my mysterious boyfriend

Chapter 115 Don't Get Too Complacent

I used to think that his slightly commanding domineering made me very useful, but now I just think it is very ironic.

I tried my best to grin my mouth and pull out a seemingly innocuous smile, I chuckled and said: "Why, Yu Minghui, are you so unlucky? Are you so incomprehensible to read my messages? You were dumped by me , I don’t want you anymore, get out.”

I don't blame myself for speaking harshly to him at this moment.

Because I am afraid.

I must take the initiative, I must say these cruel words first, and I must not share all the cruel truths with him, to make sure that the man in front of me who has warmed me up for a while has never loved me, Lin Sisi, at all.

I know I'm pathetic.

Even at this moment, I still hope that all his kindness to me is not from redemption, but from true love.

As long as I survive this moment of self-deception, self-anesthesia and self-hypnosis, in the days that I need to crawl forward alone and suffer from loneliness, when I recall everything in Zhanjiang, when I recall this man named Yu Minghui, I still remember Don't think you have nothing.

And Yu Minghui, how could he be so cruel.

I thought he would coax me into giving Lin Sisi the illusion that Yu Minghui loves me with sincerity like he has coaxed me countless times before, but he didn't this time.

His eyes became more and more cold, he just looked at me coldly, he almost stopped every word, he once kissed me passionately, but then he kissed Cao Jiaying passionately again, his lips opened and closed, so indifferent, he said : "Lin Sisi, don't be too complacent, I have never loved you, not even for a second."

He spoke seriously, and his expression was serious, and I suddenly felt that even the barren night behind him seemed extremely serious.

Well well, he doesn't love me.

He really doesn't love me.

He loves Cao Jiaying, right?

Think about how Cao Jiaying scattered my schoolbag of pornography on the ground at the beginning, and he apologized to me on her behalf.Think about how many girls he has dumped for Cao Jiaying, think about the constant pity and concern for Cao Jiaying in his eyes that night when she was drunk, think about his lips sticking to her lips so intently, think about him The confusion and intoxication in the eyes, they should not only be friends but not lovers, they should become each other's true love, which can be regarded as eliminating harm for the people.It's just that he, Yu Minghui, feels that he owes me Lin Sisi, he owes me, he wants to compensate me and redeem me, he wants to be the savior guiding light of my Lin Sisi's down-and-out life, and he wants to use his whole life as a price to pay for my life. The pathetic poor woman is dragged out of the quagmire, and he will spend his life in atonement and delivery.

But, I didn't need his redemption and compensation, what I needed was his wholehearted love, just like Lin Sisi, an idiot like me, who fell in love wholeheartedly.

But it turns out that in the world of love, the most pitiful, saddest and most depressing thing is not that I love him but can’t be with him, but that I love him and he doesn’t love me and he gives me alms and pretends that he loves me very much , I used to devote myself to enjoyment without distraction. I thought I met the simplest hand in hand because of love in my life. Only when I woke up did I realize that it was just a dream.

It turns out that the truth that he doesn't love me makes me feel a thousand times or ten thousand times crueler than he once ruined me, and it makes me feel that it is simply unbearable and unforgivable.

My heart seemed to be raining heavily, but I gritted my teeth and forced myself not to shed any more weak tears in front of him.

Pretending as if nothing had happened, I waved the mobile phone in my hand at him, and I said: "Your broken mobile phone, return it to you."

After I finished speaking, I let go of the light-colored mobile phone that I once cherished so dearly. It fell straight down at a particularly fast speed. It quickly hit the floor hard and fell apart, just like the space between me and Yu Minghui. That's how it ended.

It was really appropriate, the car started to start just as the sound of the phone falling had subsided.

Yu Minghui's face first became blurred before my eyes, and then completely disappeared.

I thought I could keep holding back my tears, but in my patience, my tears kept rushing like a flood that burst a bank.

I didn't dare to cry out, so I covered my mouth with my hand.

In the end, I bit my palm tightly and let the pain continue to erode me, so I can control myself not to cry in such a public place.

At this moment, the man sitting in front of me suddenly handed me a pack of tissues.

I was stunned for a moment, desperately suppressing my sobs, I said intermittently: "No, thank you."

The kind man didn't insist anymore, he took the tissue back, and sat there quietly, all I could see was the dark back of his head.

I was afraid of affecting this kind-hearted person, so I had to clenched my fists and clenched my teeth, and never let myself utter any sobs.

Fortunately, the man got off at the Guandu Tollgate.After he got out of the car, his back was still facing me, and I couldn't see his face. He quickly got into a car that came to pick him up and left.

I don't know why, after he got off the car, there were more than 30 passengers in the car that was originally empty.

It’s also the first time for me to take a long-distance bus to Shenzhen in Zhanjiang. Although I feel that the Guandu toll station is not a station, it’s weird that more than 30 passengers come up at once, but I really don’t have the mood to pursue these at all. I shrank back into the corner by my shoulders, making way for the fat woman who came over and sat next to me.

In this way, on a cool night in early spring, I seemed to have been abandoned by the whole world, like a puppy that had lost its shelter, and more like a peach with a rotten wound, wandering in embarrassment, In the confusion of the night, I went to Shenzhen, which was extremely strange to me.

I think my teary eyes must be half of the determination to move forward from time to time, and the other half is the occasional hesitation of wishful thinking.

Every time I think of the awkward farewell with Yu Minghui, I think he didn’t give me the illusion that he loves me like before. Just like that, I closed my eyes.

I woke up being pushed and shoved by the bus driver.

When I opened my eyes, under the wanton pouring of the sun, I saw many cold but tall buildings under the solitude of people, and my ears were full of pure or laborious Mandarin.

The middle-aged male driver said to me in Cantonese with a unique Zhanjiang accent, "Ximei, get off the car. You are the only one in the car."

I found that I was hopeless.

It was such a familiar accent that dragged my whole soul back to Zhanjiang. I seemed to hear Yu Minghui calling my name with a strong Zhanjiang accent. He said, Lin Sisi, Lin Sisi, Lin Sisi four four.

His voice kept lingering in my mind, and I subconsciously wanted to escape, so I stood up in a panic like a lunatic, pushed the driver away, and hurried out of the car.

After dragging that old suitcase to the lobby of the station, I saw a sign that said "Luohu Overseas Chinese Society Passenger Station" hanging in the center of the ceiling of the lobby, and I suddenly came back to my senses. I have arrived in Shenzhen.

Without a mobile phone and not knowing the way, I had no idea how to get to the place my parents rented.

What's more, after I calmed down, I realized that it was no longer my home. I had to abide by the most basic principles of outsiders. Welcome me, or think of a reason in advance that doesn't hurt my heart.

I have to find a taxi shop that can make a phone call and call home.

However, it may be too early. I dragged my heavy suitcase for nearly half an hour, but I couldn't find a shop that I could call.

And the way the city of Shenzhen welcomes me is also a bit hard for me to accept.

It was a fine day just now, but for some reason, it started to rain heavily. I stood in front of an Internet cafe called "Tongtianxia" to take shelter from the rain, but the rain seemed to be hostile. The eaves of the house splashed fiercely towards me, so I had no choice but to bite the bullet and push open the door of the Internet cafe.

Thinking about the torrential rain, I couldn't go. I bit the bullet and paid ten yuan for a computer to surf the Internet. I also wanted to try my luck and see if Lin Shanshan would be online.

Who knows, just after logging in to QQ, I received a message from Chen Daowei.

According to the time of the message, it was sent at three o'clock in the morning.

He sent three messages all over his face.

Lin Sisi, I heard you left Zhanjiang?
Why is the phone turned off?
Call me anytime you need help, I'm on 24 hours a day.There is no other meaning or extravagant thinking, just treat you as a friend.

I stared at it for a while, my eyes were so astringent.

Finally, I tapped the keyboard with some stiff fingers to reply him, and I said, "It's okay, thank you."

After replying to Chen Daowei, I moved the mouse to look for Lin Shanshan's QQ, and my eyes stayed on Lin Xiaotong's QQ interface for a while. I thought about Cao Jiaying's words again, and I felt that I, Lin Sisi, had lived in vain these past few years. .

It was really a waste of suffering.

Let’s not talk about it first, how those people who made irresponsible remarks to me and regarded me as a scourge pointed at me and looked down on me, then why did I ever look down on myself?
When I resent others for thinking that I am unbearable, subconsciously I also feel that I am unbearable!

Thinking about it now, those scumbags who persecuted me are the ones who are truly unbearable, and the ones who really deserve to go to hell!
The hatred in my heart began to become lush again, I couldn't help but squeeze my fists, the anger in my heart became stronger again, I thought that as long as I survived this difficult transition period, I will work hard to become If I become stronger and stronger, I will definitely find an opportunity later, and send Lin Xiaotong and that shitty Xiao Xiaozhi and his gang, who mainly harmed me, all back to hell!
At this moment, a sound of message notification dragged me back, I glanced at it, only to find that it was Chen Daowei who replied to me.

I never thought before that a person like Chen Daowei could get up so early to go to QQ.

As soon as he came up, he said: "Lin Sisi, where are you? Send me an address, and I'll find you?"

(End of this chapter)