leave this sad place

Chapter 170
"Will it be?" she murmured subconsciously.

Who can really say for sure about the misty future?Maybe there will be a turnaround, maybe there is no hope at all.But people can't help but have beautiful fantasies about it. Perhaps the sad heart needs these little dreams to comfort it.

Ouyang fell silent again. He didn't know whether he should tell her his decision at this time, but he always felt that it was a bit cruel.

"But some things need to be cruel." He murmured silently in his heart, maybe this would make her feel that she was not worthy of what she had paid at all.And some problems can be solved early, and they can be relieved earlier.

"Can I discuss something with you?" Ouyang, who was silent for a while, asked her again, knowing that he must tell this matter this time.

"Just say what you want to say." She recovered and looked at him, secretly laughing in her heart that she actually believed what he said: there will be a way when the time comes.

"Can I not read?" He was silent, and then tried hard to speak firmly in a calm voice, and then he fell silent again after speaking.To her, such a sentence was no less than a thunderclap in her ears, and his silence seemed to be waiting for her final judgment.

"Are you joking?" She subconsciously asked him with a smile, and looked at his quiet face again, showing no sign of joking.She looked into his eyes again, they were deep and firm, and she seemed to understand something in an instant.

"Is that the way you said? It's just messing around!" She yelled angrily, and her face was full of anger!He looked at Ouyang again, and saw that he didn't have the slightest expression, he was completely indifferent!
"You don't study, you don't study. You say you don't study, who are you sorry? You have worked so hard to raise you, and you are about to take the college entrance examination, but you actually say you don't study! Such irresponsible words , how can you say it? Have you thought about your grandparents in your hometown? Have you thought about me? Don’t you know that all our hopes are placed on you, and we wholeheartedly hope that you will study hard and be able to do well in the future? Are you out of character? But what about you? How can you say such a thing?" As she spoke, her eye sockets became a little red, and there were faint lights flickering.

The reason why she put in so much effort and worked so hard to work outside is for Ouyang to have a better future.But now, he ruined his future, saying that he didn't study anymore.How can this be possible?You must know that it is her sustenance, her spiritual pillar!Such a sentence is enough to penetrate layers of barriers and deeply rooted in her heart.

"I know I'm sorry and let you down by doing this. But, I really don't want to go back to school." Ouyang gritted his teeth and said firmly. At this time, he could only hold on to the end.Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain, this is a helpless thing!

"Let it go? How could you let it go!" She shook her head slowly, her eyes became redder and she bit her lips subconsciously, and said hoarsely: "Since I was a child, I have never eaten or drank much. Don't give you a little bit? It's not like I can buy you whatever you want. Materially, I think I can still be worthy of you. The only thing I lack is emotionally, but you have thought about going out without me and working hard for most of your life. Who is it for? When I went out at that time, I was forced to go out, and I had no choice but to - can I not go out?" As she spoke, tears flowed down her eyes.

Ouyang remained silent, even though he gritted his teeth, he didn't want to show a touch of emotion.

"You grew up with your grandparents, and I seldom come back to see you, and there is a lack of communication, so the emotions may be naturally weakened. But when you asked me to come back last semester, didn't I quit my job and run away immediately?" I'm back. Didn't I do this because I was thinking of you, and I hope you can study hard? Even if you don't think about me, can't you think about your grandpa? Do you still remember the time when you were promoted to high school in junior high school? ?Your grandfather doesn’t know your grades. He saw that other people’s children have received admission letters one after another, but you haven’t. He was so anxious that he couldn’t eat or sleep, and kept chanting : What's the matter? You said you stopped studying, and if he found out, then, wouldn't you be in a hurry? " Her voice choked up, and she looked at Ouyang still indifferently. I really wonder if his heart is made of iron and stone, how can it be so hard?

Ouyang felt a twinge of pain in his heart. He really wanted to tell her right away that it was just a joke of his own, and it was not true. He would never say such things again, and he would definitely study hard, and he would never let you down!But such words, he resisted, how could he not let himself say it.

"Haha——" Ouyang raised his head and laughed, since this is already the case, why not let yourself do it more thoroughly.

"What are you laughing at? Do you still have your reasons?" She watched him laugh nervously, feeling inexplicably flustered.

"Reason? Hehe—reason! You keep saying that it's for my good, but have you thought about it from my perspective? Do you know what I really need? Your so-called material satisfaction, I It's not rare at all! Those emotions that have long been lost are not what you can make up for now! One year, ten years, even a lifetime, once lost, there will really be no more! Do you understand?" Ouyang Her voice was like a cuckoo weeping blood, and every word she said made her heart tremble uncontrollably.But his heart is even more painful, some words can not only hurt her, but also hurt himself!And there are some words that he has no choice but to do!

The smile on his face became even more sinister, and he said with a smile to her: "You said I didn't think about you, but what about you? Did you think about me again? From childhood to adulthood, to Now, you are always so self-righteous, and have you ever considered your feelings? You always tell me to study hard, study hard, as if learning is really that simple. If you learn well, you should take it for granted. It’s good that I failed you! Have you ever thought about how much pressure you put on me when I failed you? You keep telling me to relax, don’t be so nervous, but I wish I could study hard! You How do you want me to study? Every day I go to bed later than you and wake up earlier than you. Have I ever complained to you? But what about you? You always say to me How tired you are, how hard you are! Is it true that only you will be tired and I will not be tired? Let me tell you clearly, I am tired too, and my heart is even more tired!"

She seemed to want to open her mouth to say something, but continued to secretly wipe tears there.

"Forcing something on me time and time again, regardless of whether I want it or not, everything is just for my own good, for my future! Study hard, study hard, you know me How much effort and pressure do you have to put in for these few words? Say that I am withdrawn, that I am introverted, that I keep everything in my heart without saying anything, do you really think who would naturally like themselves like a piece of wood? Are you silent? Why am I like this, don’t you notice it? Everything about me now, my character now, isn’t it all forced out by you?” Ouyang’s voice was a little hoarse , the pain in his heart deepened, and he couldn't tell why he was in pain.

"To be honest, sometimes I really feel very tired; sometimes I just can't figure out why you gave birth to me? Why did you give birth to me in such a family?" Ouyang's voice became lower.

(End of this chapter)