brats, so incredibly immature. How can asking a simple question be interpreted as being a sister-complex? It's incomprehensible.

Forget it, I'll try to figure something out myself.

...

May 5th

I made a special trip to the library today and borrowed two books.

One book is "Ego and Unconsciousness," and the other is "Reports on Adolescent Psychological Analysis."

I read the introductions of both books, which should help resolve my doubts.

...

May 6th

Today, Shihua has fully recovered and can jump around again, which means I no longer need to take her to and from school, and I no longer need to accompany her when she goes to the supermarket.

I'm a little reluctant to admit it, and I haven't shown it outwardly, but I can't help feeling a bit disappointed.

I read half of the "Reports on Adolescent Psychological Analysis" that I borrowed yesterday, and a certain viewpoint or theme detailed in it caught my attention.

This refers to the Oedipus complex.

This is also a term used in the psychoanalytic school of psychology, originating from the Greek myth of Oedipus, who unintentionally killed his father and married his mother.

Of course, I have no memory of my biological mother since I was a child.

To date, many people have shown sympathy or pity for the fact that I don't have a mother.

But I really don't care. I don't really have any real feelings about this, and I won't feel sad or upset because of it.

It's just that things I haven't noticed might still exist.

The book points out that almost all human boys develop a special emotional dependence on their mothers during early childhood. This attachment is unconscious and immature; it is simply a need for intimacy, companionship, care, and security.

Based on this statement, could my current feelings of affection for Sister Shihua also be explained by this reasoning?

From as far back as I can remember, there has never been a mother figure in my life.

Naturally, the feeling of needing care and companionship cannot be directed to a specific target and can only be suppressed in the heart.

Now, Sister Shihua's needs are met, and compared to Aunt Runzi, she spends more time by my side.

That's why my feelings, which had been long unfulfilled for years, were transferred to her because she shared similar qualities. (Circling)

It was precisely because of the repression I've felt over the years that my affection for Sister Shihua, who appeared in my life, grew so quickly.

Is that possible?

...

May 7th

Aunt Runzi is back, and she brought gifts for everyone.

Sister Shihua's gift was two sets of intimate apparel.

I was in the living room when I delivered the gift. Sister Shihua seemed to be in a good mood, saying something like, "It just so happens that my bras are starting to get a little tight."

She even held up her bra in front of her chest to show off.

If possible, I really hope she can pay a little more attention to my existence.

No matter what, I am a man.

But in her eyes, she was probably just a little kid in elementary school, so there was no need for her to worry about so much.

Today, for the first time without any reason, I had the thought that I wish I had been born a few years earlier.

...

May 8th

I……

Well, there's nothing wrong with saying it. The point of writing a diary is to record one's true thoughts.

I initially intended to relieve my inner pressure, and I thought I would give up after writing for a few days, but I didn't expect to persevere.

This proves that keeping a diary can indeed have some beneficial effects on me.

I...had a wet dream last night.

This feeling is so wonderful, I feel it's necessary to record it.

Although it happened while I was unconscious and asleep, I was still able to roughly recall the feeling afterward.

I felt a jolt, followed by a faint electric current running through my head, and a very brief moment of comfort flashed by before I was fully awake.

If my future self sees this text, please don't laugh; after all, this is a perfectly normal physiological condition.

The point is that the person I dream about is neither a young and beautiful screen actress, nor... the one I imagine I might marry someday.

It was Sister Shihua, with whom I've grown increasingly close over this period of time.

I don't know why I dreamed about her... I dreamed that she was wearing the new bra she had just tried on last night, and we were doing *that* together.

Unfortunately, I woke up before I could actually get to that point.

I secretly washed my underwear in the bathroom at night; I don't think anyone noticed.

Sister Shihua...

Takanashi Tenka...

Why her of all people... I don't understand, I really don't understand.

...

Toka, her breathing quickened, looked up from her diary.

She pressed one hand against her chest, her moist eyes gazing out the window as she took deep breaths.

She was slightly flushed, not from anger, but from a mixture of shyness and embarrassment.

She never expected that Qianye had recorded his own affairs in such detail in his diary.

Even... even the specific feelings at the time were written down.

Also, did he have dreams about himself so early on? He even dreamt about himself wearing only underwear...

It was so early on that he... he... he did it to himself...!

Mmm...

Outside the window, a dark wing is currently perched on the balcony, enjoying the gentle breeze.

Turning his head to look at Shika, who was lying on the bed with her hands covering her face, curled up in a ball, his dark eyes revealed a look of confusion.

Humans are really strange; they always make these inexplicable movements.

After rolling around on the bed a few times, Shihua patted her bright red face and sat up again.

After calming down a bit.

She also realized what was happening and noticed other details.