I, who advocate giving up, feel like a disqualified person

Squad leader? Who?

I took a closer look at the monitor Liu Yan was referring to: she had long black hair, styled in a long ponytail. She was about my height, and her dark eyes shone with the confidence of a top student. Her breasts were healthy, seemingly from regular exercise; even through her clothes, they felt firm and firm.

Ah...what am I thinking...

"Class monitor...is she good at sports? And what's her name?"

"Master, I really underestimated your habit of ignoring your classmates' names." Liu Yan covered his face, as if trying to calm down. "The class monitor is very athletic and is said to have a black belt in karate. I don't know if it's true, but I've already tasted the pain of being chopped by a knife..."

Looking at Liu Yan's solemn expression, I just want to say: Tell me your name before you feel sad, you bastard!

Later I finally found out the monitor's name. It turned out to be Lin Yi...

It seems that this squad leader is quite thoughtful. In this case, he doesn't need me anymore, right?

No, that's not the case... It seems that Lin Quanchuan doesn't have any special reaction. Besides, the girls around him only gathered around Lin Quanchuan because of Lin Yi. They are not reliable friends.

Besides, the class monitor is only trying to contact Rinsenkawa out of his duty as class monitor... This won't really help Rinsenkawa, so it's better for me to find a way to help Rinsenkawa myself.

..................

By the time we arrived at our destination, it was almost half past eleven, so after being told some precautions and the meeting time, we were free to move around.

"Liu Yan, although I feel a little sorry, I still want to leave you behind and chase after Lin Quanchuan."

"Well, leave me alone," Liu Yan patted my shoulder, "Just let it go, Master. I wish you success."

So, I quickly caught up with the group that Rinquanchuan was in. Sure enough, the class monitor had a lot of influence; there were quite a few people in the group, and they seemed to be preparing to eat first.

So, I thought about the most energy-saving and efficient way, which was to tell the squad leader my purpose directly.

Well, this is an opportunity. Just call the squad leader out alone.

As for the method, it is very simple. When they start eating, I can just find a reason to call the class monitor out. They are so clingy that they won't follow the class monitor out during the meal.

...............

"Captain, this is bad," I said, pretending to rush into the restaurant in a hurry, as planned. "Come with me!"

"Don't worry, Sheji-san," the class monitor stood up. "What happened? Sit down and talk slowly."

"No, it's too late, come and have a look." I performed so well that I began to admire my own acting skills.

The squad leader nodded and said to them, "I'll go take a look. You don't have to wait for me. Let's start eating first." Then he ran out of the store with me.

"What's the matter? Sheji-san?" the class monitor asked as he followed me.

I stopped at a street corner where there weren't too many people passing by and took a deep breath.

"Squad leader, what do you think of me?"

"Ah?" The squad leader looked confused.

"That is, how do you see me?" I explained further.

"Ah? Didn't you say there was something urgent?" The squad leader didn't answer, but asked me somewhat unhappily.

"There is something, and it's about the Rinsen River. So I want to ask you, what do you think of me? Do you trust me?"

"What do you want to do?" The squad leader looked at me and said, "Do you want to date Rinquanchuan?"

"It's not really a relationship. I just want to change the current situation of Rinsen River just like you do."

"Boring," the squad leader turned around and said, "This is what I have to do as a squad leader. Please don't bother with it." Then he was about to leave.

Tsk, we have to stop her.

I thought so.

So he quickly ran forward and tried to hold her back.

But I overlooked a detail: the squad leader had practiced this move before. Instinctively formed from long hours of practice, the squad leader turned around and kicked my right leg hard as I approached her.

"Ah! It hurts!" I couldn't help but scream and squatted down holding my legs. The squad leader quickly turned around and wanted to help me up: "Ah, I'm sorry, this is my instinctive reaction. Are you okay? We need to go to the doctor..."

"It's okay, listen to me," I said, grabbing her outstretched arm and biting my tongue. "Don't think this is just the squad leader's business. You're only doing this out of obligation at best. But the situation with Rinquanchuan can't be changed so easily. Forcing her to be surrounded by people whose true attitudes toward her are unknown might actually backfire."

"But what can you do?" His voice sounded a little anxious. Was he worried about me? Or was he worried about Rinquan River...

"Give me some time, I will slowly persuade her and help her integrate into your group a little bit." I looked into the monitor's eyes, "Can you trust me?"

"Why are you helping her?"

"Because I know that no matter how much people try to avoid others, it's impossible to completely avoid contact with others." A sharp pain in my right leg affected my thoughts a little. "So, in order to protect Rinquanchuan, I must convince her. She is very similar to my old self, but I know the consequences of this state of not contacting others. I can't let the same thing happen to Rinquanchuan. After all, I promised others to take care of her."

The monitor was silent for a while and asked me:

"what should I do?"

"Will you believe me?"

"Yes." The class monitor nodded solemnly. "You're right. I only care about Rinquanchuan-san out of obligation. After all, I have many other people to pay attention to. I can't treat one person specially like you do."

"Class monitor, you're actually pretty good..." I struggled to stand up. "I'm happy that you care about classmates that others don't care about, and that you understand me."

"Stop talking, let me help you check your leg injury..." He said as he was about to support me.

"No need, I can find it myself. You go back quickly. As long as you can gather on time, I will tell you what to do."

The squad leader seemed a little worried about me, but he didn't insist on helping me. Instead, he nodded:

"I'm sorry, I'll leave it to you then."

"Well, trust me."

As I watched the squad leader leave, I further considered my next course of action.

(To be continued)

Spending energy on others doesn't mean you're giving up your beliefs.

Episode 18 [Training] Spending energy for others doesn’t count as giving up your faith

I like being alone.

If I have to give a reason, it's because I can think deeply only when I'm alone.

Now, having briefly treated my leg injury, I was sitting in a cafe. The quietness of the place allowed me to think about my next move.

So, let’s begin, time to ask and answer your own questions.

Question: Will my next action contradict the giving up that I have upheld so far?

Answer: Without a doubt, it will go against the concept of giving up that I have always advocated.

Question: Will the next action consume a lot of energy or even cause harm to the body?

Answer: Judging from the current condition of your leg injury, it will harm your body. In addition, considering the long journey and mountain climbing, energy consumption is necessary.

Question: What benefits will I gain from helping Rinquanchuan?

Answer: There is no benefit.

Question: Do you want to give up Rin Hanekawa's commission?

Answer: I really want to, because it is just a verbal agreement and there is no actual benefit. At best, it is just an obligation between classmates. If I don’t fulfill it, it will only affect my reputation at most, but there will be no actual loss.

Question: How about temporarily not adhering to the renunciation advocated as we did the last few times?

Answer: No, the previous times were occasional situations where my emotions outweighed my rationality. This time, the action is ongoing, and I cannot deliberately not adhere to the principles of giving up that I advocate.

Question: Is there no other reason to continue helping Rinsenchuan?

Answer: Yes.

For future community life.

Rebuttal: Even if you give up the commission, Rinsen River will not change much, which will affect your future club or campus life.

Additional answer: Then, just consider it as a way for Rinquanchuan to better integrate into the group.

Rebuttal: If you hate fitting in, what right do you have to ask others to fit in? And is this really good for Rinquanchuan?

Additional answer: Let's consider it from Rinhanekawa's perspective. On the one hand, we need to fulfill Rinhanekawa's wish for Rinsenkawa to integrate into the group, and on the other hand, we need to ease the relationship between them.

Question: What is the reason for doing this?

Answer: First, if I complete Rin Hanekawa's commission, Rin Hanekawa will owe me a favor. Even though it is not needed now, it may be useful in the future.

Second, I am more interested in the reasons for the rift between them, and it would be worth it if it could satisfy my curiosity.

Third, the squad leader has handed the Rinquan River matter over to me. If I can complete it, it might be beneficial to me, although I don’t know what the benefit will be.

Fourth, a reason that is not a reason.

Because I think Rinquanchuan is worthy of my help.

When I first entered the class, she had physical contact with me without any scruples. Although she spoke harshly to me during communication, I felt that she was kind-hearted.

Fifth, a reason that is still not a reason

Rinquanchuan needs help.

Rinquanchuan, who had always been alone, must have been nervous inside when faced with the group activities he had to carry out, although he didn't show it.

If you've always been alone and suddenly find yourself surrounded by people you don't normally interact with, you'll be at a loss. Furthermore, the feeling of not fitting in with the people around you is incredibly uncomfortable.

.............

Okay, time for the final conclusion.

Continuing with the plan would drain my energy and injure my body; I wouldn't gain anything, and it would appear as a betrayal of what I'd always believed in: giving up.

However, Rinquangawa may gain a good memory; Rinhanekawa and the class monitor will find that they were not wrong about him; perhaps Rinquangawa's attitude towards people will improve.

Well, that's enough.

As someone who advocates giving up, it doesn't seem like a big deal to occasionally waste precious energy for others, right?

...............

【16:36】

Thirty-six minutes had passed since the gathering time, and the students began to set off for the hotel one after another.

However, at this time I was sitting patiently by the mountain road waiting, even though few people passed by me.

Come to think of it, the mountains don't seem to be independent, but rather clustered together as if with a sense of purpose. So, should we call these hills that are adjacent to each other "mountains"?

It's really strange. A mountain covered in green trees and shrouded in mist can look so different to different people. Famous mountains and the mountain I'm standing on right now are both mountains, but they're known and respected to different degrees.

It has been mentioned in articles by famous people. Does it become famous because certain cultures originated there? In this way, the fame of a mountain should still be measured by human standards.

Well, regardless of whether the mountain I’m on is famous or not, I still like it very much.

Although it was peak tourist season, apart from the group from our school who came to stay together, there were no other people visiting, so I enjoyed the quietness here. I also understand why some scholars who choose to retreat to seclusion often prefer to live in the mountains.

Being so far away from the hustle and bustle of the city, I was a little unaccustomed to the long periods of silence. The scenery around me seemed to be still, especially when I was sitting on the road and staring at the other mountains in the distance, it felt like the passage of time had slowed down.

Occasionally, a refreshing mountain breeze blew by, making me feel comfortable and I couldn't help thinking:

A cup of tea would be nice at this time.

However, this comfort is only temporary.

Because a slightly lonely and weak figure appeared on the mountain road that no one had passed by for a long time.

This is exactly what I have been looking forward to for a long time.

"Hey," I came out from the roadside and saw Rinquanchuan walking alone on the road.

When she saw me, a hint of surprise flashed in her eyes, but she still asked me coldly as usual:

"Oh my, what are you doing here, pervert?"

"Ah, that's right," I said to her, following the lines I'd prepared beforehand. "The squad leader and the others were worried about you, so they asked me to come pick you up."

Lin Quanchuan didn't say anything and walked past me silently, and I followed her.

"Let me help you carry your bag. You seem to be having difficulty walking." I said as I wanted to help her carry the backpack which looked a bit heavy as I didn't know what was in it.

"No thanks." Lin Quanchuan refused flatly.

"Really?" I was silent for a moment. "How do you feel about getting along with other people? A little uncomfortable, right?"