Warhammer: In the Name of Nirvana

[According to the mortal calendar, today is a special day. Starting from tens of thousands of years ago, the ancient humans on Terra would celebrate one cycle of their home planet around the sun on this day. 】

[Seriously, until now, I don’t understand why they did this. 】

"Perhaps for religious reasons, my dearest sister, you know: according to the oldest mythological texts discovered so far, the Mesopotamian mythology system..."

【……】

[Thank you for your popular science, Luo Jia: But I remember that I just asked you to adjust the conflict between those two fucked-up things and stop them from arguing, right? 】

"Yes, you asked me to mediate the conflict between Mortarion and Magnus and resolve their disputes: but I think it may be easier for them to resolve me than to resolve their disputes."

[It’s great that you have this kind of self-awareness. 】

"..."

[So what did you do? 】

"I went to Leman Russ, hoping he could solve this problem."

[You actually went to Leman Russ on a question about Magnus? 】

"...There are specialties in the art industry."

"Anyway, Leman Russ sounded quite happy, and he finally went."

[Is this why our house was blown away by Magnus's storm? 】

"……cough."

"I don't think it's Leman Russ's fault: and certainly not mine."

The Great Word Bearer's eyes drifted for a moment.

"When I found Leman Russ, he was taking his two wolves and helping Sanguinius build a treehouse on that tree. Then, you know, when Leman Russ took When his Dionysus Spear, along with his two wolves, jumped down from the tree and jumped in front of Magnus, this scene obviously touched something in Magnus... Well……"

【Past memories? 】

"……Roughly the same."

[So where is Magnus now? 】

"Ah, him: he was hung on the cliff by the brothers in anger. Ferrus also made a sauce of the sea fish he had just caught and smeared it on Magnus. Chagatai has been guarding him all this time. Next to it: he has just made a bow.”

"According to what they said, whether we can have a feast of seabirds tonight depends on whether the fish sauce on Magnus suits the taste of the seabirds."

【……】

[Remember to put more fish sauce on his eyes, oh, and on his spine. 】

Morgan sighed, turned around, and continued writing in her journal.

In fact, she didn't support this New Year's Day trip very much from the beginning. From a massage perspective, since her primarch brothers finally rushed back from their respective companies, universities or associations to accompany their genetic father On this New Year's Day, wouldn't everyone just stay in that big villa that is no different from a castle and have a meal?

But she obviously underestimated how free a semi-retired old man would be.

When Morgan heard that the emperor did not plan to spend New Year's Day in his large villa complex with 10,000 bodyguards, but bought a deserted island, he wanted to spend New Year's Day with his sons. On an [authentic] New Year's Eve, to be honest, she wanted to reject this idiot's opinion at first.

You know, for this so-called New Year's Eve, she gave up a crucial New Year's speech in front of voters: In the last election, Morgan was in those marginal constituencies because of these miscellaneous reasons. Lost to Guilliman.

If he hadn't known that Guilliman had also been kidnapped by Dorn and Krax in advance, Morgan wouldn't have even wanted to come back: He would use some people-friendly means to win over people during this kind of holiday, but Guilliman, the current leader of the Loyal Party , the best trick.

I still remember that in the largest party election, facing the Liberal Party headed by Horus and the Loyalist Party headed by Dorn, they fought for the entire election month. Both sides suffered losses and people's hearts were floating. Didn't Guilliman take advantage of this moment? At the critical moment, with the so-called "Holy Code of Consensus" he published in Macragge University, he won the votes of the majority of voters: he even took the opportunity to kick the hard-working Dorn from his position as the leader of the Loyal Party. Go down.

To be honest, Dorn's temper is good. If it was Morgan who encountered all this, she would sooner or later have to do something dirty to this famous president of Macragge University: This time on the desert island trip, it is Not a bad choice.

Interviewed, tricked, throat cut, and then dumped into the sea: no one could notice.

However, all this is just Morgan's fantasy after all. Guilliman's dead body is not floating on the sea. Instead, Morgan needs to really worry about whether he can survive until the second day of the New Year.

After all, the original plan was for twenty brothers to arrive on the deserted island first and clean the island's villas, observation decks and picnic areas: all of which had been installed by the Emperor's Martian Foundry Company. This had been done months ago, and the Primarchs only needed to unload the food from the ship, set out the plates, and wait until the Emperor, who had finished his work, arrived with his dear Secretary Malcador. Island, just spend this unexpected New Year's Eve together.

From a planning point of view, this seemed to be a problem that could not go wrong. The emperor did not even let his descendants bring any followers or followers: in his words, this kind of family banquet did not require the presence of outsiders. He also trusted his sons and daughters to put together what was needed for the dinner.

Of course, after he said these words, his beloved Horus asked Malcador whether he was considered an outsider, which was naturally ignored by their compassionate father.

However, the chairman of Terra Group and the first leader of the Loyal Party, who is good at abacus, obviously did not realize a problem: his dear twenty-year-old son has not been a brother and brother since childhood, and after adulthood, it is even more because Financial budgets and political votes were always at war with each other. His plan, from the moment he put all the Primarchs on a desert island, was like driving a dozen wild boars into a china shop.

Within fifteen minutes, the situation went completely out of control.

Magnus and Leman Russ, Dorn and Perturabo, Jaghatai and Mortarion, and Fulgrim and Ferrus.

Within fifteen minutes of landing, the first three groups started fighting on the spot, forcing everyone to rush up and pull them apart, constantly admonishing them to value peace.

Then within five minutes of landing, the two hugged each other in public and bit each other's lips, so that everyone had to rush up to pull them apart again, reminding them that this was still a public place.

Then?

Then Fulgrim became even more excited.

But in fact, at this moment, things were not particularly bad: until Magnus, who was beaten by Leman Russ from trying to persuade him to fight for blowing up the villa where he spent the night, and then was beaten to a bruised nose and face, Magnus, while The moment he shouted "I want to tell dad" while taking out the latest product that he participated in the research in the research laboratory of Hindden University.

Morgan knew that it was a global positioning mobile phone that was said to have a super strong signal. The original advertising slogan was "Performance is so powerful that it explodes".

Facts have proved that it is indeed powerful enough to explode.

While the mobile phone in Magnus's hand blew off one of his arms, it directly overloaded the only signal tower set up by the Mars Foundry Company on this desert island with a super strong signal, and at the same time connected new wires to the tower. Vulkan was thrown out.

Everyone only saw their reliable black brother draw a burning meteor arc in mid-air, accurately hitting the ship still anchored in the offshore area. The gorgeous firelight even surpassed the last trace of sunset on the horizon.

Before the charred Vulcan was washed up on the beach by the waves, everyone could only use their silence to witness the ship carrying them on their return journey, as well as all the ships storing food, sink quickly and resolutely. into the icy ocean.

Yes, thanks to the quick fights or fights on the beach, everyone in the original body was trying to break up the fight, or taking advantage of the opportunity to fish, and had no intention of loading and unloading their food: and these big The smart people soon realized this, and they stood on the beach with inexplicable sadness.

At least for this moment, everything seemed harmonious.

The only thing that was a bit disharmonious was Conrad who walked up to Vulcan and poked the burnt skin: with just one sentence, he woke up a dozen hungry bellies present.

"You said..."

Conrad poked Vulcan's belly, which was exuding a strange burnt aroma.

"Can this be a main course?"

——————

And just as Magnus was showing off his amazing wisdom in front of everyone, Morgan, who was standing far away, was talking on the phone, and the emperor was on the other end of the phone.

[Yes, the father is me. 】

【Um? What did you say? 】

[What do you mean, you can’t come? 】

Morgan laughed ridiculously.

[You took us all the way out from our respective companies and threw us all on this desert island. Now you tell me: You can't come? 】

[Aunt Erda, what happened to her? Hasn't the divorce agreement between you and her been signed a long time ago? Did she sue you again? Are we still going to fight for the custody of us? 】

[Isn’t this kind of judgment sure to win? Why do you have to choose to attend this time? ...Oh, the lawyer invited by the other side is called Xin Liezhi? Understood. 】

【……】

[Don’t worry, father, although I’m pretty sure that the news that you can’t come will make a few brothers frustrated: Well, some people should be frustrated, but we, the twenty Primarchs, are still alive on this island. What's the problem? Yes, the house... There is a small problem with the house, but the food and spare tents are still on the boat. We will treat this as a summer camp. Yes, we will go back in two days. 】

[Yes, I know. The food is enough for us for a week. Don’t worry, we will have no problem. Horus and I will keep an eye on them. Just concentrate on your court appearance. By the way, Don't forget to give Mr. Macado an annual leave. 】

[No annual leave? Also a year-end bonus? 】

[There is no year-end bonus, so don’t you have any New Year’s gifts? 】

【……What did you say? 】

[What do you mean, he didn’t even get a salary, so he just got food and housing? 】

【……】

【never mind. 】

【……】

[Okay, don’t worry, everything will be fine...]

"boom!!!"

【……】

【Well……】

[It seems like I have... a father now? Hello? are you still there? 】

[Father? Dad? Emperor? Old Man Huang? Immortal? are you still there? 】

【Hello? Hello! say! explain……】

【……】

Morgan narrowed his eyes.

Along with the beeping sound, the three characters "No Signal" appeared on the screen of Morgan's mobile phone. She looked up and saw the only signal tower on the island, standing in front of Magnus's astonishing wisdom. Burning like a pillar of fire reaching into the sky.

【……】

【……】

【……】

[Fuck. 】

——————

"So, is this what we're facing now?"

"Our house is in the sky, our food is in the boat, our boat is under the sea, our cell tower is in another world, and the closest support we can count on..."

"At least a week, Horus."

It was Guilliman who answered the Wolf God.

"Before I left, I read the nautical charts and maritime records in this area. Even if the fastest ship arrives here, it will take three days. Even if they discover something is wrong as quickly as possible and come to rescue, it will still take at least three days. One week.”

"..."

"How long will we have enough food? Didn't you grab some when you landed on the island?"

"Lorgar was carrying a column of instant coffee, Angel was holding a stack of fruit plates, Leman Russ had two tubes of mead hidden in his crotch, Morgan had ten boxes of soft cookies in his pocket, and Conrad, he He still had a half-eaten baguette in his hand: he was beating Magnus with it."

"..."

"I'm talking about dinner: don't any of us have any dinner with us?"

"Yes, when Johnson landed on the island, he picked up a plate of frozen British dishes."

"..."

"Very good, that is to say, we didn't get any dinner at all."

Horus nodded sadly.

"I never thought that my first wish of the New Year would be to survive. This is really a tragedy of some classicism: What should we do now, you say?"

"..."

"..."

【I think……】

As soon as Morgan opened her mouth, she attracted the attention of everyone present. She composed herself, and then looked around at the brothers sitting next to her, discussing this serious issue with her: they were all the relatively [reliable] ones among the original body. indivual.

[Let’s think about it: when you encounter problems that cannot be solved, what is your first reaction? 】

"..."

"Build a wall."

"Eat fruit."

"Write a holy book."

"Get yourself drunk."

"Let the galaxy burn."

【……】

[Forget it: Pretend I didn’t say anything. 】