Longmen Memoirs

When he was young, he was very naive, thinking that he could still change the world, because he had something different in his mind. He fantasized that he could do something great. He fantasized, and he couldn't help but fantasize.

But reality severely trampled his fantasy into pieces, shattering it into pieces and trampling him on the soles of his feet. He struggled, but could no longer get up like he did outside Columbia.

"Mr. Chen Mo, you may not know that Ms. Kelsey said something similar to you." Theresia seemed to have discovered something interesting, tilting her head slightly and pinching the corner of her clothes. , said slightly briskly: "Just think of me as complaining a little. I won't give up easily, even if it's just for them. I will go on this road until the day I can no longer walk. I I believe that someone will inherit everything from me and go on in my place.”

"Your Majesty... Theresa." Chen Mo breathed out lightly. Theresa's eyes fell on her face, and that tired but pretentious smile touched his heart that should have been cold. .

He just felt that the smile on Theresia's face was so helpless and sad. She was pretending to be relaxed and brisk, as if she didn't care about the hardships.

But she is a dying person, and the hand of death is about to touch her face. She turns back and smiles to comfort you: It's okay, I'm fine.

But when she was alone, she would still look at the dusk sky in Kazdale and sigh softly. She held up a torch and walked alone in the dark night, becoming a beacon for everyone, but she could only see her own shadow getting closer and closer. The dimmer sparks swayed, and she couldn't see the path under her feet. When she looked back, the souls who had entrusted her with life and death were looking at her, waiting for her decision.

Those eyes weighed heavily on her shoulders.

She has never been a qualified ruler. She is not decisive enough, she is not ruthless enough, she is not ruthless enough, she is too gentle, she is too peaceful, and her ideals are too naive.

She was far behind her brother Wang.

But most rulers are not qualified, and most kings do not need to have these talents. You just need to know people and use them well. You only need to make most people agree with your ideas and be willing to fight for you.

What you need are excellent generals, brave soldiers, the recognition of the people and... your unchanging belief.

In fact, you have never been a cold-hearted person. In fact, you are as innocent and funny as ever, funny and pitiful.

"If you still feel that the road ahead is far away, I want to tell you a future." Chen Mo finally made a decision. He took Theresia's hand. She couldn't see the road under her feet, but it didn't matter, because he gave She brought a path she could see.

"A future... that I have seen with my own eyes."

Chen Mo walked a long way in the darkness, a long way to nowhere, but one day, he finally encountered a touch of white, pure white, but he did not dare to step forward, he was afraid that it would be another illusion.

But in the end, he couldn't help but get closer. Maybe it would be fake, but so what?

It's just that it's broken a little more completely.

For think tank assistance, Kelsey is better than Chen Mo. For military planning, Doctor is better than Chen Mo. Chen Mo has no more outstanding talent, better ability, and closer wisdom than anyone else.

But he also has something that they, or perhaps no one in this world, has ever seen.

Just because:

I have...seen the future.

Chapter 77 Exile in Kazdare

Your Highness, you may not know that I had a friend when I was a child. I always thought that she would leave me one day, so I tried desperately to keep her and tried every method I could think of, but I still could Feeling her getting further and further away from me, I panicked, but there was nothing I could do.

I hope she can leave me one day and become the kind of person she wants to be. Even if that kind of person is out of reach for me, I can't deny that I want to keep her and trap her in My side.I should be a selfish person, and I don’t deny this selfishness, so I left her first. I was thinking that since I couldn’t keep her by my side, maybe one day, when she needs me, I can still be by her side.

Later, Tallulah also said something similar to His Highness. I found her in the wilderness of northern Ursus, and she told me that she would not give up easily, even if it was just for them, she would continue on this path, Until the day she can no longer walk, she believes that someone will inherit everything from her and walk on her behalf. Even then, the path under their feet is still unclear.

She and His Highness are the same kind of people, and they hold the same ideals, but Tallulah is not His Highness. There are not enough people around her who can help her. Her road is more bitter and difficult. She knows what she is doing. But even though she knew it would be a long journey, she still wanted to go on.

------

June 1086, 8, Crystalline Era

The Sakaz camp began to retreat from the land of Kazdale. The exiled Sakaz people continued on the road to exile after burning the bodies of their relatives and comrades.

The regent's army and the mercenaries of its lords followed closely behind.

There was a heavy rain in Kazdale yesterday, and the rain gradually became heavier at night. Through the thin gray tent, the sound of raindrops hitting the oil paper was really heard. There was a faint light inside the tent, and the same tent There are several Sakaz people living inside. They were originally mercenaries who lost their mercenary team in exile on this land. Finally, after hearing the news from His Highness, they gathered under His Highness's banner.

"Aren't you asleep yet? Brother Chen."

Chen Mo sat in front of the light. The arms box he had set up became his temporary desk. The pen in his hand stopped.

"Well, I'll be asleep right away."

"what are you writing?"

"Diary." Chen Mo turned around and answered.

"Diary, I didn't expect Brother Chen to have such a hobby? I remember that Brother Chen is literate, which is really good. I also wanted to learn how to write before." He murmured softly and shook his head: "But forget it. I probably didn’t have that blessing, but I’m pretty good now.”

"It's time to learn now. I remember there is a school in the camp." Chen Mo suggested: "You can go and learn during the break."

"No, what should I say?" He lay on the camp bed and slapped his face: "It's funny for me to be such a big man and learn calligraphy together with the brats in the school who don't even have hair. , I can’t afford to lose this person.”

"Would you feel embarrassed?" Chen Mo asked.

"A little bit. To be honest, people like us have never thought that one day we would be able to settle down and study. When I was young, my father would not come back for a long time. I asked my mother where my father had gone, and my mother said that my father had gone there. I have traveled far away, and I will come back when I grow up." He said with some memories.

"Is he back?" Chen Mo asked.

"No."

"Feel sorry……"

"It's okay. I didn't understand until I grew up that my father went there. Now he and I are doing the same thing. We Sakaz people have spent our lives in the flames of war and gunpowder smoke. If we pick up weapons, we are mercenaries. If we put down weapons, we are mercenaries. It’s common for civilians to die casually in that place.”

"My father always brought back a lot of food and things with other countries' labels on them. Now I know where those things came from. They were covered in blood, but I ate them very happily. One time he took When I came back to this book, it contained people and scenery from other countries. I couldn’t read, but I remembered the picture, which was completely different from our Kazdare, just like the paradise described by the Laterans.”

The life of the Sakaz people is not long. They exchange their lives as mercenaries for supplies for survival. The supplies are stained with the blood of others, but this is their way of life, and their lives are not valuable.

So no one will pity them when they die. They deserve their own fault for their death. Even if a certain bag of food snatched by a mercenary is their family's one-month ration, even if a certain mercenary's newborn child is still waiting at home. He brought back a full moon gift for himself.

This is how they have always lived.

"Brother Chen, you are from outside. You must have lived in that kind of place before. Can you tell me what it felt like?"

"You mean Longmen?"

Chen Mo was unwilling to break the childhood fairy tale of this Sakaz mercenary.

"Longmen is a very prosperous city. Everyone there lives a prosperous life. Everyone has smiles on their faces and lives peacefully. There is no war. The city under the management of the Guards Bureau is peaceful and peaceful."

"so good."

The horns on the head of the Sakaz mercenary were reflected on the gray oilcloth in the dim light, and Chen Mo saw his eyes looking at him full of yearning.

"Why did you leave...Longmen, haha, these two words are weird to pronounce."

He is illiterate, but he can speak Colombian, which is ridiculous because Colombia is the largest country in arms trafficking to Sakaz. In order to survive, he slowly learned the language of this country, as well as many languages ​​​​that he must know.

Chen Mo was stunned, why he left Longmen, he had been thinking about this issue for a long time, why he left Longmen in the first place, and why he took this road.

If Longmen was really as good as he said, why would he leave it?

"Because there is something I have to do. If I don't leave Longmen, I may not be able to achieve it in my life."

"Ideal? You literate people always like to talk about this kind of thing."

"Probably so. Actually, I don't know very well. Now that I think about it, I must have been stupid at the time." Chen Mo said, "I was actually stupid enough to leave Longmen."

"It's quite stupid. If it were me, I would definitely die there."

"If I still have the chance to go back." Chen Mo said, "I want to die there too."

"Brother Chen, to tell you the truth, I also have an ideal now." He said, "His Highness allowed me to see this ideal. One day we, Kazdare, can become as prosperous and prosperous as places like your Longmen and Colombia." Get up, His Highness said, the Sakaz people should not shed tears, and the Sakaz people should also have a future. In fact, I can’t quite understand a lot of what His Highness said, but I can understand from His Highness’s words what she wants to tell us. What, it’s completely different from the arms dealer’s lie when he sold us weapons and the lord’s lie when he snatched the last copper coin from us. Your Highness, she really wants to change this land.”

"Is that why you followed His Highness?" Chen Mo asked.

"It's better than dying pointlessly at the hands of the lord. If you follow His Highness and die fighting for His Highness, your life will not be in vain."

"I heard Scout say the same thing as you."

"Scout? He is a very powerful person. You may not know the kind of power I am talking about. Anyway, I have heard of the name Scout before. He is very famous in the Sakaz mercenary circle. You know, famous It also means that there are many people who want to kill him and get his bounty, but they didn’t expect that he would come here. It turns out that even people as cold as him have such naive ideas.”

"Very naive?"

Why would you do it now that you know it's naive?

"It's naive, but worth it."

People will always lose their lives for something in this life. Instead of dying in a daze, it is better to choose a direction, even if they cannot see this direction.

Under the dim light, he finished speaking and covered himself with the quilt again.

"Go to bed early, Brother Chen. There is still a long way to go tomorrow. Damn the Puppet King. Damn the war. I hope you all have a bad death, *Kazdel swears*"

His last two curses were mixed with the local dialect of Kazdaele that Chen Mo couldn't understand.

Chen Mo turned around and continued to write his unfinished diary on the armament box. Next to the diary was a crystal glass fragment. The fragment shone brightly under the weak lamp and was reflected on a corner of the white paper.

[Small tower:

Long time no see, how are you doing now?I am 16 years old, and I hid my age in Black Steel. I used to always want to grow up quickly, but I found that it is actually quite simple to grow up quickly.

I am now in Kazdaele. As I told you last time, Kazdaele is different from what people in the outside world have said. Yes, it is really different. They have also thought about changing and are working hard towards this. To move forward, compared to them, I always seem too ridiculous to be afraid of moving forward.

It rained heavily today. In the rain, they burned the bodies of their comrades and relatives. We have been fleeing and living in exile on the land of Kazdaele. I met His Highness a few days ago, Xiaota. I decided to tell you about the past that I have talked about with you. I have to tell your Highness those things again. Your Highness, she may be really different. Many people believe in her, even if they know that what they are doing is in vain, but people are most afraid of having a hope. 】

Chen Mo glanced at the glass shards placed beside the table.

[I met a child named Karien, a very interesting child, very much like Chen when she was young, but much more naughty than her. He left and went to a far away place. I hope he can be here He is living a good life elsewhere. If he goes to a place without war and exile, such as our former Longmen, maybe he will want to return to Kazdale. I think Kazdale at that time should be able to give him a real job. s future. 】

Chen Mo put down the pen gently, glanced at the written letter under the oil lamp, and smiled. Maybe she was doing meaningless things. She knew that she couldn't send it to her, but she still couldn't help but write it. After writing it down, he folded the letter and put it in his bag.

Tomorrow, I might leave this place.The conversation with Theresia ended in vain. Kelsey's reminder forced His Highness to leave Chen Mo and ended their conversation.

But before leaving, Chen Mo still wanted to see His Highness once more and repeat what he had said before. It was a bit ridiculous to say that, who would believe that he had seen those things before.

Even if he had really seen it, how could he win people's trust?

It was at this time that the raincloth of the tent was lifted, opening a small corner, and a flash of white suddenly appeared at the entrance of the tent.

There was a heavy wind and rain outside the window, and the wind mixed with the rain blew his pink hair, which was stained with crystal raindrops.

"Your Highness?"

"Mr. Chen Mo, have I disturbed you?"

Her Highness stood at the door of the tent, lifting the raincloth with one hand. Behind her was the shrill wind and rain, and a white shadow fell on the swaying flames.

"No, why are you here?"

Chen Mo didn't expect Theresia to suddenly appear in her tent.

"I'm afraid, Mr. Chen Mo, you have left." She looked at Chen Mo and breathed softly, "Fortunately, you are still here."

"You came here specifically to find me?"

"Yes." She nodded, stuck out the tip of her tongue, and said a little distressedly: "I spent a lot of effort to get rid of Kelsey to come here. I'm sorry, I have been stared at by Kelsey these days, so There is no way I can come to you.”

"Ms. Kelsey may have warned you not to have any contact with me."

Chen Mo thought of Kelsey's instructions to him a few days ago. It was better to say it was a threat.

"Please don't worry about it. Kelsey has no ill intentions towards you, but she is always very careful when it comes to my affairs. Kelsey said that Mr. Chen Mo's background is very suspicious. Before it is confirmed, she asked me to try my best." Don’t have too much contact with you.”

"But you're still here."

"Yes, because I want to hear what you said about the future you have seen." Theresia nodded slightly, her scarlet eyes staring at Chen Mo who was sitting in front of the light. She had a visible tattoo on her left waist. Black crystal.

"Are you willing to share with me the future you have seen?"

"You're not afraid that what I told you are all lies I made up myself. Maybe, I just wanted to ensure the value of my life here, so I deliberately deceived you, because I know what you need most now." Chen Mo said: "Your Highness, you should not trust someone easily. This is not a good thing for you. Ms. Kelsey is right to be vigilant."

"If you really want to deceive me, why would you remind me of this?" Theresa seemed to have discovered something. "You don't feel like a person with evil intentions to me."

"Your Highness, you don't know me or understand me. How dare you be so sure? It's too ridiculous to rely on a vague feeling."

"Are you?"

Theresia looked directly at Chen Mo, blowing a few strands of pink hair as the cold wind poured into the tent.

"How can you ask someone directly like this?" Chen Mo said helplessly.

"That's why I'm here."

"Your Highness, you really don't look like a qualified ruler." Chen Mo said: "Are you really willing to believe what I said? You don't think it is just a person's fantasy."

"If you've ever seen it with your own eyes, I'd try to believe it."

Chapter 78 The flames of war continue ([-]): Aphasia

Theresia is an overly polite person, and her politeness does not make people feel alienated. On the contrary, for people who meet her for the first time, her politeness is naturally cordial and kind.

She seems to be born with a unique charm that makes people want to get close to her, but it is difficult for them to have any dirty thoughts.