Genshin Impact: Watch me turn the tables and kill my servants at the start!

Phanes was awakened by pain.

To be precise, I was woken up by someone pinching my cheeks and the soft flesh on my stomach.

The pressure was neither too light nor too heavy, carrying an exploratory spirit of "I'm curious how this thing feels to squeeze," pinching from his left cheek all the way to his right, and then pinching back along the pitiful soft flesh under his ribs.

I opened my eyes groggily, and my vision was initially filled with a blurry warm color, which gradually focused on the face of a girl with short, light pink rose hair.

Clementine had her head down, one hand on his face, two fingers pinching his cheek, her light emerald green eyes filled with curiosity.

"Huh, he's awake." Clementine blinked.

It took Fanes about three seconds to realize he was lying on Clementine's lap. His head was resting on the girl's soft thigh, his whole body curled up in her arms like a kitten brought back by its mother cat. Clementine's pink hair brushed against his face, tickling him.

Fanes' first thought was: Oh no, has he been kidnapped by the House of Hearths and taken to some secret base for human experimentation?

My second reaction was: Wait, Clementine's legs are actually quite flexible.

Then Fanes suddenly sat up, his head almost hitting Clementine's chin.

Looking around, he found that the place was quite different from what he had imagined—it was neither the operating table of a secret base nor some dark and damp dungeon.

This was a prison cell with neatly welded iron bars and a cold, stone-paved floor. Two cots sat in the corner. The only light came from a small ventilation window high in the wall, through which heavy snow was falling. Judging from the density of the falling snowflakes, the temperature here was definitely below minus twenty degrees Celsius.

Two guards dressed in Fools’ uniforms stood outside the cell, their backs to them, like two statues.

Faenes looked down at himself—his clothes were still there, but the primordial sea bottle in his arms was gone, the 30,000 Mora in his pocket was gone, and even his shoes were gone. He stood barefoot on the stone slabs, the soles of his feet tingling with cold.

Seeing that he was awake, Clementine withdrew her hand from pinching his cheek and smiled gently at him: "Not long after you fainted, the Fools arrived. They captured Pepe, me... and you, and took us to Winter."

Fanes followed her gaze to another corner of the cell.

Peruvéli sat on a cot in the corner, her white, stray hairs obscuring most of her face. Her arms were draped over her knees, and she was curled up in a small ball. Her clothes were stained with blood, dried into dark brown patches, but her wounds seemed to have been treated simply, wrapped in rough bandages.

He sat motionless, his eyes seemingly fixed on nothing in particular, radiating an aura of "don't talk to me."

Fanes opened his mouth, intending to ask, "Big sister, you killed the executor, how many days do the three of us have left to live?" But after looking at Peruvieri's gloomy face, which seemed to drip ink, he swallowed his words back.

Forget it, it's better not to ask. Asking will only make things worse.

Fanes was eager to ask Clementine what was going on, but before he could speak, a series of orderly footsteps sounded outside the cell. Two guards turned and saluted, and then a tall figure appeared outside the iron bars.

The man was dressed in an elaborate black suit, and wore a clown mask that partially covered his face, the exposed half of which was expressionless. In his hand, he held a piece of parchment with gold trim and an ice-blue stamp on it.

The foolish leader is a clown.

The moment Faenes recognized him, his first thought was: This guy has come to interrogate the three of them in person? Does that mean he could write a book called "My Days in the Fools' Prison"? No... it seems he's here to pardon Peruvéli.

The clown stood outside the cell, glancing at the three of them through the bars. His gaze lingered on Peruvier for a while before settling on Clementine, and finally on Fanes, who was barefoot and squatting beside Clementine's legs, his hair still covered in dried scabs.

Without saying anything, he simply unfolded the parchment.

"Decree from Her Majesty the Ice Queen."

The clown's voice was deep and steady, reading aloud without emotion as if reciting a textbook: "Kugavina, the former servant of the House of Hearths, has been found guilty of serious misconduct, and the evidence is conclusive. She is hereby dismissed. Peruvieri, though she attempted to assassinate an executor, had a reason for it, and His Majesty has found her potential and loyalty to be of the highest caliber. Therefore, she is pardoned. Effective immediately, she is given the name Arecino and promoted to the fourth seat of the Fools' Executors, inheriting the title of 'Servant.'"

Peruvelli—now called Arecino—raised her head.

The eyes hidden behind the white hair finally focused, landing on the parchment in the clown's hand. His lips moved slightly, but no sound came out.

The clown continued, "Clementine, who participated in the incident but had no intention of causing harm, is also pardoned. Effective immediately, she will serve as Arecino's second-in-command, assisting her in managing the affairs of the Hearth House."

Clementine visibly relaxed when she heard her name called. Her fingers, which had been gripping the hem of her dress, loosened, and a glimmer of light appeared in her pale emerald green eyes.

Fanes also breathed a sigh of relief. Good, very good, they're both alright. One became the new fourth seat, and the other became the fourth seat's deputy.

So his task was complete, and he could go home now, right? He was still thinking about that leaky attic and the bookstore owner's royalties. He hadn't written a single word for this month's manuscript, and if he didn't submit it soon, the bald owner was afraid he would hang his headshot on the Fontaine bulletin board for all to see.

However, after the clown finished reading the last line of text on the parchment, he didn't put it away. Instead, he turned it over, and there were words on the back of the parchment.

Phanes had a bad feeling.

The clown's lips seemed to twitch slightly. "And, Fanes."

Phanes sat up abruptly.

"Her Majesty the Queen highly praised your adaptability, courage, and decisiveness in this incident after personally reviewing the relevant reports."

The clown paused, seemingly savoring the effect of his next line, "He is hereby promoted to the twelfth position of the Fools' Enforcer, codename 'Young Master.' Effective immediately."

There was a two-second silence in the cell.

Fanes blinked, then blinked again. He turned to look at Clementine, who nodded at him. He then turned to look at Arecino, who gave him a blank look.

Fanes turned his gaze back to the clown.

"……What?"

The clown leisurely folded the parchment and tucked it into his robes, then took a silver badge from his coat pocket and slipped it through the gap in the railing. The badge bore the emblem of the Fools, with a tiny number below it—XII.

Fanes took it blankly and looked at it twice.

The twelfth seat.

The Executor of the Fools.

Young master.

He took a deep breath, countless thoughts racing through his mind—run, but he couldn't run; refuse, but he couldn't refuse; stay and work, but what could a six-year-old do? Serve tea and water or help the Queen write her memoirs?

At this moment, the clown spoke up, his voice carrying a hint of amusement: "Fanes, that's quite a name. Sharing the same name as Tianli and still alive, you've got a lucky life."

Fanes tucked the badge into his pocket—only to realize he had no pockets and could only hold it in his hand—then looked up and gave a standard, bright, six-year-old-like smile.

"Maybe I'm just lucky! By the way, boss, I have a few questions I'd like to ask."

The clown raised an eyebrow: "Ask."

What are the salary and benefits like for the executives of the Fools?

Fanes started counting on his fingers, "How much is the basic salary in Mora per month? Are there performance bonuses? Is there a travel allowance for fieldwork? For a minor like me, is there an extra child labor allowance or nutrition allowance? After all, I'm still growing, I need to drink milk, right?"

The expression beneath the clown mask froze for a moment.

Arecino tilted her head slightly, using her stray hairs to obscure the barely perceptible curve of her lips. Clementine, on the other hand, laughed without restraint, her light emerald green eyes curving into two crescent moons.