Konoha Drunkard

Shanks was sunbathing with his eyes closed on his throne at the school gate when a strong sense of crisis suddenly surged into his heart. Shanks immediately opened his eyes and activated his Observation Haki to find the source of the crisis. His Observation Haki sensed an object covered in flames flying towards him from the sky.

Shanks looked at the object and found it somewhat familiar, especially the pile of white fur.

"Asuma! Look what that is? A shooting star?" The elite class was in the training ground at the time, and Hayate Gekko shouted to Asuma, pointing to something falling from the sky.

"What? Wow, what's that?" A group of kids were also attracted by Moonlight Gale's voice and looked in the direction he was pointing.

"Teacher, what's that? It's about to crash down!" the kids asked Kame Saburo.

"Oh no! Get away quickly!" Although Kame Saburo didn't know what it was, judging from the speed at which it was falling, the people here would be in danger!

"Holy crap!" At the same time, Shanks also sensed that the flying object was Jiraiya. With Jiraiya's flying speed that could create sparks in the air, even the Six Paths Elder couldn't save him if he crashed down.

Shanks activated his full Armament Haki and waited until Jiraiya descended to within his Moonwalk range. Then, he used Moonwalk to reach Jiraiya, grabbed him, and spun around in the air, positioning himself perfectly between Jiraiya and the ground.

"Wow! What's that black person? How can it jump so high!" the little kid exclaimed in surprise as he saw a person with shiny black skin rush into the air and catch a falling object.

"Lord Shanks! That's Lord Shanks! The vice principal is amazing!" At this moment, Asuma realized that the person with all black skin was Shanks, and that Shanks had that special physical ability.

"Four countries! The vice principal is amazing! They fell down!" The little kid stared in disbelief. The legends were true; the vice principal was indeed incredibly strong!

Shanks, carrying Jiraiya, was descending at an increasingly rapid pace!

A loud bang!

Shanks and Jiraiya crashed to the ground at the school gate, the impact creating a large crater, and the airflow from the impact blew the surrounding trees and people on the training ground all over the place.

"What happened? Someone attacked the school?" With such a loud commotion, how could the students and teachers in class not have felt it? The windows were even shattered by the blast of air.

"Lord Shanks! Are you alright?" After the gust of wind subsided, Kame Saburo led a group of kids to the side of the giant crater and shouted.

"Lord Shanks, are you alright? What happened?" At that moment, several ANBU members appeared beside Shanks.

243. The aura of sleaziness was overwhelming.

"I'm fine! Get Jiraiya to the hospital right away, hopefully he can still be saved!" Shanks, dressed entirely in black, stood up and handed Jiraiya, whose chest was already caved in, to the Anbu. One look at the injury and you could tell it was the work of his beloved niece.

I don't know how Jiraiya offended Tsunade again. This was clearly a punch from Tsunade that surpassed her peak power. The fact that Jiraiya is still alive is entirely due to the powerful regenerative ability of the Sage Chakra from Mount Myōboku that remained in his body.

"Lord Shanks! Are you alright?" Kame Saburo and the other Anbu members carried Jiraiya to Shanks' side.

For so many years I'd only heard about it but never seen it in person. This time, seeing Shanks save people up close was absolutely shocking! It's incredible that someone could withstand such a huge impact and emerge unscathed. Look at the huge crater in the ground, it's just too awesome! The boss is indeed the boss.

"Haha, it's nothing! I'm the toughest man in the ninja world!" Shanks saw a group of kids behind his underlings and seized the opportunity to brag.

"Four Kingdoms! The vice principal is amazing! He was hit by that force and he's completely unharmed!" The surrounding extras chimed in enthusiastically.

"Wow... Wow, that's amazing! He's way better than Daddy!" Asuma stared in shock at Shanks, who was completely black.

.........

"Quick! Notify Lady Tsunade, Lord Jiraiya has been attacked and is critically injured!" Several Anbu members shouted to the nurses in Konoha as they brought Jiraiya to the hospital.

"Oh! Oh!" Several nurses rushed toward Tsunade's office.

"Lady Tsunade, Lord Jiraiya has been attacked and is seriously injured!" Several nurses rushed into the piano department's office.

"Got it! He's not dead, so take him to the emergency room and wait!" Tsunade said domineeringly, holding Garp in her arms.

At the same time, she breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn't expected her punch to be so powerful; she was genuinely afraid she'd killed Jiraiya. She'd only intended to teach this lecher a lesson, but the combined power of her burst attack and Musou attack was unexpectedly immense...

"Yes!! Lady Tsunade!" The nurse hurriedly went to arrange an emergency room for Jiraiya.

In the Hokage's office, Hiruzen Sarutobi was peeking through a crystal ball. He wondered how most of the village knew about the commotion at the Ninja Academy. The moment he saw it through the crystal ball was when Shanks was acting as a human shield for Jiraiya.

Then, seeing the dent in Jiraiya's chest, he knew his beloved student had been beaten up by Tsunade again, but this time Tsunade's power was greater than ever before. He was speechless, wondering why Jiraiya, after watching him for a month, had gone to find Tsunade. Had he lost his mind?

Tsunade handed Garp to a nurse to hold, and then, with her assistant, went to the emergency room. She saw Jiraiya unconscious, his clothes torn to shreds from the sparks generated by friction in the air, and half of his hair burned off.

These are minor issues; the major problem is the dent in his chest from her blast. Such a precise, close-range attack combined with a furious punch—it's only because Kishimoto, the great emperor, didn't kill him that he's still alive...

While Tsunade was in the emergency room trying to save Jiraiya, Shanks also arrived at the hospital intending to find out about the situation from the powerful Tsunade.

He couldn't understand why Jiraiya, with his intelligence, would make Tsunade explode in anger. After a month of such careful observation of Hiruzen Sarutobi, even if things weren't likely to change much, they should at least be progressing in a positive direction. How could he make Tsunade so furious? That punch just now would have been dangerous even for Madara Uchiha, the Blue Giant on the verge of death!

"Haruko, where's Tsunade?" Shanks arrived at the hospital and saw Haruko holding little Garp at the entrance of the emergency room.

"Tsunade is inside treating Jiraiya. What happened? How did Jiraiya get so badly injured?" Haruko asked, looking towards the emergency room.

"Who in Konoha could inflict injuries like that on someone other than Tsunade? The ceiling in the lobby hasn't even been repaired yet, didn't you see? He just happened to fly into the school today and I ran into him. I reckon he'll be chatting with his wooden sculpture by this time next year..." Shanks said helplessly.

"...I've been organizing files all day and haven't left the office..." Haruko-sama was speechless.

"Who knows what happened?" Shanks said, patting his shoulder.

"Uncle, is the pervert dead?" Not long after, Kushina and Minato arrived. When they heard that Jiraiya had been attacked, Minato was completely confused!

Who would dare attack Jiraiya in Konoha and beat him up like this? In Minato's view, only Tsunade could seriously injure Jiraiya. However, as a disciple, he still had to come and care about his teacher after he was beaten. Kushina was just there to watch the show.

"He's not dead yet, but he'll be soon!" Shanks rolled his eyes at Kushina. Heaven knows why this girl hates Jiraiya so much. Jiraiya is her man's teacher, even though he's a bit lecherous... But isn't Hiruzen Sarutobi also lecherous?

"He's not dead yet!" Kushina said, sounding somewhat disappointed. That lecherous guy was still alive; he'd corrupt Minato again.

"..." Shanks looked at the girl's expression. Just how much do you want him to die?

"Teacher, who attacked Jiraiya-sensei?" Minato asked Shanks in confusion.

"Uh...it must have been Tsunade. Didn't you see the ceiling there when you came in?" Shanks said, pointing towards the hall.

"Someone rushed in and didn't notice that Lady Tsunade went all out this time. Could it be that Jiraiya-sensei's training wasn't effective?" Minato asked, stroking his chin.

"It should have some effect, but the results won't be immediate," Shanks said, stroking his chin as well.

"What are you two talking about?" Kushina looked at the two of them, completely bewildered.

"We're trying to change Jiraiya-sensei's demeanor, but it doesn't seem to be working. Otherwise, he wouldn't have been beaten up like this by Tsunade-sama." Minato was completely open with Kushina, a typical henpecked husband.

"...I only see a lecherous and sleazy aura about that lecherous guy!" Kushina looked speechlessly at her boyfriend and uncle.

"That's different. When you first saw the Hokage, what did you think of him?" Shanks asked Kushina.

“Uh… a kind old man,” Kushina said, recalling the first time she saw Hiruzen Sarutobi.

"Isn't that it? If you didn't know him for a long time, you wouldn't know that he and Jiraiya share the same hobby. Aura can also be packaged. Just like your uncle, I usually seem crazy, but when I get serious, even your Aunt Haruko is captivated by me!" Shanks said proudly, ignoring the Tenseigan around him.

"...What does this have to do with the lecherous guy getting beaten up? Could it be that his lewd aura was too overwhelming and Tsunade exposed him?" Kushina's sharp tongue awakened.

244. Lord Danzo is too invincible!

"..." Shanks looked at Kushina with surprise. He never expected that the usually eccentric Kushina could be so sharp-tongued. No wonder his son's verbal skills were so sharp.

"What? Am I wrong?" Kushina asked when Shanks looked at her in surprise.

"You're right, Jiraiya was too hasty. How can decades of charisma be so easily packaged?" Shanks said helplessly. Unless Kishimoto is willing to draw him and Tsunade together, the chances of success for someone like Jiraiya are very slim.

Just then, the emergency room lights came on, and Piano came out.

"How are you? You're not dead, are you?" Shanks asked Tsunade.

"He's not dead yet. All his ribs are broken, causing internal bleeding, but the ribs didn't pierce his heart," Tsunade said calmly.

"Thank goodness he's not dead!" Shanks breathed a sigh of relief. If this pivotal character in the Naruto storyline were to die, who would be the savior's teacher? Him? ...That was impossible. No teacher in Konoha had a good ending...

"He's still unconscious and will wake up soon, so don't disturb him." Tsunade said and then walked away gracefully, forgetting that she was the one who beat Jiraiya up like this.

"Let's go back too. We'll come see Jiraiya again in a couple of days when he wakes up." Shanks said, and then left with Minato and Kushina.

........

"Jiraiya, are you feeling better?" A week later, Jiraiya woke up, and Shanks and the others came to his hospital room.

"Aside from a slight pain in my chest, I'm fine now," Jiraiya said blankly, lying on the bed. He couldn't remember what had happened.

"By the way, Jiraiya, why did Lady Tsunade beat you up so badly this time?" Kurenai asked curiously. She'd beaten him before, but only...

"I don't know what happened. That morning I was going to the hospital to see Tsunade, and then I ran into her in the lobby. After that, I don't remember what happened. I just felt like I was flying in the sky, and when I woke up I was like this." Jiraiya thought for a while but still couldn't figure out what had happened.

"You didn't lose your memory after being hit by Tsunade, did you? But she clearly hit you in the chest," Sakumo Hatake said.

"I really can't remember." Jiraiya lay on the bed staring at the ceiling, unable to recall what had happened.

"Great scientist, can you explain this to me? Do severely injured people really lose their memories of that day?" Shanks asked the all-knowing Snake.

"...I don't know much about medicine, but this idiot's big nerve might be the reason why his brain subconsciously forgot that memory," Snake said, looking at his mortal friend.

"Damn Orochimaru! What did you say? Who's crazy?!" Jiraiya was so excited when he heard Orochimaru still mocking him that he almost jumped up and challenged Orochimaru to a duel.

"Your injuries haven't healed yet, so don't move around too much. Don't mess with my niece for a while, or you'll be in the cemetery," Shanks said, patting him on the shoulder.

"I have no idea what happened!" Jiraiya said, feeling wronged. This was the first time he hadn't known why he had been beaten by Tsunade, and it was even more brutal than the time before!

"I think you're just too impatient. How could you possibly hide your habits of so many years in just one month... It would probably take Orochimaru several years to imitate your chuunibyou style!" Shanks said helplessly.

"Is that really true?" Jiraiya looked at the quiet Orochimaru and imagined him standing with his hands on his hips, laughing loudly, or peeping from the roof of the bathhouse... Jiraiya felt a chill.

"Idiot!" Snake knew from the look in this idiot's eyes that he was imagining some strange scene again.

"Of course, you need to practice slowly, and especially stop looking at those little notebooks. Let your hands rest," Shanks asked.

"No way, let me tell you a secret: I've discovered that my hand seal speed is getting faster and faster..." Jiraiya said smugly, looking at them.

"..." Everyone was speechless. Let him die. They would never come to see him again.

"Are you sure your hand seal speed is super fast?" Snake asked, his eyes gleaming.

"..." Shanks looked at Snake. For Snake, nothing else mattered as long as he improved his strength.

“That’s right, I can now do six seals a year.” Jiraiya said proudly, this was a secret he had discovered in recent years.

"..." Shanks looked at Orochimaru and Jiraiya, not daring to imagine Orochimaru using his hands. Jiraiya was really amazing, actually managing to discover a method to train hand speed.

Shanks watched as Jiraiya began to exude a strong aura of lewdness again. Kushina was right; this guy was beyond saving. Let's just wait for the finale...

.........

At the Root of Konoha, Danzo looked at the four pairs of three-tomoe jade ornaments in his hand. He could have had more, but his best friend Hiruzen Sarutobi told him to stop and not to touch the Uchiha for the next few years because they were no longer advisors to Konoha. So he could only hold back for the time being and wait until he could appease his best friend and return to being an advisor before making a move. It was just a pity that he missed this rare opportunity.

"Have you found out where those three brats from the Land of Rain are?" Danzo asked Ryuma, the old horse-headed woman.

"Lord Danzo, they are still in the Land of Rain. Their organization has grown considerably in number, but they are mostly orphans or wandering ninja, posing no threat to Hanzo of the Salamander," said Ryuma Aburame.

“Then let’s give them some more time. We’ll make our move once they’ve developed enough to pose a threat to Hanzo.” Danzo’s eyes gleamed.

"Lord Danzo is truly a man of extraordinary wisdom! Under his leadership, we will eventually unify the ninja world!" Aburame Ryoma has also begun to learn some flattery techniques from Yamanaka Hiro, but his flattery skills are not yet mature enough.