Men love such a woman: 12 lessons a happy woman must take

Chapter 28 There are details in the rough, the charm of a woman is usually in the details (2)
An employee just got the good news that the company's bid was successful and wanted to tell the company manager as soon as possible, but he didn't know that the manager was busy when he knocked on the manager's door.

"Oh, I'm sorry, manager, I'm really sorry to disturb you in your busy schedule..."

The manager may have the following ways of answering, and it will make people have three distinct feelings.

One is to say in a serious and low tone: "Don't come if you know I'm busy!" Undoubtedly, this is the image of a serious, calm, and powerful leader with supreme dignity and prestige.

The second is a sharp voice, shouting in a guttural voice: "Don't come if you know I'm busy!" This kind of hysterical shouting is likely to make employees curse such a moody and unreasonable boss in their hearts.

The third is to raise the end of the sentence with a gentle tone, saying: "If you know I'm busy, don't come here." Anyone will understand the easy-going conveyed by this kind of gentle joke, and an approachable boss is right in front of you.

Voice is the naked soul of women.A woman's docile and elegant voice can conquer many people and give people an approachable feeling. Such women are welcome.On the contrary, a woman who always likes to raise her voice very high and sharply makes others stay away.

Todd's wife has a bad temper.One day, because the family cat broke the bowl, his wife started cursing loudly.Her voice was so loud and penetrating that even the people in the entire residential building could hear it.With such a piercing sound, it feels like a sharp iron object has been scratched on the bottom of the pot,

Todd quickly moved the books and chairs to the balcony and began to read poetry aloud.His son asked his father with a reverent look on his face: "Dad, does this method work? According to my experience, her voice will only be higher than yours!"

"Yes. It won't work, I know that too, but at least people here won't suspect that I'm cutting her neck with a knife!"

First of all, the "first voice can win people" mentioned here does not mean that you use the voice of Todd's wife to "stimulate people's hearts". What I want to tell you is: with a beautiful and melodious voice, you can become a likable people.

moderate volume
Although "big voice" is easy to spread, it is difficult to accept. Isn't this forcing others to distance themselves from you? The sound of "mosquitoes" is too difficult to listen to, and gradually others will lose patience, and it is difficult to achieve the purpose of communicating with people, so what about building interpersonal relationships?

The speed of the sound is appropriate
As the saying goes, "haste makes waste", if you are eager to express, the listener will not be able to digest your words immediately, not only listening to you will be tired but may not understand what you are expressing.A person who speaks slowly tends to make people anxious, and eventually he will let his own thoughts run wild, even if you speak well, it will lose its meaning.

Tone needs to vary

Just one example: "Yesterday we saw the Great Falls and heard the deafening sound. We jumped and screamed for joy! It was a beautiful sight!" Try saying this sentence with the same intonation, then switch to "There is The tone of expression" Read this sentence and you will understand how important this is.

Articulate and pronounce accurately

When dealing with people, speaking clearly is very important.When someone asks you to buy an onion, you hold it back for a clock; when someone asks you to buy a cup, you give a quilt... This is why our language needs standards and norms.

Although genetic factors determine a person's voice, you can still make it beautiful through acquired efforts.Female friends should pay attention to training in daily life.

training expression
To train the way of expression, you can find a short prose or catchy poem and read it in various dramatic accents; excitedly, listlessly, sadly, comically, irrepressibly, so that you can Master the charm of sound more effectively.

raise the volume of speaking

Sit up (or stand up) straight by letting your voice, which is too soft, be concise and powerful.Raise your head, speak loudly facing the furthest part of the room, and pay attention to the body language in the mirror; if you want to lower your voice, you should relax first, think of some familiar music melodies, and practice using soft words—that is, talking In the middle, deliberately speaking a certain sentence very lightly, this can also attract the attention of the listener.

constantly changing pitches
Generally speaking, people's various sensory organs like change and hate the same.Ears get uncomfortable hearing the same, flat tone.A person who pays attention to the art of conversation, the tone of voice is always changing according to the content of the speech, so that he can express his emotions appropriately.

pay attention to tone
Being good at controlling the tone of speech can not only accurately convey your attitude to the other party, but also make the language more appealing and make the other party have endless aftertaste.Your boyfriend is going to work far away, how should you answer when discussing with you? "No", "I disagree", "You can't leave me", "Can't you leave?" The basic meaning of the four answers is the same - I don't want my boyfriend to go away.But in comparison, using "Can't I leave?" is more contagious. It not only reveals one's own point of view, but also reveals one's tenderness. The other party will definitely have a special feeling after listening to it.

At the beginning of the meeting, praise is decent to win the favor of others
Everyone likes to hear compliments, especially women.If someone compliments her on her good figure and cute looks, she will be happy for a long time.But complimenting people is also learned. A woman who knows etiquette knows how to say compliments appropriately and naturally.

In fact, no one will feel unhappy, or feel disgusted or hostile to each other because of being praised by others.The ardent needs of human, an emotional animal, is to be able to get "identification", "acceptance" and "positive evaluation" from others.

However, if there is no compliment that hits the target, not to mention that it will not gain the favor of the other party, it will also arouse the displeasure of the other party, and may even ignite the hostile consciousness of the other party.

If you say to a rich woman, "I look healthy, that's fine." The other person may think, "You're just trying to call me fat. It's annoying to poke at the parts I care about the most."

Originally, I just wanted to praise women with dark skin: "Wheat-colored skin is great." Maybe it will provoke the other party's resentment instead: "Why, I am a dark-skinned woman, am I hindering you?"

So, what should we praise each other for?How to make your praise decent?Or how should you win over someone you meet for the first time through compliments?
When the other person wants you to compliment.outright praise

One of the points of praise is that what the other party thinks is proud or important is what you should pay attention to praise the other party.That is to say, if you want to praise, praise the other party for what you want others to praise from the bottom of your heart.

For example, if you don't care about fashion and always wear the clothes your wife chooses for you, if you compliment such a man: "Section Chief, your dress is very tasteful." His reaction may be a little shy Said: "That's not the case." However, this had no effect on him at all.

On the contrary, for a beauty lover who pays more attention to fashion than ordinary people, he should be praised like this: "Your dress is always different from others. I know that you dress up even in inconspicuous places. This kind of difference Isn’t the loose feeling of large symmetry the most popular now?” In this way, the other party will think: “Oh, so you have noticed it too!” Because the place that you are proud of has been noticed, you will praise yourself People look at it differently.

Those who have no strengths, praise his inner self.can impress him
If you want to please someone, no matter who it is, you can compliment him on the inside.

For example, for an ordinary cheerful person who has no strengths, you can praise him like this: "You are very cheerful, it's nice, and I am cheerful when I am with you." "You are very emotional." "You are very cheerful." Will take care of others." "You are very careful." "You are not only polite, but also very hearty." There should be many things that can be praised.

Even if the place of praise is not so right to his heart, because the inner thing is very abstract, the person being praised will not have a bad feeling.

Praise the strengths of the other party that he didn't even realize, and move his heart
Find out the strengths that even the other person has not noticed, and praise it, the other person will be happy and have a good impression of you.

In addition, many people always think of their personality traits as shortcomings.For example, people who are obsessed with others (in terms of good direction, they like others), in terms of interpersonal relationships, sometimes they are considered "long-winded" and disgusting.If someone says "you are such a long-winded person", not only will you be hit, but you will also think that "long-winded" is your shortcoming.

But, in reality, that's not necessarily a disadvantage. "Whispering" is sometimes an advantage.Long-winded people are very resilient in doing things and will not give up easily.Therefore, the shortcomings that people think may also be strengths or advantages.

This is a good material to win over people.Just let him know that what he thinks is a weakness is actually a strength.

Like anyone, admitting your own shortcomings can be painful.Therefore, when one's shortcomings are said to be advantages by others, the joy is very special.As a result, the other person will thank you for it and open up to you.

People who are afraid of being born and unwilling to make friends, tell him that "fear of being born is a proof of modesty".For those who are deep and easily annoyed, you might as well tell him that "although a thoughtful person may seem taciturn, they are also people who want to rely on them."

Win over each other with a smile

Whether you are meeting someone for the first time, someone you have met a few times, or an acquaintance, you can smile with satisfaction the moment you meet.A smile like this hides the message "It was a pleasure to meet you."

Smiles can win over each other, because people who are treated with smiles will have the idea and illusion of "this person has a good impression of me".However, don't confuse "smile" with "laugh". Recently, there are more and more people who don't smile properly but just giggle.

A smile is not the same as a smirk.Such as "Your company's business is booming, it's great. Ha, ha, ha!" Such a meaningless smirk will only make the other party unhappy, and even provoke the other party's counterattack: "There is nothing funny to laugh like that!" Sub-virtue."

A beautiful smile is sometimes better than a hundred compliments.Smile when you see people, this is the weapon to win people over.It is also good for women to practice smiling in the mirror every day.

Show character through compliments
It is only after the praise that everyone's reaction is quite different even if they use the same language to praise.Some people will obviously show a happy expression, some people will be overjoyed, some people will be shy; some people will sneer or have a suspicious expression; The head indicates that it knows, but otherwise there is no reaction, and no answer.

From these reactions, you can know whether the other party accepts your compliment, and you can also imagine whether the other party likes such compliments.Therefore, through such compliments, the other party will open his mind to you more, or on the contrary create new obstacles, so you can see the other party's personality traits more clearly.

That said, compliments are also a great way to get to know each other.With compliments, you can take control of your relationship with the other person.

People who are accustomed to being praised will not feel much about understated praise.For example, a beautiful girl who has been praised all the way because of her beauty since she was a child has taken it for granted that her beauty is praised.

Compliment this type of woman in a very generic "you're beautiful" way, and she'll dismiss it as "I already knew that".

In this case, if you want to praise her beauty, if you don't prepare a unique compliment first, there is no way to impress her.

For example, it can be said in a more dramatic way: "I never thought I could see someone as beautiful as you in person." Or in a way that even the person who said it would feel embarrassed: "Your beauty makes me limbs. Weak, I feel like I'm starting to faint."

Women who are confident about their beauty are used to being praised, but there should not be many such exaggerated compliments, so she will definitely care about you and remember you firmly.

Like anyone, admitting your own shortcomings can be painful.So, the joy when your shortcomings are said to be advantages by others.is very special.As a result, the other person will thank you for it and open up to you.

Reject bad posture and be a self-cultivated woman

Is there anything more important to a woman than beauty?Yes, that is the moving demeanor and manners!Your posture is always present in your gestures. An elegant posture is the perfect expression of a well-educated and confident person.There is a woman who is ordinary in appearance, but because she has a beautiful figure, she is very outstanding and more attractive.

If a person only knows how to make up and dress up, but does not know how to make himself decent and elegant.It is inevitable to end up in a superficial and annoying end.Even if a woman has an angel-like appearance and a devil-like figure, if her body is indecent and her behavior is vulgar, her beauty will be greatly reduced, giving people an impression of being uneducated.

Li Shan and Anna are very good friends. They usually eat together and attend classes together, and they are almost inseparable.But the two of them have completely different personalities. Li Shan is cheerful, carefree and informal, while Anna is more quiet and ladylike.Many people don't understand that two people with completely opposite personalities can become good friends.

One day, the weather was very hot, and everyone was listening to the class carefully.Suddenly there was a commotion somewhere in the classroom, and many people covered their noses.It turned out that Li Shan had taken off her sneakers.This indecent act drew criticism from everyone, and they couldn't help casting disgusted looks at her, but she didn't realize it.Anna, who was sitting next to her, touched her and motioned her to put her shoes on.This small reminder made her flushed and embarrassed.

Indeed, in daily life, we often see with regret that some women with fashionable makeup will do some actions such as blowing their noses, rubbing dirt, and getting their feet out of their shoes to "enjoy the cool" in full view of the public, which makes their image great. Discounted, this is the embodiment of lack of self-cultivation.

(End of this chapter)