The years I was a birdman

Chapter 3 Isn't This a Dream?

At this moment, Zhang Shifei really wanted to refresh himself and slapped himself a few times. This is a dream, it must be a dream!Otherwise, it wouldn't be such a nonsense!That's right, I'm right!Zhang Shifei thought of such and such in his mind.

At this moment, Li Lanying wiped his eyes vigorously. He looked at the big green unknown bird in front of him, thinking over and over in his head, is this a chicken?It must be chicken!Otherwise, he wouldn't be so fat, right?
Obviously, the two people's thoughts are so different that they can't get along with each other. Li Lanying hasn't realized the changes in his body yet. He caught the big green bird in front of him by surprise, and then called out excitedly. Said: "Old Zhang, come here!! See what I'm holding?!"

Zhang Shifei was about to be pinched by Li Lanying at this moment and rolled his eyes. Naturally, he couldn't answer Fatty Li's seemingly reasonable but extremely absurd question. In fact, his heart was about to collapse, because he was being pinched by a blind bear at this time. However, this blind man uttered Fatty Li's voice.

Could it be that Li Lanying became something else just like herself?This is too fucking absurd, Zhang Shifei thought, but now is not the time to think about these things. He has not been able to understand it for a long time, but now he really understands it deeply, it is simply too fierce.

So he had to instinctively open his mouth, cursing intermittently: "Let go... let go! It's me! Don't pinch!!!"

Fatty Li, who had turned into a black bear, actually spoke when he heard the 'fat chicken' in his hand. This fright made him tremble suddenly, and Zhang Shifei in the bear's paw uttered another pitiful scream.

This shock was not small, especially Li Lanying's fat man's head was still not working well. He let go of his hand with an 'ah' sound, and Zhang Shifei lay on the ground. Li Lanying's bear face was covered with Shouted in horror: "Old Zhang! Come here, look, this chicken can speak human!!"

Zhang Shifei was lying on the ground weakly after being pinched, and he almost lost his breath when he heard what Li Lanying said. He thought to himself, what's wrong with this fat man? Could it be that he was confused by the electric shock?So he cursed weakly: "Your uncle, this is me!"

Fatty Li was stunned, his bear eyes glowed green in the dark night, the eyes of those reform-through-labour prisoners who had been trapped in prison for seven or eight years after being released after serving their sentences were just like that when they saw the first woman.

Under the moonlight, Zhang Shifei looked at him weakly, but he didn't say a word in a daze, but a long stream of snot dripped down the old bear's face unknowingly.

After a while, Li Lanying put on her old bear face like a pumpkin and said tremblingly to Zhang Shifei, who was completely torn apart: "Old Zhang?"

Zhang Shifei nodded weakly.

"Snapped!!!"

A clear and powerful slap sounded, accompanied by Fatty Li's wretched howl: "It hurts me to death!! Is this not a dream?? How is this possible!!"

Obviously, judging by the thinking of a normal person, everything in front of him is impossible. Although Fatty Li is wretched, he can barely be regarded as a normal person, but the tragedy is that all of this is so real .

Zhang Shifei saw that Fatty Li's half-face was obviously swollen, so he sighed and gave a wry smile. Isn't that what happened to him just now? Damn it, what the hell did we do? Zhang Shifei thought of it.

Fatty Li is still collapsing, but Zhang Shifei is calmer than before. Although he still can't believe this is true, everything in front of him has to make him believe that he and Fatty have become beasts. Although he was afraid in his heart, he also understood that it was not an option to continue to be afraid like this, and it was not his (self-proclaimed) character to sit and wait for death, so he suppressed the trembling and fear, and said to Fatty Li who was still rubbing his head: " Stop convulsing, this doesn't seem to be a dream, help me up quickly, help me up!"

When Fatty Li heard what Zhang Shifei said, he came back to his senses and hurriedly helped him up. The two of them, or the two beasts, sat facing each other like this. They both had something to say in their hearts, but they didn't know how Say it.

Fatty Li shouted at Zhang Shifei in panic: "Old Zhang!! What's going on here? How did you become like this?? And where is this?"

"Quiet! Calm down, let me think about it first." Zhang Shifei fluttered his wings, and immediately dropped a few feathers. In fact, he also wanted to ask this question, but because the question was too complicated, he didn't know where to start. After thinking about it, Zhang Shifei racked his brains and summed up all the problems.

1: Didn't we get messed up by the wires? How did we come to this place?
2: Where exactly is this place, and what happened to us?

3: Why did we both become beasts?
With Zhang Shifei's mind, he could only think of these three questions, but fortunately they were all on point, so he began to think about the reason for all this again.

Question [-], how can we be okay after being electrocuted?

Answer: I don't know.

Question two, where is this place?

Answer: Not sure.

Question three, why did we both become beasts?
Where the hell am I going? ! !Zhang Shifei finally howled out, and he collapsed again, because he discovered tragically that there was no answer to this matter even if he wanted to break the sky. Now he is really desperate, looking at his disgusting body feathers and Li Lanying, who had turned into a black bear, were speechless.

Ever since, the two of them just stared at each other, unable to say a word.

The night is still going on, the moon in the sky is surprisingly bright, even the crater above it can be seen clearly, the night wind has calmed down, the scent of unknown flowers around is permeating the heart, time seems to be broken Like a faucet, tick-tock, silent and quiet, I don't know how long it took, the sky turned from black to blue silk gray at the bottom of the pot, and this sad night passed like this.

When the white belly of the East was exposed, Zhang Shifei and Li Lanying finally completely believed that all this was true. It seemed that they were indeed corona caused by the wires that were broken because they peed on the poles. Inexplicably, they turned into two beasts and appeared on the grassland of the Mahle Gobi, but why there was a big bird on the telegraph pole, and whether the wire was broken by that big bird is a question that Zhang right and wrong have always had I didn't figure it out, but then again, there is nothing he can figure out about this matter. The only thing he can figure out now is that he is hungry, probably because of being overly frightened. Looking at Li Lanying, the belly of this black bear is already buzzing.

Although the fear and panic in Zhang Shifei's heart are no less than Li Lanying's, he knows that no matter what, there are two people now, which is much better than when they were alone. After all, no matter what happens in the future, they can take care of each other, so , he proposed to walk around and find something to eat first.

Apparently, Li Lanying also had this idea in his heart. There was probably no other way to go here except to starve to death, so he forced himself to stand up full of fear and doubts, and dragged his heavy body to jump forward. The jumpy Zhang Shifei set foot on this unknown land, and the two of them don't know what this step means, perhaps, from the time they peed under the electric poles in the night streets of Harbin. From a moment on, the script of their fate has already started to operate. Yes, just like us in front of the book at this moment, we are always complaining about the jokes that fate has played on us, and when the two of them step into this strange land At that time, the joke of fate had just begun.

Zhang Shifei only noticed how strange the environment they were standing in now. It was early morning and the air was surprisingly fresh. Although he was not in the mood to take care of these trivial matters, he had to admit that this grassland was indeed beautiful and messy.

Green grass, it should be called so, Zhang Shifei thought, but the green grass here is not as emerald green as usual, on the contrary, it is a little lavender, with eyes like lavender, but there are no flowers, but it still exudes A smell similar to the fragrance of flowers smells in the nose, giving people a sense of tranquility and peace. Perhaps it is this fragrance that makes the little rascal Zhang Shifei regain his composure so quickly, but with his elm head It is impossible to detect.

The prairie is not endless. Zhang and Li have already vaguely seen a touch of emerald green appearing far away from them. It does not seem to be inconsistent with the lavender under their feet. It is obviously a large forest. It's a bit difficult to see, it seems to be shrouded in mist, but if you look at it with a vague outline, it's almost like a green hill.

The strangest thing is that there is no sun in the sky here!It's really strange, the east just now has turned white, and the surrounding area is getting brighter and brighter, but the sky is just a blue, only the most important thing is gone, Zhang Shifei looked up, then lowered his head and spit , Cursing secretly, what, can you exaggerate a little more.

Obviously, after going through such absurd and inconspicuous things as electric shock, teleportation, Fatty Li turning into black bear skin, and not knowing what he turned into, no one would believe it, Zhang Shifei Unexpectedly calm down, now even if he sees elder brother Baotang Seng passing by to learn Buddhist scriptures, he will probably remain calm.

People, after receiving too much stimulation at one time, it is easy to calm down, although Zhang Shifei and Li Lanying's hearts are full of cursing words at the same time.

Zhang Shifei thought: His uncle's, where is this?
Li Lanying thought: This is a dream, this is not real, right?Right?

Just like that, walking aimlessly on the purple prairie, the two tragically discovered that there was not even a grasshopper on this prairie except for them, and their belly was getting louder and louder. Thinking about it, yesterday I just drank at night, and the urine and cold sweat had already been excreted from the body. Zhang Shifei was fine, but Li Lanying, who kept clamoring that he was dreaming, couldn't take it anymore. His body was always honest, and he didn't leave. He sat on the ground with his buttocks, his fat buttocks overwhelmed a piece of grass, he opened his mouth and said to Zhang Shifei: "Old Zhang, stop jumping around, I'm starving to death, where can I get food?"

Zhang Shifei gave him a blank look, then turned his head and said, "Where the hell am I going to go? Look at your worthless appearance, get up quickly, or I will leave you and go by myself."

Who would have imagined that Fatty Li wouldn't take this kind of thing at all, and after hearing what Zhang Shifei said, he even sprinkled it on, and saw him lying on the ground with two big bear paws tumbling non-stop, and his mouth kept saying, "I'm going!" Stop moving, I'm starving to death!"

Zhang Shifei's head is full of black lines, it's no wonder, thinking about Li Lianying's previous body shape, you know that he was spoiled and raised since childhood, and his parents are wealthy, so where did he suffer this crime? Zhang Shifei understands these things in his heart, but why isn't he like this? Well, since childhood, he and Li Lanying have always been masters of laughing and laughing, but he knows in his heart that in this environment, no one will pity you, so you can only rely on yourself.

So he cursed at Fatty Li and said, "Don't be ashamed, look at how dead you are, what's so cute about his uncle, hurry up and get the hell out of me."

In fact, Zhang Shifei is quite embarrassing, if Li Lanying is a lolita, at least she might be cute in this sloppy state, but you say a dirty bear is rolling in front of you with snot and tears, No matter how you look at it, it looks like you have been poisoned, so there is no cuteness to speak of.

Li Lanying doesn't like him at all. You must know that although our Fatty Li is usually wretched and lecherous, he is also shameless enough. His potential character is just like his name, more or less feminine, and now he has been criticized one after another. The stimulation seemed to awaken this unknown side, and the difficulty became more serious. He just said nothing, and said to Zhang Shifei: "Starve me to death! Die me from thirst! I don't want to live anyway. Already!"

Zhang Shifei was speechless, and when he was about to curse, he suddenly heard something, so he hurriedly said to Li Lanying, "Stop howling! Listen!"

After listening to what Zhang Shifei said, Fatty Li stopped, and asked Zhang Shifei with a snot in his nose, "What are you listening to?"

Zhang Shifei did hear a sound, clattering, of course, it was not a fairy daughter peeing, but it was still like the sound of nature to Zhang Shifei's ears, because he knew it was the sound of water, it should be a small river, although this Some are illogical, because there was no sound at all just now, and now there is the sound of the river suddenly, as if the river appeared out of thin air.

However, how many things in this fucking grassland are in line with common sense? ?
Zhang Shifei no longer has the time in the United States to think about this painful problem. You must know that his throat is already thirsty and smoking, so he hurriedly said to Li Lanying: "Listen, the sound of water!"

As soon as Li Lanying heard what Zhang Shifei said, she stopped crying and listened carefully. Sure enough, the sound of splashing water came from the east.

I saw Li Lanying's small eyes flashing with the same light suddenly, the poisoned expression of dying or living just now was gone at all, he sat up straight, and then shouted that he couldn't die, he couldn't die, and passed the sound of the water Run in the direction you came.

His speed was so fast that Zhang Shifei was speechless looking at the bear whose head had been spattered with chicken blood, and followed him, scolding Li Lanying while running: "Your uncle's fat man, don't you say you have no strength at all!" Is it gone?"

Li Lanying's bear paws stepped on the grass and made a loud noise, and he was panting and scolding Zhang Shifei while running: "Fuck off, haven't you heard that people will explode magically when they face life and death?" Small universe?"

He is actually cheap, Zhang Shifei was speechless.

After running for about 5 minutes, a quiet small river appeared in the distance in front of me. From a distance, it looked as beautiful as a shiny white silk scarf, reflected on the lavender grassland, giving people a feeling It was a very quiet scene, but Zhang Shifei clearly remembered that the two of them had clearly been here just now, and there was nothing here at all. Could it be that this river appeared out of thin air?
The two who were already thirsty and crazy couldn't take care of so much anymore. Li Lanying took the lead to run to the river by relying on his relatively long legs. Looking at his 360-degree turn and eagerness to try, it was obvious that he wanted to plunge into the water, but He didn't do that, but stood by the river in a daze.

Seeing that something was wrong, Zhang Shifei ran up in a hurry. He came to Li Lanying's side, and saw that he was looking at the water surface and trembling. Without realizing it, Zhang Shifei followed his gaze and looked into the river, only to see the reflections of two people reflected in the mirror-like river water, a dirty grizzly bear and a dirty peacock .

Zhang Shifei was not particularly afraid. Compared to before, he had calmed down a lot. When he saw his own shadow, he was even a little relieved, because just now Li Lanying kept saying that he had turned into something like a chicken. Well, at least peacocks are better than chickens, but there is only one thing Zhang can't figure out, and that is his own reflection, no matter how you look at it, it looks like the one on the pole last night, F**K.

But Li Lanying was not as calm as he was. He opened his bear's mouth slightly and began to chant: "Bear...bear...bear...bear!!!!"

Zhang Shifei smiled wryly. It seems that Fatty Li has a big heart and has not noticed any abnormalities in his body. The successive blows have already broken him down, so that he has no other movements except thoughts.

Zhang Shifei kept looking at Fatty Li. He knew that this was not a fact that ordinary people could accept. After a while, he looked at Fatty Li and suddenly stopped talking, but his mouth was slightly open, full of sharp teeth, and the saliva flowed smoothly. It dripped from the corner of his mouth.

This made Zhang Shifei speechless and couldn't help but start to worry about the fat man's brain. Thinking of this, Zhang Shifei couldn't help but shudder, wouldn't the fat man be amused by the scare?
(Second update is complete, tickets are being requested...)
(End of this chapter)