mygo, but Cthulhu

…It turned out to be just a misunderstanding on her part, but it was a good thing that Deng didn’t have that intention.

Shoko Toyokawa sighed, looked at the sky which was gradually getting darker, picked up her beer and went home.

She took out the key and opened the door. She was surprised to find that the room had obviously been cleaned carefully. The bastard father was not lying drunk on the floor. Instead, he was sitting on a chair and looking at her calmly. There were two cheap lunch boxes on the table.

"Nobuo has already come to see you, right? How did the conversation go?"

"Very bad,"

Toyokawa Shoko put the beer aside, walked over expressionlessly, and looked down at him.

"Why did you tell him I was pregnant?"

"I can't think of any reason not to tell him. You're just a high school girl now. Getting pregnant out of nowhere is clearly very unusual. Of course, the family needs to be informed."

"That family no longer considers you one of their own,"

Xiangzi sneered.

"You did this without even consulting me. Why? Do you not care about my opinion at all, or do you know something?"

"I don't know anything,"

Toyokawa Koji shook his head slightly, his expression still too calm, as if he no longer cared about anything.

"I just hope you're safe. You have to work and study at the same time, and your body is already exhausted. You're even pregnant... I just hope you won't suddenly collapse one day."

"is it?"

Xiangzi's heart was touched by his words. She pursed her lips, looked at him and spoke softly,

"Then why didn't you tell me anything? The Toyokawa family possesses forbidden knowledge and special powers. You should know this, right? Why didn't you tell me?"

"...It's no good for you to know this in advance. As the heir, you will know it sooner or later. I don't want to let you know this too early."

"So, are you hiding something from me? For example, the reason why your mother committed suicide."

Toyokawa Shoko spoke softly, and Koji opened his eyes wide, his expression suddenly becoming one of shock and pain.

"How did you know?"

“…So you do know.”

Seeing his expression change, Xiangzi felt her vision blurred for a moment. She gritted her teeth and tried to steady herself, then walked forward and stared at him closely.

"Father... why didn't you tell me?! You knew how much pain I was in because of this, and you knew that I never understood why Mother did this... why didn't you tell me?!"

"..."

Toyokawa Koji looked at her helplessly, then lowered his head silently after a moment, while Xiangzi angrily grabbed his collar and forced him to look up and look at her.

"Answer me, why is this happening? Why can you be so indifferent to your mother's death? Why did a business failure make you so depressed? Why have you been afraid to look at me since then?"

"Have you completely forgotten who you were in the past? Have you forgotten that I was able to get out of my pain because of you? You definitely loved my mother, so why didn't you tell me why she chose to commit suicide?!"

"..."

After questioning angrily, she couldn't help but hope that the man in front of her could answer her question, but he still just lowered his head and let her pull the collar to tighten his neck.

"sorry,"

"I don't want an apology, I want you to answer me!"

She pushed him hard in anger, and the man fell to the ground in a mess. Two things fell out of his pocket.

Xiangzi glanced at them subconsciously, and then was stunned. One was a bottle of sleeping pills, and the other was a condom.

"...Why do you have these two things on you?"

At this moment, some dark speculation suddenly flashed through Xiangzi's mind. Her body couldn't help but tremble, but she still tried her best to put the thought aside.

No, that's not possible. No matter how depraved he is, he would never do that...

"sorry,"

The man still did not answer, but continued to apologize with his head down. Xiangzi gritted her teeth in anger as her patience ran out. She grabbed his collar and pulled him up, staring into his eyes.

"Listen, if you keep apologizing, I don't know what I'm going to do. Do you understand?"

"Tell me, why did my mother commit suicide? Also, Toyokawa Nobuo said you might know why I'm pregnant. What does that mean? Do you really know anything about this?"

"...because your mother couldn't bear it anymore,"

After a long silence, Xiangzi suddenly saw the man in front of him began to cry silently. He answered in a low voice in pain, and Xiangzi asked anxiously and quickly,

"Can't stand it anymore? What do you mean? Is someone torturing her? Is someone hurting her?"

"No, I can't say..."

"answer me!"

Toyokawa Shoko roared, and Koji fell to his knees trembling, his face twisted in pain and tears streaming down his face.

"I'm sorry, Xiangzi, it's all my fault... If only I hadn't been so stupid, if only I had noticed it earlier..."

"What do you mean?! Explain clearly! Why is it your fault?!"

The blood seemed to reappear in front of Xiangzi's eyes. She raised her voice anxiously and asked desperately, but Haozhi just cried and kept repeating his apology.

"Stop crying! Tell me quickly, what's going on?!"

Pain, anxiety, anger, and restlessness filled Xiangzi's mind, and a certain power that she had not yet noticed spread rapidly with her urgency.

Yan, poured into her father's brain.

His body began to tremble, and his already painful consciousness was completely disrupted. In a trance, he seemed to see the familiar person standing in front of him.

Xingzi...is that you?

He got up in a daze, slowly hugged his wife, and feeling the real body temperature, he couldn't help crying more painfully.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know it was like that... If I had found out earlier, I would never have touched you. I would never have done that..."

"I'm sorry. I know you were so happy when you were pregnant, but you felt the opposite of me. If only I had noticed..."

"I'm sorry, we weren't supposed to have children."

"..."

At this moment, Shoko Toyokawa felt as if all the blood in her body had frozen.

Chapter 51 Pain

"What did you say?"

Toyokawa Shoko's head was dizzy and painful. She spoke slowly in a hoarse voice, hoping that she had just heard wrongly, but her father's voice, full of tears, still came to her ears.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry... There shouldn't have been any result between us. It's all because of my stupidity and ridiculousness. I shouldn't have had anything to do with you in the first place..."

"So... you admit it?!"

When she realized that she had heard correctly, rage completely consumed Toyokawa Shoko. She roared madly, grabbed his collar, and pushed him hard against the wall with all her strength.

Toyokawa Koji was hit so hard that his whole body was in great pain. He instantly broke away from the hazy dream and found in a daze that the person in front of him was Xiangzi, whose face was twisted to the extreme by crazy anger.

"Xiangzi..."

"You bastard! You damn thing! I've been thinking over and over about what happened... and it turns out it was you who did it!"

He had just uttered a sound when Xiangzi, with a hoarse roar, fiercely grasped his neck, his nails piercing deep into his flesh, causing drops of blood to continuously roll down.

"Why did I break up with my family for you? Why did I have such ridiculous trust in you for so long? Why did I become the daughter of someone like you?!"

She screamed in agony and roared madly. Her rage made her increase the strength of her hands regardless of everything. Toyokawa Koji's mind was in a mess. The feeling of suffocation made him instinctively fight back, but his body, which was worn down by alcohol, could not resist Xiangzi's hysterical power for a while.

"Why... You shouldn't have been like this. You couldn't have done that. You were my beloved father. You were the one who helped me get out of this pain and allowed me to continue living!"

Xiangzi screamed incomprehensibly, and at the same time her vision was blurred by tears. Her heart felt as if it was torn apart, and every part of her body cried out in extreme pain.

Why? He is obviously my father, but he actually did such a thing... Why?

Could such an ugly guy be the same person as the father who held her so tenderly? Why was the world so absurd that she had to endure such torture?

Is this a nightmare? If it is, wake up quickly. She doesn't want to suffer like this anymore. She wants to go back to the past, find the lights and rehearse with them. She wants to walk carefree in the sunshine with her friends, without feeling sad anymore...

Xiangzi felt dazed. These thoughts flashed slowly through her mind, which was on the verge of breaking. She felt as if everything she had was being slowly drained away, and her soul was collapsing bit by bit.

Finally, what appeared before her eyes again was the familiar, distorted face of fear. Her father's eyes were bloodshot to the extreme, and he opened his mouth but couldn't make a sound. He had also lost all strength to resist.

...If he continues like this, he will die.

Xiangzi realized this, and even though she thought her heart had been burned to ashes, the remnants in her chest still beat, causing her hands to tremble.

Don't let go, kill him, he is not your father at all.

She heard her voice ringing in her ears, but looking at the dying face, Xiangzi still couldn't continue to increase her strength. She laughed at herself and slowly let go of her hand.

"Cough cough cough..."

Toyokawa Hiroji immediately knelt on the ground and began coughing in pain. He gasped for breath and his consciousness gradually returned to his body.

"I can't bring myself to kill you... How ironic! Even after seeing your true face, I still can't bring myself to do it."

Toyokawa Shoko looked down at him numbly and sighed silently.

"From now on, you and I have nothing to do with each other. I won't come back here, and I won't help you pay the rent. You have to find a way to survive on your own."

"Goodbye, scumbag, may you drown in your own vomit."

After she finished speaking, she took all her things and turned away without hesitation. After recovering, Toyokawa Koji stared at her back in a daze, wanting to speak hesitantly, but in the end, he kept silent.

After the door was heavily closed, he couldn't help but smile bitterly, turned his head and looked at the sleeping pills and condoms.

When he was first kicked out of the Toyokawa family, he simply relied on alcohol to numb himself, but in recent months he has been tortured by the accumulated pain and guilt and has been unable to sleep, and has had to rely on sleeping pills to rest.

As for the condoms, they were forced upon him by someone through an advertisement, but he didn't expect Xiangzi to see them.

He actually fell into such a trance, it seems that his mental state is not optimistic, although Xiangzi does look very similar to her mother... This is also the reason why he has not dared to look at her since he knew about that incident. Every time he saw those familiar eyebrows and eyes, he would feel unbearable pain.

After gasping for a while, Toyokawa Hiroji struggled to get up from the ground. His bleeding neck was still stinging, but he didn't care about it at all. He just looked at the door silently.

...Xiangzi just misunderstood what he said, but even if she didn't misunderstand, she would probably have disliked him a long time ago.

He was a hopelessly stupid guy, but he would never harm his own daughter. Xiangzi misunderstood this and still didn't kill him... She was really too soft-hearted.

Toyokawa Hiroji sighed deeply. He looked around and remembered how Xiangzi had taken care of her in the past year.

She is obviously just a high school girl, but she has to bear the pressure of life. She broke up with her family for this loser. She worked so hard to make money part-time, but this loser can still shamelessly indulge in alcohol.

At this moment, Toyokawa Koji's heart, which had been filled with pain and guilt since that incident, suddenly calmed down. He no longer tried to escape. He saw through his own despicableness thoroughly, and he also discovered that it was because of him that Xiangzi had fallen to this point.

"I'm sorry, Xiangzi."

He sighed, gave a final apology, and after taking a piece of paper to write down his farewell words, he found a rope and hung it on the support of the ceiling fan.

"But from now on, I won't be a burden to you anymore."

Chapter 52 Collapse

Under the cover of night, Shoko Toyokawa stumbled on the street. She raised her hand to wipe away her tears, gritting her teeth and moving forward step by step.

Even after discovering the guy's true identity, she still couldn't really make up her mind... She was such a ridiculous fool.

Tired and in pain, she sat silently on a bench by the roadside, staring at the ground numbly.

From now on, she is alone. She no longer has any family, and the only person she can trust is herself.

Yes, Shoko Toyokawa, you should know that tears alone cannot solve the problem. You must keep moving forward. There is no other choice.

She took a deep breath, gritted her teeth and stood up to walk forward, but the next moment she saw a dark-skinned man walking towards her. When he saw her, he smiled and handed her a few condoms.

"Hello, Miss, would you like to try our company's newest brand? It's better to be prepared."

Toyokawa Shoko didn't want to pay any attention to him at all, and walked straight past him indifferently, but the next moment, she suddenly realized something and opened her eyes slightly, and quickly turned back to look at him.

"Wait, you've been handing out condoms here all this time?"

"Yeah, that's right. No one else in the company has the nerve to do that. I don't mind."

The man smiled, and Xiangzi suddenly realized a possibility that made her shudder. She trembled and forced out a voice, praying that she was wrong.

"So... have you ever given condoms to a bearded old man?"

"Yes, I did. I just sent it to him yesterday. Even though he didn't want to accept it, I thought he might need it someday."

The man smiled and nodded slightly, and Xiangzi stood there, the man's answer echoing in her mind. Before she could react, her body had quickly turned around and ran desperately towards home.

"No, no... maybe I made a mistake..."