Funny: The Hilarious Life of a Wasted Taoist 1

Chapter 42
"Since it's an eight-diagram formation, there must be a formation eye. Find the opponent's eye and you can break the formation." Yun Mei said, "It's a pity that this eight-diagram formation is unfathomable. We have studied it for a long time and have not figured out where the formation eye is."

"That's all right," I said, "as long as there's a way out."

"Since I used that talisman to go back last time." The man head said, "My brother gave me that talisman again, as long as I find my brother and ask him about the origin of the talisman, maybe we will know how to get out. "

Wang Liang said, "The problem is that your younger brother is missing, and we don't know where he is."

"Speaking of which, there is one more thing." Yun Mei said again, "We asked Gou Fugui to check the biography of Guan Xing and the others who came here that year, and found that in the life and death book, except for one person who was struck to death by lightning, The rest, including Guan Xing, were all killed by bandits on the way to Beijing."

It's different from life and death!
I was taken aback, and was about to ask further, when suddenly the picture blurred in front of me, and the portraits of Sanniang and Yunmei disappeared.

Why did this Pixiu disappear at a critical moment!I anxiously shook the Pixiu jade pendant and said, "Don't sleep, let them finish talking."

"It's not that I don't have enough spiritual power," Pai Yao said, "It's that Yin energy is approaching!"

What Yin Qi?Before I saw anything, I suddenly heard the man's head shout loudly: "Guan Wu!"

Following the direction of the man's head, I saw a ghost with a big Qing Dynasty braid and ancient coarse clothes standing not far away looking at us.

The younger brother of the man's head - Guan Wu!
After waiting for so long, this man, no, this ghost finally came out.

We were all very excited to see him.

He has a talisman that can break a man's head back from the formation, so apart from this talisman, he must know something else!
Seeing his younger brother, Guan Xing was more excited than us. He couldn't physically hug him, so he could only rush up and touch his younger brother with his forehead, and shouted, "Guan Wu! You finally came out! It's been hundreds of years, and I've been looking for you." It's so hard!"

Guan Wu shed two tears of blood: "Brother, I'm sorry." His voice was a little hoarse, and it sounded like a teenager's voice changing.

Guan Xing said happily: "It's all a family. I'm sorry. As long as I find you, I will have the face to take you down to reincarnate to meet our parents."

Guan Wu said: "Brother, you have already gone out, so you should reincarnate properly. I am sorry for you in the first place, so why bother to come back to me."

"You gave me the talisman, how can I escape alone, we are brothers, no one can be left behind. And for the past 100 years, I have been thinking, maybe you are not dead, but still alive." Guan Xing asked , "How the hell did you die?"

Guan Wu avoided answering, and said: "Brother, you shouldn't come, there are many things, but I don't want you to know."

I said, "Little brother, this is your fault. Your brother ran in to look for you without fear of danger. You showed yourself to others, but not to your brother, and let your brother look for you everywhere. His head fell off again and again. Is it plausible? Huh?"

Guan Wu just repeated: "You shouldn't have come."

The man asked strangely, "Why?"

Guan Wu raised his face full of blood and tears and said, "Okay, brother, if you want to know, I'll tell you all about it."

After speaking, he disappeared without a trace.

Seeing that Guan Wu was gone, Guan Xing looked around anxiously and shouted, "Guan Wu! Guan Wu!"

After he yelled twice, the whole small second floor suddenly went dark.

"The light is broken?" I quickly walked to the light rope and stretched out my hand to touch it for a long time.

It's not the first time to discredit and turn on the light, but this time I can't touch the light cord anyway.

When I was wondering, Wang Liang called out: "Horsepower, look quickly."

What are you looking at blindly?I was just wondering, when I suddenly heard a 'squeak' door opening on the second floor, and a man shouted: "You drink first, I'll go out to pee."

Another said: "You're a piss pot, two sips a day and you have to run every day! What a fucking bore!"

Another cursed: "Fuck your grandpa."

Then I saw a black shadow coming down from the stairs unsteadily.

Is there anyone else in this building?We were all startled and looked at the man with breathless concentration.

The man didn't seem to see us, he went down the stairs completely ignoring us, and walked out humming a ditty drunkenly.

He smelled of alcohol, walked to the door and knocked on the door, kicked the door cursingly before going out.At this time, my eyes were already used to the darkness, and I could vaguely see that the man was wearing an ancient soldier's cap crookedly on his head, and a whip hanging from the back of his head.

The man's head rushed out immediately, and shouted: "Master, don't go out, there are ghosts outside!"

As soon as my brain lit up, I immediately understood that this was the soldier who was the man's head at that time!

Wang Liang and I went out immediately, and saw two stone lions standing outside the door at some point, with the heads of the lions facing the small second floor.

The soldier didn't go far. After walking a few steps, he took off his pants and began to pee.The man kept his head next to him and said repeatedly: "Master, it's too dangerous outside, let's go back."

The soldier acted as if he didn't hear it, and concentrated on humming an out-of-tune ditty to piss: "Put your hand out to touch the side of my sister's face, and the dark clouds flew across the sky for a long time..."

Guan Xing yelled: "Master! Master!"

The soldier shivered for a moment, then turned to look at us.

Guan Xing said happily: "Master, it's dangerous outside, let's go back..."

Before he finished speaking, he saw the soldier laughing and asked inarticulately, "You, why did you come out?"

At this time, I heard a somewhat hoarse boy's voice outside answering: "Come out and pee."

"Okay...ok..." The soldier turned his head again and said with a smile, "One, pee together..."

Guan Xing suddenly turned his head to look at the door, the person standing there was none other than his younger brother——Guan Wu!
With hands behind his back, Guan Wu walked behind Bing Cha with a smile on his face: "I'm not in a hurry, Master Cha, you go first." Bing Cha responded without turning his head.

"Why." Guan Xing said to himself strangely, "Why didn't Guan Wu tell me that he also saw the soldiers when he came down."

I said, "What else is there to say, he lied to you."

Guan Xing asked again: "Why did he lie to me?"

I can't answer this question, and I don't need to answer it, because we will see the answer in the next moment.

I saw Guan Wu pulled out his hand hidden behind his back, and in his hand was actually holding a long iron rod. Guan Wu used that iron rod to hit the soldier with force and without hesitation!
There was only a muffled sound, and the soldier fell down in response.

Guan Xing exclaimed, "Guan Wu! What are you doing!"

Guan Wu obviously couldn't hear his words, the hand holding the iron rod was still trembling, he panted heavily and looked at the soldier, then as if he had made a decision, he took off the soldier's clothes and put it on his body, and immediately He picked up the iron rod and thrust it hard into Bingcha's chest!

He didn't have enough strength, so he pierced that piece of blood until he completely pierced the soldier's body with the iron rod.

That soldier was stabbed to death by him!

We were all so shocked by the accident that we couldn't speak, the man's head was even more unbelievable, and said: "Guan Wu, what are you doing?"

Finally, Guan Wu took off his blood-stained coat, tore it up and put it back on the dead soldier, wiped his face vigorously to wipe off the blood on his face, he was relieved, and went into the room trembling. run.

Seeing this, our eyes flickered, the two stone lions at the door of the small second floor disappeared, and the light in the living room shone through the door.

Guan Wu stood at the door and watched us.

"So that's how the blood on your hand came from!" The man looked at Guan Wu, shaking his head angrily, "At the beginning, I only wondered why such a strong official died quietly, but now I want to come , it turned out that he was not on guard because he knew you!"

Guan Wu lowered his head sadly, and after a long while, he nodded lightly.

"Father and mother sent you to read sage books because they want you to honor the Guan family in the future!" Guan Xing yelled angrily, "Our Guan family is poor, but we have never done anything without conscience! You are doing us wrong. Parents!"

Guan Wu said softly: "Brother, I know I was wrong..."

Wang Liang asked, "How did the rest of them die?"

Guan Xing said, "Could it be you who killed him too?"

Guan Wu nodded again.

Guan Xing was furious, and because he had no hands to beat him, he could only rush up and hit him with his head: "I will kill you bastard on behalf of our Guan family!"

Guan Wu didn't hide either, he just stood there and let Guan Xing bump into him, his little body was about to be knocked out of his wits.I looked strange, and quickly grabbed the hair of the man's head: "Wait a minute."

The man scolded: "Wait, I'm his brother, even if he beats him to death, he won't complain."

I said: "You have to ask first, how did your younger brother kill another official with his small body?"

The man said, "Yes, you can't beat that soldier."

Guan Wu said: "I knew he would drink at night, so I put medicine in his drink. Brother, you slept so hard because I put sweat medicine in the dry food that I gave us. I was afraid that you would get suspicious, so I put medicine on him. The soldier's body was dismembered, so that you will be more convinced that it is haunted."

Guan Xing was stunned for a moment: "Then who killed me? You were clearly in front of me when I was killed."

Guan Wu lowered his head again and said, "Brother, it's all my fault."

He said, and floated back to the house.

We quickly followed and ran back. Just as we stepped into the small second floor, our eyes went dark, and the light of the fluorescent lamp disappeared again. The difference was that this time there was a candle lit on the table in the center of the house. The decoration is obviously not the decoration on the second floor of my small house. There are a few wooden tables scattered here and there, which looks like a restaurant.

However, our eyes were not attracted by the decorations on the table, but all fell to the ground next to the candles, where the young Guan Wu was dismembering the dead officers and soldiers with a knife, blood was all over the ground.

I have seen chickens and pigs slaughtered, but I have never seen people mutilated.

Guan Wu's soul was standing aside, silently watching what he had done during his lifetime.Although Yang Xu was holding the scalpel all the time, he must have never seen such an unprofessional chopping, and he was trembling with fright.

Wang Liang asked, "Don't you feel afraid of killing people?"

Guan Wu said: "I was scared when I killed the first one, but I was much calmer when I killed the second one."

No wonder every country is cracking down on juvenile delinquency.

Guan Wu suddenly turned his head and looked towards the second floor. We followed where he was looking.

If it wasn't for him looking, it would be really hard for us to find that a head was protruding from the wall on the second floor, looking towards this side.

Guan Xing seemed to understand something suddenly, he let out an ah, and looked over there blankly.

The head looked at it for a while, then retracted again.

When we looked back, we saw that Guan Wu, who was cutting the officers and soldiers below, had disappeared, and there were only severed limbs and intestines left on the ground.

Wang Liang glanced at it and began to retch, saying, "I won't be able to eat meat anymore."

I feel a little regretful and wish Reddy Gaga was here. He can save me a lot of money when he sees this scene.

There was a slight sound of the wooden floor upstairs again, as if someone was walking carefully, and we looked up again.

The sound stopped for a while, and then a person touched the wall and walked down lightly from above.

I looked at the man and said, "Guan Xing, that man really looks like you!"

Guan Xing said: "That's me! That day I heard movement outside, so I came out to have a look!"

Guan Wu said: "This is what happened on the day my brother died."

After Guan Xing got down, he first looked at the middle table with some dry food and half a bottle of wine. He seemed to be taken aback, took two steps back, turned around suddenly, and looked around vigilantly.Then the body paused again, then turned around, pointed to the table and said, "You...you..."

At this moment, there was a rush of footsteps upstairs.

"Guan Wu, don't come out!" Guan Xing yelled, turned around and ran, at this moment a black figure suddenly sprang out from the dark space behind him, slashing at Guan Xing's neck with a knife!
Guan Xing's head detached from his body, rolled down, landed on the amulet, and disappeared with a whoosh.

"Brother!" Guan Wu wailed heart-piercingly on the stairs.

We collectively stared at the black figure that jumped out. He stood with his back to us. He was very thin, his body was shaking constantly, he looked a little taller than Guan Wu, and he was still holding the knife tightly in his hand.

Guan Xing immediately recognized the person: "The other student who was with us at that time! It turned out that he was responsible for the movement I heard that day!"

"Brother!" Guan Wu ran down from upstairs, crying bitterly while hugging Guan Xing's body.

The student sneered, "Why are you crying?"

Guan Wu raised his head, his eyes were red with anger, and shouted: "Why did you kill my brother!"

The male student said: "If I don't kill him, am I waiting for you to kill me?"

Guan Wu trembled, and asked, "What did you say?"

"Don't pretend!" The male student held the knife in both hands, pointed at Guan Wu and said, "I have suspected you from the very beginning. You were the only one who went downstairs that day, but a poor man died that day, so the next day you gave Guan Wu a second chance. I didn't eat anything, as expected, I saw you kill another bad guy at night!"

Guan Wu was surprised: "Did you see it?"

The male student said, "The two bad guys are dead. If I don't kill you, your next target will be me!"

Guan Wu wiped away tears, took out a knife from his chest and said, "That's right, but I did it, it has nothing to do with my brother, why did you kill my brother!"

The male student said: "You two are brothers!"

Guan Wu howled, and said: "You can kill me if you want, why kill my brother!"

"It's not just your brother, you have to die too!" The male student gritted his teeth and rushed forward, threw Guan Wu to the ground, and stabbed him several times. Guan Wu's chest was completely soaked in blood, but he struggled hard, He pulled out a stool and threw it at the male student's head. The male student's forehead was hit, blood was flowing, and he subconsciously wiped it with his hands. At this moment, Guan Wu stabbed the male student's chest with a knife without hesitation. .

The male student screamed and fell to the ground clutching his chest, gasping for breath, but his eyes gradually lost focus.Guan Wu smiled and said: "My brother is innocent, you killed my brother, I want you to pay for my brother's life!" After speaking, he stood up, staggered towards Guan Xing's body, muttering something in his mouth: "Brother ……I'm sorry……"

Before you finished speaking, you fell to the ground with a plop and did not move.

Well, all dead.I looked at the corpses all over the place, and couldn't help saying: "This is so boring, isn't it fun to kill and kill, look, it's all gone."

Guan Xing's eye circles were red, and he asked, "Guan Wu, why did you do this?"

Guan Xing's words also asked us our doubts. Guan Wu doesn't seem to be a vicious person. How could a quiet and powerless scholar start killing people?And judging from his actions, the killing of the two officials was premeditated.

Guan Wu wiped his eyes and asked, "Brother, do you still remember the person we met when we were young?"

Guan Xing said: "I have met so many people, how can I remember them?"

"You should remember." Guan Wu pointed to his shaved half-bald head and said, "Although he also has long hair, he didn't have the front hair but he didn't shave it off. Because mother said that if he didn't shave the front hair, he would be beheaded. , so at that time we were very scared and didn’t dare to talk to him, but he greeted us, and as soon as we heard him talk, we couldn’t help but want to get close to him, and our guard was gone.”

"Ah!" Guan Xing said, "I remembered! I remember him. Although he has hair, there is no one around every time he appears, so although we have met many times, no one has ever seen him."

People can be recognized just by whether they are partly bald. There is only one dynasty in ancient and modern China and abroad.

"I still remember we asked him what that man did and why he didn't shave his hair, but I couldn't understand what he said. Although you are younger than me, you are smart and can understand the nonsense he said, so Every time you talk, I go to the side and play by myself." Guan Xing asked again: "But how long has it been, why are you bringing this up?"

"Brother, you don't know if you didn't listen to him." Guan Wu said, "That man told me a lot of stories, and taught me some simple five elements and gossip. Maybe everything is doomed somewhere, he told me What impressed me the most among the words was the matter of a house.”

"House?" Wang Liang asked, "What did he say?"

"He said that the house was set up with a formation, which would automatically activate every time. At that time, people would come to the house for various reasons. Once they entered, they could not get out. They could only stay in the house. dying slowly."

I shuddered and asked, "You want to say that the house is the small second floor?"

Guan Wu nodded.

Guan Xing said: "Don't say that you were young at the time, and you may not remember things clearly after many years. Even if you did, how would you know this is the house he was talking about?"

Guan Wu said: "I remember very clearly. He said that the house has two characteristics. One is that people trapped in that house will see the countdown without exception. The second point is that those people who are trapped can't get out What comes out is a thick fog that can't be seen."

all hit!

I covered my face in pain, and I said, why is there such a good thing, a relative gave me a house, it turned out to be a haunted house!
There are ghosts and goblins, I can still influence them with love, and the whole difficult formation is used to frame me. Even Thomas, who spins 35 degrees and rotates in the air for [-] and a half weeks, probably can't solve it. This is not forcing me to do it. Do you want to learn the Taoism of those Lao Shizi?

I said, "He told you so much, did he tell you how to crack it?"

Guan Wu said: "I was young at the time, and when I heard what he said was so scary, I was scared, so I asked him, 'What should I do if this happens to me?' The man looked at me for a while, shook his head, and sighed. , gave me an amulet and said to me: 'Use this amulet and you can get out'."

Guan Xing shouted: "It's the amulet you gave me! You said it was my mother who begged to give it to you."

"If I don't say that, you will definitely ask for details. I was not sure at the time, and I was afraid that I would make you worry if I told you." Guan Wu said, "When I entered this small second floor that day, I inexplicably remembered the story told by that man. , so I gave you the amulet. After a few days, when I saw those numbers and the fog outside, I became more certain that this is where the man said."

"No wonder..." the man said, "No wonder... We didn't have any big associations when we saw the marks on the wall, but you immediately thought it was a number."

"But you have amulets, so you can go out?" Wang Liang said, "Why do you want to kill people?"

"I took the amulet at the time, and I was very happy in my heart. I said that with this, everyone can go out. But the man laughed and said that there is no such good thing, the amulet can only let one person go out." Guan Wu said, "Then I asked 'What about the others, what do they do if they want to get out?' The man said: 'Those who are chosen are all sacrifices, and if they want to get out, they have to be sacrificed with blood. It takes three people to escape for one person blood.'" Guan Wu paused, "But when I found out that my brother and I were in this house, I only had one amulet."

Yang Xu, who had been listening to us, couldn't help interjecting: "So you killed them?"

(End of this chapter)