Crazy Nezha

Li Tianbao dialed the hospital's number again.

"Sorry! The number you dialed is currently switched off. Please try again later."

"Sorry! The number you dialed is powered off. Please try again later."

Li Tianbao frowned, inwardly complaining. At first, no one answered, and now the phone was switched off. What were these two doing?

"Is the power out?" Li Tianbao asked, puzzled.

He then dialed the number of his good friend Yang Zijie.

"Hey, Junbao, I need your help, it's like this..."

"At the foot of the old reservoir, could you please drive and pick up my dog, the husky, and a black goat..."

"Yes, yes, that's the place where you picked up the sheep transport cart. Okay, I'm at the hospital, um, the mental hospital... Xincheng Sixth Hospital."

"What? You want to come to the hospital for a follow-up check-up for the sequelae of meningitis? Sure, I'll make an appointment with Dr. Wang for you, he's a very nice guy..."

"Alright... good bro, see you at the hospital tomorrow, I'll treat you to pizza when you get there."

Beep, Li Tianbao hung up the phone and became puzzled. He knew about Yang Zijie's meningitis. Although Junbao was a bit of a goofball on the set, he shouldn't have come to the mental hospital for a check-up. Could it be that other hospitals couldn't treat him?

"Nephew, want some pizza?" Uncle came back, carrying a big box of pizzas.

"Where did it come from?"

"Sent by Chen Rui."

Li Tianbao went to the window and saw a girl with a high ponytail riding away on a motorcycle.

"Why doesn't she come up and sit for a while?"

Second Uncle: "They're waiting to go to their work shift."

Li Tianbao pulled up a small table. "Set it up."

My second uncle placed the pizza on the table, opened the box, and revealed a large pizza with a line of text written in tomato sauce:

"Big star, hang in there! We're waiting for you to recover! Smiley face (^^)"

Below the words, there are two cartoon dolls holding hands; you can tell they are a boy and a girl.

My second uncle said, "Look how chubby and cute this little figure is! Doesn't it look like a ginseng fruit?"

Li Tianbao looked down and said, "When I achieve great success in my cultivation, I will definitely take Chen Ruifei with me!"

Second Uncle: "The future? When is the future? Why not now? Nephew, cherish the present, don't follow my example."

Li Tianbao: "I don't know how to fly a plane right now!"

Second Uncle: "You know how to masturbate!"

Yin Jianshe reached for a piece of pizza, but Li Tianbao grabbed his wrist, asking in confusion, "What's wrong? You're not letting your second uncle eat any?!"

Li Tianbao: "Go and call Baoqiang here."

Second Uncle looked displeased: "Why call him? The two of us can eat together."

"Hurry up and go, or none of you will eat."

The second uncle reluctantly went to the large playground outside to find Sun Baoqiang.

"Sun Baoqiang, your brother Tianbao is calling you."

The skinny man holding a broom on the playground turned around and smiled brightly.

"They're here!"

The three of them were sharing a pizza in the hospital room.

Sun Baoqiang suddenly said, "Today is my birthday."

Upon hearing this, Li Tianbao burst into laughter and smeared tomato sauce on his second uncle's face.

Yin Jianshe stood up abruptly: "It's his birthday, what's the point of smearing me?"

"Second Uncle, today is your birthday too! You and Baoqiang were born on the same day, month, and year?"

Yin Jianshe was puzzled. "Today is my birthday? I don't remember..." He took out his phone and looked at it. Holy crap, it really is my birthday!

"Really? Nephew, you still remember your second uncle's birthday?"

Li Tianbao took out a bottle of Jigongshan Daqu, a 53-degree baijiu, from under the covers.

"Second Uncle, I still remember, we were originally planning to sneak over the wall to get pizza. Let's drink to our hearts' content today!"

Yin Jianshe's eyes were filled with emotion. "My birthday was a day of suffering for my mother. I miss my mother. It's a pity I'll never see her again. When I was young, I was ignorant and always made her angry."

Li Tianbao: "I miss my grandma too."

Li Tianbao opened the bottle of liquor, took out three disposable plastic cups from the bedside table, and filled them to the brim.

The three of them toasted.

For some reason, Yin Jianshe burst into tears after drinking. "I miss my mom so much. Your grandma is the only one in the world who's ever been truly good to me."

When Sun Baoqiang saw that the uncle was crying, he felt that he should do something to lighten the mood. What a nice day, why is he crying?

The three of them knew perfectly well that none of them were mentally ill; they were just pretending to be mentally ill out of necessity.

Sun Baoqiang fell into deep thought: Tianbao's second uncle was crying his eyes out. If the doctor saw him, wouldn't he be misdiagnosed as having a serious illness? What if the doctor really prescribed medicine? Should he take it or not? It was a difficult question!

If you don't eat it, the doctor will think you're sick! If you do eat it, then you're admitting you're sick.

No! I can't let his second uncle cry. Sun Baoqiang smeared some ketchup on his face, stood on the table, hooked his hand over his eyebrow, and struck a pose reminiscent of Sun Wukong.

"Uncle Yin, don't cry. Shall I dance a monkey dance for you to cheer you up?"

My second uncle really stopped crying. "You play the role of a tadpole looking for its mother, and I'll be your mother. Then you come find me."

Sun Baoqiang was stunned. Wait, isn't this insane?! "I can't act. Besides, Uncle Yin, this is very awkward. You're a man, how can I call you 'Mom'?"

"I can become a woman too!"

"Uncle Yin, stop joking. You've had too much to drink. If you could turn into a woman, I'd act as a tadpole and call you 'Mom.'"

"Good! Kid, remember what you said!" Yin Jianshe went to his bedside, lifted the blanket to look for something.

Li Tianbao quietly tugged at Sun Baoqiang's sleeve, gave him a wink, and whispered, "My second uncle is pitiful. He's drunk. It seems he really misses my grandma. Baoqiang, why don't you play along with him? You play the tadpole son, he plays the frog mother, and I'll play the eel."

Sun Baoqiang hesitated. "But if the doctor sees us like this, won't they classify us as seriously ill? Brother Tianbao, we're just faking mental illness, we're not really mentally ill."

Li Tianbao sighed, "Of course I know we're faking it! Even my second uncle is pretending; he's doing it to avoid debt collectors! Sun Baoqiang, remember this: whether I'm mentally ill or not, I know perfectly well! Why bother caring about the doctor's opinion!"

Sun Baoqiang's eyes lit up: "Yes, I'm a normal person, I know that perfectly well, why should I let the doctor define me! It's like a cow is always a cow, no matter what others say, it's still a cow, it can't become a sheep!"

Li Tianbao: "You have a great understanding!"

At this moment, Yin Jianshe, wearing a wig and a human skin mask, came over. She was dressed in a dress and stood tall and graceful. "My name is Tingting, and I am your mother. Sun Baoqiang, keep your promise."

Sun Baoqiang was horrified and exclaimed in shock, "Brother Tianbao, does your second uncle really have a mental illness?"

Li Tianbao raised an eyebrow. "He's faking it. You actually believe that?"

Sun Baoqiang: "That's true." He paused, then added, "Mom!"

"Okay, now I'll be the frog, and you come find me." Yin Jianshe hid behind the bed and croaked.

Sun Baoqiang started singing: "Little tadpole, looking for its mother, found an eel as its mother."

Li Tianbao twisted his body into an S-shape and sang, "I'm not your mother, your mother is a frog."

"Mom! Mom! Where are you? Mom, Mom, why don't you want me anymore..." Sun Baoqiang cried, tears streaming down his face.

……

Not far away, Dean Yang Yongshi stood outside, holding a teacup, his expression complex as he looked at the "Three Demons Dancing Wildly" through the ward window.

"Is this what Wang Yutian meant by 'not a big problem'?"

A vice president standing nearby said, "President, we can't blame Dr. Wang for this. The problem wasn't serious before."

Yang Yongshi sighed, "Large-scale performance art has already emerged, and Yutian still says there's no major problem?"

Vice President: "How about we send it to the West District for treatment? If things continue like this, it's no longer just a matter of increasing the dosage."

Yang Yongshi sighed, "One is Director Yin's son, and the other is Director Yin's second brother. Electrotherapy is not suitable for them."

"That Sun Baoqiang can be electrified."

Yang Yongshi tilted his head, a sense of disappointment about missing his chance to unleash a powerful attack. "Sun Baoqiang withstood three rounds of faith-based electroconvulsive therapy before. He's immune to lightning!"

The vice president shrugged. "There's no solution. If we can't cure it, wouldn't that damage the reputation of our Sixth Hospital?"

"I'll call Dr. Wang over, and the three of us can discuss this."

Yang Yongshi said, "Yutian went on a business trip to see Jiang Baiyue."

At that moment, a doctor rushed over in a panic.

"Dean, the 'Fire Cloud Evil God' in the West District has had another attack! Please grant me authorization for electroconvulsive therapy, I've already tried to electrocute him." At this moment, a doctor rushed over.

"Fire Cloud Evil God" is the nickname given to him by Dean Yang Yongshi. When this patient was brought in by his family, he claimed to be the reincarnation of Taiyi Zhenren and was very ill!

He was eventually diagnosed with schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and paranoia, and had severe violent tendencies. He has been in the hospital for 24 years!

Now he looks like a disheveled old man.

"What happened to Fire Cloud Evil God again?"

"He said he sensed that Nezha had awakened, and he demanded to be discharged from the hospital immediately to find his beloved disciple! He was making a huge fuss and couldn't be calmed down."

"Increase the dosage!"

"We increased the intensity last week, and he kept yelling that he wanted to go out and find Nezha! It seems like his schizophrenia is getting worse."

Yang Yongshi pushed up his glasses, the lenses reflecting a cold light that obscured his eyes. "I'll personally call him!"

"Let's go for a walk."

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