It's none of my business. I'm just a lunch box seller.

Do you remember what Angel said, "How many people can it kill?" In fact, it was not that Angel underestimated Xiang Cheng, but what Angel really looked down on was the laser sword.

Why a laser sword, and not a lightsaber or a beam saber?

Because this thing really is a laser sword, or it can be called a more rigorous and accurate name - non-aggressive melee laser weapon/chromatic skin!

That's right, it was learned from domestic games, and "Shunfeng Nuan" has played a particularly exemplary role. Since the beginning of October, the mall system of the competitive world has been selling many props with the suffix "Fantasy Skin" under the name of innovation.

In fact, regarding the application of weapon skins, the competitive world has developed the weapon transmogrification function a long time ago. For example, the shield that Boss Cheng gave to Rogers was transmogrified into a big pot lid before. But it is the first time that "illusion skins" that can only be used for transmogrification are sold publicly in the mall.

As for the various fantasy skins that appear in the [Limited Time Sale] section of the mall, they are nothing new. These weapon skins are the skins of special weapons or special armors that the contestants have seen, touched, and used in the competition, but they just can't take away or bring out of the competition.

For example, the Jedi Knight laser sword that Xiao Xiangcheng is optimistic about is the exclusive weapon of the NPC Jedi Knights in the Star Wars series of competition maps. But the contestants can only watch the Jedi Knights swing the lightsaber. Even if the Jedi Knights die, the contestants cannot use their exclusive weapons.

Therefore, this special weapon, which is commonly used by Jedi Knights and has nothing to do with "precious", has become a non-offensive melee laser weapon/chromatic skin that is "sold for a limited time" in the mall.

This thing can be equipped and can also be used to chop people. But if it is not projected, the laser sword is really just a large toy! You can chop people with the laser sword, and there are even "buzzing", "clicking" and flashing sound and light effects.

But the effect is limited to sound and light effects, because this thing has no attack power at all. Of course, if you are willing to spend 600Pt and throw the laser sword as a projectile to hit someone, it can hurt them. If the power is a little stronger, like Boss Makoto or Saitama, it is possible to kill someone by simply throwing it.

So what Xiao Xiangcheng wanted was really two expensive toys that couldn't kill people, but were beautiful. And Xiao Xiangcheng, who had nothing to do all day long and just poked at the terminal, knew this himself.

Otherwise, how could Boss Cheng agree to buy two for the little girl without even blinking an eye? Did he think that the last time Xiao Xiangcheng blew up the school was not a big enough incident?

There's no point in forcing a child to go the wrong way, okay!

Except for stupid parents.

As for the more precious fantasy skins, such as the Crucible, BFG, Frostmourne, Mind Control Scepter, Blood Scythe, and Computer Department Mooncake, they will no longer appear in the mall.

These can only be obtained in the form of competition rewards or raffle chests.

You can either play the game like crazy, and get a fantasy skin every 10 games, but the rarity is random. Or you can play the treasure chest game, and you will definitely get a fantasy skin in consecutive draws, and the rarity is also random.

Soon after, Xiao Xiangcheng, who had received the new toy, rushed to Angel with his sword and delivered a beautiful eight-sword flash. Angel, who was hit hard, clapped his hands repeatedly, indicating that Xiao Xiangcheng's special move had been practiced to perfection.

Only Orochimaru stood there stupidly, watching Angel being hit by the laser sword but not hurt at all. It was only then that Orochimaru understood the reason for the so-called "buying a laser sword".

Saitama was also standing there in a daze. He didn't quite understand why a simple barbecue meal for one person suddenly turned into a barbecue party with nearly 500 people participating.

Yes, when the barbecue party started, there were nearly 500 people gathered. If the people from World 28 were included, the number would probably exceed 500.

Fortunately, Saitama is not averse to crowds. On the contrary, he likes the feeling of other people interacting with him from time to time without disturbing his noisy and lively feeling.

But at this moment, a man dressed in a big bird doll costume, walking with the steps of a giant crane, but with a little timidity and hesitation, walked to the barbecue party that had blocked the entire road.

"Ah..." The uncle in the doll costume stretched out a hand from his chest and scratched his head, "Excuse me, how much do I need to pay to join the barbecue buffet?"

The boss said with great generosity: "Since you can come here, it means you are destined to attend this barbecue party! So it's free! Just sit down and eat, there is plenty of wine and meat, but no rice. Who the hell eats barbecue with rice? Can't afford meat, or what?"

The boss's words caused him to lose the Japanese and Korean markets instantly, but attracted great favor from the uncle in the doll costume. The uncle in the doll costume sat down in front of the barbecue grill with difficulty, but because the neck of the bird in the doll costume was too long, it was not only difficult for him to reach the mouth with his hands, but also caused his bird's head to be smoked by the rising smoke.

It gives people a feeling of...

The boss is preparing to bake the illusion of protecting animals.

"Why don't you take off your doll costume? Otherwise, I'm afraid someone will call the police and accuse me of killing endangered wildlife."

But the man in the doll costume stood up and apologized to the boss, saying, "I'm sorry, I can't take off this doll costume anymore."

"Growing on the body?"

The man in the doll costume nodded.

The boss asked again: "Don't you feel hot?"

"I'm used to it."

"Does that mean..." the boss asked curiously, "You've become a weirdo too?"

"Hehe...I think so...Hehe..."

At this time, Saitama, who noticed the situation here, also came over, and he recognized the identity of the uncle in the doll costume at a glance.

"You're the slow bird from Animal Empire, right? But why can't I watch this show recently? I really like the dark political jokes in it."

Uncle Slow Bird told Saitama: "The show was cancelled because it involved too many black jokes about ZZ topics and was ordered to stop broadcasting. Everyone in "Animal Empire", including the director and screenwriter, all the cast and crew, were fired.

I begged the TV station not to be so ruthless, at least to transfer us to other program groups to do odd jobs. But the station director revealed to us that our expulsion was the decision of the higher-ups. The higher-ups described "Animal Empire" as a cancer cell, and if it was not removed in time, the entire TV station would be implicated. So..."

"So you are unemployed now, right?" Saitama interrupted the uncle in the suit.

"Yes, I'm unemployed. Some time ago, I was able to get some flyer distribution jobs thanks to the popularity of Slow Bird. But recently, I have had less work, especially after the attack by Dragon-level monsters in B City and D City. Now, the work has become better."

The boss asked, "Then you become a weirdo?"

Uncle Slow Bird shook his head and said frankly: "I don't know. By the time I realized that I couldn't take off the doll costume, I had already become a weirdo."

Then the boss asked a profound and tricky question: "How do you poop and pee?"

When this question was asked, not only Uncle Slowbird fell silent, but even Saitama fell silent.

The boss also thought this question was too tricky, so he changed the question and asked: "Can you still eat and sleep like a normal person?"

"Eating is a bit laborious, but sleeping is no problem. Just lie on your side." After answering, Uncle Slow Bird also asked the question he was most concerned about: "Why is no one here afraid of weirdos? I have clearly exposed my identity."

"You didn't call for war or killing."

“No hostility was shown either.”

"Just come for a meal."

“It’s more lively with more people!”

"You don't mind grilled chicken wings, do you?"

"Come on, come on! The pork belly is roasting and oozing with oil!"

"Put it down! I roasted that big kebab of lamb!"

"Hey, why don't you grill another one yourself?"

But even Saitama, a local, didn't know that this creature, which has always been called "slow bird" on TV shows and looks stupid, is actually neither a giant crane nor a shoebill, nor a slow bird in the setting of "Animal Empire".

It’s the Phoenix, the immortal bird in mythology that can be reborn from the ashes!

In the series setting, Slow Bird often encounters various fatal dangers because of his clumsiness, and he always dies in this episode. However, when the next episode starts, this guy will definitely appear next to the protagonist, as if he was not the one who died in the previous episode.

Then, this slow-witted bird uncle, who had not received care for a long time, suddenly met the boss and his gang who did not discriminate against weirdos. So he suddenly got excited and soared into the sky.

But because the boss and his men made too much noise in the quarantine area of ​​City Z, City Z had to ask the military to provide aerial reconnaissance. So the slow bird that soared into the sky happened to be hit by a fighter jet that came to reconnaissance, and the whole "bird" was cut in half by the wing of the fighter jet.

The pilot flew away crookedly in a fighter plane with a damaged wing, leaving a trail of black smoke. The slow bird that was hit in two fell to the ground with two "clacks".

"Hey, Saitama. He's not going to just... die, is he?"

"Probably dead."

"Do you think it's possible for a miracle of life to suddenly appear?"

Saitama turned his head and glanced at the boss, then said "Oh" and said, "Then let's wait a little longer."

hold on……

Just wait a little longer.

Then the miracle of life happened to the slow-witted bird that was broken into two pieces!

0409 It’s not easy for a weirdo to live

"In fact, he often does things like this that make people feel baffled during his show."

"And then?" the boss asked Saitama.

"Then kill yourself and resurrect in the next episode."

"Do you think it's possible for a miracle of life to suddenly appear?"

Saitama turned his head and glanced at the boss, then said "Oh" and said, "Then let's wait a little longer."

hold on……

Just wait a little longer.

Then the miracle of life happened to the slow-witted bird that was broken into two pieces!

"call!"

Two flames that wrapped around Uncle Slowbird's body suddenly shot up into the sky. The flames became brighter and brighter, until they were so bright that everyone had to raise their hands to block out the light.

But at the moment when everyone raised their hands, the two halves of the body that were broken by the fighter suddenly disappeared, and at the same time a tall and strong figure walked out of the flames.

Saitama glanced at the boss' bald head, then looked at the tall, handsome and stylish man who had just emerged from the flames, and began to complain: "Why did he become more handsome when he became stronger, but the two of us became bald?"

"My friend, your question is heartbreaking."

"Does becoming stronger require sacrificing my hair as a price?"

The boss shook his head and said, "I don't know, and I don't care."

After that, the boss took out a hedgehog-style wig from the battle warehouse, and put it on his head in front of Saitama. After putting it on, he did not forget to ask Saitama: "Can you see if my wig is crooked?"

Saitama: (?_?)

The Slow Bird, who was reborn and looked a little more human, has not yet figured out what was happening to him.

Saitama looked at the furry uncle, Slow Bird, and told him unhappily, "Congratulations, you are just like the Slow Bird in Animal Empire, you died and were resurrected."

Boss Cheng also echoed: "Yes, yes, not only has he been resurrected, but he has also become more handsome."

After that, Boss Cheng created a mirror space to replace the mirror and let Uncle Slow Bird look at his current appearance. After looking in the mirror, Uncle Slow Bird finally understood what "becoming handsome" meant. Rather than saying that he is now Slow Bird, it is better to call him the name in the original design of "Animal Empire" - Phoenix!

It was at this time that the Berserker Armor on Boss Cheng suddenly spread out, and on the boss' body it turned into the appearance of Phoenix Ikki's sacred cloth in the Bronze Five. The meaning of the Berserker Armor is very simple, it feels slow bird... Uncle Phoenix's appearance is exactly the same as the Phoenix in Saint Seiya.

But the boss pointed out that the wings of the Phoenix Cloth are too small, and that the Bennu Cloth of Hades Starfire is more similar in appearance to Uncle Phoenix.

Later, the Berserker Armor changed its appearance to resemble the Bennu Bird's Death Robe, except that the color changed from the original purple-black to the dark red and black that the Berserker Armor is more familiar with.

All in all, being handsome is the end of it.

After Boss Cheng finished showing off his Berserker Armor, Uncle Phoenix also accepted the fact that he had become stronger and more handsome. Moreover, because he had become a humanoid, although when he sat on the small stool, his huge and flaming wings would drag on the ground. But with his current appearance, at least he no longer had to worry about eating.

Then, the barbecue lasted from 1: pm to : am. They drank hundreds of cases of beer and ate nearly a ton of meat. After the boss and his team finished serving dinner at the restaurant, they came back to continue eating with the group.

It just so happened that the next day was Sunday, and the boss's restaurant was closed. And the quarantine area of ​​City Z in the world on the 30th did not have to worry about disturbing the public, so this barbecue party was able to proceed in this way.

Of course, the barbecue party was not smooth sailing throughout, and there were some minor setbacks. For example, seven or eight wolf-level monsters hiding in the quarantine area came over in a group to teach the barbecue goers a lesson because they thought the barbecue party was too noisy.

But...

As for the personnel configuration and combat capability of the barbecue meeting...

In terms of momentum alone, they were suppressed by a group of former TOP10. So, based on the principle of joining if you can't beat them, a few wolf-level monsters who could still be seen in human form shamelessly used a barbecue stove and ate with a large group of people until after a.m.

After they finished eating, they didn't leave immediately, but stayed to help pick up the garbage and clean the streets. They also chatted with the boss while cleaning. It was through the introduction of several tiger-level monsters that Boss Cheng learned that there were actually thousands of monsters hiding in the quarantine area of ​​Z City.

"We don't want to become weird!"

"When we were still human, we almost couldn't survive. After we became monsters, we couldn't survive at all."

"I couldn't find a job, and I didn't want to rob. Every day I could only go outside the quarantine area in the middle of the night to look through the trash cans to find food discarded by shops and restaurants that day."

"We know very well that with our strength, even if we go out and make a scene, we will only act as heroes."

"Although we are not human, we don't want to die yet. So we can only hide in the quarantine area and avoid contact with humans."

"If you guys hadn't been making so much noise here tonight...we haven't had such delicious barbecue for a long time."

“Thank you for the hospitality, boss!”

"Yes, thank you for the treat, boss!"

The boss compressed the collected garbage into a large ball until it spontaneously combusted and burned without leaving any ash. Then he stopped and sighed, "Hey, you guys are really rare."

Although several wolf-level monsters had previously realized that Boss Cheng had the ability to kill them instantly, they had never thought that the other party could not only kill them instantly, but also kill them without leaving any trace.

However, after hearing the boss's sigh, a few weirdos also sighed and said, "Who made us weirdos? We don't look like humans anymore."

After hearing the inner thoughts of these "weak" wolf-level monsters, the people in Project Team 30 who were cleaning together couldn't help but fall into deep thought. Before they met these monsters, they thought that all monsters were bad and should be eliminated. But after being in contact with these monsters for a whole night, they found that these people just lost their human appearance because of their own obsessions.

The cold-blooded fish killer became a weirdo all of a sudden just because he killed too many fish in the supermarket and one day his finger was cut by fish scales.

The devil barber was bullied by customers again and again, and ended up turning into "Edward Scissorhands" after getting drunk.