Ikari Shinji's Harem Comedy Daily Life

The ancients said: If you want to be unhappy all your life, marry two wives.

What you said is true, but I was not happy in my previous life, so it doesn’t matter.

Just kidding, Ayanami and Asuka, even if they are unhappy for the rest of their lives, they must both be together!

Last week, Asuka lived with Ikari, their relationship close to cohabitation, if not cohabitation. As one older and one younger, Katsuragi and Asuka possess two distinctly different female charms. Of course, there are some similarities. On a more positive note: neither of them is very good at housework.

Let me put it bluntly: they have terrible self-care skills! — And they all love that rotten banana scumbag, Ryoji Kaji.

Ryoji Kaji is the uncle character who has the smallest impact on the protagonist in all the radish (robot) anime. Consider Amuro and Lin Youde's friendship punch. Kaji's only resemblance to the uncle characters in the radish anime is G at the end. Kaji's death is the watershed that turns the entire EVA plot on its head, making him a crucial character.

For Ikari, Kaji is a love rival.

For Asuka, Katsuragi is a love rival. This four-corner relationship is very simple, and at least Kaji has a sane side, sticking to his heart and not making any move against Asuka.

But last week's Ikari Shinji was different. A 14-year-old with an adult's mind, he took Katsuragi's hand in a matter of days thanks to his good looks. Then he started being shameless and even when Asuka started living with him, Ikari was quite unhappy.

Later on, there are no airtight pants in the world.

Katsuragi and Ikari were open and aboveboard at the beginning, but later they became sneaky, and finally Asuka saw everything she shouldn't have seen.

If it weren't for Ikari lying in the toilet vomiting blood for ten minutes the day before yesterday, Asuka would have probably solved the problem with a knife.

Warning Kaworu Nagisa is basically like telling your own children: Don't do drugs, don't commit crimes, don't kill people, don't do paternity tests—or something like that. It's just a scare, a warning. If you actually do it, there's nothing you can do about it.

Warning Katsuragi is a completely different matter.

That's like telling your children: No smoking! No drinking! No perming your hair! No playing games! Study hard! — almost the same thing.

It is a high-probability event that has already happened but is not allowed to happen again.

I had a very happy time in Shanghai.

But he couldn't always be in Shanghai, especially since he'd already lost face enough. He didn't need to do it so completely, did he? He was cross-dressing, he was being lesbian—basically, he'd done everything he hated the most in the previous playthrough. He'd sold all the young, handsome guys.

Really, the young and handsome guys earn their money through hard work.

The difference is that ordinary young men meet middle-aged women, while Xiao Ikari meets Kaworu Nagisa - well, it's all hard-earned money.

"I never thought I could raise a son as a daughter. Ah~ I really regret not buying you girls' clothes when you were little."

Ikari Yui looked like she was still not satisfied. On the plane back to Neon, she let out a sigh that sounded almost like a groan.

"...Mom?" Xiao Ikari was confused. He thought everything was over, but he found out that things at home had just begun.

"Senpai." Makiha Marie Megatron sat down next to Ikari Yui with a grin. In an almost sickeningly sweet voice, he said to his senior, "If you lose a horse, you should lock the stables (a foreign version of mending the fold after the sheep have been lost)—it's not too late now, is it?"

"?!"

"Mom, this is not good for the normal growth of teenagers." Xiao Ding quickly shook his head like a rattle: "You don't want your son to become a mentally ill, a homosexual, or an AIDS carrier in the future, do you?"

"That's true... Although what kind of person you become is your own business, as a mother, I still need to help you to some extent... At the very least, I can't let you become an American." Ikari Yui looked at little Ikari with some concern, then seemed to remember something and said to Asuka apologetically, "Sorry, Asuka, that's not what I meant..."

"It's okay, Auntie." What could Asuka say? Mom was right! "I have triple citizenship: American, German, and Japanese. Germany is where I grew up—America doesn't matter, and I look down on Americans, too."

"Ah..." This...? Ikari Yui didn't know what to say. After an awkward laugh, she said, "We have to thank Sun Sang and the others for arranging this trip to China for us."

"Sun-sang is one of us." Ikari Shinji nodded. After all, the cherry blossoms in Sun-sang's hometown were blooming again. "Didn't Mom sign the contract for me?"

As an adult, Shinji Ikari wouldn't normally enter into a body indenture. Especially not something like this, which couldn't possibly be handled by parents. What if he were 14 and his parents were controlling him? And if he gave all the money to them, wouldn't that be like the unscrupulous parents in "Home Alone"?

--but!

Yui Ikari is different.

This was a great mother to whom Ikari could trust his life and property. In a sense, he had already entrusted his life and property to her in the previous round. After hiring a professional legal advisor to review the agreement and confirming that it was all clear, Ikari asked Yui to sign on his behalf - after all, he was still a minor.

"After returning to Japan, don't fall behind in your studies."

"Uh...ok."

"Rei too—you have to supervise Shinji well."

"Yes." Ayanami is gentle and virtuous, and has the potential to be a first wife.

A beautiful woman is rare, but a group of handsome men and beautiful women will certainly attract attention.

"Yes, Shinji-kun." Sitting next to Xiao Ikari was the smiling Nagisa Kaworu: "A student's duty is to study. Although it would be very happy to meet you during the live broadcast, it is still better to study hard."

"...I'm quite puzzled. With so many people, why were we separated into two sides?" Xiao Ding was very surprised. The plane they took today was not big. An international flight with five seats in a row was considered a small plane.

"Maybe it's because... this is my private plane~" Nagisa Xun smiled and gestured: "My service staff just told me that it will take off soon--"

We're taking off. Please hold on tight. Next stop: Narita International Airport.

"Tsk, rich second generation." Asuka was of course very uncomfortable. It was not like she was broke, so she could just pay for the plane ticket herself! Why did she have to fly with this damn gay guy?

But Xiao Ding adhered to the principle of saving as much as possible - he fully demonstrated the spirit of not spending money if he could sell meat.

"Alas, how long can my bright and fresh beauty last? Look at my face, and then look at my father's portrait. I won't have many days of good days left. In this world where looks matter, Nagisa Kaworu will abandon me and find a new handsome guy. How long do you think gays can be passionate? Don't worry." This is what Xiao Ikari said to comfort the other party, but in fact, even as an adult, Xiao Ikari has a face that is very suitable for being the male protagonist of a gay animation.

Neon is back!

Summer vacation - three days left.

"There are still three days of summer vacation left." Xiao Ikari sighed and said, "I don't know what to do."

"How about we take a look at the differences between Shanghai Disneyland and Tokyo Disneyland?" Asuka suddenly became a show-off.

"No, I don't know whether to go to see the project or to see the people." Xiao Ding immediately shook his head.

"Reading at home is not bad either—Ikari-kun, would you like to join us?"

"Uh... we can do this any other time. Isn't this a waste of time in this episode?"

"That……"

"Oh right." Ikari Yui suddenly remembered something: "Speaking of studying hard—Rei, Asuka, Shinji… have you three finished your summer homework?"

Koikari&Ayanami&Asuka: "..."

Chapter 77 Take Me With You

Asuka was responsible for doing the questions, while Ikari and Ayanami were responsible for translating Japanese into English that the other party could understand.

Are you kidding? Asuka is a postdoctoral fellow in high-energy physics. Dealing with these junior high school summer homework assignments in District 11 is like using a mortar to kill a mosquito - making a mountain out of a molehill.

As mentioned in the original version, Asuka, a 14-year-old girl who "only" had a college degree, was good at math - but unfortunately she couldn't read written Japanese, so there was nothing she could do if she made mistakes.

"Was? Bist du behindert?" Huh? Are you guys retarded? — Asuka looked at Shinji and Ayanami in front of her with a confused look on her face: "You still want me to help you write this? This thing is like giving a dog a pen, can't a dog do it?"

Ikari Shinji was furious, but now he had to bow his head under the eaves. He was mainly worried that Ayanami would explode next to him.

But Ayanami didn't say a word, she just took a pen and wrote something down.

Little Ikari let out a long sigh, then hurried over to lick it: "Please help me, the invincible Asuka-sama - if you do it quickly, we will help you translate it, and if you write it out, we will quickly copy it - if you hurry up, maybe we can go play on the last day."

Ayanami took out her cell phone and didn't know what she was doing.

"Hmm, hmm~" It feels good after being praised.

"Swish!" Suddenly, Ayanami stood up. She gave Ikari Shinji and Asuka a contemptuous smile, then said in a pitying tone, "Well, take your time writing. I'm going to go out for a while."

"? Ayanami, aren't you going to do your summer homework?" This is... this is not a big deal.

Come to think of it, Ikari stopped doing holiday homework in the first week of the game, starting in sixth grade. In junior high, he never did a single one. And in high school…did high school have summer vacations? Oh, it seems, but summer homework became just a test. It didn't matter if I wanted to do it or not, because there was always a group of students in the class who were destined to be abandoned.

"Who said we won't do it?——" Ayanami glanced at Asuka calmly, then revealed a second contemptuous smile: "It's just that I found a new OEM."

"? New OEM?"

"Misato-san." Ayanami waved the phone in her hand and said, "She'll probably be here in three... no, maybe a minute. But Ikari-kun might be in pain for a while."

"?!"

"I lent her Ikari-kun for an hour to play with her—and she agreed to help me with my homework. Ah, if you think about it, she wouldn't do anything too outrageous, would she? Ikari-kun should be very happy too, right?"

"I..." I don't object, but I'm afraid of Katsuragi...

"Shinji~~~!!! So heartless, so heartless! You are so heartless!!!"

As expected, Katsuragi came running in crying, without any airs of an older sister at all... at least she never had that before.

It's really rare to see a queen with a face full of resentment, crying and throwing herself into the arms of a beautiful boy. If you look closely, that posture is really a bit...

Don't cry, my beloved. Tears don't belong with you. Let's go, just move forward. I've made up my mind to stride forward like this—ah, even though the smile is gone from my heart. (From "Winter Flower")

It would be even more suitable if it were paired with Katsuragi's car.

"Ahem... Misato... Sister?" Ikari looked at Katsuragi who was running over with some surprise. What does this mean?

"What 'Misato-san'? You don't even take me seriously? Everyone, everyone went to China and left me alone!"

That's true.

Actually, it's not just you.

"Ah? This..." Xiao Ikari took out a handkerchief and quickly wiped Katsuragi's tears... and snot.

Wow, looking at it this way, is this really crying?

"Misato-sister, what you said is really irresponsible - it's you who are going to the Arctic for an expedition during your college summer vacation." Ayanami stabbed her without hesitation.

I let you live together and make out all last week, and left me to live in a cold, dilapidated apartment for the rest of my life! You deserve it! — Instantly, the knife was unsheathed, piercing Katsuragi's heart without hesitation: "You're going to the Arctic Circle, so we can't travel to China? Besides, Ikari-kun went to help with the family expenses. Do I have to inform you? Ah, come to think of it, you never invite us when you travel abroad every year, do you?"

"Wu... Wu... Wu... Wu... Wu..." Critical hit, critical hit. Katsuragi was at his wit's end. Even though he was a college student, he just lay in Ikari's arms and refused to come out: "Shinji, talk to Rei! - She, she bullied me!"

The emperor usually does not interfere with the management of the harem by the queen mother. The man is in charge of the outside affairs and the woman is in charge of the inside affairs. But... tell me...

"Tsk... Misato is already so grown up." Looking at her two-generation rivals, Asuka immediately exploded: "Stop acting like a child, okay? - And, what you're doing is pure sexual harassment! In America, you'd have emptied your magazine long ago!"

"..."

Ayanami frowned.

To be honest, she and Katsuragi had that kind of... knock-knock kind of relationship.

She didn't quite understand why Asuka wanted to kill Katsuragi the moment she saw him.

So she gently walked to Asuka's side and pulled Asuka's hand - Asuka resisted for a moment, but then gave in. Walking aside, Ayanami asked, not quite understanding -

That look was enough. What's going on? Are you trying to kill Katsuragi? Did she provoke you?

"...Oh, right, top student, don't you know? - Ha, you in the 'dream' were idle for a long time last week, hahahaha... Mutterficker!" Asuka suddenly cursed and glanced at Katsuragi who was afraid to stay in Shinji Ikari's arms: "Come here! I'll tell you something! - This female vixen looks carefree, but in fact..."

“Hmm…Hmm?…Hmm?!?!”

It shocked Ayanami for ten thousand years.

My brother's first time was...

"!!!" Ayanami subconsciously planned to go over for the PK, but she turned around and took a step before stopping.

"Soru-kun, come here."

"...Huh?" Asuka, who was being dragged around, wanted to say "Who do you think you are?", but looking at Ayanami's expression... "What..."

"Ikari-kun?"

Ayanami knelt beside Koidaki. Her boneless hands were now as strong as a thousand pounds. She pulled Katsuragi out of Koidaki's arms like a kitten, grabbing his collar from behind without mercy.

“Eh?!?!——”

Ayanami took out a handkerchief and wiped it on Ikari's face, which was completely dust-free - the beautiful boy had no idea what was happening.

"Yeah." Ayanami nodded in satisfaction, looked at Katsuragi beside her, and said, "Oh, by the way, Sister Misato - the long-standing war can finally come to an end."

"? What? ...Huh!?"

Then Katsuragi saw... the end of the war.

Ah, I've been in Shanghai for so long. Not much progress, but it's like watching the first chapter preview 10,000 times before the game even releases.

Ayanami kissed Shinji on the lips, smoothly and seamlessly, and he was a hero in the eyes of many people!

"Soru-kun... Soru-kun!! Come here!"

It's time to use you, how could you be so lame? — Seeing Asuka seemed a little embarrassed in front of an outsider. Ayanami didn't explain much. She was a simple and straightforward person and felt that Asuka was an exception.

Hold Asuka's head and slam it hard into Ikari's face! -- This isn't an idol drama, where a mouth-to-mouth fall is fine. The reality is that anyone who falls mouth-to-mouth needs to go to the dentist to get a filling or implant.

Asuka kissed Ikari on the cheek, and both of them felt very painful. However, Ayanami continued to say: "Ah, you see? This is the relationship between the three of us now."

"You, you, you! - Li, this is not good. You are already brother and sister, and then there is another... three of you... This is not right!" Speaking from an adult's perspective, I have to criticize you!

"There's nothing wrong with it. This is the choice of the three of us. Ah, all you have in your mind now is [slutty high school girl], right? - Whatever you think, this is our choice for eternity." What I want to tell you clearly is: this belongs to the three of us, there is no place for you.