Konoha Drunkard

"So, what's the situation with Kumogakure and Kirigakure?" Onoki asked Aoki Nozomi with a red nose in the Iwagakure camp on the Land of Earth battlefield.

"There's been no movement from either side, Tsuchikage-sama. Isn't this too dangerous?" Aoki Nozomi said, shaking his head.

"Let's wait and see. I don't believe those two villages won't be tempted." Onoki started tapping the table with his fingers again.

Big Cannon and the Raikage were right; Onoki, the Red-Nosed, was up to his old tricks again. However, he was seeking revenge for the First World War, so this time he deliberately led over 20,000 men to the battlefield in a high-profile manner, aiming to recoup some of his losses from the two villages. Little did Onoki know that the Raikage had already seen through his scheme. As for Kirigakure, if the Third Mizukage hadn't been controlled by Madara, given the nature of Kirigakure's higher-ups, they would probably have persuaded him to raid their base. Madara wouldn't even glance at the resources of the Land of Earth.

........

In the Konoha Hokage's office, the three giants of Konoha were discussing who should lead the team to support Hatake Sakumo. This morning, after receiving information about Hatake Sakumo, Sarutobi Hiruzen suddenly felt a toothache. "That shorty Onoki must have taken too many stimulant pills!" He jumped straight into the climax without any prelude.

"Who should lead the team this time? Sakumo is having too much trouble dealing with both the Four-Tails Jinchuriki and Onoki at the same time. I wonder how their Five-Tails Jinchuriki is doing. If they can control him perfectly, it'll be troublesome." Hiruzen Sarutobi tossed this question to his friend with a headache.

"...Currently, the village's top-tier combat power consists of you, Jiraiya, and Kushina. Zixiao counts as half, but Kushina is excluded, leaving only you and Jiraiya. However, Jiraiya will be going to the Land of Water battlefield to provide support, so he can't go. You also can't leave the village right now... Sigh!" Koharu Utatane shook her head after analyzing the situation. Konoha already had enough talented and strong individuals, but unfortunately, they still paled in comparison to the major villages.

“If we don’t have people from the village, what about people from outside the village? Couldn’t we have someone from the village?” Mitomon En, the soy sauce vendor, suddenly said.

"That's a good idea. I'll immediately notify Minato to go directly to the Land of Earth to provide support. Shinnosuke will lead the other five thousand men there." Hiruzen Sarutobi only remembered when his friend mentioned his perfect grand-disciple—wasn't his perfect grand-disciple the recently promoted Double Flower Red Rank Servant?! He'd almost forgotten. Having his eldest son, a Red Rank Servant, leading five thousand men was enough!

........

Minato's team had just arrived at the Konoha camp in the Land of Wind.

"Minato! What brings you here? Didn't the Hokage keep you hidden away like a treasure?" Nawaki saw his future cousin-in-law and three young boys as soon as he entered the camp.

"boom!"

"Minato came all this way for you. We're practically family now, so stop making sarcastic remarks." Tsunade looked at her good-for-nothing younger brother, then at her future cousin-in-law. The difference was just too damn huge! He was already a double-flowered red stick, while this brat was still sneaking around developing his skills.

"For me? What the hell? Sis, I've already killed almost five hundred!" Nawaki-kun was already getting cocky. Yesterday, he overheard two ninjas on guard duty talking, saying that he was currently the most deadly killer. He couldn't help but get cocky!

"If you can kill Jonin like they're nothing and get 500 kills, then I'll admit you're awesome," Orochimaru said, looking at his disciple who had humiliated him so much.

"I heard you killed too many people on the battlefield. The Hokage was worried you were in danger, so he asked me to bring you the Second Hokage's Thunder God Sword." Minato said, looking at Nawaki who had already floated into the air. As his future cousin-in-law, he couldn't very well say that Hiruzen Sarutobi was too damn annoying, so he could only express Hiruzen Sarutobi's meaning in a more tactful way.

"Holy shit!" After hearing Minato's words, Kakashi rarely swore. Minato wouldn't tell them the details of this mission, and they couldn't ask him. If he could tell them, he definitely would; if he couldn't, asking would be useless.

But when he heard that the mission was to deliver a divine artifact to Rope Tree, there was no way he could stay calm! This guy already has two divine artifacts! And now he's giving away another one? Did this guy save the world in his past life?!

"Haha! Thank you so much! I was worried that the Seven Star Sword would break if I used it too much!" Rope Tree accepted the Thunder God Sword without the slightest embarrassment, since the Thunder God Sword originally belonged to his second grandfather.

Tsunade stood by, looking completely nonchalant, which only made Kakashi more speechless. Thinking of his father's heirloom short sword... it didn't seem like a divine weapon at all, yet this guy already had three of them. He was treating his official robes like casual clothes.

"Minato, it seems you can't rest. My teacher sent me a message yesterday, asking you to go and support Sakumo immediately when you arrive, as his situation isn't good," Orochimaru said to Minato.

"What happened? Lord Sakumo should be able to handle the Tsuchikage, right?" Minato asked, patting Katakuri's head.

"Onoki has really gone overboard this time. He brought over 20,000 Iwa ninja, including the Four-Tails Jinchuriki. Sakumo will have a hard time dealing with both of them alone," Tsunade said seriously. Kakashi was genuinely surprised by Tsunade's words. Although he had a lot of confidence in his father, it would be strange if he wasn't worried about facing two powerful figures at once, one of whom was the Tsuchikage.

"Then I'll head over there right away. Lord Orochimaru, Lady Tsunade, farewell!" After hearing this, Minato immediately led the three students to the Land of Earth.

"Wow! Lord Sakumo is amazing! He fought against two powerful individuals all by himself, one a Jinchuriki and the other a Tsuchikage!" World Rin exclaimed after leaving the camp.

"The more powerful Sakumo-sama is, the more it proves how weak Kakashi is!" Obito can seize any opportunity to strike at his love rival.

"..." Kakashi wasn't in the mood for bickering with his friends anymore. His dad was powerful, that was true, but those two were powerful too, okay? He was worried sick. He didn't want to inherit the family business so early!

267. Little Itachi was also filmed.

"Kakashi, is the Thunder God Sword really that powerful? You were so excited yesterday!" Obito asked after Kakashi's mood had improved considerably the next day. Having teamed up with Kakashi for so many years, this was the first time he had ever seen Kakashi so excited that he even swore. He was even more excited than when he learned that his father was taking on two opponents at once.

"...The Thunder God Sword is the Second Hokage's sword, incredibly sharp and possessing powerful lightning release effects." Having a good father means you know more than others.

"Four countries! That's amazing!... But you don't need to get so excited!" Obito looked at his rival with disdain.

"........" Kadian didn't want to pay attention to him. What do you know? That guy already has two divine artifacts, and if you add the Thunder God's Sword, that makes three. That's more than an entire village of divine artifacts!

...........

"Itachi, have a sip. This is a limited-edition, expensive wine produced annually in the Land of Fire! Others can't even get their hands on it!" On the battlefield of the Land of Water, Shanks was luring Itachi to drink in the camp.

"Children shouldn't drink alcohol." Little Itachi, with an air of maturity, looked at Shanks unmoved. Did he really think I was an easy child to fool? I have several warehouses full of this limited-edition wine.

"Clan head Uchiha, aren't you usually too strict? You've made Itachi so precocious, it'll be hard for him to pick up girls later," Shanks complained when he saw Itachi unmoved by the temptation.

"As the successor of the Uchiha clan, one always has to lose a lot," said the second male lead's father.

“Let’s make a deal. You can have another son as your heir and let me raise this one! My Shanks’ family business isn’t small either,” Shanks said, raising an eyebrow at the second male lead’s father.

"puff!"

Everyone spat out the drinks they were drinking. They were eating, couldn't they be serious for once?

"..." The little cannon stared speechlessly at his father-in-law. People usually send their children into wealthy families to inherit their fortunes; he'd never seen anyone snatch someone from a wealthy family to inherit the family business. Besides...those were all his future wives' children, weren't they?!

"Lord Shanks still loves to joke. The matter of the successor isn't something I can decide alone. If Lord Shanks likes it, I'll have Itachi spend more time with you in the future." The second male lead's father was internally complaining, "Even if you like someone, you can't just steal them from me. Can't you have your own child?"

"Oh dear! How pitiful, all my billions in assets will now go to the Nara clan!" Shanks said sadly, pinching Itachi's cheek.

“…” The little rocket ignored his father-in-law’s words and continued drinking his wine; he was used to it.

"Itachi, your brother is so sad, come have a drink with him! I'll protect you, your old man won't dare to hit you!" Shanks was still not giving up and continued to entice little Itachi.

The second male lead's father's eyebrows twitched. If he let his son continue to stay with him, he would probably lose all his dignity as a father.

"...It's bad for children's health to drink alcohol," Little Itachi said seriously.

"Then you're wrong! I'm making you drink for your own good. Let me tell you, a long time ago in the ninja world there was a man who loved to drink. When he didn't drink, he was only at the level of a Jonin. But the more he drank, the stronger he became. He was one of the few men who had his own background music and could even unleash eighteen dragons! Do you know why?" Shanks started to fool Itachi. He really didn't believe that he couldn't even fool a little kid. What about Itachi? He was still a three-year-old brat.

"Does such a person really exist? Why is there no record of him in our family?" As expected of a little kid, his love for stories is the same in every world.

"That's because you haven't seen it yet. The ninja world has a history of over a thousand years, from top to bottom! A thousand years ago! If you don't believe me, ask my son-in-law. The Nara clan is known for its brilliant minds." Shanks gave the little rocket launcher a look!

"Do you want a girl or a fist the size of a sandbag...?"

"Ah! There really was such a person. Later, people analyzed that the reason he became more powerful the more he drank was because alcohol contains hypnotic components. Through self-hypnosis, he was able to unleash powerful potential. This is because he liked to drink, so he had a high alcohol tolerance. The more he drank, the higher the hypnotic level became, so the stronger the potential he unleashed." As expected of a genius who can write a million-word self-criticism, even his nonsense was logical and well-reasoned. Even Shanks believed it.

The people around him were the same; Xiao Xiaochun was even thinking about keeping a few bottles of alcohol handy so he could drink a few bottles before a fight.

"See! I didn't lie to you!" Shanks said, patting his head.

"..." Little Itachi glanced at his father.

"Don't look down on your old man, he's not the type to like studying. Come on, let's have a drink!" Shanks said without giving Itachi a chance to refuse, and took out a glass, filled it with wine, and pushed it in front of him.

"Drink up, little man, be more forthright!" Shanks ruffled his hair.

"Lord Shanks! There seems to be some noise outside!" Just as Itachi finished his drink, a ninja rushed in.

"Calm down, I'm right here! Don't panic, even if the sky falls, there are always tall people to hold it up!" Shanks took out his camera and snapped a picture of Itachi's drunken state.

"...Lord Shanks, I'm going out to check!" The second male lead's father looked at his son taking pictures with his pants down, revealing his little elephant trunk, and his eyebrows twitched.

"No need. Three of the Seven Swords of Kirigakure have arrived. One of them has good sensory abilities and knows I ran away." Shanks helped Itachi put on his pants and carefully put away the camera. This camera contains many secrets about future S-rank rogue ninjas or big bosses! In the future, a village-annihilation war might be triggered by a single camera.

"They ran away? No way! Are the Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist really that cowardly!" Inuzuka Tsuru complained, tossing a bone to the big husky next to him.

"Ha! Don't you even know who your teacher is! That little river that splits Kirigakure in two is still there! Sigh! It's too awesome, I'm helpless too!" Shanks looked up at the sky at a 45-degree angle and sighed, his imposing aura filling the camp for a long time.

..........

Eight hundred miles away from the Konoha camp, three figures ran desperately.

"Hey! Pufferfish Demon! Are you sure Konoha's Shanks is really in there?" a ninja carrying a large machete asked.

"There's no mistake, Samehada just trembled, and I almost lost control of him. The only person in Konoha who can make Samehada react like that is Shanks!" a fat man said as he ran.

"Hmph, are we going to go back like this? They'll laugh us to death!" said a masked ninja.

"Being laughed at to death is better than being hacked to death! You're so brave, go and rack up their kills yourself." The ninja carrying a large cleaver said, swallowing hard.

What a joke! He used to swim in that river in the village all the time when he was little, you know? I remember secretly watching older girls and boys playing games in the water back then!!

268. Fog Hidden Seven is a Fool

"Phew! We're finally back!" The three knives collapsed to the ground after returning to their stronghold.

"Hey! What's wrong with you guys? Did you get scared by those Konoha ninjas and your legs went weak?" a middle-aged man at the stronghold said sarcastically.

"Stop talking nonsense, quickly report to Lord Mizukage, the battlefield is on the Konoha Shanks' side!" the fat man said, lying on the ground. Having dragged his enormous body so far, he really wanted to lose weight at this moment!

"No way? Shouldn't that red-haired guy from Konoha be in the Land of Lightning drinking with the Raikage?" the other sword asked doubtfully.

"Who knows what happened! My Samehada went berserk as soon as I got within 300 miles of their camp!" the fat man said. At that moment, he could really feel the excitement coming from Samehada. The only thing that could excite Samehada was chakra, and it had to be the amount of chakra that a tailed beast could produce. There was no one in Konoha with that amount of chakra except for Kurama and Shanks.

"Haha! You're already this scared before you've even seen anyone, you big pufferfish, you're such a disgrace! Couldn't you be someone from another Whirlpool Clan?" the middle-aged man laughed.

"Alright...you four go and check it out. The three of us are tired from running, so we'll wait for you here." The ninja carrying the large cleaver rolled his eyes and said to the four of them.

"Yeah, did your legs go weak just from hearing their names?" the masked man chimed in, egging him on.

"Hmph! Meaningless encouragement! I'm going to see just how powerful the legendary Red-Haired Shanks of Konoha really are!" a ninja with a goatee said arrogantly.

"Ah! Have a safe trip!" The fat man waved to him.

"Take care!" said the masked man.

"Take care!" said the man carrying a large cleaver.

"I'll take care of your wife and kids!" said the middle-aged man.

"Is there anything else you haven't fulfilled?"

May you rest in peace!

......

"That's enough, you three! Those three are one thing, but you three don't dare go either? Tongcao Yeyanren, weren't you the one shouting the loudest just now?" The man with the goatee pointed at the middle-aged man who had just said he'd take care of his wife. "Does my wife need your help? I already told the neighbors next door to take care of her."

"...Uh! I'm not afraid of that Konoha Shanks, but he can't even burn through a Tailed Beast Ball... What can we do with our few broken swords? Give him a massage?" Kusanagi Yato found a reason that was somewhat convincing to himself.

"Same as above!"

"Same as above!"

"Same as above!"

The other three thought to themselves, "As expected, middle-aged people have more experience! They couldn't have come up with such an excuse."

"...Hmm! I've thought about it over and over, and what you said makes sense. Besides, we have no grudge against each other. If we go to find them, we might end up fighting and damaging the flowers and plants around us!" The man with the goatee said, pretending to be deep in thought, after listening to the long-winded speech of the man with the goatee.

"Tch!" Six people gave him the middle finger.

"Then what do we do? We've come all this way, we can't just go back like this, can we? What will happen to the reputation of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist?" asked one of the men carrying a large, combined sword.