Collapse, a simulator of lifelong regret!

At this time, Alicia was still too young, and had not even started her journey. She only knew the world through fairy tales, and was forced to encounter the first separation.

In fact, they really separated not when Alicia was sixteen, but when she was five years old.

But before I was sixteen, I could still cover up the nature of this separation by saying that I was with Jiang Cheng every day, I could touch his face and skin as long as I reached out my hand, I could smell his scent if I got closer, and he was always by my side.

Until even this fig leaf was torn off by Weiwei.

As a result, she even has to watch the happy life between Wei Liwei and Jiang Cheng as a third party.

Chapter of Stars and Moon: 83. Alicia: This is a swimsuit designed by Velvet. Do you like it?

There is no way to redeem those memories that are filled with sadness and pain, memories that are filled with love and hope with only one heroine.

If she could not make an excessive gesture to make the boy realize the problem, Alicia really wanted to clasp her hands together and sternly refuse.

Refuse! Absolutely! Absolutely refuse!!

The only thing is that things in the past must never be mentioned.

It was not a pleasant experience.

Not to mention that it is perfect and full of ups and downs like a fairy tale. The protagonists overcame many disasters, invited companions one after another, realized the truth in their hearts, and finally found their own beautiful paradise.

The girl's past could not even be called a journey or an adventure.

The first part is about being a shameless voyeur.

Although he knew that the relationship was a two-way one, he still covered himself up with false lies, saying that their relationship might not be that good and that Weiwei might be pretending, while he took a camera to peek.

——Everyone knows who the despicable and shameless pretender is.

The essence is just because it is unacceptable.

The essence is just because I can't accept Jiang Cheng's departure.

I have never experienced life without my youth. I have never experienced life without my youth.

No matter how cold she had acted, no matter how much she had ignored him, as if she didn't care about spending a single minute with the boy outside, as long as she returned to the tent, she would eventually see the boy.

You can just reach out and touch the boy's body, which has the healthy body temperature of a normal person.

I could smell the boy's breath as long as I got close to him. There wasn't any special aroma or fragrance, but I surprisingly liked his scent.

This is the peace of mind that comes from the bottom of my heart, because I know that no matter where I am, I can always see Jiangcheng, which has never left me, not far away.

It is precisely because of this doting and pampering that the girl only realizes everything after she loses it.

At this moment, the girl has not really fallen. Even if she is willing to accept that she is no longer the only one in Jiang Cheng's heart, accept that she becomes the third party and becomes a bridesmaid, she can still accompany the boy as before.

——Until that day comes.

It was as if a domino effect had been pushed aside, and the crisis could no longer be ignored. The continuous disasters and despair gradually swallowed up everything of the girl.

The self-righteous guilt that he attached to himself was just like his previous disregard for the boy. He would rather linger under the street light outside the house than step into the room and give the struggling boy a warm hug.

Arrogant and stupid.

The third time I gave up an opportunity that was so close.

For the third time, I gave up the opportunity to stay with you in Jiangcheng.

So the world will never pity the girl again. Three times the limit is a sure thing. Even if she insists on sacrificing herself, even if Vivi is willing to turn herself into Ikaros, all she can see is the boy who has already died.

After a long period of torture.

I experienced complete mental numbness.

I have experienced countless times of being alone and feeling the suffocating pain that comes from my heart.

As a ruthless and numb Honkai killing machine, holding the broken Paradise Lost, it hunts down its own kind one after another.

However, this is meaningless to the girl's nature.

I won't feel the slightest bit good about this killing.

She was still falling endlessly, still sinking endlessly, almost falling into the darkest and deepest ocean, where she couldn't even see any light. The pressure from all sides almost crushed the girl.

This is a disaster that the human self cannot resist.

The human heart cannot bear this pain.

Under the body of the Herrscher, the heart, which is not much different from that of humans, and can feel lost, happy, sad, and excited by things that belong to others, has been broken.

Finally, the girl went completely crazy and did something that went against the boy's wishes. For her own selfish desires, she even insulted that pure love again and forced the dead to be resurrected.

In the end, I really completely insulted that love, and even the person I once loved the most and was the most true to me had been completely forgotten.

Even after the young man had to bear the pain and sorrow of losing his feelings once again, the most despicable Herrscher was able to embrace happiness again.

None of these three time periods is worth telling about. They are just people who are so stupid that they cannot explain anything and hurt others.

As a voyeur, as a sinner, as a masochist.

No one will watch a story like this.

The way this story is written cannot even be called a sadomasochistic one, because it is entirely because of the girl's own actions that caused the disaster that hurt others.

If this dirty past were known to the boy... no matter how gentle a person is, he would surely show disgust and aversion.

and so……

Alicia simply raised her head slightly, and buried her guilt, sadness and all the past in her pink eyes.

"Travel and stuff... How can reality be as beautiful as in fairy tales?"

"Every life has its ups and downs. Instead of focusing on things in the past, it is better to live your present life well and add some color to it."

……

The gentle voice spoke words that seemed convincing enough, if not for the panic that occasionally flashed in the eyes.

After all, Alicia was a flawless girl who had never deceived anyone except herself.

Lies and falsehoods...

It is simply impossible to deceive the person you love the most.

what……

——Or was it just a perfunctory response?

As for this kind of thing that can complete one's own memory, it is almost the only important thing besides following Alicia according to the will of the thing called pursuit of emotions that is beating in the heart at this moment.

Even if theoretically there shouldn't be any feeling, even if the memory is empty, it doesn't matter, for that thing that has been covered in dust and sealed deep inside.

The boy can still feel an inexplicable expectation and a desire to explore, which, in terms of universal rationality, can be called a desire for knowledge.

Want to know.

Want to know.

I want to find out what happened during that period of time. I want to find out what happened in these ten years.

pity……

Alicia seemed reluctant to mention it.

What happened?

"What you said is true. After all, it is something that has passed. Although I am very interested, really interested, really, really interested."

Jiang Cheng made no secret of his interest in the past, perhaps because he was no longer as emotionally intelligent as he once was in his current state, and his pupils showed a sparkling look without any hesitation.

"Let's go around town together first."

Alicia still hadn't satisfied her curiosity, and she unconsciously avoided the burning gaze. She turned around gently on the spot, her skirt blooming and spinning like a flower, and she gently held the boy's hand.

"There are many facilities in this town that have not completely disappeared due to the passage of time. If you look at them again, you may be able to find some old memories~?"

"Whether it's the small trees on the back hill, the smooth streets in the town, or the church in the center, our footprints are everywhere here."

The girl used some stiff words and her cherry-colored eyes were full of emotion, trying to change the topic to something else.

"Ok."

Even the gesture of never telling a lie was a little too stiff - the only person the girl deceived was herself, covering up the lies for herself. Even after the boy's death, when she communicated with outsiders again, she was numb.

Jiang Cheng still gently clenched the soft fingertips, took light steps, and let the girl take him to a familiar yet unfamiliar place.

The two of them ran on the flat, busy road. The residents on both sides did not understand at first, but after realizing that the visitor was Alicia, they began to greet her warmly and praised the goddess's beautiful name.

No one gave any different answer at this moment. No one even responded coldly or stood there doing their own thing. Everyone tried their best to show their enthusiasm.

No matter how ungrateful or ungrateful a person is, he or she will inevitably fall for this charm that is perfect even if it is numb.

In a sense, the lack of laws and morals in the town has been made up by the appreciation of beautiful things and theological recitations.

Although the price of this emotional sustenance is that the young man running behind can already feel countless conservative yet still knife-like gazes.

It was as if I had returned to the past, not just to the small town, but also to the birthday party.

A party that nominally belongs to just one person.

In reality, it was as lively as an exchange meeting, with countless people filling every place, and even a large mansion could not accommodate them all.

Countless people formed a huge fan club, and the gifts presented to Alicia alone were enough to fill up an entire huge room.

When many people arrive at the party and find out that this is a birthday party for a person named Jiang Cheng, they will feel jealous of this protagonist who cannot be called the protagonist. That feeling is engraved deep in their memory and is difficult to dissipate.

He did not experience any preference from Alicia, but had to endure the jealousy and some small thoughts of others for this non-existent love.

Many people were unwilling to stop even though they knew that they were just Alicia's brother at that time.

If there is only one difference...

That is, at this moment, I can feel the warmth of the girl's soft and boneless palm through my fingertips, and close at hand is the hot breath of the girl as she runs.

The sweet scent left in the air happened to be felt by the boy who was only half a body behind, and hit his nose and mouth corners immediately.

If it was a birthday party, I'm afraid it would be difficult to get even a little closer, let alone so close, and shaking hands would be completely impossible.

And now...

The boy's fingers were tightly entangled with the girl's delicate white fingers, and they would never loosen even in the wind, even if they were shaking.

It was not an active hold. The hand that could not be reached in the past no matter how hard she tried to chase was now tightly held by Alicia, who refused to let go even a little, as if she was afraid that the hand would disappear if she let go.

——A lot has changed.

The houses on both sides of the road are not as neat as they used to be, but have countless architectural styles, as if people from all over the world live together.

Running on the ground felt more comfortable than I remembered. The road paved with pebbles on the soil was extremely smooth and there was no pain at all.

In Jiangcheng, one can also feel the natural adhesion produced by the melting of some stones, which melts all the protruding surfaces into a smooth surface, preventing anyone from tripping or feeling discomfort under their feet. The road builders must have spent a lot of effort, carefully polishing and controlling the temperature bit by bit.

I don’t know who built this road, but even the small details were taken care of. He must be a very gentle and kind person.

……

There is no need to run with the wind. The act of running itself is chasing the wind. Thinking that even though twenty years have passed, I am still chasing the wind as before, until I surpass this wind from the past and transcend the sadness of the past. The tight pace finally paused a little - Alicia gently pointed to the private swimming pool that had left a place in her memory.

"Look……"

“That’s the swimming pool where we used to be.”

"I still remember that you loved to dive to the bottom of the pool in one breath, then turn over and stay there for a while, looking up at the street lights by the pool from underwater."

"Ah."

Jiangcheng still looks well preserved and has not been popularized in any way in the town. The swimming pool is still preserved in a private room.

The dark pupils flickered gently, reflecting a yellow light, and an inexplicable emotion urged him to speak, proving that the boy had indeed surpassed his past achievements.

"The warm yellow light flows along the slightly blue water waves, and the exhaled bubbles float up like jellyfish and finally disappear. This scene is like a dream... although this behavior usually happens after you fall down."

[You gently pointed out the place where you once lived together, based on the fragments that almost emerged from your memory, which did not seem to be what you searched for at all. Theoretically, that place held your only happiness.]

[In the final analysis, your communication with Alicia has never been very good. It was only in the first few years that it was relatively harmonious.]

[After almost twenty years, you come here again. Perhaps this also means that you have surpassed the wind you once had. ]

"Has it surpassed the wind of the past?"

"It seems that I have finally caught up with that breeze, instead of just standing there exhausted and feeling as if something is blowing on me."

It is not the sorrow of losing emotions like a Herrscher, nor is it the feeling of having one's memories and self constrained and bound to serve only the twisted wishes of one person.