The Happy Life of Small Officials in Northern Song Dynasty

In the morning of the next day, Xiao Temo and Liu Liufu, the principal and deputy envoys of the Liao Kingdom, really sent people to offer to continue the negotiations. . .

Su Jin sent someone back to pass on the message: I don’t talk about business today. If Liao envoys feel bored, you can stroll around Bianliang City, see the scenery of my Song Dynasty, and appreciate the prosperity of the heavenly kingdom; but you have to change into Han Chinese costumes , so as not to be attacked by the western thief assassins hidden in the city, life and death are at stake, so don't be careless.

Xiao Te cursed angrily: "I appreciate your mother's legs! I didn't come to Bianliang for sightseeing."

The Liao soldier who sent the message asked timidly: "My lord, are you going to send the message to Su Jin like this?"

Xiao Temo kicked him a somersault, and cursed: "Aren't you kidding me? Believe it or not, I chopped off your dog's leg. Get out!"

The Liao soldier hurried away, scrambling and scrambling, thinking: Fuck you, how can you ask someone to negotiate and ignore you? If you lose face of our Daliao, you will know how to take revenge on us; lose your ass , I took away all the happy money I brought with me to play with girls in Song Dynasty, I'm so fucking shameless.

Xiao Temo paced back and forth and sighed, and in a blink of an eye Liu Liufu was drinking a cup of tea with gusto, he was so angry that he stared and scolded: "You should find a way to ask you to be my deputy. , you don't do anything fucking."

Liu Liufu was embarrassed to drink from the teacup, and he said depressedly: "My lord, you are so furious that there is no way out. I am thinking of countermeasures. After being scolded by you like this, I dare not speak anymore. .”

"Don't pretend to be pitiful, this matter is not only related to me, you are also a grasshopper on this rope, if you have any ideas, please speak up."

Liu Liufu put down the teacup and said, "Your official thinks this matter is very simple. Isn't Su Jin unwilling to talk about it? This just shows that our guess yesterday was correct. On the one hand, he is delaying the time, and on the other hand, he is confident ; Think about it, even if he is not in a hurry, can the emperor of the Song Dynasty not be in a hurry? This can only be explained by the fact that the whole court of the Song Dynasty is using this dragging tactic."

"There's a use for saying these things? Could it be that the guy couldn't figure out what he was thinking? What should I do if I say something useful?"

"Well... If he doesn't come, don't we have long legs yet? Let's go to his house to block him, and make it clear to those who arrest him, can he drive us away?"

"That's right, without further ado, let's leave now." Xiao Temo started to leave.

Liu Liufu hurriedly said: "Don't worry, my lord, I'm afraid it's not good to go out hastily. Although the boy is tired and lazy, he must do the reminder; it is said that the remnants of the western thieves are still trying to assassinate us, we can Be careful."

Xiao Temo glared and said: "We have a hundred and ten people dispatched, what can the assassins do to me? You are a rat, not to mention whether there are assassins, if there are, so what? I am a mace vegetarian? "

Liu Liufu hurriedly said: "Be careful in everything. Assassins will not attack directly. If they hide on the roof of the roof and shoot a secret arrow, can you guarantee to detect it in time? What if the assassin puts some powerful poison on the arrow?" , You don’t need to hurt the vitals to kill us, aren’t we wronged? It doesn’t matter if you and I die, the court will definitely think that Song Guo killed us, and they will definitely send troops to come, won’t they Is it just a new firearm given to the Song State as a target? Then you and I will die under the nine springs, and it will be difficult to rest in peace."

"It seems to make sense, what do you think should be done?"

"The lower official thinks we still have to go out, but we also have a suspicious strategy. You take off the official uniform, and put it back on Erhu, who looks exactly like you, and ask him to take your car out; if there is Assassins, they must stay near the post to watch, and when they see your car driving out, they must follow and wait for the opportunity to strike, and when these people are lured away, you and me in Tsing Yi Xiaomao slip out through the side door, wouldn't anyone know it?"

"Good way, I didn't expect you to have some tricks, isn't it called Tiaohulishan?"

"The strategy of crossing the sea without the sky can also be called Mingxiu's strategy of crossing Chencang secretly along the plank road." Liu Liufu said shaking his head.

"Bah, I said Tiaohulishan is Tiaohulishan, don't contradict me everywhere, be careful, I will give you two big mouths."

Liu Liufu had no choice but to do errands with this rough guy, and he had endured all the anger he could have in his life, but in the past month or so, he has also cultivated the virtue of being submissive and not fighting back when he is beaten or scolded.

The two acted according to their plan, and when Xiao Erhu swaggered away in his car, guessing that there must be an assassin who did not know where he was, the two of them sneaked out of the post by opening the side door , casually hailed a carriage, and went straight to Su Jin's residence in Desheng Bridge South.

Unexpectedly, after knocking on the door for a long time, only a young maidservant in Tsing Yi poked her head out to ask questions. After the two explained their intentions, the maidservant said apologetically: "Masters, it's unfortunate that you two came here. The famous actor Song Xiaoxiao is on stage today, and the young master invited his friends to listen to the play."

Xiao Te stomped his feet angrily, but this bastard was carefree, leaving his business aside and went to listen to the play instead.

Liu Liufu winked quickly, telling Xiao Temo not to scold his mother impulsively, stepped forward and saluted, "Dare to ask my little lady, where did your son go to listen to the opera?"

Xiao Sui'er waved her hand and said: "My young master didn't say where to go to the opera, he only said that Song Xiaoxiao gave his voice, but he didn't say where the family is; the master is not at home, and the slave's house is not easy to keep guests, both of you please do it."

After saying 'Kang Dang', he closed the door and hitched it, almost smashing Liu Liufu's nose.

"My lord, what should I do?" Liu Liufu asked while touching the bridge of his sore nose.

"Look, I have to find him anyway. At least I know Song Xiaoxiao's name. Since he is so famous, there must be many people who know it. Let's ask all the way, and we will always find him."

The two had made up their minds and turned to leave.

In the crack of the door, the young maidservant in blue stared at them with wide eyes, and when she saw them leave, she just turned around and entered the room, and said to herself: "Your Majesty's calculations are accurate, so I knew they were coming, that Liao man There is so much hair on my body, I only saw my face yesterday, but today I am wearing such narrow clothes, half of my arms and trousers are exposed, all black hair, it is really scary!"

Xiao Temo and Liu Liufu went out of the alley to the street, bit the bullet and asked people along the street.

"Brother, do you know where Song Xiaoxiao is giving her voice today?"

"I don't know, don't get in the way, I haven't sold out half the basket of leeks yet."

"..."

"Brother, do you know Song Xiaoxiao who sings the song?"

"Song Xiaoxiao? An actor, I listened to Mei Lanqiu's song. It's so pitiful to see that kid pretending to be a girl. It's really painful! It's so painful to watch! It seems that the two of you are also like-minded? Hey, don't go away , let's talk, this big brother has so much hair on his body, he's really mighty."

"Go away!"

"Tch, you don't have to be so fierce if you don't like to chat? Look at the black hair on your face, you were only caught on the mountain."

"Cao your mother." Xiao Te mo raised his fist and punched, Liu Liufu quickly hugged him, and dragged him away.

The two fought repeatedly, and they asked all the way, but no one knew what Song Xiaoxiao was doing. From Desheng Bridge to Daxiangguo Temple, they asked for several streets, their mouths were dry, and the soles of their feet were worn out. Didn't ask why.

At the end, Xiao Te couldn't stop cursing, and his words became more and more aggressive. He pulled someone and asked bluntly: "Do you know Song Xiaoxiao? Don't talk, just nod or shake your head."

"Neuropathy!"

I was scolded countless times all the way, and suddenly it was like the long-dried seedlings met the rain from the sky, and it was like a winter night in the cold street, someone brought hot and fragrant rib soup, a red porch with extraordinary style, and red lanterns facing the wind At the swaying shop door, Xiao Temo heard the most beautiful and touching words of the day.

"Song Xiaoxiao? I know you, I'm too familiar with it." The one who spoke was a woman with painted eyebrows, her cheekbones were protruding, her face seemed to have been drilled into a dough pocket, and her mouth was full of the smell of garlic.

Xiao Temo grabbed the woman's hand in surprise, ignoring the smell of garlic, and shouted, "Do you really know her? Where is she?"

"It's right upstairs, sir! Oh, why don't you pinch the hand of the slave, the bones of the slave will be broken by you."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was too excited, I hope you forgive me! Is it Song Xiaoxiao who can sing? Is it here?"

"Hee hee, of course she can sing. She can sing whatever the guest officer likes to hear, such as 'Han Cicada's Desolation to Chang Ting Wan' or 'Xianyun Makes a Flying Star Spread Hate', if you don't like listening to these, you can still sing." There are other things that are more interesting, such as 'Lovesickness Five Changes', 'A Straight Seedling of Purple Bamboo'..."

Xiao Temo was overjoyed and said: "Is she here today to give her voice?"

"Hee hee, the uncle speaks really elegantly, and... still... Dedication, isn't it devotion! Hee hee! It's just today, right here, don't talk about it, I'll take you up to see her, please ask me , have you brought any money?"

"Money? Oh, I need to buy a ticket."

"Hee hee... Isn't it just 'buying piao'? The guest officer looks mighty, but speaks really elegantly. Come, come upstairs with the servant."

Xiao Temo let out a long sigh of relief, and walked inside following the writhing fat buttocks.

Liu Liufu hurriedly stopped him and said, "Big... that... big brother! It seems wrong."

"What's wrong? Come on, it's easy to find, this kid must be inside."

Liu Liufu looked up at the lintel, and on the big red signboard was written "Red Sleeve Tricks" in big three characters. This is not like a serious garden, but rather a...

Seeing that Xiao Temo had strode in, Liu Liufu had no choice but to follow in.