Konoha Drunkard

At this time, Shanks was unaware that the future world destroyer was coming to settle accounts with him. He was still lying under the big tree at school, his grandfather picking up the wine jug on the table, basking in the sun and drinking wine.

"Ah! I would trade the happiness of my brother Danzo and brother Obito's lower bodies for such a life forever!" Shanks exclaimed shamelessly.

"Damn it! You lied to me!" Just as Shanks was feeling smug, an angry voice came from behind him.

"Huh? Obito, what's wrong? Your Sharingan is almost coming out." Shanks turned around and looked at the angry Obito.

"You lied to me! You said it was a secret assessment? Everyone says there's no such thing!" Obito shouted, pointing at Shanks. He had lost face big time today.

"What do you mean I'm lying to you? It's true! Who told you there's no such thing?" Shanks said, his eyes darting around. He hadn't expected to be exposed so quickly; he thought he'd have to wait a few days.

In fact, Shanks knew he couldn't fool Obito for long. Even if the deception was exposed, Obito would be happy for a few days, and it would be easy to explain later. However, Shanks didn't realize that, thanks to his persuasion, Obito completely believed in this secret test and became incredibly arrogant, behaving like the arrogant Madara Uchiha. And, to make matters worse, he ran into some ninjas who disliked the Uchiha clan...

"They say they were your former students! They say you didn't tell them that!" Obito said angrily.

"Tch! I know, you must be showing off everywhere, aren't you?" Shanks looked at Obito with disdain.

"No way! I... I was just stating the facts!" Obito exclaimed, as if his secret had been exposed.

"Then there must be! It's said to be a secret assessment, how could those marginalized people in the villages possibly know? And you're just a kid and you're going around showing off. Not everyone is as magnanimous as me. Isn't it normal to get roasted?" Shanks's grandfather, looking completely at ease, took a sip of his drink.

At this moment, Kakashi caught up and saw that Obito had been fooled by the middle-aged man again. He felt contempt for the middle-aged man, thinking that all he knew was how to fool children.

"Really?" Obito couldn't be fooled by Shanks after all, and asked somewhat hesitantly.

"Of course it's true. Here's a creed for ninjas in the ninja world: take out your pen and paper and start taking notes," Shanks said smugly, lounging in his chair.

"Oh! Oh." After hearing Shanks' words, Obito blankly took out a pen and a small notebook from his ninja tool bag.

Kakashi, watching the two of them speechlessly from afar, knew that Obito had already forgotten his anger at discovering he had been tricked, and was now acting like a model student.

"Remember this! If you want to succeed in the ninja world, remember two words: 'Humble.' As the saying goes, humility is the most awesome form of boasting! Do you see Kakashi's father boasting about his great achievements everywhere? Do you see the Legendary Sannin of Konoha boasting about their accomplishments everywhere? And look at your headmaster, me! When I was just over nine years old, I killed the Second Kazekage, forcing Sunagakure to surrender in the first battle. I single-handedly stormed Kirigakure and cut it in two. I led three thousand men to blockade more than ten thousand Kumogakure ninja for over half a year. I was proud of Iwagakure for giving me face and taking the initiative to negotiate peace. Did I boast about these things? Remember them?" Shanks took the opportunity to brag about himself again; these achievements were enough for him to boast about for a lifetime.

Kadian stood speechlessly in the distance, gazing at the sky where even the sun seemed ashamed to hide. "You call this showing off? What's with you checking your textbooks every day to see if your deeds are even mentioned?"

"Hmm. Hmm! Okay! What's the second one?" After taking notes like a good student, Obito continued to ask.

"Secondly, ninjas are a group of people who can't be guessed by common sense. Since they can't be guessed by common sense, what they say is definitely three parts truth and seven parts falsehood, or one part truth and nine parts falsehood. They're not your teachers, why would they tell you the truth? Do you think everyone is as honest as Principal Shanks? So you have to use your own brain and deduce who can be believed and who can't! Just now, you actually doubted Principal Shanks because of two unknown ninjas? That hurt me!" Shanks continued to deceive, and naive teenagers like Obito were the easiest to fool.

Listening to Shanks' second point from afar, Kakashi finally understood why so many people had been fooled by him. His second point wasn't entirely correct, but it wasn't entirely wrong either; it was half true and half false, with nine parts truth and one part falsehood, which made it even easier for people to believe. If Kakashi hadn't known that he was fooling Obito, he almost would have believed it himself.

"Oh, oh! But... they say they are your students. Can't we trust the students you teach?" After finishing his notes, Brother Obito asked obediently like a good student.

If Kame Saburo saw Obito looking like this, he'd probably beat him to a pulp. "Damn it, I've been taking my classes for over half a year and I've never seen you so attentive. You're so enthusiastic about listening to this nonsense."

"Tch! I have tons of students. Headmaster, I've got students all over the village. Even a father can have two completely different sons. With so many students, what's so strange about occasionally producing one or two rotten apples? You still don't have enough life experience!" Shanks leisurely picked up the bottle and toasted himself.

".......Isn't this another time to complain about the Hokage's two sons?" A large bead of sweat appeared on the back of Kakashi's forehead.

"What the hell! What's the third point?" Brother Obito seemed to suddenly realize something, but it was unclear whether he truly understood.

"The third and most important point, let me emphasize this! It's what I told you during yesterday's assessment: courage! A ninja must have courage, even a genin must have the heart to kill a jonin! The bigger your heart, the greater your potential, and the further you can go in the future. As long as you have enough courage, you can become the strongest! So yesterday's secret assessment was a test of your courage. If you don't even dare to open the little wooden box, what kind of ninja are you? Go home, get married, have kids, and that's it." Shanks seriously brought out his method of cultivating cannon fodder to fool Obito, he really didn't believe he couldn't fool the current happy-go-lucky Obito.

223. Can brag anywhere

"..." Kakashi felt like this middle-aged man was teaching Obito how to die the fastest.

"Four countries! So there are so many beliefs for being a ninja!" Obito has been completely fooled by Shanks.

"Of course! Let me tell you, this is the culmination of my many years in the ninja world. I wouldn't pass it on to just anyone. I only passed it on to you because I believe you will be extraordinary in the future! It's a pity you're too young, otherwise I would have introduced my daughter to you! Alas! We're not meant to be!" Shanks added fuel to the fire.

"..." Kadian covered his face. This middle-aged man had said the same thing to him years ago, and as a result, several bottles of wine went missing from his family's collection...

"Wh...what?! I already have someone I like!" When Obito heard Shanks' last sentence, his mind flashed back to his world of Rin, and his face turned red with embarrassment.

"Haha! Go back and memorize the three points I taught you today, and I guarantee you'll benefit from them for life!" Shanks raised an eyebrow.

"Yes! I will remember it well." Obito carefully put the little notebook into his ninja tool bag like a precious treasure.

Not long after Obito left the Ninja Academy, he saw Kakashi staring at him with dead fish eyes.

"You bastard Kakashi, what are you doing here?" Obito said fiercely to his rival.

"How's it going? Can you go on your mission now? You haven't finished today's mission yet." Kadian said to this idiot indifferently.

"Hmph! I'll go then, I'll definitely finish before you," Obito said with high spirits.

"..." Kadian looked at him without saying anything, afraid that talking to him too much would lower his IQ.

Two small figures headed towards the Thousand Hands Clan's territory to renovate the rooftops.

.........

Shanks had just tricked Obito away, and before he had even rested for long, Jiraiya came to find him, looking very serious.

"Captain, the Toad Sage has woken up and wants to see you," Jiraiya said, looking at Shanks, who was lying down drinking and sunbathing.

He was at home writing his paper on human anatomy today, just getting some inspiration, when he was notified that the old toad who could dream of the future had woken up and wanted to see his captain. Of course, his paper was more important than saving the world, and fearing the toad master had fallen asleep again, he hurriedly ran to find Shanks.

"What? Why is that old toad seeing me? I'm not even familiar with it," Shanks said lazily.

"I don't know, Captain, let's go quickly. The Sage might be asleep again if we stay too long. Summoning Jutsu!" Jiraiya said, summoning Gamabunta, the Toad, before Shanks could speak.

"Thank you for your trouble, Wen Tai!"

"Let's go!" Gamabunta said, then used Reverse Summoning to teleport Jiraiya and Shanks directly to Mount Toad.

Shanks looked at the giant old toad sitting on the huge stool in front of him and imagined with satisfaction that the two toads beside him, each only the size of a fist, were his children.

"Greetings, Toad Sage. What brings you here?" Shanks had no racial prejudice against his ancestor's brother, the elderly toad who was still alive. Who knew just how powerful the elderly toad was? Just the fact that he had lived so long was enough to easily defeat the Six Paths Elder.

"Young man, I saw you in my dream!" The old toad squinted, looking like he hadn't woken up yet.

"Sage, can I refuse? Although we have racial discrimination, my sexual orientation is still normal. I like human women!" Shanks said shyly.

"boom!"

The surrounding toads and Jiraiya were utterly dumbfounded!

"Captain, stop joking around. Listen to what the Sage is saying, or he'll fall asleep again." Jiraiya jumped up and grabbed Shanks' collar, shaking him wildly.

"Heh heh. What a humorous little devil, much more interesting than your ancestors," the old toad chuckled.

"I saw you fighting with a blurry figure in my dream. The conversation between you two made it seem like you knew each other. You even made him quite angry. Do you know this person?" the old toad asked him.

"...Sage, your question is a bit too general. I've angered hundreds, if not thousands, of people in the ninja world to death, and as for those I've angered... I'm not bragging, but apart from a few exceptions, I've angered almost everyone in the ninja world whose name you can think of." Shanks said, looking thoughtful.

He silently scoffed at the blurry figure, thinking, "Who else could it be but Madara? Even though Obito will eventually become the Ten-Tails' mother, I have a ton of Obito's embarrassing past, so he wouldn't dare mess with me. Only a smug genius like Madara would hold a grudge against me for so many years."

"..." The toads and Jiraiya fell silent, all agreeing that Shanks was right. With his mouth like that, there was no one in the ninja world who didn't hate him, except for those muscle-bound guys from the Cloud Ninja.

"Young man, if someone wanted to destroy this world, what would you do?" The old toad rarely opened his beady eyes to look at Shanks.

"...Isn't there a savior? The Chosen One that Jiraiya keeps nagging about. Wasn't he born to save the world? I'll just stand by and cheer him on with '666'." Shanks pretended to be silent for a moment and then shrugged.

"Heh! A very interesting idea. My dreams used to end the same way, but this time my dream has changed slightly. People who never appeared in my previous dreams have appeared." The old toad looked at Shanks.

"...You mean me, the person you're talking about?" Shanks asked, pointing at himself. Could it be that staying in this world long enough grants one Hokage citizenship? Did Kishimoto, the Great Emperor, draw him?

"That's right. It was because I dreamt of you fighting that blurry figure that I wanted to meet you and see if you could guess who that figure was, so I prepared in advance," the old toad said leisurely.

"...Actually, I think even if you guessed it, it wouldn't matter. Since you, the immortal, have already foreseen a great disaster in the future, even if you guessed who would be affected, what's meant to happen will still happen. There are a million possibilities in the future. Even if you deal with that person in advance, someone else will still take his place." Shanks shrugged.

He wouldn't be so foolish as to tell this old toad the plot. There are only a few future bosses; he already knows their skills, health, and weaknesses. Wouldn't it be better to just run an easy dungeon with plenty of experience? Why create unnecessary difficulty for himself and force Kishimoto to create a new dungeon with the same experience? Isn't that just a waste of time and internet fees?

"I didn't expect you to have such insights!" The old toad looked at Shanks with a slight surprise.

"Of course! I'm not bragging, but when it comes to predicting the future, no one in the ninja world, except you, Sage, has a deeper understanding than me. I'm a real man who can predict the future five seconds in advance!" Shanks was proud! It felt great to be able to brag to his brother, whose ancestors lived over a thousand years ago.

224. The Perfect Grand-Disciple Minato

"Kakashi! Can we skip the D-rank missions?" Obito arrived at Konoha Park early in the morning, looking pitifully at his rival. Now that he couldn't be a rival, if he could avoid taking D-rank missions, he'd treat him like royalty.

For the past three months, Obito has either been teaming up with Kakashi for D-rank missions, or the two of them have been doing D-rank missions together... Is there a difference? ...There is a difference; he gets less money by teaming up...

Brother Obito now feels nauseous at the mere sight of the letter D, even software described with D is unacceptable, since everything is related to D anyway.

"...We don't have a team leader, so we can only take on D-rank missions. Other team leaders won't take us out of the village either." Kakashi was actually about to throw up, but he had to crawl to the end of the path he had chosen.

As for the other ninja leading the teams, they wouldn't dare take them out of the village. First, they didn't have the authority; second, even if they did, they wouldn't dare! Let's leave Obito aside—he was just someone who accompanied the young master in his studies, so his death was no big deal. But Kakashi was different. His son, who had the Hokage's insignia on half his sleeve, would be subjected to constant harassment if anything happened to him.

"How about we find a teacher who's willing to take us out?" Obito asked Cardinal with a glint in his eye.

"...Those who aren't the teachers leading the team aren't allowed to take us out of the village on missions. Don't you know that?" Kadian shook his head and said.

"Didn't you do an A-level mission outside the village before? Why don't you just ask the vice principal to take us out again?" Obito looked at Card Master with envy.

That's an A-rank mission! Many people never get to do one in their entire lives. Take their homeroom teacher, Kame Saburo, for example. He was able to do an A-rank mission on his very first day. Having a powerful father is truly amazing.

"...No. He won't agree anyway, let's go." Kaden thought for a while and then shook his head, realizing that he shouldn't even think about asking that middle-aged man for help.

"Anyway, I'm not going to do any more D-rank missions. You can go yourself if you want. A genius like me won't waste my time on these menial tasks anymore," Obito said proudly.

"..." Kasper ignored him and walked straight to the mission room. "What kind of genius are you? You've been learning the Fireball Jutsu for a year and you're still just spewing black smoke."

"Huh? Kakashi, hello there!" Minato, who had just come out of the ninja tool shop, saw Kakashi walking towards him.

"Brother Minato," Kaden greeted him.

When Brother Obito saw the blond-haired man, his eyes lit up. "Isn't this the village's super genius? He'll definitely be able to lead us out of the village!"

"Lord Minato, Kakashi wants someone to take us out of the village on a mission! He said he's tired of D-rank missions!" From now on, if anyone says Obito is brainless, Kakashi will definitely fight them to the death. This is what you call brainless? He's even started shifting blame now! Kakashi glared fiercely at Obito.

"Haha! Is that so, Kakashi? How about... I ask the Hokage to let me take you out of the village? But I can only take you, my strength isn't enough to protect two people." Minato said with a smile.

Who is Minato? Obito, the sheep, wants to outwit the perfect ninja, but he's still a few Tobirama Senju away from achieving that. He can only make up for the gap after he evolves into Grey Wolf.

"...What?! With my strength, why would I need your protection!" Obito's mysterious confidence returned, but there was still some disappointment in his eyes.

"...Let's do the D mission instead." Kakashi hesitated for a while, but still didn't give up on Obito, this burden.

"Hehe! Just kidding. I'll go ask the Hokage right now. Please wait here for a moment!" Minato-kun never disappoints.

"Yay! It's Lord Minato!" Obito shouted excitedly upon hearing Minato's voice.

"No need to call me sir, just call me Minato." After saying that, Minato disappeared with a Flying Thunder God technique.

The next second, Minato appeared at the Hokage's office door and knocked.

"Come in," Hiruzen Sarutobi said to the doorway.

"Lord Hokage!" Minato greeted him politely as he entered.

"Hehe! Minato, what's the matter?" Hiruzen Sarutobi looked at his perfect grand-disciple and laughed.