Konoha Drunkard

"Boss! Print as many of the Onoki series as you can tonight, I'm rolling in money!" Shanks shouted as he entered, abandoning his transformation.

"Okay...okay! Don't worry, Lord Shanks!" The printing shop owner saw the red-haired man and the iconic three scars on his right eye snap out of his daze.

Shanks then visited three more printing shops. At 5:30 a.m., he returned to Iwagakure with hundreds of thousands of sets of the Onoki series. Seeing that it was still dark, he used his full Observation Haki to evade the Iwagakure ANBU sentries. He gave each household in Iwagakure a complete set of the Onoki series. This time, Shanks was giving them away!

"Damn it! Onoki, I'll give you a surprise tomorrow morning!" Shanks chuckled slyly before closing his eyes.

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Back in Konoha, the world was quiet. When I got back to my room, I saw that Haruko-sama was fast asleep, so I went to sleep in the guest room.

The next day, only Onoki and Aoki Nozomi were in the Tsuchikage's office in Iwagakure.

"Did Konoha's Red Hair go back?" Onoki asked Aoki.

"The report says he hasn't been seen since last night," Aoki Nozomi said, looking unwell. He hadn't slept all night, fearing that Konoha's Shanks might be up to something again. While he was still thinking about it, a complete set of Onoki's works fell from the roof in front of him.

On a whim, he picked it up to study it. As he looked into the depths, a surge of blood rushed to his head. Forget about Shanks for now, he went to rewind and practice his secret technique with his wife. If it weren't for the Anbu notifying him that Onoki was looking for him, he probably wouldn't have gotten up yet. If he had, he would have been floating around like a pair of floating objects.

"You look very tired. Didn't you sleep well last night?" Onoki noticed that his dark circles were almost drooping.

"Ah! I was worried all night about what other tricks this Konoha Shanks might have up his sleeve." Aoki Nozomi started to lie through his teeth.

"Hmph! What tricks can he still pull? Let him go back, forget about him!" Onoki felt a headache coming on when he thought of Shanks. He might not even be able to beat him in a fight. Just thinking about that punch that hit him on the head last time still hurt.

Aoki looked up at the sky. "No tricks? You're probably the only one in the whole village who didn't receive a gift from him."

Sure enough, a member of the Anbu appeared before them shortly after, trembling as he said, "Lord Tsuchikage, a large number of forbidden techniques have been discovered in the village... almost every household has a set!" When he received several reports from Anbu earlier that day, he didn't think it was a lot, since he had already collected almost all the books sold by Konoha's Red Hair yesterday. But when he went to the living room, he found a set of Onoki's series on his table. He was stunned. Although he really wanted to read them, after a series of indescribable internal struggles, he finally put his hands down. He then ordered his Anbu subordinates to investigate how many more copies were left in the village. What they found sent a chill down his spine—every household in the village had a set!

"What? A set? That damn bastard! Aoki, how do you plan to resolve this?" Onoki, upon hearing that it wasn't one copy per person but a set, practically wanted to rush over and kill that bastard. But then he remembered he was already gone, and couldn't bring himself to do it.

"Lord Tsuchikage, this matter is easy to resolve; we just need to retrieve the book. However, this Konoha Red-Haired Shanks is a different story. I didn't expect him to be so bored. I'm afraid he'll do it again, so I think we should notify Konoha that our Land of Earth should restrict Konoha Red-Haired Shanks from entering the country." Aoki Nozomi felt a chill run down his spine just thinking about that red-haired guy. He had only been in Iwagakure for a short time, yet he had already turned the village upside down.

Onoki thought about it for a long time. Aoki Nozomi was right. As long as Konoha Shanks was restricted from entering the Land of Earth's borders, unless he defected from Konoha, his entry into the Land of Earth would be considered an invasion.

Three days after Shanks returned to Konoha, the Tsuchikage Onoki informed Konoha that the Land of Earth was restricting entry for Shanks from Konoha, and that if Shanks appeared on the Land of Earth's territory again, it would be considered an illegal intrusion.

Upon receiving Onoki's report, Hiruzen Sarutobi was utterly dumbfounded. He'd only been gone for less than two months, and when he brought back a girl from the Uzumaki clan, he was overjoyed—the kid was over thirty, he thought she'd grown up. And now this mess had happened! He had no idea what heinous things he'd done in Iwagakure! This was the first time since the village's founding that someone had been restricted from entering during peacetime...

"Go and fetch Shanks for me!" Hiruzen Sarutobi said, rubbing his temples and looking out the window.

Since he didn't go to cancel his leave, Shanks was too lazy to go to school and act like a big shot, so he stayed home and lay in his grandfather chair basking in the sun.

"Lord Shanks, the Hokage is looking for you!" came the voice from behind.

"Damn it! We've only been back for two days, can't we even get a break?! Doesn't your Anbu have any talent? Where's Sakumo? Where's Shishou?" Shanks glared at the Anbu.

"Ahem, it seems the Hokage didn't ask you to go on a mission!" A large bead of cold sweat appeared on the back of the Anbu's forehead.

"That's good." Shanks said, then closed his eyes.

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"Old Hokage! What's wrong? I just got back and haven't even had two days of rest yet!" Shanks complained to Hiruzen Sarutobi.

Hiruzen Sarutobi stared intently at him. "What did you do in Iwagakure? Why are they restricting your entry?"

"What? Red-Nosed Restricts My Entry? That bastard! He's capable of doing this and he's afraid of being found out! It's just selling a few more Onoki series books on his turf! The Land of Fire has tons of Naruto series, and you haven't banned them!" Shanks roared.

Hiruzen Sarutobi nearly choked on the smoke after hearing this. He knew it! That bastard had definitely done something heinous in Iwagakure again. The Naruto series was just made up by someone else, how could he ban it? He knew about the Onoki series, it was based on real events!

"Don't be so reckless next time! Since they've restricted your entry, you should just stay in the village and be your vice principal." Hiruzen Sarutobi said to Shanks. He was really afraid that if he let him cause any more trouble, the Third World War would start. This bastard had no bottom line.

"Alright, alright! I'm not going to Iwagakure again. I've already been there, it's pointless. The girls aren't even as pretty as those from Sunagakure. And they're all just tablets." Shanks waved his hand.

"Ahem! Actually, there's another matter I called you here for. I want to promote Minato to Jonin. You used to be his homeroom teacher. What's your opinion?" Hiruzen Sarutobi asked.

"Isn't Jiraiya his teacher? Wouldn't it be better if you asked him? I'm just his homeroom teacher at school. If you ask me like this, Jiraiya will feel terrible," Shanks said.

"Ugh! Asking him is pointless. He's been hanging out with Nawaki ever since he came back, just wandering around Konoha all day." Hiruzen Sarutobi felt a surge of anger at the thought of that white-haired guy who was suspected of being his illegitimate son. He'd taught children from other villages for two years, and then completely ignored the disciples from his own village.

166. Big Mom's Stolen (Please Subscribe)

"Minato's strength is pretty good, but I think we should wait a year. It's not wartime yet, there's no need to rush him to become a Jonin." Shanks said, stroking his chin. He really is Kishimoto's favorite son; not only is his personality good, but his talent is also phenomenal. It's a year faster than "gambling, drugs, and prostitution," but remembering his promise to teach Minato the Flying Thunder God Technique, he decided to delay it for another year. He's too young, his personality isn't mature enough, and entering the dimension could easily lead to trouble; after all, he wasn't the one who transmigrated here.

"Then give him another year to reflect. You should go back and rest. You must be tired from this trip to Iwagakure." Hiruzen Sarutobi gave him a knowing look.

"..." Shanks ignored him. What a load of rubbish! You think everyone's like you? I didn't do anything.

.......

"Sakumo, don't move! Lift Kakashi up a bit! Yes, like that, three, two, one! Idiot! Done!" Shanks put away his camera and also took away the photo of Kakashi's exposed lower body. Sakumo, sitting opposite him, was speechless. Was it really necessary to make such a fuss over just letting his son pee?

Shanks has been back from Iwagakure for almost a year, and today he invited everyone from the Hatake clan out for a BBQ. Kakashi is also over a year old, and at this point, his face is still covered. Shanks took the opportunity to take a few more photos of Kakashi as a keepsake.

"Father, can't you be normal for once?" The Fourth Emperor's mother rolled her eyes from the side.

"No genius has a normal brain, that's what makes them geniuses! Do you understand? Look at Tsunade, Jiraiya, Orochimaru, none of them are normal." Shanks ruffled Big Mom's hair.

"I can't be bothered with you!" Big Mom surrounded Kakashi, glancing at him every now and then.

"Hey! Linlin! Lately, I keep seeing that lazy Shikamaru waiting for you at the school gate. Is he flirting with you?" Shanks thought about it more and more and more likely! He stared wide-eyed at Big Mom, the Yonko, and realized that he was really being flirted with by that little version of Shikamaru. Wasn't he the grandfather of that lazy Shikamaru?

"What flirting? Shikaku-nii just really likes my cooking!" Big Mom is almost turning into Hinata Hyuga.

Shanks looked up at the sky. It's over! Big Mom is out of the question, but there's a housewife. Smart men's flirting skills are indeed not simple. They start by catering to her interests, not as simple and crude as he is.

"I think Lu Jiu is quite good. Although he's a bit lazy, he's smart. Besides, he comes from a big family and is known for being afraid of his wife. Lingling won't suffer if she marries him!" said Lady Qingzi.

Even his future mother-in-law was won over. "That won't do. That lazybones' alcohol tolerance is even worse than his father's. He always cheats when he drinks. A man like that can't be trusted. Lingling, I'll pick a reliable one for you. How can the son-in-law of one of the Four Emperors, Red-Haired Shanks, not be able to hold his liquor? I'll be laughed to death if word gets out! It's a pity you came out too late; Minato has already been given to Kushina!" Shanks said, shaking his head.

"Are you looking for a son-in-law or a drinking buddy?!" Sakumo Hatake looked up at the sky.

"What?! Brother Shikaku didn't steal chickens at all. Last time you guys were drinking with the Cloud Ninja, they were already drunk but he kept drinking!" The Yonko's mother started defending her lover.

"My dear daughter, you're still young. It's fine for you to date now, but marriage is too early. But you mustn't suffer any losses! At most, you can only hold his hand; don't even think about anything more!" Shanks said.

"What nonsense are you talking about? Lingling is only nine years old, and Lu Jiu is only 16." Haruko-sama twisted his waist.

"That's what scares me! That lazybones is already 16 and still trying to seduce my daughter. Old bulls really do love young grass! His dad's the same." Shanks looked at Big Mom, whose head was already steaming, with a sigh. She'd swindled the Nara family out of so many gifts over the years, and now she'd given them all back, even losing his daughter in the process. Smart people are indeed terrifying; they never suffer losses.

"In the entire Hidden Leaf Village, I estimate that marrying Lingling into the Nara family is the best choice! At least it won't create any conflicts of interest," said Hatake Sakumo.

Shanks, after listening to Sakumo's words, stroked his chin and realized it was true. Aside from the smaller clans and commoners, among the major Konoha clans, the only marriage options for Linling were the Ino-Shika-Cho trio and the Hatake clan. The Uchiha and Hyuga clans? Forget about them! One's an overpowered protagonist, the other a deadpan character, though there's a possibility he might mutate the Tenseigan... Kakashi and Kurenai are engaged, the Akimichi clan is out of the running. As for Yamanaka and Nara, Shanks actually quite liked the scholarly young Yamanaka Inoichi, but he wasn't interested. So, Nara's lazybones would have to take his place; he's a staunch supporter of the Hokage faction and a strategist. There won't be any troublesome power struggles in Konoha after Shanks gets involved.

"But Linlin, can you handle that lazybones in that family?" Shanks asked Big Mom.

"..." Big Mom, who was holding Kakashi with smoke rising from her head, didn't hear what he said at all.

"Damn it! No way! I've been farming resources at the Nara clan's place every day for the past few years! I never expected that they would steal all my crystals when I wasn't looking!" Shanks shouted in grief and anger.

"What nonsense are you spouting now! Stop doing those weird things." Haruko-sama said helplessly. Marrying a giant baby is really a headache.

At night, the Nara clan, including large and small rocket launchers and a Nara tigress, are having dinner.

"Does Shanks know about your affair with his daughter?" Big Cannon asked. Lately, his son has been bringing Lingling home every day to learn to cook with his wife. He's not blind.

He neither approved nor disapproved; after all, the Nara clan always seemed to just marry a tigress and have children whenever they reached a certain age. However, this time, his son had flirted with Shanks' daughter, and thinking about all the gifts Shanks had tricked him out of over the years, he felt a strange sense of satisfaction. But the thought of Shanks' shameless nature gave him a headache; he hated trouble, and his son had gotten him into a huge mess!

"Well! I didn't tell him because I was afraid of the trouble, but he probably already knows. I go to school every day to wait for Lingling." The little rocket launcher said, still with that same mischievous look, but thinking about his teacher gave him a headache. He was afraid of Shanks' iron fist; who in the class hadn't been beaten up by him back in the day?

“I think Lingling is quite nice. She’s gentle, cute, and a great cook. She’s nothing like Lord Shanks. Son, don’t be afraid! Mom supports you!” Nara the tigress patted the little rocket’s shoulder.

"Sigh!" Big Cannon sighed, sensing that a big problem was on its way!

really!

The enemy has arrived on the battlefield!

The next day, as soon as Big Cannon arrived at the entrance of the Hokage Building, he saw a slovenly red-haired guy chatting with two guards. He knew trouble was brewing; this slovenly guy would never appear within ten meters of the Hokage Building unless there was a reason, especially not so early.

167. Making up for future losses (Please subscribe)

"Hahaha! Brother Lu Yi is here very early today!" Shanks said as he turned around upon seeing the giant rocket launcher.

"Well! It's rare for you to get up so early. What brings you to the Hokage Building?" the actor asked, puzzled.

"Haha, it's been a long time, so I came to catch up with you and also to talk about Shikaku's recent suspicious appearances at the Ninja Academy. As the vice principal of the Ninja Academy, his homeroom teacher, and his former team leader, I think it's necessary to talk to his parents about the psychological issues teenagers face during their growth, especially in the area of ​​relationships." Shanks laughed, his nose slightly sore. Big Mom, one of the Four Emperors, was gone just like that.

A giant rocket looking up at the sky! Trouble came so quickly, as expected. Why didn't you go find the women of the Nara family to talk to your parents? Why are you coming to me? "Well, this isn't a good place to discuss personal matters. Let's go somewhere else."

"Haha! No problem then, let's go to that newly opened Konoha Grand Restaurant tonight. I'll be going now, see you there tonight!" Shanks laughed and turned to leave. He had made up his mind! If he didn't get back the dowry he'd squandered on Big Mom within the next few years, he'd change his surname to Nara!

Looking at his retreating figure, Big Cannon thought, "Ugh! Lingling hasn't even married into the family yet, and I don't know how much this bastard will rip her off in the next few years." Just thinking about it gave me a headache!

After Shanks left the Hokage Building, he activated his Observation Haki and saw Minato and Kushina again, this time in Training Ground 3, cuddling up the plants and trees. Since Jiraiya returned and stopped leading the team—the "national father-in-law" is now the clan leader, what's the point of leading anyone?—Minato, aside from carrying out Hiruzen Sarutobi's missions, spends all his time with Kushina. Jiraiya, on the other hand, spends his days soaking on the roof of the bathhouse with Nawaki. Nawaki still only has eyes for the middle-aged woman who manages the Konoha Bookstore, a thought that gives Shanks a headache. If that woman could still have children, Shanks could accept it. The problem is, she's over fifty! The thought makes Shanks' scalp tingle.

Finally, they found Little Skyrocket in the card room of Konoha Park. He was lying in the card room, basking in the sun and hibernating. His two friends had been tricked into going somewhere else.

Shanks took out the deadwood, slung it over his shoulder, and charged into the card room, standing by the window and coldly staring at him. Little Cannonball suddenly felt a chill, opened his eyes, and saw his future father-in-law carrying a large knife, looking at him with a murderous gaze. His heart pounded with fear.

"Haha! Good morning, teacher! What brings you here?" Little Cannon laughed, trying to suppress his racing heart.

"You have time to go to school every day, so I have time to come over. What? You stole my crystal, and now you have nothing to say to your future father-in-law?" Shanks said, putting the withered tree down and slamming it on the ground. He then ran his hands over the hilt of the sword, as if trying to get a feel for it.

"Haha! Who would dare steal the teacher's things! The teacher is really joking!" The little firecracker's heart, which had just calmed down, started pounding wildly again.

"Who dares to steal? Besides your Nara family, who else would dare to steal? Aren't you going to give me an explanation?" Shanks gripped the hilt of the withered wood tightly and stared at him.

He looked up at the sky like a small cannon! He knew it would be like this. Don't be fooled by his future father-in-law's menacing appearance; he knew him well enough to know he'd been tricked by his father before coming. "What explanation does the teacher want? I'm not the clan leader yet!"

"Haha! That's exactly what I wanted to hear! You're the only person I have the most faith in in the entire Hidden Leaf Village!" Shanks immediately changed his expression, laughing as he patted the small-sized rocket launcher on the shoulder.

"...I knew it would turn out like this." The small-sized Skyrocket was speechless.

"It doesn't matter that you're not the clan leader now, this day will come! Now we can make a three-point agreement. First, while Lingling is still under 16, you can only hold hands at most. I don't think you have any objections, right?" Shanks touched the hilt of his sword again and asked the small-sized Skyrocket.

"...No objection." The little cannon rolled his eyes. Before he was 16, he wouldn't do it even if you asked him to! What kind of person do you take him for?

"The second one is simple. If you get married, you have to wait until you're 18 to have children. You know that having children too early can cause a lot of damage to a woman's body!" Shanks continued.

“That’s no problem either. Our clan rarely has children at a young age,” said the small-sized Sky Cannon, spreading his hands. Having children is so troublesome, he didn’t want to do it so early.

"I haven't thought of a third one yet. I'll add it when I come up with one. I really didn't realize that you Nara people all like older men dating younger women! Your father was like that, and so are you." Shanks raised an eyebrow at the little rocket launcher.

"...Maybe the younger ones aren't as troublesome," Little Skyrocket said, stroking his chin. Little Skyrocket was attracted to Big Mom's gentle nature, unlike his own mother who was quick to attack.

That evening, at the newly opened Konoha Grand Restaurant, Shanks invited everyone he knew, in addition to the four major figures of Konoha.

"Boss, I heard that if you spend a lot of money here, you can get a lifetime membership?" Shanks, along with Hatake Sakumo, the "gambling, prostitution and drug gang," Mitarashi Shishou, Yuhi Makoto, the big fat Akimichi Dingke, and Yamanaka Inu, were chatting with the owner of Konoha Grand Restaurant in a private room!

"Haha! Yes! Lord Shanks, once you spend over 100 million, you'll become a lifetime member and enjoy a 30% discount every time you come!" The shopkeeper was practically drooling as he looked at the group. These were all renowned powerhouses in the ninja world. If they came to eat here every day, he could recoup his investment in Konoha in just six months.

"Haha, get me one today. First, bring me thirty bottles of your most expensive wine. Don't bring the cheap ones. This place is full of people of status," Shanks laughed.