Heart like dust, smile peacefully

Chapter 17 The years are quiet, Xu Yi is calm and stable (3)
Therefore, don't be impulsive when facing feelings, because a little thing will test his feelings for you by playing temper and engaging in cold war.Love is based on mutual trust. On the surface, anger is that you are venting your dissatisfaction with your boyfriend, but behind it lies your distrust of him and your uncertainty about this relationship.If things go on like this, it is difficult to guarantee that there will be no quarrels, misunderstandings, disagreements and suspicions between you, and even the best relationship may be "ruined" in your own hands.

Having been in love, after going through all kinds of twists and turns, the women finally mustered up the courage to enter into marriage and started an ordinary life of daily necessities.From a high-ranking "princess" in love to a busy "Cinderella" after marriage, women will inevitably have some psychological gaps, and women will soon find that the man they marry has many Some of the shortcomings are even hard for her to accept: when a man is in love, when he appears in front of her, he always looks clean and fresh, his shirt is always so white, and his leather shoes are always so bright, but after marriage, a woman will find that A man can not wash his feet for a week, throwing stinky socks everywhere; when in love, a man is always obedient to her, caring and considerate everywhere, and rarely speaks loudly, but after marriage, a man can instantly turn into a tiger and blow his beard. Staring is commonplace; when in love, as long as she calls, no matter what time or what the man is doing, he will appear in front of her as quickly as possible, but now it is commonplace to drink with friends until midnight, if a woman calls Urge him to go home, and he will simply turn off the phone.

After discovering this, the women began to feel depressed, so they had even more reason to be angry at this time: if a man doesn’t wash his feet, women will get angry; if a man talks to other women, women will get angry; Drinking alcohol will make women angry; men who educate their children too harshly will make women angry; men who do not honor their father-in-law and mother-in-law during Chinese New Year holidays will make women even more angry... Although married women are often angry, but the nature of their anger has changed. It is very different when they are in love. It is no longer to test men, but they are really dissatisfied with men. More importantly, they want to use this method to get rid of these problems in men and make them into their own hearts. The ideal husband image.However, the wish is beautiful, but the reality is cruel. Faced with the transformation of women, men will either remain indifferent and do whatever they want, or rise up to resist, and as a result, family wars break out immediately.

In fact, when faced with these problems of married men, women don’t need to get angry or get angry, because this will not solve the problem, but will stimulate conflicts and affect the relationship between husband and wife.Whether it is a problem of living habits or a problem of being in the world, if a woman feels that her husband is not doing well or is not doing well, she can communicate in another way, such as discussing, persuading, and communicating sincerely. Getting angry is more of a solution.

In addition to some life issues, the most annoying thing for a woman after marriage is the entanglement between her husband and other women.Perhaps, a woman can tolerate her husband not washing his feet for a week, or his husband going out to drink every now and then, or his hot temper, but the most unbearable thing for a woman is that her husband has relationships with other women, or even Saying more than a few words will not do.However, in real life, whether it is in the workplace, shopping malls, or some social activities, women have already held up half the sky, and men have to go out to work every day, so it is inevitable that they will come into contact with the opposite sex.If a woman is always angry because of this, I am afraid that she will live in unhappiness and unreliability every day.It is neither good for your own physical and mental health, nor good for the development of the relationship between husband and wife.Therefore, for this point, women must be more generous, as long as men do not touch the bottom line of some marriages, they should not be too fussy.Do not easily believe rumors that are speculative. Even if you sometimes see something with your own eyes, don’t be too impulsive. Maybe it’s just a misunderstanding. If you can’t control your emotions, it may cause serious consequences.

A rift arose between her and her husband due to a coincidental misunderstanding.

On Friday afternoon, she called her husband Yingdao once. She said she wanted to go shopping in the mall after get off work, and Yingdao agreed.The two have just been married for half a year, and they don't plan to have children yet, and want to live in the world of two again.After get off work, Yingdao came to the mall at the appointed time, but he didn't see her.Just as he was about to call, her call came.She said that the unit suddenly had something urgent to deal with, and she might be half an hour late, so she asked Yingdao to go shopping by herself or go to the coffee shop for a cup of coffee.

Yingdao came to the coffee shop and just ordered a cup of coffee. Before he had a few sips, his phone rang again. It was from his old classmate Xinmei.It turned out that Xinmei was drunk in a restaurant, crying and making a fuss there, the waiter in the restaurant found a number in her mobile phone that she frequently contacted recently and called.Recently, because of the fifth anniversary party of college classmates, the former monitor Xinmei and the former deputy monitor Yingdao often kept in touch, so the waiter was calling Yingdao's mobile phone, and the waiter hoped that Yingdao could rush over as soon as possible.The restaurant where Xinmei is staying is not far from Yingdao's current location, and it can be reached within a few minutes by car, so Yingdao rushed there without thinking too much.

It turned out that Xinmei had just lost her love, and she drank like this because she was too sad.Yingdao tried to comfort her to no avail, so he had to drag her into the car, trying to send Xinmei home.Just then the phone rang, and it was "her".

As soon as he answered, before he could speak, Xinmei snatched the phone from the side, and muttered loudly: "Don't answer other women's calls, no!" In the back seat, Yingdao hurriedly brought the phone over, just about to explain to her, but found that the phone turned off automatically when it was out of power.

He thought he had to explain to her afterwards and send Xinmei home first.Unexpectedly, when they arrived at the door of Xinmei's house, Xinmei threw up both of them.Yingdao quickly opened the door, helped Xinmei to the bathroom, told her to spit out, found a clean dress for her from the closet, and helped her to lie on the bed.Then I hurried to the bathroom to deal with myself with a towel.After wiping, he covered Xinmei with a quilt and was about to leave.As a result, "she" suddenly appeared at this moment, and Yingdao realized at this time that when Fu Xinmei entered the door just now, she forgot to close the door because of her haste.

It turned out that when she was talking to him, she heard a woman's voice, and then she couldn't get through.She vaguely heard that the voice resembled Yingdao's classmate Xinmei, so she hurried to Xinmei's house, but as soon as she entered the door, she found the scene of two people in disheveled clothes.

"Don't get me wrong..." Seeing her, Yingdao hurriedly explained, but before he finished speaking, she raised her hand and slapped her, then turned around and rushed out of the room.Yingdao hurriedly chased him out, wanting to continue explaining, but she didn't listen at all, the two of them got into a tussle in the stairwell, and Yingdao was slapped by her again during the arguing, "There is nothing to explain, I have seen it with my own eyes, you still don't know what to do. deny?"

He was slapped twice without doing anything, and he was not even given a chance to explain.Yingdao was also angry. He pushed her to the ground with a flick of his hand, turned and left angrily without any explanation.Although the misunderstanding between the two was resolved after Xinmei's explanation, the relationship could never go back to the past.

A woman is born as a flower. When she is young and beautiful, her face is like a delicate peach blossom. When she is strong and independent, she is like a plum blossom in full bloom. When she is pitiful, she is like a pear blossom with tears on her cheeks... But no matter what kind of flower you make, you can’t make love and get angry.” Popcorn", because popcorn will destroy a woman's beauty and destroy her charm.A woman who often gets angry and gets angry because of some trivial things will be scared away by her when she comes to happiness.Even if you really encounter a "big" thing like her in the story, don't get angry when you don't know the truth, otherwise it is likely to turn a misunderstanding into the beginning of mutual suspicion.

5. Give yourself peace of mind
You are living the life you want to live, but you just haven't found the fun in it.Your world is the whole world, there is no outside world at all.

Women are always timid, afraid of thunder, afraid of seeing mice, afraid of walking alone at night, of course, most of these fears are caused by physiological characteristics, which is normal.Moreover, this fear will also highlight the charm of women and give men an urge to protect.However, women's fear is not only manifested in the physical aspect, their greater worries and fears come from psychology.

When I was not married, I was afraid that I would not be able to get married. When I was married, I was afraid that my husband would have an affair; when I chose to have children, I was afraid that my career future would be affected; When you fail, you will be laughed at, follow the rules, be mediocre, and you are afraid of being eliminated from the workplace one day; you are beautiful, but you are afraid of the passage of time, and you will be old and ugly one day, and you are afraid of the eyes of the world... Anyway, you are worried every day , Fear of everything, serious lack of sense of security, I don't know when I will find peace of mind.

So, where do women get so much worry and fear?After several generations of hard work, women finally achieved equality between men and women, held up half the sky alone, and became women of the new era with independent personalities, independent lives, and independent careers.Although from the perspective of human liberation, this is a very meaningful thing, but at the same time it also means that the time when a woman can hide behind a man as a weak person is gone forever.Since you are "half the sky", you have to fight in the workplace like a man, and at the same time do a good job as a woman - husband and child.As the saying goes, if you grasp with both hands, you must be firm with both hands. If something goes wrong in one aspect, you will lose the capital to compete with others, and you will lose the sense of security to stabilize your future.This kind of worry and tension of women is not groundless, because in real life, women not only have to bear the exclusion of men, but also the attacks of other women.

Modern men are becoming more and more picky. If you are gentle, he will say that you have no personality; if you are beautiful, he will add a deadline to you;Anyway, the outside world is very exciting, with lush flowers and plants, they don't have to worry about leaving you and becoming lonely.

Moreover, a man can only focus on his career, as long as his career is successful, he can show his face with a little bit, and everything will happen.And if a woman devotes herself to her career, she will not be too successful no matter whether she succeeds or not.If the career is not successful, it will really lose youth and delay the family; if the career is successful and the position is high, most men will run away upon hearing the news, even if they are already under siege, it may be difficult to stop them from quitting.

(End of this chapter)