It's a diary

Chapter 130 3.20
Feel like going crazy.

The desire to sleep out is at an all-time high.

It's not that I can't stay any longer, it's just that I'm really tired and my heart is terribly tired.I don't want to face this mess anymore.

I would rather participate in training, certification, and competitions than stay in the classroom any longer.

The mess, the gloomy, cool weather, and the rain from time to time... all of them are so unpleasant.

It will start to heat up tomorrow, and in the next few days, the maximum temperature will rise to 32°C.

Then it rained on Friday, 26°C.

It will also rain on Saturday, with a maximum temperature of 19°C

It rained continuously until April.

In other words, I can’t go boating this weekend.Maybe I won’t be able to go back to Beiyu at the end of this month.

But there is an advantage, that is, if it rains and no one goes to the park to feed the fish, then if I feed the fish in the park, many fish will swim over.

If it keeps raining like this, I will simply wait until the Qingming Festival before going back, and take Thursday and Friday off, plus two days on the weekend.

It’s another short vacation.

I didn't dare to think this way at first, but there were two boys in the class today and they took a week off to go back to visit their graves.

Mosai suddenly opened up.

I really need a quiet environment to stay well and think about my future life plans.

I don't know what to do, I'm so sad.

I'm not happy here either.

But if I’m not happy here, then where can I be happy?
I don't understand.

At first I thought that since it was so warm this year, there would be a bumper harvest of fruits.

But, the rainy season seems to be coming.

Maybe the wind and rain have knocked all the flowers off the fruit trees, and this year there won’t even be half the usual fruit.

After so long, everything has changed.

After such a long time, everything that should be changed and things that shouldn't be changed have changed.

I can’t sleep well every day, I’m unhappy every day, and I’m sad.I feel sad, and I don’t understand why I am unhappy, and I don’t understand what constitutes happiness.

A feeling of disconnection from the world.

Recalling his chat with his classmates the night before, he said: "Queer, I always feel like you are missing something?"

Me: "There is nothing missing. Because I have learned the essence, the essence of computers, a bunch of forms with a string of codes." [嘚丝]

He said, "It's not a computer, it's you." I slapped my thigh and suddenly realized, "That's right, I need a computer!"

After three minutes of silence, the other party sent a string of ellipses, and then...

"It feels like you are lacking a little desire for things." "Let me think about it, what is missing."

Me: "I'm short of money! Ah!!"

He didn't believe it at all: "Come on, is money important to you?"

emmm, why is it not important?

I replied to him in the same way: "That must be important. If you have money, whoever wants to read this bad book will read it. I will fly to Thailand."

He: "Then you won't study if you have money? What do you think is important?"

Me: "No, if you have money, go study abroad, have fun and have fun for a few years and then you'll get a diploma."

This guy is really a talker. I regret recruiting him that day.
Him: "Then, what to play."

I found out that he was serious, and I answered his question seriously: "Go to the UK to get a master's degree, and then travel around Western Europe."

"Go to Free America to watch a gunfight, go to Australia to fight kangaroos..."

He continued to torture his soul: "Are these things important to you?" "It feels like you are missing something very important."

I went on to guess.

"Not afraid of death?"

"The vitality that a person of this age should have."

"A bright head?"

……

He said no.

I'm so angry that I want to use twisted pair to dark shark him!
"What on earth is that! What I lack most is money! And you said no!"

Finally, he found an adjective for what I had lost.

He said: "It's just that I don't feel any desire for the world." "I don't want to ask for anything from the world, a feeling of being at the mercy of fate."

It's really hard for him to choose a comprehensive science student. He came up with these few sentences, which are elegant and seem to be a bit philosophical.

I said, "Then nothing in this world belongs to me."

What he replied was: "No, this is your world, it's just yours."

(End of this chapter)