leave this sad place

Chapter 122 Hard Reading
The car was speeding on the highway, and the scenery outside the window flew by Yiyi.There was a bit of indescribable pain and firmness in Ouyang's eyes.

This time, it's time to start school again.This time, he must study hard in school!Otherwise, what he thought would really be nothing but fantasy.

It is still a procedural registration process, and it is still the same as reporting to the indifferent head teacher, and the dormitory is still the same dormitory as before.

Ouyang felt a lot of emotion again.Every semester, every semester is like this, there is not much change at all.And him?What about himself?

Ouyang sighed heavily, looked around the school, and took a step, heavy and firm!
"A new issue, a new beginning!" He sat on his bed and took out his textbook, looking at it with burning eyes.This semester, he will work several times, ten times harder!
The white clouds are floating, elegant and ethereal, overlooking the world, seeming to mock and ridicule.The world is impermanent, and the things in the world are not so simple.

Too much whimsy, too much helplessness!There are far more unsatisfactory people than happy people.

"It's a new semester for my son, study hard and don't let me worry about it outside." Ouyang stood on the balcony and looked at the starry sky outside the window, and then his mother called him.

"Well, I will study hard." Ouyang's voice was a little low, and his heart was heavy and serious.

"As long as you do your best, you should relax when it's time to relax." Mother's words came from the other end.Ouyang was slightly taken aback, not knowing what she meant.

"Oh." He hesitated.

"Actually, I'm also doing it for your own good. I don't want you to come out and be as tired as I am." She seemed to be explaining what she didn't say clearly just now.

"Then - when do you usually rest and get up?" Ouyang hesitated, not knowing whether to use "Mom" or "You", he really didn't want to say such a word.Because his heart still hurts until now, the hurt he suffered when he was a child made him subconsciously avoid words such as parents, and even the words with a trace of connection made him involuntarily fear.He is avoiding, avoiding these like the plague, avoiding these injuries that can remind him of painful memories!
"I usually don't go to bed until eleven o'clock in the evening, and I have to get up at six or seven o'clock in the morning." The mother's tone revealed the hardships of her life, and there was even a trace of complaint.

"Oh." There was an indescribably weird feeling in Ouyang's voice.

"It's getting late, son, go to bed early."

"Oh." Ouyang listened to his mother hang up the phone, and looked up at the stars outside the window.

What his mother said just now made him feel contradictory and made him feel a little depressed!Those words are a bit out of line.

"You want me to study hard, and you tell me to relax when it's time to relax. Then when is the time to relax?" Ouyang's heart seems to be gathering sulkiness. You must know that this semester, he will not even take 10 minutes after class. I didn't let it go, I stayed in my seat to read and review.What he thinks is studying hard is refusing to let go of every minute, so how can he relax?
"Tired?" There was a bit of sarcasm on the corner of his mouth, he didn't know why his mother complained that she was tired in front of him.And he never told her about the pain in his heart and his current tiredness.And now he basically doesn't go to bed until around two o'clock every night, and he has to get up at six o'clock in the morning to do morning exercises, and he can only take a nap at noon.Sometimes I was so sleepy in class that I even opened my eyelids with my hands!
Isn't he tired?He felt a little bitter in his heart. He had never told her these things, but she only knew her own tiredness.

Ouyang felt even more depressed, because what she said to him still put him under pressure!He felt a little heavier on his shoulders, and she could complain about this to him, but he would never tell her about his situation.Because he will still support the whole family in the future, why would he shrink back and show weakness now?
Ouyang looked at the stars outside the window, the starlight twinkled like that playful smile.The anguish in his heart eased slightly, but his heart was still heavy.

He looked at the time and it was almost eleven o'clock, and the lights in the dormitory had already been turned off.He gently pushed open the door of the bedroom, took out his own basin, and poured a basin of cold water. He wanted to wake himself up, because he would continue to study for two or three hours at night.

Ouyang looked at the textbook in his hand by the light of the desk lamp, frowning slightly.Putting his feet in the icy cold water, it was bitingly cold, he sighed softly, but let his feet completely immerse in the cold water.Although it is very cold, it can make his head clearer.

"Just think of it as training yourself." He said silently in his heart, but the corners of his mouth couldn't help but gasp.Those few days in the first month were when the weather was the coldest, and people usually wore down jackets, but he used cold water to soak his feet.

As the night gradually deepened, Ouyang felt that his feet were numb from the cold, and the corners of his mouth twitched unceasingly when he moved a little, and the muscles on his face were always tense.

The light of the desk lamp gradually dimmed, and the snoring of the roommates started again and again.Ouyang looked at the time and it was going to be a little bit soon.

He put down the book in his hand and carefully moved his feet out of the water.Under the dim light, he saw that his entire foot was red and swollen.

"What a fool, just soak it in cold water, why have you soaked it until now?" He felt a little funny, as if he was stimulated.Perhaps those words of his mother gave him a great stimulus virtually.

He put on the slippers, but when he stepped off the ground, it was a bone-piercing pain.His brow furrowed again.

"Could it be that I can't even bear this little pain?" He gritted his teeth and let out some "

cluck" sound.

He poured out the cold water in the basin, went to the window and looked at the stars and moon outside the window.It felt like they were friends he met in the dark, they could bring him a little bit of warmth.

"Now you are the only ones who accompany me." He sighed softly. For these things that glow in the dark, he always feels kind from his heart, and he is willing to open his heart to them.

Another chill hit, and the temperature at night was getting lower and lower, as if it was going to freeze the whole world.Ouyang moved his feet slightly, but there was still some pain.To himself, he was a little ruthless just now.

Taking out his phone, he checked the time again, it was past one.

He sighed softly again, looked at the stars and moon in the night sky seriously again, and carefully climbed into his bed.

The roaring snoring of roommates was still in my ears, but the lower body was cold.The chill on the soles of the feet seemed to be slowly spreading upwards along the calves and thighs.How could he fall asleep like this?
Naturally, he took out his phone again and flipped through the downloaded novels.At this time of night, he was usually reading novels.How could he easily forget his ideal?
"Just treat it as your own accumulation for the future." He comforted himself and let himself let go of the urge to write novels.Because he thinks it is not the time yet, and there is not so much time now.

But the impulsiveness that didn't know when it appeared never stopped, and it was always churning and turbulent in his heart.This made him feel sad when he thought that he had to study hard now.

The conflict between reality and ideal is very tormenting, making him use his reason to suppress his emotions again and again.Such a feeling of confinement made his heart more depressed, and made him look a little melancholy and haggard.

"Be patient and let it pass, isn't it only a little over a year?" He comforted himself again, looking at the novel in his hand, letting himself sink into that virtual world.It would distract him from thinking about it so much, and relieve him of some of the tormenting grief.

"It's past two o'clock." He glanced at the time again, but his feet were still cold.

"I can't watch it anymore." He turned off his mobile phone, thinking that he would have to get up for class and study tomorrow, so he couldn't stay up too late.

He curled up, and the thin quilt couldn't give him the slightest warmth.

"Sleep, you won't be cold when you fall asleep." He comforted himself, but he didn't feel that these words were so naive!
(End of this chapter)