Honkai Impact 3rd, a simulator of lifelong regret!

Rats in the gutter have no right to touch the sun.

The tiny moth will only be burned to ashes by the flames.

At this moment, Alicia's thoughts had reached, in a sense, the same level as those of the girl who had once been so deeply affected by her inferiority complex and self-loathing that she had even committed suicide in a certain sense.

The differences between people are indeed enormous. Anyone can have countless thoughts in a single moment. It is the countless thoughts that make up a single moment, and it is countless moments that make up a person in the true sense of the word.

……

89. Alicia: I must defeat the Honkai!

Looking at the boy who was still the same as when they first met, looking at the boy who was still the same as when he saved her, looking at the boy who believed her foolish words without hesitation, who believed her deception without hesitation.

This denial of memory is fundamentally a denial of everything in his heart up to now, a denial of all the thoughts in his mind right now.

The only way for a boy who has lost his emotions to maintain his sense of self is to believe in his past self and imitate his past behavior.

This foolish idea of ​​mine was merely a cover for my own flawed thinking.

It fundamentally negates all of Jiang Cheng's current inner self.

juvenile……

I still chose to believe.

I still chose to agree.

Her bright red lower lip was bitten even harder, to the point that even the Herrscher of Origin's physical strength caused some pitiful traces of blood to appear.

Since I've already lost so much emotion, since I can no longer be as gentle as before, since I've even lost much of my ability to love, then give me the brutality that matches this lost emotion.

This is exactly what the girl craves and hopes for.

—It's meaningless.

—Arrogant and conceited.

There was nothing I craved that could improve my mood or atone for the pain of my sins, only the gentle caress from above my head.

"Then of course I can only continue to forgive. People always make mistakes, and no one is an exception. If even I, as your lover, cannot forgive you, then what is the meaning of this relationship?"

“I don’t know how many times I’ve said it, but I’m so used to it from the bottom of my heart. You must have begged me like this many times.”

"You're too cruel, making me the executioner for so long. But if it were you, I would of course choose to forgive you."

The smile on the boy's lips was an arc he had long wanted to bring. After accepting the regret conveyed by the illusion from the deepest part of his heart, he also inherited the torment of this one-sided, unequal emotion.

Since they are lovers who are going towards each other, isn't it normal to be tolerant of each other and forgive each other's mistakes?

Every time I make even the smallest mistake, I seek punishment for myself, even for mistakes that I feel are not even worth mentioning.

At least in her heart, she felt no anger whatsoever at that mistake, nor did she feel the slightest dissatisfaction with Alicia.

The only minor complaint was that she couldn't accept Alicia's behavior, and she remembered that she had honed her skills to the point of being extremely proficient in the full-body ○-sit.

Doing this every time makes it seem like I'm some kind of bad man who likes to abuse his partner.

In this day and age, this small sense of resentment and discontent remains.

Jiang Cheng can finally speak his mind.

Finally, he could look into those gray... those pink eyes and express all the resentment he had accumulated over the years regarding the girl's excessive inferiority complex.

No need to worry at all.

There's absolutely nothing to be afraid of.

No matter what mistakes you make, you don't have to worry about getting angry.

It's simply a matter of the two of them cleaning up the aftermath together.

Even if the whole world is angry because of the girl's mistakes, the boy will definitely be the only one who won't blame her.

There was no earth-shattering event, no dramatic or convoluted cause like in a novel; it was simply because…

"We've been childhood sweethearts for over a decade, and even the Honkai could only fabricate lies to deceive me."

"I forgive you..."

"Isn't this a normal thing?"

……

tolerate.

This can now be considered an extremely luxurious thing.

In contrast, kindness has been completely stigmatized; even the slightest bit of compassion or pity is condemned.

Having witnessed too many terrible times, people have gradually withdrawn their kindness and begun to isolate themselves. They fear that anything they do could harm others, and even if they help, they might be betrayed, let alone receive gratitude.

All of this does not mean that the word "tolerance" has any issues of recognition; it only means that some fools choose to be shameless and disregard dignity in order to make a profit.

People fear inclusion, fear being a kind person, and this fear stems solely from a zero-sum game.

After the first ingrate was born, no one dared to believe that a complete stranger wouldn't be that ingrate, wouldn't imitate that ingrate's actions, and wouldn't choose to obtain that simple yet lucrative benefit.

It is precisely because people have witnessed too many such things that they believe, in stark contrast, that kindness is wrong and only coldness is right.

After initially believing in one aspect, one may fall into believing in another. Sometimes, just a few extremely foolish statements full of social Darwinism can garner the agreement of countless people.

So much so that it even ignores the fact that some people feel deceived by this world that is only fifty-year-old, and that it is not as good as those good people say.

When they think those good people are deceiving them, they completely forget that it is these good people who risked their lives and did their best to raise everything to fifty, making a world where the bottom line was originally zero or even negative a better place.

If there were only those who admired Social Darwinism, then the world could not possibly have fifty people, or even ten.

In a world that can't even be called a pyramid, where everyone has to do their best to live according to other people's extremely strict rules.

It will absolutely make those who think they've been deceived, those self-proclaimed social Darwinists, cry and beg for the good people to come back.

Ultimately, no matter how scared or terrified someone is, it's impossible for them to run away from every single moment of every day.

This fear only comes from outsiders, from strangers. It doesn't come from close family members, truly close family members.

Is there really any need to be so indifferent?

……

He was no longer able to utter a single word.

It could no longer make a sound.

Even if a fully enlightened monk were to sit in meditation, he would absolutely be unable to express his inner emotions; no matter how complex or intricate the description, it would be impossible to explain all of this.

At this moment, only one sentence was on the girl's mind.

Please...

—Kill me.

……

Alicia once thought that if she were to do something wrong or dirty, the hardest thing to overcome would be her own psychological defenses.

She lived in a simple and beautiful town from the very beginning, was saved by a gentle boy, and grew up in healthy, normal, and selfless love.

The gifts received were a fairytale of seeking paradise, and what was seen were blooming flowers. In the church, there were orphans who struggled to face life every day, nuns who devoted all their time and energy to caring for others, and parents who were willing to give their all to care for the children they had taken in.

The moral compass of people who live in the world with the well wishes of others fundamentally negates the act of doing wrong.

If I hadn't been so foolish as to not be able to imagine why I made that choice back then, my life would probably have been quite normal: I would have been with Jiang Cheng, fallen in love, and eventually walked down the aisle.

Regardless of whether or not one leaves offspring, and regardless of whether one's life afterward can be called happy amidst the chaos, this is an absolutely healthy life.

A life that very few people in the entire world are entitled to.

It has nothing to do with status or wealth.

It is rare to be blessed from the moment you are born into this world and to grow up in this world with a gentle heart.

The girl grew up with a bias, and arrogantly believed that she was flawless and pure. She thought that the hardest hurdle to overcome when she wanted to do bad things was her own mind. She couldn't accept her own mistakes, and she couldn't accept that she had become dirty and morbid.

This foolish and arrogant idea has only now been shattered.

The challenge I faced wasn't a difficult trap at all.

Alicia is essentially just a Herrscher who brings calamity.

The truly insurmountable...

—This is clearly a deception of Jiangcheng itself!

To deceive someone who is willing to believe unconditionally, to deceive someone who, even with a self-denying self, is still willing to place all their trust in an evil person.

To deceive someone who, even if ignored and abandoned, and never noticed before death, would still leave themselves weapons to survive in this cruel world and hope to find a better paradise.

What kind of utterly despicable scum, trash, waste, bastard, villain, or demon would do something so disgusting that even garbage wouldn't want it?

……

what……

They've already deceived us.

It's already a success.

Jiang Cheng believed my lies without hesitation, and was even willing to forgive my mistakes later, as a lover, simply because lovers should be honest with each other.

Why should someone as filthy, incompetent, and disgusting as me live in this world?

Is it just to hurt someone as wonderful as Jiang Cheng?

Honkai is indeed the greatest evil disaster that humanity has ever faced.

All beauty will be destroyed by it, all happiness will be extinguished by it, and all human kindness will fade in this cruelty.

The person who caused the destruction and calamity will shamelessly continue to greedily stay by the side of the hero they themselves destroyed and deceived.

Like a buzzing mosquito, he flew about, a despicable piece of trash who stole the fruits of others' victories, trampling on the real Icarus.

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