Variety shows are crazy but don't cause internal conflict; I'm proud to drive others crazy

Chapter 32 So what if I'm a PhD? I'm a lady, damn it!
"Ugh, it stinks! Who's behind me?!"

Shen Lan's muffled cry rang out, attracting everyone's attention, including that of the audience.

[Hey, what's Shen Lan doing? Why is her head buried in cow dung?]

There's no one behind him, what is he shouting about?

Shen Lan's loud shouts continued, "Help...help! Who's holding my head down?! It stinks! Let me go!"

Because he was shouting and his mouth was open, the force behind him pressed him hard into the cow dung, making Shen Lan gag and cry for help.

"Help...help!"

Shen Lan's voice was gradually muffled, and her calls became indistinct, making it difficult for others to hear her clearly.

Seeing his strange behavior, Song Wanwan was startled and quickly said to Song Shixing, "Second Brother, Shen Lan is acting very strangely. He said something is pushing him, but we didn't see anything. Please help save Shen Lan!"

Song Shixing already disliked this cheating man who was having an affair with her own sister, and after spending the last few days together on the variety show, Shen Lan's behavior was even more annoying.

Song Shixing stood there without moving. "Your own boyfriend, why don't you go save him?"

"I……"

Song Wanwan's face paled, and she bit her lip, saying, "I'm not strong enough, I'm afraid I can't lift him."

Actually, it was because it smelled too bad; Shen Lan's face and body were covered in feces!

Jiang Nanxi said quietly, "Song Wanwan, if you don't go save him soon, he'll suffocate and die. Are you just going to watch your teammate die in front of you?"

At that moment, a vengeful spirit pressed down hard on the back of Shen Lan's head, shoving his entire face into the pile of cow dung. Shen Lan struggled, flailing his arms, but couldn't break free.

Seeing this bizarre scene, Song Wanwan couldn't help but say, "I can't do this by myself, can't someone come and help me?"

"Why should I help you? He's your boyfriend, not mine."

After Jiang Nanxi finished speaking, Song Wanwan's tears fell down in a steady stream. "But...but this is also a human life! Jiang Nanxi, you are too cruel!"

Jiang Nanxi rolled her eyes.

Too lazy to pay attention to her.

Seeing this, Song Shixing said impatiently, "Alright, stop crying, and stop trying to morally blackmail others! I'll go with you to drag him away, come here quickly!"

The two walked towards Shen Lan, grabbing his arms from both sides, trying to pull him up.

A vengeful spirit suddenly entered Shen Lan's body. His eyes flashed red, and he suddenly shook off Song Shixing and Song Wanwan's hands with great force.

Bang.

Shen Lan's body slammed back to the ground, his face buried in the cow dung again. He then burrowed his face into the dung while shouting, "Get away from me! Don't touch me! It's delicious, so delicious! I love it! The kids love it!"

Song Wanwan: ? ? ?

Song Shixing: ? ? ?

audience:!!!
[Huh? Hahahaha, what the hell? So Shen Lan wanted to eat shit?]

"Hey bro, your hobby is pretty unique. No wonder you were talking so tough earlier."

[Shen Lan, did you notice everyone else had fainted, so you got up and secretly ate shit, thinking no one would find out?]

Seeing Shen Lan's behavior, Jiang Nanxi was also startled, and then realized that he was possessed.

Jiang Nanxi couldn't help but give that ghost brother a thumbs up in her heart. He was really going all out to repay his debt of gratitude!
Shen Lan's voice came again, "Haha, it's so delicious, so delicious, I love it! I'll eat it all!"

Standing to the side, Song Wanwan's legs went weak at the sight. "Shen Lan, what's wrong? Can you please stop eating? I'm scared!"

"Haha, delicious, delicious!"

"Shen Lan, wake up!"

"I'll eat, I'll eat!" Seeing Shen Lan's crazy actions, Song Wanwan couldn't stand it anymore and pulled his arm hard again, trying to drag him away from this place.

As a result, Shen Lan grabbed a lump of poop and threw it at Song Wanwan's face. "Do you want some too? Here, have some, eat up!"

"Ahhh!"

Song Wanwan immediately jumped up and broke down, "Shen Lan, you bastard, what are you doing! How dare you treat me like this? I want to break up with you!"

pat.

Shen Lan threw another lump of something in her face.

"Ah ah ah ah ah!"

Song Wanwan screamed and ran away, and then Shen Lan got up, grabbed a pile of cow dung, and chased after her, throwing it at her repeatedly.

"Hey, don't come any closer!"

"Shen Lan, be good, you eat it yourself, don't give it to us!"

"Run! Run! Shen Lan has gone mad!"

The others quickly moved away from them.

When the rescue team and police arrived, Shen Lan collapsed to the ground, while Song Wanwan remained squatting on the ground, sobbing uncontrollably.

These people all returned to the guesthouse with the rescue team, while Jiang Nanxi led the police to the human traffickers' hideout and rescued the others.

It was already dark when we got back to the guesthouse.

When Jiang Nanxi entered the guesthouse, she saw Song Wanwan sitting on the sofa in the living room, still crying, while Shen Lan stood not far away, seemingly at a loss.

Both of them had washed themselves clean, but there was still a lingering smell on them, especially on Shen Lan.

Shen Lan tried several times to approach Song Wanwan to apologize and comfort her, but each time Song Wanwan roared at him to get lost, showing how angry she was with Shen Lan.

After a while, the director came over with the staff. "I'm here to see the mushrooms everyone picked and start tallying today's points."

Everyone was taken over by the mushrooms.

Liu Qingyan X Song Shixing +215
Jiang Nanxi X Li Chu +481
Song Wanwan X Shen Lan +1389
When the other guests saw the score tallied by Song Wanwan and Shen Lan's team, they were all shocked and stared blankly at the wild Ganoderma lucidum among a pile of mushrooms.

"No, when did you pick the Ganoderma? Our three teams went together. Logically speaking, if you could pick the Ganoderma, we should have been able to see it too."

Song Wanwan said, "I spotted it with my sharp eyes, but I didn't tell you. I secretly picked some while you were picking other mushrooms."

After she finished speaking, she glanced at Jiang Nanxi and said, "After all, some people like to snatch things. What if they see the Ganoderma lucidum and take it away?"

Jiang Nanxi picked up the Ganoderma lucidum, glanced at it, and scoffed, "This is not a wild Ganoderma lucidum at all. This thing doesn't grow in the area where we pick mushrooms. It's artificially cultivated."

Song Wanwan said with dissatisfaction, "Are you jealous that we got so many points? The experts the director invited all said it was wild Ganoderma lucidum. Do you think you know more than the experts?"

The expert who was identifying the fungi spoke up.

“This is indeed a wild Ganoderma lucidum. I have been engaged in research in this field for many years and am a PhD in a related major from a well-known university in China. The person next to me is my student, who is currently pursuing a master’s degree in this major. We both recognize that this Ganoderma lucidum is wild, and there is no mistake.”

Song Wanwan: "Did you hear that? They have doctoral and master's degrees in this field. Who do you think you are? You dare to raise any questions?"

Jiang Nanxi: "Are PhDs and Masters so impressive? Are PhDs and Masters immune to making mistakes? Are PhDs and Masters immune to lying? I have an even more impressive identity than them, and it will scare you to death when I tell you."

The expert retorted, "Then what is your professional background? Tell me about it."

"I am a lady."

"...?"

"What are PhDs and Masters? They're all trash who lie against their conscience. What's so great about them? I'm a great lady, and you bunch of bastards were all born of a lady."
Without ladies, there would be no you. It's an incredible blessing for you all to have such an outstanding woman like me filming here with you.

director:?
expert:?
audience:?
(End of this chapter)