I am the emotional sustenance of your deceased

In my fantasy, the green light outside the operating room turned into a red light, and finally even the red light went out.

Li Xi waited for the doctor with golden pupils. She passed by in a hurry, left only a word and left.

"I'm sorry, I failed, but you can still see her one last time. Go quickly."

"What? What did you say? You said..."

"Feel sorry."

Huh? What did she say?

Chitose, her operation failed?

"..."

Shiina Riki walked towards the operating room, but after a few steps, he could no longer move his legs.

As expected...what Chitose said to her before, those were his last words.

"You idiot, why do you always say..."

So accurate?

Why do you even know that something bad will happen to me... Why do you know everything... Why?

Li Xi turned around in silence.

Should I go see Chitose Noshiro for the last time? No... Riki can't do it. Shiina Riki really can't do it.

Why would the doctor say such cruel words...

Let a person who has just become less lonely meet the person who made her less lonely for the last time...

It’s fake, absolutely fake!

Nothing will happen to her as long as Chitose is safe!

In a daze, Shiina Riki did not choose to go to the operating room.

She looked back at the operating room nervously, then ran along the corridor and escaped from the hospital.

Ch64. Nine years after Noshiro Chitose's death

"It's been nine years since that happened."

Very suddenly, it was all over.

"But I don't feel like my heart has been untied."

"I became an instant star when I was still in junior high school. The song 'Dancing Ko' that Chitose and I created was a huge hit, and that was also the last song I would ever sing."

"Boring junior high, boring high school, boring college, and finally, a boring job... The job I found was very boring, quality-checking stones at a stone company. My colleague was an older alcoholic woman. I heard she lost someone very important to me."

"Thinking about everything about Noshiro Chitose now, it's truly incredible... Noshiro Chitose's life seemed like such a mess. Her arrival was so abrupt, and her departure was even more abrupt than her arrival."

Do you think the story ends here?

I said, it's not over yet.

My name is Shiina Riki, I'm 25 years old, but I haven't been as happy as I was in junior high school for a long time. The above is my life... It's a complete failure.

……

For the past nine years, Shiina Tatsuki has listened to the audio of their songs every day.

I don't know why, I just want to listen.

I listened from late at night until the next morning and couldn't sleep at all.

Has Chitose ever considered that even if her ashes were scattered at sea, the songs she left behind would still bring her listeners back to grief time and again?

She must have thought about it.

But she didn't expect that she would die so early.

Lixi is now renting a house downstairs from Chitose's former home. She just resigned a few weeks ago and is now short of money, so she goes to help out in some bands.

There are still people who often recognize the talented girl Shiina Riki who became famous overnight and disappeared overnight, but more people just think that Riki looks familiar.

"Another all-nighter."

I can’t sleep at all, especially living in a place like this... Every day I see the street scenes that I used to see from Chitose’s window, and memories come flooding back again and again.

"Has Chitose ever thought about dying at sixteen? If so, why would she come to me at the end of her life..."

Chitose's house, the house that carried countless memories of Shiina Riki, had been sold long ago, but it is still vacant now.

Li Xi asked about it and was told that it was sold during Qiansui's lifetime.

The specific time was almost right before their performance at the music festival, which was the day before Lixi became famous overnight.

That day... Chitose Noshiro asked her to go to the movies.

That should have been the last movie they watched, but I broke the appointment.

"Xiao Sui must have had a lot to tell me that night."

Lixi smokes, Lixi drinks, and Lixi takes antidepressants.

Lixi felt very uncomfortable and didn't know what to do to make himself feel better.

Everyone told her that time would heal everything.

However, everyone underestimates the impact of regret on people, which is endless.

She and she had watched the sea together and spent countless nights hugging each other...

They discussed the future and their lives, but in the end they didn't even have time to say goodbye properly. The last goodbye was just an exchange of glances, and from then on they were separated by life and death.

Time seems to be moving, yet it seems to be unchanged.

When he sees Chitose's photo again, Riki can't help thinking about it... It seems that he recalls one time in the middle of the night when Chitose Noshiro nervously said to Riki Shiina, "I'm so scared that I don't want to be alone. Can you please not leave me?"

This is great, fortunately I can go on behalf of Chitose.

"I'm the only one who can't get out of this situation."

The TV was making a noisy sound, but Li Xi didn't even watch it.

Turning on the TV but not watching it is what Lixi does every day. He feels uncomfortable not turning on the TV, and he also feels uncomfortable watching TV, so doing this is the only way to achieve a delicate balance.

"Today marks the ninth anniversary of Chitose's death."

She has basically cut off contact with her family... It was Shiina Riki who took the initiative to distance herself from them. She was afraid that one day she would become too depressed and end her life, making her parents sad.

Which day is it that I can't get over? Yes, it's today.

Today she listened to the music they created all night long. The melody was familiar, and she could even hear Chitose Noshiro humming softly.

These tiny sounds are what Lixi wants to recall again and again.

"What would have happened if I hadn't escaped from the hospital that day?" Lixi fell on the bed, too weak to get up.

It was only later that she realized that her success was entirely dependent on Chitose Noshiro.

Chitose spent a fortune on those streams. She probably sold her house just for this.

The most important melody of this song was also written by Chitose. In the face of such an excellent melody, the lyrics are not even that important.

"But why would you spend the last year of your life helping me? Helping a ridiculous little girl who wants to surpass her sister?"

Why is it?

Why would you do this...

Give up everything you have, including your health, time, and wealth, to help a poor person you have never met before grow up?

Why on earth...why are you so nice to me?

Could it be that you just want to give me everything so that I can reach the peak of happiness and then destroy everything I have to make me fall to the bottom?

"No...Xiao Sui is not that kind of person...Xiao Sui..."

What did that girl look like? I forgot, it was vague, Li Xi couldn't remember clearly.

No, it’s not that I forgot, I just didn’t dare to think about it. Li Xi was afraid that I would burst into tears.

"But the tears, why are they still falling?"

I cried again on my bed, soaking half of the sheets...the traces of tears left last time had not yet disappeared.

"That girl, did she simply want the last period of her life to be meaningful? Did she simply want me... to go further on her behalf and help more frustrated people?"

But that girl was wrong... She underestimated her own [importance] and didn't consider how cruel it would be for a friendless girl to lose the most important friend in her life.

Lixi struggled to sit up, her hair was disheveled but she didn't care at all.

She stood up, took one last sip of her drink, and walked out of the room with the prepared cephalosporin.

She was going upstairs to end all the pain.

"I spent a lot of effort to get this key... It would be a shame if I didn't die this time."

Sorry, Xiaosui, I disappoint you.

To this day I still resent myself for escaping from the hospital.

After that, the only way I could see you was to look at your portrait...even though you gave me one last chance to see you.

Corridor, staircase, reaching upstairs.

Li Xi approached Chitose's door, but heard the faint sound of music coming from inside the house.

"This is?!"

There is no mistake...

She'd heard it countless times...it couldn't be wrong.

This is "Dancing Girl".

Ch65. I fell in love with you at first sight and never regretted it

The lights in the house were gone, and Lixi pulled out the key with trembling hands.

Her pupils lost their ability to focus and she stared blankly into the house.

"Little bastard, you're a lot older now than you were back then."

In the dark living room, only the TV was on, playing the video of Li Xi's rehearsal over and over again.

The light from the TV illuminated the face of the girl on the sofa.

"You are…"

"How could you possibly be so haggard and worn out like this? It's a good thing I didn't have time to grow up."

Chitose Noshiro slowly turned her head, a golden light flashed across her eyes, and then Lixi saw the rose-red color that was engraved in her bones.

"Chitose? Ah...it must be the chemical reaction between the antidepressants and the alcohol that's causing me to hallucinate, haha."

Shiina Riki tried to slap himself twice to wake himself up, but unfortunately it had little effect.

Noshiro Chitose, who looked to be about fifteen or sixteen years old, was still wearing the clothes of the central part of Hanedaoka Province and was sitting there looking at her.

The lights were dim, but Shiina Riki was even more dim.

"No... No... Why..."

"Xiao Lixi, did you bring the pineapple I wanted to eat? Or are you still that idiot who can only peel apples for others?"

"Xiao Sui...is that you? Are you Chitose Noshiro?" The cephalexin in his hand fell and finally scattered a little, but Shiina Riki didn't care.

"Ah, it's me, it's me, I'm Chitose Noshiro."

Chitose waved his hand nonchalantly, but his eyes remained on the TV the entire time.

"I didn't expect that even after so many years, I still wouldn't get tired of watching the videos from back then... But don't you feel like something's missing?"

"what?"

"Lixi, why is the confidence you found back then gone now?"

"I…"