Ikari Shinji's Harem Comedy Daily Life

"Stop arguing!" Katsuragi Misato slammed the table, stopping the US-Soviet rivalry. "You two, study hard, or you'll fail the make-up exam again! I swear, Ikari Shinji, you'll be allowed to stroll around NERV in women's clothing—and as for you, Asuka! I won't do anything to you, but your alma mater will definitely receive a report of your failing the exam."

"?!?!" x2

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"Hmm, hmm... hehe." Akagi Ritsuko looked at the students' grades and glanced at Katsuragi Misato: "Miri, are you really addicted to being a parent now? Oh, I thought you were that... that game we played when we were kids... Oh. Oh, now I remember, you're similar to Pikachu and Satoshi. You seem to be a guardian, but in fact, you're being taken care of by the one you're protecting..."

"Ritsuko!——"

Finally, she was free, and Akagi Ritsuko was enjoying her rare break. Ah, the opening day was so damn cool!

Katsuragi Misato looked at Akagi Ritsuko in front of her with annoyance, and looked at NERV's battle command hall with her hands on her hips: "--Taking a few children is really worrying... The three of them combined can't even give a perfect score."

"As for Rei, she's very obedient—but she's not very good at studying. Honestly, she never really listens in class." Katsuragi Misato clutched her long purple hair in pain, holding her forehead with a sigh. "She used to always look out the window, but now she's always staring at Makoto and Asuka, lost in thought. As for Asuka, she dismisses all the questions in class, and the teacher doesn't even dare to ask her questions—after all, she has a higher degree than the teacher, and it would be humiliating. As for Makoto...all she does in class is promote their country's theories. The whole campus is in danger of turning red. Luckily, for some reason, she's been much more restrained lately."

"Oh?" Akagi Ritsuko took a sip of coffee and said she would wait and see. "Don't worry about the children's affairs. Auntie, think about your future. Don't you plan to get married? I've been waiting for you to bless you."

"...Ritsuko!"

"Haha, are you still planning to remain faithful to your husband? I don't think you'll succeed." "If I drive you away, I can..." "Or I can try to persuade Xiao Zhen. If he likes it, anything is fine."

"Ritsuko!"

"No kidding." Akagi Ritsuko stood up, waved her hand, and left her with a back turn. "We don't know what will happen next, but we're working hard to protect humanity. Before this, they were fighting on the front lines. It sounds strange to say this, but there's nothing wrong with enjoying life while we're still alive."

“?” Ritsuko was not like this before.

Misato Katsuragi sighed, freed from the endless scapegoating reports. She also had a rare break: "Ah... enjoy life while you can... huh?"

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Carpe diem.

Misato Katsuragi was just about to take advantage of the situation when the apostle came to her again.

171 Physical Domination of the Earth

"Ah, my hair is falling out!" Asuka was so excited when she saw Ikari's shooting miss in front of her! She opened her mouth and said in classic German: "Ah! My hair is falling out!"

"Just say it once." Ikari Shinji pushed the other person's pretty face and pushed her away from his gun. "You let me use my left hand and shoot upside down. I'm going to be a fool if I can hit the target every time!"

Shinji Ikari and the other two are at NERV's shooting range.

Asuka and Rei Ayanami were right beside him. It was obvious that Asuka had come today on a mission—she and Rei Ayanami were both incredibly worried. They felt like Ikari had a gun in his hand, and who knew when he'd shoot him in the head again! This wasn't good.

Why not just do it yourself! The adults at NERV aren't trustworthy—after a few brief exchanges with Ayanami, the two of them, in unison, ran over to check on Shinji Ikari's mental state.

"Men shouldn't be so particular about details." Asuka put her hands on her hips and looked at Shinji Ikari, who was shooting handstands. Her eyes were filled with concern, but her mouth didn't let him off at all. "Don't you always brag about your Soviet Union being the best in the world? Come and show me how you can be the best in the world and miss the target?"

"...Hey." Standing up from his handstand, the handsome boy shook his head and looked at the two beautiful girls in front of him: "You...are you busy today?"

If you want to find an honest person, you have to look for Ayanami.

"..." Ayanami turned her head away guiltily - it was rare that she had already started to adopt this posture.

"Don't make things difficult for an excellent student. If you have any problems, come to me." Asuka grabbed Ikari's left hand and said, "You idiot..."

"Thank you—ordinary people wouldn't care about me this much." Ikari laughed and patted Asuka's cheek. This gesture was quite intimate. "But I still have some brains. I won't pull out a gun and shoot a hole in my head at any time. I haven't lived enough."

"Tsk... then you're still taking the medicine given by Akagi..."

"Hahaha, don't worry, Sister Ritsuko has already promised that there will be no problem." Ikari Shinji continued to smile, indicating that he was fine -

"Are you sure it's okay?"

"Hahahahaha..."

"?! Are you sure?"

"Ha ha ha ha--"

"?! Top student! Get the medicine out for this idiot! - Damn it, he's having another attack! I can't ignore him for even a moment!" Asuka and Rei Ayanami quickly took out the medicine that Ikari had brought with him and stuffed it all into his mouth. Mental pollution has indeed begun to intensify again recently -

"Huh... I'm alive again." Xiao Ding wiped his sweat, feeling that he had escaped a disaster again. And now it was not only his current self that had escaped a disaster, but also his future life: "Without you two, I really feel a little..."

"Ikari-kun, please don't say that again."

Ayanami rarely expressed her unwillingness to listen to such discouraging words.

At this moment, the alarm at the base sounded.

Several young boys and girls who were practicing design on the 13th floor underground had to jog all the way to the elevator in the distance. It took them more than ten minutes to reach the dedicated line according to the instructions and go directly to the NERV operations room.

"What's going on?" Xiao Ikari ran to the designated location.

"A new apostle." Akagi Ritsuko didn't react much this time. It seemed the situation wasn't urgent. "It might be a new apostle. We're still confirming it—hmm. Katsuragi has already gone to the front line. She still has to do the investigation herself—"

"We need you..."

"No, we are currently in the intelligence gathering phase. If there is no need to deploy EVAs, what you need is rest and ensure that you have sufficient energy so that you can engage in high-intensity combat at any time." Akagi Ritsuko's eyes flashed, and Seven's head fell to the ground: "Do you understand your responsibilities? Especially... the little boy over there?"

"Uh..." Why are you dissing me? I didn't say a word? Okay, I did say a few words, but you know what I said?

"Katsuragi is an adult, he doesn't need you to supervise him like this... well, that girl is indeed acting as a guardian, doing the work of the ward." Akagi Ritsuko glanced at Ikari Shinji and said, "She can still be relied upon in most cases, probably."

“…”Is it really okay to complain about your best friend like this?

"Yes...so now?"

"Rest. Even I need to rest." Akagi Ritsuko took a sip of coffee. "We can have plenty of rest time before more data comes through. And I suggest you take advantage of this time to rest..."

"Senior!" Suddenly, Maya Ibuki's words froze the elegant doctor in his tracks. "Up ahead, Katsuragi Ichizo has sent back the latest news! The target has been confirmed to be an Apostle! A large amount of data is being transmitted, and the scene has been cordoned off! All monitoring data from the Marine Monitoring Center has been classified as top secret—please receive it immediately."

"I understand." Akagi Ritsuko took a deep breath and instantly turned into a workaholic: "Turn on the receiver and insert the receiving key."

From this statement it seems as if the five lions are about to merge.

Maya Ibuki inserted her key, and then Ritsuko Akagi did the same—the two of them working together. Then, with the same grand gesture as a nuclear missile launcher, they pressed a button. The entire NERV operations headquarters began to bustle even more. "You three remain on standby—everyone, move! Groups one, two..."

When NERV is busy, it really seems like everyone has something to do, but I don't know how much of it is useful.

"New Apostle, this time I'll completely destroy it by myself!"

"That's impossible, the second most suitable person." Ritsuko Akagi looked at the report in front of her, her brows furrowed.

"Why? Who are you looking down on? I..."

"Since we haven't received much data from the front, all we know right now is that this Angel is over 20 kilometers long."

"……?!How many?"

"As far as we know, it's over 20 kilometers long and is still growing rapidly." Akagi Ritsuko suddenly remembered something and said, "It's similar to the earthquake catfish..."

"Earthquake catfish? What is that?" Asuka was confused, and the three pilots present were all confused.

"...Alas, kids these days really don't understand anything. According to ancient Japanese legend, there's a giant catfish on the bottom of the ocean. Whenever the catfish moves, earthquakes occur in Japan."

"Hahaha, what a strange fable..."

"Well, now the fable is basically coming true." Akagi Ritsuko said, holding up the newly transmitted report. "This apostle is still growing, and the current exploration depth is deepening and the breadth is increasing. We have reached 30 kilometers, and there is no end in sight!"

"..." What Xiao Ikari remembered was one of the most terrifying uncontainable objects in a certain SXP.

"This thing..." Xiao Ikari was silent for a moment, then said, "Isn't it trying to physically rule the Earth? How do we defeat it?"

172 Desperate Battle

The largest known organism in the world... is a mushroom. It covers less than ten kilometers—but the largest known animal is the Diplodocus fragilis, which measured eighty meters from head to tail and weighed 220 tons.

A number that is already terrifying.

"Well, according to the data analysis sent back ten minutes ago, this apostle's size has already exceeded forty kilometers. And it's growing very fast, roughly doubling its length every hour—the kind of thing that's compounding."

"? Uh...at this rate of growth." Ikari Shinji pondered for a long time with his meager brain, and all he could think of was Big Ivan, Big Ivan, and Big Ivan. In his mind, there was nothing in this world that Big Ivan couldn't solve. If there was, he'd get another one! If there was still...

The Earth can't withstand the explosion of several big Ivans... No, the Earth may be fine, but humans cannot.

"You're a loser! Idiot! Idiot!" Asuka was furious when she heard this, and she shuddered all over. "Haven't you seen Doraemon? There's an episode where bread keeps growing. It's pretty much like this! But there's also a dynamic function involved."

Ikari listened to Asuka's next scientific questions with a confused look on his face, and then he came to a conclusion in the end -

Even if it doesn't die, the earth will die.

"I understand." Xiao Ding nodded, then asked in return: "It's not easy to solve this 30 kilometers problem, and if it's 3,000 kilometers, it will be even more impossible to solve it——"

"That should only take less than eight hours," Akagi Ritsuko said, glancing at the others present. "The current answer from Magi is that the chance of winning this battle is zero."

"?!"

"I looked back to the tenth place after the decimal point and finally found a 1." Without 1, 0 is nothing. Ritsuko Akagi rarely showed her sense of humor.

"At this critical moment when the world is in danger - what have you done, Commander Ikari?" Little Ikari began to diss his own father.

"He went to the United Nations with the deputy commander. NERV headquarters may not be able to solve this problem on its own. What's more, this thing was found in the Pacific Ocean." After everyone was gone, Akagi Ritsuko began to serve as old Ikari's confidant. As a scientific and technological personnel, she held the imperial seal and axe and commanded all military forces inside and outside the country.

"Is it possible that this is a joint operation with other EVA machines?"

"That's impossible—the EVAs of other countries haven't been completed yet. Even if they're rushing it, two of them are only in the final stages and can't be put into combat right now."

It was a good idea. Ikari suddenly remembered the plot in "Iron Sky 1". The United States thought it was the only one that could go to heaven and save the world, but in the blink of an eye, it found that every country in the world (except Sweden) was secretly developing secret weapons.

Russia has not abandoned the Mir space station——

"Ah," Xiao Ikari sighed and said, "Then let's just hope for a miracle—for example, in times of crisis, every country actually has more than 10 EVAs hidden and not released."

"That's simply impossible. The creation of EVA is the result of the concerted efforts of all nations. It's not something that can be accomplished by just one country. Unless..." Akagi Ritsuko, a Japanese scientist, pinched her nose and said with a headache, "The top three of the five permanent members are causing trouble again!"

Japan knows nothing, and considering this, it's truly terrifying. Especially since the Three Constants were recently instigated, the EVA's terrifying combat capabilities have already been demonstrated. The existence of a single soldier with nearly unstoppable breakthrough capabilities is like seeing tanks in World War I or the atomic bomb in World War II—this is an epoch-making combat weapon.

Fortunately, Seele hid well, otherwise NERV would be no match for the Five Constant Virtues.

"I hope so. Do you really think you can save the world with just the Japanese? — Just a sacrifice, a desperate struggle for survival." Ikari saw everything very clearly, mainly due to his current status: "This time, there is absolutely no way to fight this battle?"

"Well, it should have been completely unexpected, but Misato has brought us a new turning point." Akagi Ritsuko pointed to the combat command station in front. "The Angel's purpose is to contact Adam under NERV. Theoretically, it is not to destroy the Earth. On the contrary, in order to be able to contact Adam, there should be a special contact point. This time, the Angel has taken a different approach. If it is as big as the Earth, there is really no need for contact or not - it is already part of the Earth, so it just needs to be big enough."

"? What should we do now?"

"Look at his head there! This S2 mechanism..." Suddenly, a gleam flashed in Akagi Ritsuko's eyes, and Jack's head fell to the ground. "This should be the largest S2 mechanism ever!"

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"Quantitative change leads to qualitative change. The enemy we encounter this time is different."

Less than an hour later, Ritsuko Akagi held another meeting - this time to directly arrange combat tasks.

The combat missions are so horrific that it’s frightening just to watch.

"I won't say much. Every second, that thing is getting more terrifying. In less than a day, it will be able to circumnavigate the equator. In less than a week, it will fill the entire Pacific Ocean—theoretically, this is completely impossible. But—here, the S2 mechanism has been found. But when our people went to investigate, none of them returned." After a pause, Ritsuko Akagi added, "Whether it was operated by a person or a drone."

“…”Oh, how many unlucky people were ordered into prison by their superiors when they had no idea of ​​the situation?

"But we've confirmed the exact location of the S2 agency," Akagi Ritsuko said. In the darkened combat headquarters, a giant screen at the back projected a map of the Pacific Ocean. "This is the most crucial location for the operation, and it's where the S2 agency is located!"

"? Where is this place?" Xiao Ding's knowledge of geography is not very good. Unless it is a tactical map, otherwise...

Mariana Trench? Asuka knew exactly where this place was at a glance. A look of shock lingered in her eyes: "Why are we here?"

"Uh... where?"

"...Stupid Shinji, is your brain made of muscle? Aren't you usually pretty impressive? How come you don't even know about the Mariana Trench?"

"I've only heard about it. The specific location is in the Pacific... That's the business of the Pacific Red Navy. I don't fight guerrilla warfare in the trenches, I only fight guerrilla warfare in the mountains." Ikari Shinji's brain suddenly stopped working, he had touched upon a blind spot in his knowledge. Being a wimp is his original sin. He could only let Asuka ride on his face and humiliate him, let Asuka ride on his neck, let Asuka ride on him, let Asuka ride on...

All in all, what a shame!

"The deepest point is eleven kilometers, the furthest point is six kilometers, and the average depth is eight kilometers—it's a hopeless place, the least suitable place on Earth for life. Yet, even here, the flower of life can bloom." Akagi Ritsuko's recent words have been more humane: "The apostle is slowly growing here, and is beginning to show signs of leaving the trench. The above statement is that this apostle must be completely destroyed when it can no longer move! Otherwise, the Pacific coast will face the most terrible disaster..."

"what?"

"All coastal countries are facing a devastating disaster. Evacuations have already begun in the Pacific region. The S2 mechanism here uses an even stranger structure to support such a massive column. The entire S2 mechanism continues to expand, becoming increasingly thinner..."

"Thin? Getting bigger? Wouldn't that mean it could be shattered with just one blow?"

"On the contrary, as they grow larger, they become increasingly difficult to capture. There's a 0.0003mm barrier on the surface. Passing this barrier requires an AT position and the assistance of EVAs. Only then can we destroy the Angels in the Mariana Trench! This time, Unit-01 will conduct the assault!"

I originally wanted to use Unit 2 as cannon fodder, but without a strong AT position to break through, you are not even qualified to be cannon fodder.

"Hey, hey, hey, why is this idiot taking the lead again this time? I..." Asuka was very unhappy, and she also wanted to share the firepower.

"Follow the order. Unit-0 and Unit-2 are on standby. Misato will assign you the latest missions upon arrival. I'll just give you a rough outline. Operations should be conducted quickly! Transport directly in the plugs—"

"Eh? So inhumane?" Asuka glanced at Ayanami and put her hand on her shoulder with an American look on her face: "Hey, Number One, did you work in such a shady company before? Don't these adults treat you as a human being?"

"It doesn't matter." Xiao Ding shook his head and said, "Obeying orders and following instructions is a good way to win battles. It's not like they haven't done direct airdrops during air transport before, so there's no need to separate the man and the machine."