Konoha Drunkard

"Could it be a male parent?" Lazy Lu Jiu rolled his dead fish eyes.

"No way! Everyone knows that the women in your family are more domineering than the men!" Shanks laughed.

"Hahaha!" A group of kids burst into laughter.

"Ugh!" Lazy Lu Jiu looked up at the sky, sensing he'd get a beating from his mom again tonight.

"Last semester's assessment results were really bad. Your shuriken and kunai were worse than mine. The best score was actually by Hizashi. Are you guys kidding me? Shoot all these shuriken and kunai out of the sealing scroll this morning." Shanks finished speaking and poured out a pile of shuriken and kunai as high as a small mountain from the sealing scroll.

"Huh? No way? So much!" The friend looked at the mountain of broken copper and scrap metal.

Suddenly everything went black. The worst part was that there were so many shurikens and kunai inside. What the hell was going on? Some of the kunai were even chipped and broken. Teacher, where did you pick up this junk from?

Shanks saw the disdainful look his friends were giving him and said, "Haha! Don't worry about the details. This is a friendly donation from the Hokage. If you finish throwing these this morning, you can put them down early this afternoon! Hurry up, or you won't even be able to throw shuriken and kunai accurately when you're out in the world. Don't say you know me."

"..." The kids were all dejected, showing no joy at being dismissed early! They didn't even know if they'd be able to finish shooting at this crappy junk after school this afternoon!

103. In this world, everyone wants to rise to the top. (Seeking first subscription, seeking further subscriptions)

"I'm back!" Lazy Lu Jiu dragged his tired body slowly into the house.

"Hey, young man, how come you have no energy at such a young age?" A flirtatious and exaggerated voice rang out.

"Well! The teacher is here too." Lazy Shikaku's pupils contracted slightly.

"Haha, it's been a long time since I've tasted Nara's sister-in-law's cooking. Your dad's home today too, so I came over for a couple of drinks. Come on, have a seat. Is school that tiring? You look so listless." Shanks didn't treat himself like a guest.

"..." Lazy Lu Jiu lay sprawled on the ground, staring at the sky. "It's all your fault."

"Haha, Nara-sister-in-law, we're all family, no need to be so polite. Just make a couple of dishes. Your Shikaku did so well at school today, he's improved so much in the last three months!" Shanks said with a smile to the Nara woman who was busy in the kitchen.

"..." The lazy father and son looked up at the sky, not even a ghost would believe this.

"Really? I thought he was slacking off again, Shanks-sama. Shikaku, you've really gone to a lot of trouble!" The women of Nara clearly lacked the intelligence of the men.

"Haha! What trouble? It's just that Shikaku has improved so much that he's never interested in competitions with a bunch of little brats. Look, on the first day of school, he gave up from start to finish and was last in every single one! Sigh! Being such a genius must be so lonely and lonely, don't you think, Shikaku-kun?" Shanks said with a smile to the lazy Shikaku.

"What! You brat, are you slacking off again? Wash the dishes after dinner tonight, and then write me a 10-word guarantee!" The Nara woman, with a ladle in her left hand and a kitchen knife in her right, unleashed her full Conqueror's Haki and fiercely addressed the lazy Shikaku.

"Pfft!" Shanks stared wide-eyed at the lazy Shikaku. "10 words? You made that up?!"

"Yes, Mom!" Lazy Shikaku rolled his eyes at Shanks, indicating that 10 words would be a piece of cake!

Shanks looked up at the sky and thought, "This kind of person is born in the wrong world."

Shanks and Shikaku Nara drank until very late before going home. They would often go out for drinks with friends and occasionally trick the lazy Shikaku. This kind of peaceful life was really comfortable!

However, at this moment, in the Hokage's office, the four giants of Konoha were having a round table meeting.

"The border skirmishes have intensified again recently. After more than a decade of rest, the major villages are almost ready for another major battle. Hiruzen, we need to prepare as soon as possible," analyzed Koharu Utatane, the 39-year-old "Flower of Konoha."

"Hiruzen, I suggest we strike first and launch an attack on the Sand Village!" Danzo was excited. Although he wasn't the Hokage now, if he unified the ninja world in the future, he could still achieve eternal fame.

Hiruzen Sarutobi shook his head after hearing his best friend's words, "Right now it's just friction, and it hasn't escalated to the point of starting a war."

"You..." Danzo stared intently at Hiruzen Sarutobi, then turned to look at Mitokado Homura, who seemed lost in thought, actually pondering what to cook for dinner... Marrying a wife who can cook is such a hassle... except for putting in a bit too much soy sauce.

He looked at Konoha's Flower, Koharu Utatane, who snorted at him coldly. Wouldn't starting a war put her godson in even greater danger? Don't even think about it.

Danzo was even more annoyed by Koharu Utatane's behavior. Back then, he thought that Uchiha Kagami had gotten married and that he had a chance, but Uchiha Kagami still had an ambiguous relationship with Koharu Utatane, and even their son's name had the character "Haru" in it.

Later, after Uchiha Kagami died, he thought his chance had come again, but Koharu Utatane actually helped Uchiha Kagami pick up his belongings and became increasingly unfriendly to him.

Now, every time he sees Uchiha Haru, he gets furious. He's becoming increasingly resentful of the Uchiha clan. If it weren't for the Uchiha, his son with Haru would be older than Sarutobi Shinnosuke.

"Hmph! You'll regret this later," Danzo said, slamming the door shut as he left.

"Sigh!" Hiruzen Sarutobi sighed as he watched Danzo's retreating figure. Love, ah, it's so damn powerful. It turned the once cheerful and sunny Konoha boy, Danzo, into this monstrous state.

Shanks happened to be passing by the Hokage Building at that moment and saw Danzo storming out.

Although I've grown somewhat distant from Danzo in recent years, we had a pretty good relationship when we were kids.

"Hey, Elder Danzo, what's going on? Did Elder Koharu dump you again? It's okay, four-legged men are hard to find, but two-legged girls are plentiful. Come on, I'll take you to the Sapphire Quarter, all kinds of flavors for you to choose from, it's on me!" Shanks said, reeking of alcohol, as he pulled him toward the Sapphire Quarter.

"Hmph! Getting worse and worse!" Danzo pulled his hand away, snorted at the obviously drunk Shanks, and left. He didn't dare stay with Shanks any longer; that guy could hear what people were thinking. Sure enough, he had just come out when Shanks found out that Shanks had seen through him. If Shanks stayed any longer, Konoha would know he was doomed by tomorrow.

Danzo was actually mistaken. Shanks only wanted to tease Danzo when he came out of the Hokage Building looking like that, but who knew Danzo would be so accurate.

"Sigh! What a fine young man from Konoha he used to be, and he's turned into this mess all because of a woman and the Hokage position!" Shanks looked up at the sky at a 45-degree angle.

"If you have time to lament about life here, you should spend some time with your daughter. What kind of father are you?" Konoha no Hana's voice came from behind.

"Haha! What happened? Look at Danzo's face. You didn't dump him again, did you?" Shanks laughed loudly.

Koharu Utatane ignored his last sentence, "The border friction is intense. It seems that peace cannot be maintained for more than a few years. Danzo wants Konoha to launch a war against Sunagakure."

"Tch! I thought it was something serious. They've been resting for almost 20 years, and now every region is teeming with powerful forces. Besides, the first leader has been dead for so many years. When you're out in the game, who doesn't want to rise to the top!" Shanks spoke with the tone of a gangster boss.

"You also think they will launch a war against Konoha?" Koharu Utatane looked at him. Although it was unreliable, her analysis was not bad.

"We're all in this together. We've been recruiting and building up our ranks for so many years. Even if we don't want to fight, who doesn't have a few Danzos under their command? It's only a matter of time. Besides, if we don't fight, how will those talented ninjas rise to prominence? Ask Jiraiya and the others. Who doesn't want to be famous in the ninja world? All the geniuses in Konoha have this ambition, let alone those gold panners in Sunagakure. They're exposed to the sun and rain every day, it's exhausting!" Shanks shrugged.

"Sigh! I wonder how many more people will die on the battlefield then..." Koharu sighed, looking at the moon.

"When you're in the game, you're not always free to do what you want! But let me make this clear first: if the time comes, you'll have to ask me to go to the Land of Lightning battlefield. I don't want to go to the Sand Village, and as for Onoki... he's a cunning guy I can't handle. But the Third Raikage is different; he's a good brother." Shanks first secured Koharu Utatane's vote.

"The fight hasn't even started yet, and you're already scheming like this," Xiaochun rolled her eyes at him and walked away.

104. Mito passed away. "Please subscribe and make your first purchase."

"How about that? At your age, still playing peeping games?" Shanks said to the Hokage Tower behind him after seeing Koharu Utatane leave.

"Ahem! I just came out for some fresh air." Hiruzen Sarutobi coughed to ease the awkwardness.

"Hiruzen Sarutobi! I have something very serious to ask you! It's been so many years, and I only just realized it recently." Shanks, reeking of alcohol, approached Hiruzen Sarutobi.

Hiruzen Sarutobi "?_?"

"Answer me honestly, have you ever slept with a white-haired girl in the Red Bronze Zone? Jiraiya is your illegitimate son, right? No wonder you took him as your disciple!" Shanks said to himself.

"Cough cough! ⊙▽⊙ There's no such thing! Don't go around saying things like that!" Hiruzen Sarutobi coughed violently, his chest heaving, perhaps from opium use.

Shanks scoffed at him, "Why are you getting so worked up? Do you think I'm the kind of person who talks nonsense everywhere? I just have a suspicion."

"Alright, don't say things like that again! Just now you seemed pretty sure another big battle was going to happen?" Hiruzen Sarutobi looked at him seriously.

"Nonsense, you're always concerned about the happiness index of the girls in Konoha. Why don't you also pay attention to the inner turmoil of the men in Konoha? Everyone's got one foot in the grave. If you have the strength, who wouldn't want to make a name for themselves in the ninja world or avenge their deceased family members? Besides, your village is Konoha. If you were the Kage of another village, you'd probably be drooling over Konoha too," Shanks said with certainty.

"..." After hearing this, Hiruzen Sarutobi puffed away on his opium, while Shanks, unable to bear the secondhand smoke, staggered home with drunken steps.

......

In the 32nd year of Konoha, outside a small house in Konoha, the Anbu leader led a team on guard. The four leaders of Konoha stood outside the house with serious expressions. Inside, Shanks and Tsunade stared at Mito and Kushina sitting on the bed with bloodshot eyes.

Mito, holding Lingling, smiled at Kushina and said, "Kurama is very well-behaved. It's not as scary as you think, hehe. It's even afraid of Shanks. You need to be patient with it and use love to win it over."

"..." Nine-Lama rolled his eyes inside her stomach.

Kushina nodded through gritted teeth, tears streaming down her face.

Mito looked at Tsunade and Nawaki, "I'm most worried about you two siblings. I never imagined that Hashirama, that big idiot, would pass on his gambling habit to you, Tsunade, while you, Nawaki, inherited his tendency to get hot-headed. Sigh!"

"Grandma, I think gambling is great!" Tsunade said, tears streaming down her face just like Nawaki.

"Haha! The first time I met Hashirama, he was gambling with his clansmen. I really miss those days," Mito laughed.

Then, looking at Shanks, he said, "Silly boy, you're a father now, what's there to cry about? Everyone dies eventually. I'm content just to see you grow up, get married, and have children. Haruko, Shanks will be in your hands from now on." He then looked at Haruko as he finished speaking.

"And there's our lovely Lingling. Even though Grandma won't be around anymore, Lingling, you still have to eat well, listen to your mom and dad, and grow up happily, okay?" Mito said lovingly to the Fourth Emperor's mother.

"Grandma, where are you going? Why aren't you taking Lingling with you?" Fourth Madam asked in a childish voice.

"Grandma is going to a very far place. Lingling is too young to go." After Mito finished speaking to Lingling, he told them to go out and call Hiruzen Sarutobi inside.

Soon after, Hiruzen Sarutobi came out carrying Lingling, leaving only Mito and Kushina inside.

"Kurama, do you remember what you promised before?" Mito said to Kurama in her heart.

"Hmph! Since I promised, I will naturally keep my word." Even though Kurama was sealed, it remained as arrogant as ever. It knew it couldn't escape its fate of being sealed this time; that red-haired brat was getting stronger and stronger, especially the aura it had unleashed upon awakening. Thinking about it now still made it a little apprehensive.

After hearing Kurama's words, Mito said to Kushina, "Kushina, close your eyes and relax. Kurama will be over soon. He's not scary. There are some people who are more scary than him."

Shanks and his crew outside sensed a huge fluctuation of power coming from inside the house, which disappeared shortly afterward.

This means that the previous era has passed and a new era is about to begin.

.....

In the 34th year of Konoha, in the Konoha Cemetery, Shanks sat in front of Mito's grave, drinking sake from a bottle one sip after another. "Well, Aunt, Linlin is over four years old now. Don't worry, she's happy every day. Tsunade and the others are doing well too. Nawaki is still getting beaten up by Tsunade every day, just like before. I'm really worried that one day he'll be beaten silly and another world war will break out. Then I might not be able to come and visit you every day. Please remember to say hello to Uncle and Second Uncle for me from below."

Two years have passed since Mito passed away, and Shanks visits her every day to talk to her. Ever since he came into this world, Mito has been with him every day. Even after he grew up and traveled around, the first thing he did when he got home was to visit Mito and talk to her.

But after Mito's death, Shanks felt an emptiness in his heart every time he returned home. Although Mito's house was still spotless, she was no longer there, and no one teased him anymore.

"Lord Shanks, the Hokage is looking for you!" An Anbu member appeared behind Shanks.

"Okay, I'll be there in a bit," Shanks said, glancing at Mito's grave. "I'm leaving now, I'll come visit you again sometime." He then closed his eyes.

←↓→↑←↓→↓→!

When Shanks arrived at the office, Tsunade and Jiraiya were already inside. Orochimaru was probably off on another mission with Nawaki. Shanks felt sorry for Orochimaru; he already had a brainless idiot as a teammate, and now Hiruzen Sarutobi had given him another brainless disciple, who was just as lecherous.

"Hey, today's a good day. Tsunade isn't gambling, and Jiraiya isn't studying the female human body either," Shanks chuckled.

"Damn it! I'm busy every day, unlike you who has so much free time," Jiraiya retorted angrily.

Tsunade ignored him, already planning to trick Big Mom into handing over his secret stash of money tonight.

“Ahem, I called you here because every village is preparing for war now, and you can’t stay cooped up in school all the time, so I’m planning to have you, Tsunade, and Jiraiya each lead a class,” Hiruzen Sarutobi said, puffing on his opium.

"No way! I'm not a ninja anymore. If I take students out with me, wouldn't that be a slap in the face? How am I supposed to face the ninja world after this? No way!" Shanks showed absolutely no mercy.

105. This excuse is very much like Tsunade's "Please subscribe, please make an initial purchase" request.

Hiruzen Sarutobi looked at Shanks with a headache; he was so old, yet he acted like a child.

"You absolutely must take them this time. I've already assigned them to you. You'll take the three children from the Ino-Shika-Cho family. Didn't you want to go to the Land of Lightning after the war broke out? That's the condition." Hiruzen Sarutobi sounded like a creepy uncle trying to abduct a little girl.

Upon hearing this, Shanks shamelessly replied, "It's impossible not to bring them. My relationship with Brother Shika is so good, I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving them with other Jonin. Even if you didn't say anything this time, I would still ask you for permission."

Tsunade wanted to beat this scoundrel to death; he was such a disgrace to her.