Longmen Memoirs

"Nothing, I'm asking Mr. Chen Mo about his experience over the years. Is the meeting over?"

"It's over." Tallulah sat down beside Alina's bed and looked at Alina who had taken care of her injury: "What did the medic say?"

"Just rest for a few days and it will be fine. There will be no problem, and I no longer have any pain."

"Really?"

Alina raised her hand and waved it, but she put it down due to pain.

"Well……"

"nonsense."

"I don't want you to worry, but I'm afraid the education team won't work."

"As long as you're fine, that can happen anytime."

Alina looked at Tallulah sitting by the bed and Chen Mo beside her, and her eyes fell on them.

"That's great." She said suddenly. "Tallulah, you always said that you always hurt others, but it's not like that. Now you finally met a good thing."

Tallulah was stunned for a moment. She turned her head and looked at Chen Mo.

"How long do you want to stay here with me? Tallulah, hurry up and leave. You must have a lot to say, don't you? Don't say it here, I am not happy to hear it." Alina suddenly urged: " Don’t think that I don’t know why you came here in such a hurry.”

"Well..." Tallulah was at a loss for words for a moment. She wanted to say something, but looking at Alina's eyes that I knew everything about, Tallulah's words were stuck in her mouth.

"And do you still plan to let Mr. Chen Mo stand here with you all the time?"

Tallulah hesitated for a moment, then she slowly stood up.

"Then I'll see you tomorrow."

"Well, I won't disappear suddenly. Go quickly." Alina said, looking at Chen Mo walking towards the door, she suddenly called out Chen Mo's name.

"Mr. Chen Mo..."

Chen Mo turned around and Alina smiled.

"I'll give it back to you Tallulah."

Chapter 8 Night Talk in the Snowfield ([-]): Dilemma

In Bai Lu's voice, Tallulah pulled Chen Mo out of the house with a slight haste.

Alina, who was watching all this, closed the door gently, and the smile on her lips slowly fell silent.

She sighed softly.

Because he knows what Tallulah wants to do, there may be no results between these two people who have not seen each other for a long time. It is easy for people on this land to have differences. Maybe it is just a small misunderstanding. Friends will turn against each other.

Later, Tallulah always thought about this time easily.

Thinking of myself at that time.

She thought, if she had explained everything clearly when she met him at the beginning, if she had not had any extravagant expectations that she shouldn't have, wouldn't so many things that would have happened later that made people hesitate and have no way to retreat? choice.

Heavy snow fell from the black sky. Several fires rose in the infected camp. Someone could be vaguely seen walking by. The snow made no sound when stepping on the soft snow, but the wind blew the snowflakes. The sound of "whirring" rang in the ears, as if reminding the people under the heavy snow of the coldness of this winter.

But Chen Mo didn't feel any cold.

Tallulah's breath left a prominent line of heat in the cold air. Because alive, blood is warm, so Tallulah's hands were warmer than Chen Mo imagined, but not as delicate as a girl of this age should be.

Perhaps Chen Mo had long forgotten how the girl's warmth beside him made him feel, just like she had forgotten many memories that were no longer in contact and gradually became blurred with the passage of time.

The infected camp is a small abandoned village. At night, you can vaguely see the shadows of the simple houses within the scope of the firelight. The soldiers standing in the snow may not be called soldiers. They have no armor. There is no equipment that any warrior should have, and their composition is chaotic. They are just ordinary people who pick up weapons and step onto the battlefield after simple training.

In fact, everyone was an ordinary person at the beginning, but gradually they were divided into many professions and titles because they took different paths.

But this is all Tallulah has now.

A simple village, a group of simple armed personnel, and a few supplies that can only be obtained by trading with the village maintain the current survival of this poor stronghold.

Even the Tower of Babel during Kazdaele's exile was countless times better than here. They couldn't even tell how many infected people in the camp sincerely wanted to stay and how many had no way out. So I had to take shelter here.

They join a group for warmth. They nominally share the same philosophy. However, their internal structure is complex, their system is fragile and difficult, and what keeps them together is just the name of an infected person, and nothing else.

Chen Mo suddenly thought of Longmen.

No matter how cold and desolate the city is, Tallulah there would not be able to live such a life, but Chen Mo thought that if he had to choose between the two lives, the girl next to him would probably choose the latter. By.

He looked at Tallulah's slightly thin side face. Her side face had a visible tenacity in her eyes. Facing the falling wind and snow, Chen Mo felt that her eyebrows were flying, like a bird that broke out of its cage and finally touched it. Arriving at the sky that should have belonged to her dreams.

Tallulah's hurried pace finally slowed down.

She noticed Chen Mo's gaze, but she held Chen Mo's right hand tightly without any intention of letting go.

"...Has Alina told you about what I'm doing now?"

"I want more people to live, so that the infected people in this land of Ursus can have a land to survive. He... we have not done anything wrong and should not accept this kind of life."

"But that's not easy."

"I know it's not easy." Tallulah said: "I also know how difficult the situation we will face in the future if we are going against Ursus, but I still have to tell you, I must tell you, if you want to stay Come down, I have to let you know what is going to happen next.”

She turned her head and glanced at Chen Mo, then looked in another direction. A bonfire was burning in that direction. Several soldiers were gathered around the bonfire. They seemed to be chatting about something in the cold and windy snowy night.

Can't really hear it here.

The wind has calmed down a lot, but the snow is still falling.

"Is that what you say to everyone who comes here?"

"You're different from them."

"It's no different, Xiaota. I am also an infected person. In the eyes of this land, there is no difference between the way they treat them and the way they treat me. I am the same as the people here."

"I'm not stupid, you know what I mean, you're a liar."

"...You think I'm going to leave because of this."

"Maybe not now..."

"Never again." Chen Mo said.

Tallulah turned back and stared into Chen Mo's eyes. She pursed her lips slightly and spoke softly.

"Who can say clearly what will happen in the future." She said: "Maybe you have been gone for too long. Just when I thought you would never appear again, you suddenly appeared in front of me. Although you didn't say But I can see that you stay here not because of the infected, but because of me, and you stay here because of me. This is actually not what you want."

"..."

The Tallulah in front of him made Chen Mo feel worried about gain and loss, just like when he was a child in the orphanage. It was also winter. The man brought Chen to the orphanage. Tallulah staring at them on the second floor was exactly the same as now.

Maybe it has indeed been too long, so long that some memories have become fragments, and it has been so long that if you don't try hard to recall the memories that have become fragments, it will be difficult to recall even the slightest trace.

Chen Mo no longer remembers what he did or said at that time.

Time has changed him, and time has also changed Tallulah. If people in this world care too much about each other, they will not be as light and familiar as ordinary people when they meet again after a long separation.

"But it doesn't make any difference, Little Tower."

Chen Mo said.

"If I have to find a reason, it doesn't make any difference to me whether it's for you or for the infected. Now that I've found you, I can't leave you here anymore, even if it's like you said. , we may have to face the entire Ursus in the future."

Tallulah took a deep look at Chen Mo.

"...Liar."

She squeezed Chen Mo's hand.

"I thought you wanted me to answer you this way."

"I would rather you tell me the truth."

"I'm afraid it will be difficult."

"I know too." Tallulah said: "It's like a dream. If I wake up from this dream, will you suddenly disappear again? Then I would rather never meet you again."

"That's not what a leader would say, Tallulah."

"I never wanted to be their leader."

"But they see you this way, they want you to be, you are."

Chen Mo said.

"Tell me about this place, Tallulah, I [~

"Actually, it's not much. What you see is all."

"You came here after leaving the duchy?"

"No, I met Alina's village first. At that time, I just left the duchy in a daze and didn't know where I would go next. An old couple in the village took me in, and they regarded me as their daughter. , that was my most peaceful time. Unfortunately, later, the infected pickets found our village. For my sake, the old man voluntarily admitted his identity as an infected person. The pickets killed him, and the village was burned down, leaving me alone. He escaped with Alina."

Her red eyes dimmed as she looked at the snowy sky. Snowflakes fell in front of her from the black sky.

"You feel guilty, right? Xiaota."

"If I hadn't gone to that village, wouldn't this have happened? Later, I kept thinking. In fact, I also know that even without my presence, Ursus's treatment of infected people will still be the same. If we don't If you resist and allow their bullying and oppression, you will never survive.”

Tallulah looked at Chen Mo and said: "It was only then that I finally solidified the idea in my heart. If Ursus doesn't let us live, we will live on our own. The infected can always find a way to live. Just rely on Among us, the things in the village are only what I can encounter, but on this land, there are more things that I have never encountered and cannot see with my own eyes."

"Alina and I fled far away until we encountered another village that was being searched by pickets. We rescued the people in that village and then contacted the infected people in other places. From then on, there were more and more people. , after hearing about the deeds of the infected guerrillas in the snowfield, I led my team to find them, hoping to cooperate with the guerrillas."

Tallulah said: "It was also at that time that I met the Frost Stars. Like us, they are fighting for the infected. There must be more people on this land who have the same ideas as us. I want They hear our voices, those infected are not alone, but before that, we have to find a way to keep more people alive."

She has always been very independent.

She has been like this since she was a child. She always has many ideas in her heart, many that Chen Mo is unwilling to try. She has tenacity beyond ordinary people and surprising integrity. This kind of integrity often makes her spend her whole life working on one thing. , even if the thing itself didn't do much good to her.

Upright people usually do not end well, just like kindness. This land does not leave any soil for them to take root and sprout. It is difficult for people to live and live in the way they want. , because there are always conflicts between some people's hearts and reality, which make them have to stop.

But is this wrong?

No, he shouldn't be wrong. It would be so sad if a land was cut off from hope. But for Chen Mo, Tallulah's so-called ideal only made him feel heavy.

Maybe Tallulah's concerns were well founded.

One can never be too sure of what he says.

Chen Mo thought, it would be great if he didn't go through so much.

If he hadn't experienced so much, he should have been able to stand by Tallulah without hesitation at this time. After Tallulah expressed his distant and unrealistic ideal, he should have agreed.

But Chen Mo also knew it wouldn't be that easy.

After all, he was a selfish person. A selfish person would never be moved by the plight of others. He was like a school of fish washed up on the beach after low tide. What Tallulah wanted to do was not just put them back into the sea, she wanted to What they do is fight against the entire tide.

She may have realized what she was going to face, and maybe she felt she was ready.

Perhaps death was an expected outcome for her.

She can give everything, even her life, for her ideal, but for Chen Mo, can she sacrifice Tallulah for Tallulah's great and upright ideal?

Knowing that there was no result, he watched her die for a ridiculous hope.

Can he forgive himself?

In other words, when he thinks back one day, how will he convince himself and how will he face Chen.

None of the three of them lived a happy life.

Chen Mo knows better than Tallulah what she will face in the future. After all, he is a realistic person and is not optimistic about the current infected camp. Ursus has not reached that time yet, and they will not have any chance. Even if there were, they wouldn't be able to catch it.

She is just a pawn, a person who has no ambition and is not ruthless enough. In the end, she will not be able to achieve great things, because most of her enemies are like this.

The best and worst outcome is that one day, what they do will shock the entire Ursus, no matter good or bad, that's all.

Chen Mo didn't think he could do anything for her.

After all, these people are insignificant. When the opponent is enlarged to a country or even two opposing classes, most people are insignificant.

What Tallulah needs is not one or two powerful warriors, nor one or two insignificant cities. She needs much more than these, and now she...has nothing.

This is a road with no end in sight, this road is longer and more terrifying than Tallulah imagined, and what maintains them is only hope, the word hope, light and weightless hope.

"Do you feel too naive?"

【~-

"I knew you would say that." Chen Mo didn't have any surprise: "When we were children in the orphanage, those words you said, it's only now that I finally understood what they meant."