Longmen Memoirs

Chen Mo put his hand on his chest. There was a string of codes printed underneath through his clothes. That was the code name he first got.

13 number.

The lesions on his body began to attack again, and the last blocker had been used up at the border of Leitania. He thought that there would be many enemies waiting for him on the border to break out of the siege, but the result was disappointing and fortunate. .

Chen Mo leaned against a tree.

The stinging sensation along with the high fever and inflammation put his brain in a trance, and the voices of Sakaz gathered in his mind again, screaming piercingly, asking him to kill the traitor they hated.

Chen Mo ignored it.

After a while, the voice finally calmed down, and he looked at the black figure standing in front of him in surprise.

"Finally willing to come out?" he asked.

He lowered his gaze and calmly looked down at Chen Mo, who was leaning against the tree, with some pity, confusion and no argument.

"Do you regret it?"

"I broke my promise, I can't give you this body yet."

"It doesn't matter." He shook his head: "Sooner or later, it's not too hard to wait."

"..."

"Those voices, what are they?"

"Sakaz, Sakaz's hatred for millions of years, their unwillingness and despair, the humiliation and resentment they suffered." He said: "The sufferings endured by the demon kings of the past generations, you did not get the kingship but you must inherit the crown for it. price."

"Sounds great."

"But it's not worth it," He said. "The Demon King is a valuable partner, but she does not deserve your love for her, and no one deserves everything we have paid for her."

"It's me, not you."

"Ah, it's you." He squatted down and stared into Chen Mo's eyes: "After all, you are the owner of this body, but can you escape yourself? How long can you last? Watchdog, doomed not to There will be an ending you want.”

Chapter 35 Dogs

[One day, I will die, and all the hardships and ups and downs along the way will lie at my feet.

One day, we will become our own monarchs and cut off the blood of destiny with our own hands, and the earth and the stars will come to witness our deeds.

For thousands of years, through the vicissitudes of the world, only I and death are eternal, but the price is endless waiting and loneliness. 】

------

The stinging pain caused by the onset of the Origin Stone lesions is gradually fading away, replaced by fatigue and heaviness in the body and consciousness.

He didn't know when he disappeared in front of Chen Mo, along with the voices arguing endlessly in his mind.

A rare moment of peace and respite.

The physical pain is not unbearable, but what is difficult is the emptiness and cowardice in my heart. It cannot be avoided or escaped, like a scab that will tear with a little force and bleed.

There are too many scars in Chen Mo's heart that cannot be completely healed. The stories that have happened are hidden deep in his heart. However, Goudan's existence seems to remind him time and time again, reminding him that he should not forget those things that he should not forget. What he forgot was that for more than ten years, his scars had been dug over and torn apart.

How long can he hold on?

How many more fruitless disappointments could he continue to endure?

Perhaps death is the best relief, redemption and mercy for him.

Maybe he should have left this world more than ten years ago.

Maybe Wei Yanwu was right. His life would be a scourge to everyone, an unpredictable disaster.

After his death, the source of those disasters disappeared.

Chen Mo would inevitably come up with this idea at the moment when his will was weakest.

On the verge of death.

I am in my early twenties, a young person who should be full of enthusiasm and have great potential. I yearn for the innocence and vitality of young people.

But he was already terminally ill. There was no cure and he was exhausted both physically and mentally.

Should he not be the enemy of fate, should he return his body to the person who belongs to him, and go to meet his original destiny?

However, he was still a little reluctant to give up, a little...unwilling.

A slight noise suddenly sounded at this moment.

Chen Mo suddenly pulled out the black gun, and a black beast jumped out from the muzzle and dived into the depths of the night.

The muzzle of his gun moved downward.

The figure of Texas appeared in Chen Mo's sight from behind the trees.

They looked at each other, Texas looked at his hanging gun, their eyes met, and no one spoke.

Texas' eyes fell on his gun, and then moved up. The familiar face dripping with cold sweat, and the white hair on Chen Mo's temples were even more conspicuous.

The cold wind blew through the night, and Texas' gray-black hair fluttered gently in the wind.

"You saw it all."

After a while, Chen Mo opened his mouth to break the dull atmosphere.

"Ah."

"Didn't scare you?"

"Fortunately."

"...I am an infected person."

"understood."

"The symptoms are very serious, and it might turn into an exploding rock at any time." He was half-joking, looking at Texas a few steps away: "Aren't you afraid?"

Texas nodded, then shook his head.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm used to it," she said.

"Oh, I forgot that your previous partner was also an infected person. What was her name?" Chen Mo thought of the white wolf.

"Yes, Lapland, you are really unlucky, Texas." Chen Mo released his grip on the handle of the gun and placed the gun next to him.

Texas didn't answer.

She came over, knelt down, and put her hand on Chen Mo's forehead.

"It's hot. You're running a fever."

"It's just a complication. Just rest for a while."

"Put the blocker in the car...I'll get it for you." Texas retracted his hand and stood up, looking a little hurried.

"It's useless. It's been used up a long time ago." Chen Mo took Texas's hand, Texas stopped moving, and she couldn't look back: "You should be able to guess."

"…on the night we crossed Letania?" Texas asked, lowering her hands.

"The last one, I don't blame you. With my situation, this day will come sooner or later even without you." Chen Mo said, he saw Texas turning his head again, silent, and the animal ears on his head collapsed.

"Just rest for a while, or you can talk to me." Chen Mo looked at Texas: "Don't feel sorry, and don't feel like you are dragging me down."

"I didn't think so."

"Okay." Chen Mo sighed, and he was quiet for a few seconds: "I'm sorry, maybe I should have told you earlier and made you encounter the same thing again."

"The same will be given back to you."

Texas shook her head. She sat down next to Chen Mo, shoulder to shoulder. The late night in Ursus still made people feel cold.

But it was very quiet at night, a rare peace for people like them. It seemed that all the sounds and noises had disappeared. The world only belonged to them at this moment, and no one could catch up with them.

"So you just said that you can't wait any longer?"

Texas hugged her legs and she leaned against the tree next to Chen Mo and asked.

"..."

"A lot of things happened in my past, a lot of unbelievable experiences that even ordinary people can't imagine in their lifetime, not just one or two, but too many to count. In my former hometown, there is a saying for these things called retribution." Chen Mo said: "I think this is my retribution, because I was not forced to do evil, but took the initiative to do those things myself."

"I used to run away from it, Texas. I tried to exclude people who were familiar with me within the scope of what I could predict, and tried my best to give them a decent outcome."

Chen Mo said: "I don't think fate is something that cannot be changed. Even if your own destiny cannot be changed, others can. When you become a part of other people's lives, you can try to rewrite their lives."

"You did it?" Texas asked.

"I don't know if it can be considered accomplished." Chen Mo closed his eyes and replied: "Maybe, Texas, maybe."

Maybe I changed Kazdale's original fate, maybe I also changed Chen's fate, Vina's fate, maybe my appearance is not a meaningless passerby, but maybe, these are just the branches of their fate. A small part of it, a result of it, they would have been like this even without my presence.

Chen Mo couldn't tell clearly, he would rather believe the former.

"You also changed my destiny?" Texas suddenly asked, his tone was very calm, as if he was saying hello.

"But that's also very selfish." Chen Mo replied: "It is a selfish thing to interfere in other people's lives at will, no matter the outcome is good or bad. Don't expect anyone to come and save you. In Texas, everyone has to do it themselves. Save yourself. If you want to live, you must get up from the ground. Life is very precious and very cheap, so you must live, because you only have one life, and you must hold your life in your own hands."

"If you know that, why do you do it?"

"Because I know that I am selfish." Chen Mo said slowly, "Selfish people should do selfish things as a matter of course."

"I don't think so." Texas tilted his head and looked at Chen Mo's profile.

"How to say?"

"Really selfish people will not interfere in other people's lives. They will choose to stand by and live alone, and they are not like you now." Texas replied: "In my opinion, you are not selfish, snake, you are just too conceited. .”

"conceited?"

Chen Mo turned to look at Texas in surprise, but Texas did not look away.

"You are the first to do this [#-

"But it won't be the last," Texas replied, sure of it.

When those amber eyes looked over, in the dim night, it was difficult to see the emotions in her eyes.

Chen Mo missed Texas' gaze.

He leaned his head against the tree.

A lot of memories flooded into his mind, and those memories were messy. There were strange and familiar faces in those memories, and in the end, only a blank was left.

The snowy fields of Ursus in the blank, the high pitch black wall, and the tall but already blurry figure.

Chen Mo couldn't even remember his name.

He said it, but Chen Mo forgot it. He also forgot a lot. What he had lost, what he had gained, what he might lose, what he thought he had gained.

"Perhaps you are right, Texas, I am a conceited... overly conceited person." Chen Mo replied softly, with a faint warmth coming from his side, separated by his clothes and the coldness of the night.

"But in Texas, people rarely have the opportunity to make a new choice."

I was arrogant and thought I could escape from the black wall on my own. I was too arrogant and thought I didn't need anyone's mercy and mercy.

Ridiculous pity and kindness, weakness and kindness.

I was too conceited and ignored these things, thinking that I could face it alone. I was conceited and even thought that I could abandon the past, that I could have nothing to do with Longmen from now on, that I could distinguish right from wrong, clear up my grudges, and be frank and frank. , no more care and nostalgia.

My ego comes from selfishness, and selfishness creates my ego.

Ever since I left the Black Wall, no, maybe earlier, ever since I was in Longmen, I had naively thought that I could control my own destiny with the mature soul in my body and the knowledge from a certain world.

Isn’t the result already clear?

As a result, for more than ten years, I have been doing nothing and accomplishing nothing.

Just like his name, Chen Mo fell silent, and Texas didn't speak again. His slight breathing proved that the Luper he met halfway was still by his side.

The funny thing is that more than ten years have passed, and so many things have happened along the way, but now he is accompanied by a strange Luper, a Syracusan whom he has known for only a month.

What does Texas know about him? What does Texas know about this infected person called Snake? How did he end up in this situation? How many unknown joys, sorrows, sorrows, powerlessness and happiness are hidden under his pretense of absurdity? have no choice.

Texas knows nothing.

She just looked at the snake from her perspective and her thoughts, and coincidentally, her comments were so apt and cruel.