Ikari Shinji's Harem Comedy Daily Life

"Really... Hey! What do you mean?"

"That is to say - I like you, and they like you too. Based on this, I asked them what they thought - I want to live with you, even if my life may be so short. But at the most brilliant moment, I want to bloom with you."

"?! — Are you sick?! You said something like that at this time, I can't refuse you! Bastard! Scumbag! — If you're like this at such a young age, what will happen to you when you grow up? Die!"

Misato Katsuragi rode on Shinji Ikari's body, with her hands loosely around the beautiful boy's neck, performing a classic scene.

"...It feels so good." Shinji Ikari said as he gently patted Katsuragi's hand.

--------------------------

In the end, it was Xiao Ding who gave the report.

In the command hall of NERV, little Ikari first saw his biological father, Ikari Gendo, whom he had killed with his own hands in the previous world.

"Yeah, here he comes." Ikari Gendo decided to PUA his own son.

After all, they're young, easily fooled. Young men between the ages of 18 and 35 are easily lured into the battlefield, gushing with passion—you don't want to die, but there are plenty who do! But Ikari Gendo took one look at Ikari's attire and, frankly, felt a little intimidated.

He was wearing the uniform of a Soviet colonel, with the Order of the Republic hanging on his chest, a Gold Star Medal headed by the Hero of the Soviet Union on his left chest, and a row of medals below that would make even the emperor cry with envy.

It is obvious that you, seele, are nothing. I am a proletarian fighter of the Soviet Socialist Union Republic. Who the hell do you think you are!

"Yes, Commander." Xiao Ikari saluted directly, and there was no warmth of family affection in the conversation.

"You did a good job this time." To be honest, the fact that Little Ikari didn't care about the father-son relationship made him feel uncomfortable. Old Ikari nodded and said, "But SEELE has an inquiry to begin... Well done, stand on the podium and start answering the inquiries."

199 My backers are two of the top three people, who are you?

Shinji Ikari was summoned to Seele's interrogation platform, which was a place of torture in a sense.

It's just that these people don't dare to do anything to him.

"You, are Ikari Shinji, the third most suitable candidate, right?"

"Yes! I am Shinji Ikari, a Red Army commander of the Soviet Union, Colonel of the 1st Guards Armored Division, and Honorary Colonel of the People's Republic of China - Shinji Ikari."

These two big brothers are my umbrellas of protection, try to touch one of them.

"..." Just try it, do you think we haven't infiltrated? Although it's more difficult than infiltrating European and American countries with strong theocratic attributes, you are not a monolithic entity.

"No need to answer useless questions..." An old man's voice was very impatient.

"Who are you? How dare you say my country and the communist cause are useless? I'm here to consult with you. Your useless organization isn't even affiliated with the United Nations. Who do you think you are?"

Shinji Ikari immediately rebelled.

"Alright, there's no point letting a young man get angry." No. 01 Lu Ji immediately jumped in to smooth things over. After all, this interrogation confirmed one thing—that Ikari was a Communist spy planted within NERV's Japanese headquarters. Everything he said now would undoubtedly be passed on to the Communists. "Our next question is also about the Apostle—you entered the imaginary dimension, correct?"

"According to the introduction of the outstanding Soviet scientist and expert group and NERV's most outstanding scientist, Ms. Ritsuko Akagi, I should have entered the imaginary space." Ikari Shinji nodded, his upright posture not afraid of the monsters in front of him at all.

There was no need for Xiao Ikari to see the dead.

"So, when you were swallowed by the apostle into the imaginary space, was it because you were not fighting well? Or did you enter on purpose? Or were you completely unable to resist?"

"As the world's best EVA pilot, as the pilot with the best driving data, as the NERV combatant with the most extensive combat experience—the battles against the Angels were the most intense, and the most experienced. Based on my ten years of combat experience, all my reactions and responses at the time were timely, objective, and rational. There was no way out in a panic, and I also made better judgments."

Ikari directly retorted, "No one understands better than me about facing the Apostles. I will answer your question from this perspective: I didn't fight poorly, so outsiders' opinions are meaningless. I didn't deliberately enter, so outsiders' opinions are meaningless. I am fully capable of continuing the battle, so outsiders' opinions are meaningless! And I have a relatively objective and pertinent suggestion for you: If your understanding ability is not up to par, you can definitely find a few combat personnel from other NERV branches to serve as advisors."

SEELE's classic tombstone-like environment unfolded a series of scolding and insults, which began as soon as Xiao Ikari answered.

"Oh my... Ikari." Fuyutsuki Yukimasu glanced at Old Ikari beside him, a playful smile on his face as he said, "Don't you admit that this kid looks almost exactly like you when you were young?"

"What a fool who shows off too much. There's nothing much to say. He's really a soldier with low IQ." Old Ikari still doesn't think highly of his son.

Shinji Ikari's consultation continues.

Ikari Gendō, who usually gets fed up with being bullied, became NERV's commander with SEELE's support, so there's a certain power dynamic going on. If SEELE had legitimate reasons, they could definitely ask the UN to expel him without a fight.

But Shinji Ikari was different. This beloved son was from the Soviet Union, from China—he stood in the Communist camp and criticized SEELE without giving them any respect. There was an air of "What are you looking at?"

"Alright." Seeing the situation getting a little out of control, Lu Ji saw that Ikari Shinji's words were becoming increasingly rude, with Soviet curse words already being thrown around, and a few words of unintelligible Chinese. Lu Ji immediately took over the topic: "Now I'll ask the question completely - Colonel Ikari Shinji, did you feel the vibration of the soul in the apostle's imaginary space?"

"There was no vibration at all, only endless tenderness." Ikari Shinji nodded, looking quite nostalgic at this moment: "There, it was like returning to my mother's arms... Although this may seem contrary to materialism. But in a sense, the spirit should be a part of the material. I felt that I felt the warmth of a mother in Unit-01, so I felt that there was a vibration of the soul in Unit-01!"

"!?!?"

What the hell did you know?! No way?

"From a materialistic point of view, once something is discovered, it should be truly confronted and investigated. Unit-01 carried me out of the Sea of ​​Imaginary Numbers, not me. I must admit this. What I did was only a tiny part. The scientists, the logistics personnel, and the great workers were the most crucial reason for the victory of this battle..."

Shinji Ikari said it very well.

But no one present cheered.

"In other words," Lu Ji's tombstone No. 1 continued to light up, indicating that he was continuing his questioning. "You mean to say that the victory over the apostles and the emergence from the Sea of ​​Imaginary Numbers were due to Unit-01's own rampage?"

"No, it's not a rampage—it's our cooperation. I asked Unit-01 for help, and Unit-01 responded—with a motherly love. During this process, I begged Unit-01 for help in despair—and then, Unit-01 broke through the Sea of ​​Imaginary Numbers and killed the Angel—are you really not going to conduct research in this area? Ah, I will definitely suggest that the motherland study all of this, and I will also suggest it to the Chinese side..."

"No." The voice was a little confused. Speaker Lu Ji immediately said, "This is confidential and should not be worn casually..."

"My country and China are the five permanent members of the UN Security Council, a great republic." Shinji Ikari's tone was quite contemptuous: "What secrets do you 'should' hide from them?"

"You have to understand that large organizations, especially countries, cannot keep certain secrets. These secrets have not been made public for the time being, not because we don't want to tell them, but because we can't - this is for the sake of all humanity."

"Your organization is even more 'airtight,' right? —This is my freedom. Imprison me if you can. Oh, by the way, I've already informed the embassy in Japan about today's meeting. If you want to imprison me, you'd better find a suitable reason."

"……"grass!

SEELE and Old Ikari suddenly became of the same mind.

No matter what, the pilot of Unit-01 must be replaced!

200 Ikari Yui provides military advice

Someone is out to get him, and Ikari-chan knows it best. Ikari-san is probably already eager to replace himself, and so is Seele.

As the saying goes, it's easy to avoid obvious flirting, but hard to guard against covert sluttiness. In Shinji Ikari's mindset, Old Ikari and SEELE have seen through it all, not lived enough, and won't kill him head-on. Even with the two top three regulars watching closely, they probably won't replace him.

But assassinations are likely to happen quite frequently, and with Ikari Sr. waiting for something to happen to Ikari Jō, NERV's intelligence system probably isn't very promising. Even if I were a scout, I'm unlikely to be able to stop a sniper who can kill an enemy with a single shot from 800 kilometers away, right?

So, three days after his "return", Shinji Ikari went to the embassies of the Soviet Union and China and threw his excellent papers to each other.

Then he called Ritsuko Akagi to come for dinner.

At Katsuragi Misato's house, Ikari Shinji used his salary and the "bonuses" he received from the Soviet Union and China to buy out all the houses around Katsuragi Misato's house. He then filled these houses with various defensive equipment - several unlucky people from SEELE had already died.

"Hey, Ritsuko, you're here." Katsuragi Misato excitedly put her arm around the visitor, Akagi Ritsuko, and then Akagi Ritsuko slapped her away in disgust. But Katsuragi Misato, true to her tireless nature, put her arm around her again.

"What's going on? You've been doing so well lately." Katsuragi Misato looked at her bestie with a smile on her face, then asked a question: "Did you find that gigolo club you're really satisfied with recently?"

"Hmph." Akagi Ritsuko snorted coldly, but her defenses were a little broken. Misato Katsuragi, who looked so carefree, was actually the legendary head of the Operations Division. And while a woman's third sense was already terrifying, this woman was even more terrifying. She often even said that operations were "betting on a woman's intuition." Of course, Akagi Ritsuko was no slouch either, and she immediately pushed the other's pretty face in disgust. "I can't compare to you. You have a—now get out of here, it's Xiaozhen who's here to see me."

"Oh my, don't be like that—Xiao Zhen, Asuka—Ritsuko is here! Out to receive customers." Katsuragi Misato, not knowing whether she was satisfied with the result of the test, happily put her arm around Ritsuko's arm and walked in. The tone of her voice was like that of... the leader of ancient female technical workers.

"...There are minors in here. Can you please be more careful with your words, you old bitch?" Akagi Ritsuko took off her coat and elegantly picked up a lady's cigarette: "Is this how you act as a guardian?"

"Oh my... stop talking. It's a rare gathering—don't you know how I'm the guardian?"

Asuka was walking around the house in her panties and a tight tank top. She grabbed a popsicle from the refrigerator and watched two sexy ladies making dirty jokes. She immediately curled her lips and said, "Dirty adults."

"Hey, Asuka, don't say that - sooner or later, one day, you will get dirty too. How about it, are you happy?" Misato Katsuragi thought to herself that you are at most holding the "baton", and I am the one who gets to drink the first soup!

"Hate it! Go away, it's so dirty! You..." Asuka blushed and decided to ignore the other person.

"Okay, stop it... Who told you to eat a popsicle before dinner?" Ikari Shinji wasn't the type to let a woman go without a reason. In some cases, he really was like a mother. He immediately snatched Asuka's popsicle away, stuffed it back into the bag, and put it in the refrigerator. "Wash your hands, and go eat—I made your favorite today, I guarantee you'll be satisfied."

"You are so annoying! For a man... why does he have to be so good at cooking?" Asuka muttered, and went to wash her hands obediently while muttering.

"...How surprising." Akagi Ritsuko looked at the scene in front of her with some surprise, then lit a cigarette: "I didn't expect that Asuka, who was like that, could be trained so submissively. Haha, Xiaozhen really is...capable?"

Giving Shinji a meaningful look, Akagi Ritsuko was quite amused. "Today, a man as utilitarian as Shinji, it's impossible for him to treat me to a free meal? Tell me, what's the matter that you need to trouble me again?"

"No, no." Ikari Shinji gave Misato Katsuragi a look, then bowed and said, "Please sit down. Please take a seat. The tea is bad, please serve good tea. Sister Ritsuko's presence really brightens up our humble home and enhances the meal. I just have a small problem I'd like to see you through. I recently returned from the Dirac Ocean and gained new insights."

"...I'm sorry, Xiaozhen. I can only provide medical services here. No matter how broken your body is, we are confident that we can save you... Unless you die tragically, then we are confident." Akagi Ritsuko sighed and said, "But I must make it clear - my psychology course in college was an elective. Besides the credits, I only attended a few classes, so I really can't provide you with psychological counseling..."

"Although I'm surprised NERV doesn't have a psychological counseling department, that's not what we're here to discuss today." Shinji Ikari casually joked with Ritsuko Akagi across from him, then poured her a glass of wine. "Come on, these dishes are all Chinese specialties—hot pot! You can't miss them. Let's talk about the future of humanity and the strategy to resist the Angels while we eat."

"Oh... Genghis Khan hotpot? Hmm, that's different. Well, now that we're here." Akagi Ritsuko nodded and said, "I quite like it... but don't eat too much."

About thirty minutes later, the lady gracefully put down the tenth plate of meat and took her first bite. "It tastes good—this kid, Makoto, is truly amazing. How about this, Katsuragi, you go away and let me be his guardian?—Haha, forget it. Asuka's probably going to be upset."

"What did you say!" x2, one big and one small, Misato Katsuragi and Asuka both expressed their dissatisfaction.

"You've accepted the bribe, so you should feel relieved, right?" Akagi Ritsuko looked at Ikari Shinji and said, "You must have something to ask me - if you don't, I can leave now."

"Hey, Sister Ritsuko, I seem to have been indoctrinated with some strange ideas while in the Dirac Sea."

"???! Why didn't you tell me earlier?! - Come on, follow me for the checkup!"

"No, not this kind of mental pollution." Looking at the instantly tense Akagi Ritsuko and the other two lively people, one big and one small, Ikari took out a notebook: "I seem to have received tactical guidance from a senior biologist."

"Hmm?" Senior biologist?

"A gentle motherly voice told me—Look, these are some strange structures. I wrote them down. Do you think they're interesting?"

"What?" Akagi Ritsuko looked at the discussion on the notebook, then immediately stared at it. Then she continued reading -

They stopped eating hotpot and noodles. Shinji Ikari was happily eating with two other little guys, one big and one small.

An hour later, when everyone started watching TV, Akagi Ritsuko grabbed her laptop, shook Ikari's shoulders, and excitedly said, as if she was riding on Ikari for the first time, "Where did you get this thing?!!!"

"I don't know. It seems like when I was in the Dirac Sea, a top biologist was afraid I'd get bored, so he told me a lot about physics, biology, and cutting-edge computer science. After I came out of the Dirac Sea, I knew everything. It's really like just pointing out where I didn't understand something. After I came out, I knew all these data and experimental methods." Xiao Ding spread his hands, expressing his own helplessness. "I don't know why, but... well, anyway, that gentle, motherly female voice doesn't seem to be very good at chatting. She kept talking about biophysics, chemistry, and computer science, which made me dizzy. Now these prosthetics, implanted chips, etc., do you think they're feasible?"

"...It's so mature, so mature! The technology is so mature that it seems like it only needs to be run once before it can be used." Akagi Ritsuko looked at the document in her hand in confusion, muttering to herself: Ikari Yui, is it possible that such terrifying research can be done in the imaginary space? This woman is too strong!

201 Nagisa Kaworu, you plotted against me!

Lately, the Soviet Embassy in Japan has been conducting frequent covert activities. Considering the Cold War's intertwined infiltration, with Britain being completely saturated by the Soviet Union, capitalist countries aren't much better off. The embassy is essentially a spy base for one nation in another, and you can't just send a squadron of armed Japanese cops to arrest them. After all, it's something even his father wouldn't dare to do. District 11, if you're not afraid of death, give it a try.

A lot of surgical equipment and many neurosurgeons were airlifted from the Soviet Union.

On this day, Shinji Ikari came out from inside and happily received the parts of the world's first artificial brain-machine.

Since Shinji Ikari completely distrusted his elder, Akagi was completely helpless—if he couldn't trust anyone, he certainly couldn't trust the Soviet Union either. So, he could only work on his own brain, a process that was undoubtedly arduous. Under mutually beneficial circumstances, the Soviet Union was more likely to try to control him—after all, they'd even been to Afghanistan, so they were all the same.

"Huh." Shinji Ikari lit a cigarette. A 14-year-old smoking always felt a bit decadent. And he was pretending to be old-fashioned—but the young Ikari in his military uniform didn't have that problem. He smiled and said to Maria in front of him, "Thank you very much, Comrade Maria. Without you, this wouldn't be possible."

Shinji Ikari was here today to receive another "honor" for resolving a massive disaster on a human scale. The Soviet Supreme Central Committee was delighted. After much discussion and holding the "confidential documents" given by Ikari, they waved their hands and said—

He also gave Shinji Ikari a Gold Star Medal.

Shinji Ikari became the youngest recipient of the Hero of the Soviet Union title, and the youngest person to be awarded both titles—plus the person with the shortest interval between receiving the title. Two Hero of the Soviet Union medals hung on his left chest, one far more valuable than the other—and Ikari happily took home both titles.

"I want to thank you even more, Comrade Ikari. The motherland and its people will never forget your many great achievements." Maria smiled and nodded to Shinji Ikari. The big car was so fond of the small car. "Well... Actually, I really want to take you back myself."

"No, I have other things to do. Well, this is a good opportunity to buy something for my girlfriend." It was considered a public refusal, and Xiao Ikari played the refusal card with a smile.

"Oh? - I'm so envious of your girlfriend. How about this, let's go check it out together when we have time - call me if you need anything, and I'll come find you too." But, you actually doubted the basic ethics of "Swallow"?! - Maria still smiled.

Ikari saluted and then staggered off the bustling streets of Tokyo-3. His attire, considering his age, looked a bit like cosplay. But he was arguably the most famous teenager in the world, his EVA piloting known throughout the Soviet Union.

The Japanese people don't know much, but some rumors are spreading.

"Don't think the storm has abated, don't think..." Humming a Soviet song, Shinji Ikari walked along the bustling streets of Minato Ward outside the embassy. Honestly, even at the embassy entrance, people were already staring at him—a young cosplayer? But a closer look revealed no such thing. Little Ikari, a bottle of wine in his left hand, an eye in his right, humming a song. Two sips of wine, a few choruses of song, two puffs of cigarette—honestly, this was a bit too Soviet.

Shinji Ikari walked into a nearby jewelry store and put the silver wine flask into his jacket pocket. The air conditioning in the jewelry store was on full blast, and he put out his cigarette and walked into the store.

The store clerks were shocked at the time and still thought he was a cosplay enthusiast.

"Young...young man?" The store manager looked at the handsome boy in front of him and didn't know what to call him. He could only ask with a smile, "Who are you cosplaying..."

"I want to buy some jewelry." Ikari Shinji took out his wallet, which was much richer than Katsuragi's, and shook it, saying, "This isn't cosplay, so you don't have to ask any more questions. Well, if there's nothing wrong with it, I'm not very good at choosing. What should I give to a 30-year-old professional woman?"

"???—This way, please." Money makes the world go round? No, money makes the world go round! The store manager immediately ignored Shinji Ikari's identity—it doesn't matter if you stole it or robbed it, it's mine after you spend it.

Shinji Ikari still has some hobbies of his own, such as the fireproof lock. Now, Shinji Ikari can truly find his own happiness.

Spend money.

Last week, I earned so much money, but ended up not spending it all. It all went to Katsuragi, not to mention he hasn't even enjoyed it yet. Well... but it's normal for a man to provide for her, and for Katsuragi to inherit her estate after she dies. I don't know if the pension was paid out, as all three members of Ikari's family died last week—Katsuragi was their guardian, so I wonder if they'll be wiped out.

"I recommend this one, it reflects..."

"Well, this, this—I want one of each." Ikari Shinji nodded and pointed to three completely different pieces of jewelry: a ring, a necklace, and a bracelet.

"Sir, this is really expensive..."

Shinji Ikari pulled out a Soviet-made phone with a hammer and sickle case on it. "—Does it support [Soviet Payment]?"

“…No, not very supportive.”