I am the emotional sustenance of your deceased

When Su Shi thought of Qiansui's brisk footsteps as she climbed the stairs, she couldn't help but sigh that time had completely abandoned her.

Pushing the door, climbing the stairs, and walking to the washing machine, the floor-to-ceiling glass windows around her spread the last tenderness of the afternoon on Su Shi.

I’m about to start worrying about what to eat tomorrow. There are not many things we can choose in our lives, and what to eat is one of them.

When Su Shi opened the washing machine, she saw Qiansui's little bear. She smiled, squinted her eyes, and took it out.

"It's clean, yet you want to wash it? And there's no way you can put a toy like this in the washing machine."

The teddy bear she had as a child was broken by her mother by throwing it into the washing machine. Haha, she cried so hard at that time.

Su Shi took a clean basin and filled it with water, intending to wash it manually. Qian Sui was so lucky to have a mother who could wash the doll for her by hand.

The teddy bear's fur wasn't very smooth, giving it a very old, sun-kissed feel. Su Shi's hand touched the bear in the cool water, and she suddenly felt something on its back...

"Ok?"

what is this?

Squinting his eyes with the help of the sunlight, he discovered that there was a line on the back of the little bear... no, not just one, but many stitches.

Is this... a teddy bear that was torn apart and then sewn back together?

"hiss."

Su Shi's inner uneasiness began to spread. She turned the teddy bear over and stared into the other's eyes as dark as black pearls. Suddenly, a strange idea came to her mind.

[This seems to be... mine? ]

If it's really mine, then there should be a remnant of a silk label somewhere near the leg... no, at the waistline...

No way, it can't really happen...

Su Shi remained silent, but her hands did not stop moving. She searched again and again, but fortunately she did not see it.

"Haha, I was saying, how could it be mine?"

Su Shi seemed to be relieved and continued to wash the teddy bear for her adopted daughter. However, when she finished washing, she found that there seemed to be several threads sealing the soles of the bear's feet.

She turned the teddy bear upside down, but the words she saw made her stop laughing.

【SOYO】

Who sewed this...

It can't be a coincidence.

She hurriedly continued to check the teddy bear's waist, and sure enough, she found the clue.

Although there was indeed no trace of the label at that place, the relatively sparse hair seemed to have proved something.

"..."

Mom gave Chitose her own toys from childhood?

Why is this toy that's supposed to not exist coming back...and it doesn't belong to me anymore?

Just like a mother's love.

My mother has never been with me, but she has been with Qiansui. Could it be that she wants to compensate me in disguise?

[But I still don’t feel my mother’s care...]

Su Shi's face was turning cold. Although she knew she was just overthinking it, she felt inexplicably depressed when she saw that the thing that once belonged to her and the motherly love that once belonged to her were taken away by Nagasaki Chitose.

It's obviously my own teddy bear, how can I give it to someone else... That's too much, although... it's not that much.

I'm such an adult, but I still get upset. Is it because I'm under too much pressure?

"Ah... I have such thoughts, really..."

The teddy bear was hung on the clothesline. When Su Shi turned around, she found Qiansui shivering in the corner.

Qiansui just glanced at Su Shi and ran away, not giving Su Shi any chance to react.

"Eh? Don't go..."

Ch140. Nagasaki House, Mother and Daughter Hug Each Other and Cry

"Hey! Don't go..."

Hiss, I thought my behavior just now didn’t scare Qiansui, right?

Su Shi has been busy with work recently and her mother is seriously ill, so her mood changes so much that she even scared herself.

If this emotion affects children...

Not caring about the water stains on his hands, Su Shi wiped them casually on his body and chased Qiansui downstairs.

In fact, she needs a good rest more than taking care of the children, such as going on vacation or sleeping in bed for ten days or half a month.

In fact, Su Shi has never gotten over the shadow of her mother's sudden illness, especially when she saw the bloodless face, the sadness in her heart was even more difficult to suppress.

My mother is old too.

Was that strong mother also defeated by time?

On the first floor, Su Shi could no longer see Qiansui's shadow.

The child was very well behaved and definitely didn't want to tease her. It seemed that he was really frightened by her behavior just now.

"Xiao Sui? Xiao Sui! It's Mommy, where are you?"

A familiar rustling sound came from a familiar place, that was the cloakroom.

"Why does this child hide in the closet when he's frightened? Really..."

Su Shi opened the wardrobe door a little and saw Chitose Nagasaki shivering in the closet.

The corners of her eyes were slightly red and her body was trembling. Even a ray of light could scare her.

Because the child was too well-behaved, Su Shi actually never forgot that the child was only six years old.

"Xiao Sui? I hope you weren't scared by what Mom did just now."

I feel more and more like a wicked stepmother or an old witch. Where does this strange sense of déjà vu come from?

"Wow... Mom, that was so scary... Her eyes were so cold..."

There's even a hint of tears in your voice! How could you cheat like this? It makes me feel even more guilty.

Su Shi didn't know how to comfort him. She only knew that she couldn't just leave him in the closet and ignore him.

"Mom just...remembered something unhappy. Can I carry you out? Let's not stay in the closet anymore, okay?"

"do not want!"

Unexpectedly, Su Shi was rejected by Qian Sui.

I saw Chitose in the cabinet shrinking back again, but in fact there was no extra space behind her.

"Why," Su Shi chose to speak first when the silence stretched, "why would you always hide in the closet?"

"Grandma said that if you want to cry, you should find a closed space so that no one will laugh at you...Mom, please go away. I want to cry..."

"Pfft, you kid."

Did your mother ever say something similar to you when you were a child?

Su Shi felt dazed, she even seemed to hear her mother hugging her and comforting her.

The child in the closet, herself in her memories, and her long-gone mother. Only now did Su Shi realize that the connection between the three was actually much deeper than she had imagined.

"..."

Memories with spots of light flashed all the time, and Su Shi seemed to have returned to a certain day in the past.

A little girl who was waiting for her parents to come home but nothing came chose to hide in the closet.

What did I do in the closet that day?

That day, she left a note in the cabinet. Although her handwriting was still crooked at that time, she still wrote "The cabinet is the safest place" in that small cabinet that gave her a sense of security.

I fell asleep that day, and it was my mother who carried me out...

Just like…

When Su Shi came to his senses, he found that he had already carried Qiansui out.

When I was a child, I woke up one day and found that the note was missing. After that, my mother tried to come home early every day... Ah... so many years have passed in a flash.

Both my mother and I are old.

"Mom? Why is Mom crying too?"

"Mom is missing her own mom..."

It turns out that my mother still remembers the cabinet from that time.

She even told Xiaosui such stupid things. Seriously, she had only hidden in the closet once.

I had been waiting for her to come back at the dining table obediently.

"Mommy, please stop crying, okay... Is it because you made me feel bad? I won't hide in the closet anymore... Can you please stop crying?"

"age…"

Su Shi saw Chitose Noshiro's eyes, which were filled with complicated feelings.

What emotion is hidden there, sadness or worry?

Why would a child whom I have never cared about care about me so much? Is it just because...

Am I her mother?

Ah, mother.

It was not until now that Su Shi realized the weight of these two words.

The responsibilities and obligations represented by a mother were fully unfolded before Su Shi.

There seemed to be a reflection in Qiansui's pupils, which looked like his own, but not his own.

Is that your mother's?

Tears gathered on his chin and finally dripped onto Chitose's face.

The tears of mother and daughter gathered together on Qiansui's cheek, and finally slid down her ears to the floor, causing a tiny storm.

"Mother?"

Chitose's voice was still so warm.

"Yeah! Yeah... I'm... I..."

My mother is gradually fading away.

And I, your mother, am going to become a mother like your mother.

Mother, will you be proud of me? If I become a mother like you...will you be happy for me?

"Woo——"

All the pressures and emotions that had been dormant for a long time burst out at this moment. Su Shi didn't want to cry. She never thought that she would cry at this time, but the worst thing in the world still happened.

She cried...completely in front of her daughter.

This is so embarrassing, please stop crying! Why are you still crying?

"Woo..."

Qiansui also cried along with Su Shi, and when the time was right, she did not forget to continue to give Su Shi a finishing blow.

"Will I be able to cry in my mother's arms from now on?"

"I...I won't let you suffer anymore..."

In front of the wardrobe, Nagasaki mother and daughter cried together.

Their voices were intermittent, but their tears kept flowing out.

They cried until the sky darkened and the room temperature dropped until evening.

Su Shi used the back of her hand to wipe away the tears on Qiansui's face, and finally wiped away the tears from the corners of her own eyes.

"Xiao Sui... Mom will definitely treat you well in the future. You... may be the last gift my mom left for me... and one of the last two family members I have in this world... Can you please forgive my previous behavior... Mom... Mom, I..."