Loneliness and Rock and Roll with Band Observer

"Ah, yeah. Come to think of it, I think it's about time I change trains..."

Qiu Hui stood up from the chair, trying to keep her footing while suppressing the sudden inexplicable dizziness.

She turned around and waved to Su Shi.

"Then I'll be leaving first. Bye."

"Yeah, see you next time."

Looking at Qiu Hui's departing back, Su Shi smiled meaningfully.

Chapter 46: Li Xi Staring at the Light

not long ago.

After getting off the tram, Deng and Li Xi walked side by side.

Deng turned his head and looked at Li Xi's graceful profile.

Lixi's home doesn't seem to be in this direction at all, she suddenly thought.

Although he always takes me home, it’s actually not on his way.

Why do you have to take a long detour just for me?

Confused about this, Deng followed Li Xi up the stairs of the pedestrian bridge. As long as they walked across the bridge, they would reach Deng's home.

Walking up to the lights on the overpass, I subconsciously observed the traffic under the bridge. The night covered the outlines of the vehicles, and only the lights were clearly visible.

Where do these spots of light that come and go come from and where do they go?

Deng slowly stopped, turned around, held the railing, and looked down.

"lamp?"

Realizing that the light had stopped, Lixi also stopped and walked to the side of the light.

"Lixi..."

The lights watched the passing traffic.

“…What should I do?”

Li Xi was stunned when he heard what Deng said.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"It's about the band." Deng replied.

"…I'm sorry." Li Xi suddenly apologized subconsciously, "Was I a little too impatient just now, so I made Deng feel stressed?"

She was referring to an earlier incident when she asked Deng if she wanted to host a show.

Deng shook his head: "Lixi did nothing wrong."

"But, Deng is now troubled by that problem..." Li Xi started to make a counter-argument for some reason, trying to prove that he was the one who made the mistake.

"Even so, it's not Riki's fault."

The wind blowing through the tall buildings on both sides of the road blew up the tips of the lamps.

"Su Shi said that the disbandment of CRYCHIC was not anyone's fault. But even if no one was at fault, the band still disbanded in the end. So..."

Deng shook his head somewhat melancholy.

"...Perhaps, it's not enough to just be 'not wrong'. You have to do the 'right' thing."

Deng Weiwei tightened his grip on the guardrail.

"But, for us now, what is the 'right' thing to do..."

Deng wants to know the answer to this question.

However, at this moment, Li Xi unexpectedly said loudly: "It's okay, Deng doesn't need to worry about this kind of thing!"

Deng turned his head in surprise and looked at Li Xi who suddenly became determined.

"All you have to do is keep singing. As for the rest, I... we will take care of it!"

With his cheeks slightly red, Li Xi expressed his opinion in a decisive and resolute manner.

"But, why......"

"Because I like the song of the lamp!"

"what?"

"The lyrics written by Deng and the singing of Deng, I feel that it is just like... it is like they are expressing my feelings and words that are difficult to express on my behalf!"

Li Xi clenched his fists and his face flushed, as if he wanted to seize this opportunity to get out everything that he had been unable to say all along.

“I hope that Deng can sing like that again… so I’m really happy to be in a band with Deng again!”

"I...so, Deng just needs to...keep singing...I...I will..."

The courage she had finally mustered seemed to be almost exhausted at this point.

"I'll try my best to help with the band's affairs! So, it's okay if you don't push yourself too hard... Bye!"

...ran away.

Deng silently watched Lixi's back as he jogged away.

why?

I'm not that good at singing.

Why would Lixi...

Deng lowered his head and felt a deep sense of powerlessness.

Just as Su Shi said, it seems that everyone's thoughts cannot be conveyed to each other at all.

I don't even know what Lixi is thinking.

If this continues, will it be like before...

……

Ran away.

I am really outrageous.

After running for quite a long distance, Lixi supported his knees and breathed slightly.

How did the lantern party understand what I just said? After saying such strange things, I ran away without permission. Isn't it too strange for me to do such a thing?

He said he wanted to help turn on the light...

...But in fact, it might have caused her unnecessary trouble.

Trying to calm his breathing which had become disordered due to running, Li Xi smiled self-deprecatingly.

The die is cast, there is no point in thinking about it any further.

Even if Deng can't understand... I still have things I should do.

Lixi felt that he seemed to understand the lamp's thoughts a little bit.

Although she has re-formed the band, the wound left by that incident must still be buried deep in her heart and may break out again at any time.

Now, she definitely doesn't want to be separated from the band members again...

...And, this "everyone" may not be limited to me and Su Shi, but may include... that guy, and even Togawa-senpai.

As for stray cats...

Thinking of this, Li Xi felt tormented by his inner conflict.

I want a band that can match the singing voice of Deng. For this, the guitar level of Stray Cat may be necessary.

However, Deng would not be happy if she became depressed because of hurting that girl due to the stray cat incident.

What should I do?

Thinking of this, Li Xi took out his cell phone and dialed Deng's number.

“Hey, Deng… I’m sorry I ran away just now. I guess I made you feel troubled… Um, I have a question for you, but I forgot to ask it just now…”

Li Xi took a deep breath.

"...Tomo. What do you think, if the stray cat... that kid named Lenai who plays guitar really well, were to join the band..."

……

"…Are you going to agree?"

Faced with the questions raised by Lixi on the other end of the phone, Deng fell silent.

I do not know.

I originally wanted to answer like this.

Because, if you say nothing, perhaps you won't make mistakes.

but……

…Just saying “it’s not wrong” is not enough.

You have to do the "right" thing.

"It's okay." Li Xi comforted, "If you feel confused, it's okay not to rush to answer. I can wait, or wait a few days..."

"...Lixi, please wait a moment, just wait a moment." Deng said like this.

If you don't even give an answer, then there is no question of whether it is right or wrong.

Therefore, I must answer first. Deng was troubled by this.

If she hadn't accepted Ryunae-chan into the band, Aine might not have felt depressed because of the difference in level.

but……

...Is that really a good idea?

At this time, Deng remembered something.

At that time, she and Aine were standing together in front of the stage where the band was ending.

The way Aine was looking at the stage at that time made her seem to realize something.

Although it is very vague and cannot be described clearly, but...

Senior Ichichi said.

If you don't know what to do, trust your instinct.

At that time, Aine’s eyes that yearned for the stage made Deng make a judgment based on her intuition.

“…I accept.”

She answered Lixi's question.

"If Rina-chan joins..."

The lamp raised its head and looked at the city in the distance.

"...Perhaps, I can feel like I have taken a step forward."

Although still confused.

But even so, the thought that he must try to do something made Deng's eyes become slightly firmer.

Chapter 47: Qiu Hui's inner struggle

"Togawa-senpai, there are some things about Rakuna and the band's future arrangements. If it's not convenient now, I would like to find a time to talk."