Wanqingsi

Chapter 173
The rain on the Tianjie Street is as crisp as the grass, but the grass color is far away but not close.

The most important thing is the one-year spring benefits.

——"Early Spring Shows the Eighteen Members of the Ministry of Water" Han Yu

The snow on Yuxue Mountain has not yet melted, but the foot of the mountain has already been covered with hazy clouds.I lifted the curtains of the carriage and looked at the scenery outside the window. The cool wind and rain beat on my face from the window, and I was dazed.I haven't gone down the mountain for a year, and the capital is as prosperous as before. It doesn't look like a human state of mind, and it doesn't become desolate and desolate because of the disappearance of any person.

"Mother..." Nuo'er in my arms called me softly, I put down the curtains, lowered my head, kissed his pink cheeks, and smiled at him.My Nuo'er turned one year old today, and the old man held a Zhou Catch Ceremony for him at the Hou's Mansion.Men in Tianzhao Kingdom have three important ceremonies in their lives, the full moon banquet, the one-year-old catch week, and the 16-year-old coming-of-age ceremony.I missed Nuoer's full moon banquet, but I can't miss it again when I catch Zhou Li, even if I am still in mourning, even if I don't want to leave Yuxue Mountain and Yunzheng again.

I followed Yun Zheng's wish and buried him on Jade Snow Mountain, in Aoxue Mountain Villa.For a long time, I felt that everything that happened on Yuxue Mountain was a dream. When I woke up, it was just like he woke me up from the nightmare before. A gentle and comforting look.However, Nuo'er is true, Ming Yan is true, and Yun Zheng will no longer be by my side, it is also true.

I don't remember at all how I lived the first days after Yunzheng left. I only remember that on the day of the burial, many people came up the mountain, many familiar or unfamiliar faces, but I couldn't tell who they were. Talk to me, and I can't hear what they're saying.I just looked at my Yun Zheng, looked at his pale face and closed eyes, the pain in my heart was spreading, I knew that no matter how painful and desperate I was, these eyes would never open again, looking at me tenderly up.

Yun Zheng was lying peacefully in the coffin, many people were crying, but I couldn't shed any tears, my tears had already dried up.Yun Zheng, I promised you that I will live a good life.But you are not here, who can cure my heartache?The coffin lid slowly closed on the coffin, Yun Zheng's face was gradually blocked by the coffin lid and disappeared from my sight. I suddenly realized that after this moment, the world loves me the most, loves me the most, and treats me the most. Good man, I will never see him again.I rushed forward crazily, pressed against the coffin lid, and I shouted in panic: "Yunzheng, Yunzheng, get up, get up..." I thought I could be strong and keep my promise to you, but I can't do it, I can't pretend to be strong, I can't control my heartache.Yun Zheng, how could you bear to leave me, how could you leave me...

The pain in my heart was expanding and expanding, and the boundless pain seemed to swallow me up.I thought I wouldn't cry anymore, but hot and humid liquid flowed down my cheeks from the corner of my eyes, and the sky and the earth were instantly red.Someone came to pull me, someone was screaming, I just threw myself on Yunzheng's coffin, calling my dear Yunzheng loudly.Suddenly, someone hit the back of my head hard, the blood red in front of my eyes turned black, and my consciousness gradually drifted away. I heard someone calling, "Ye girl", "Young lady", "Sister-in-law", "Sister", "Huahua", I don't care who "Ms. Ronghua" or even "Xue'er" is... because there is no more "Ye'er" that I am willing to wake up for.

Yunzheng, I want to find you, whether in heaven or hell, don't be angry with me, let me be self-willed this time, Nuo'er has a grandfather and uncle, and they will take good care of him.Yun Zheng, take me away, no matter where you go, whether it turns into wind or cloud, please take me away...

However, people have the shackles of the body, and they cannot fly where the soul wants to go.How much you don't want to go, but your body is helplessly weakened, how much I want to find you, but my soul can't break away from this body that is gradually recovering.Gradually, I could feel that someone was checking my pulse, and someone was giving me medicine, but I didn't want to try to open my eyes like when you were by my side during the postpartum hemorrhage.I want to be more silent in the darkness, and I want to find your light in the darkness.

Until I felt a warm little body lying on top of me and started crying.

My heart suddenly twitched, my Nuoer...

I opened my eyes and looked at Nuoer, who I had only seen once since birth.He lay on my chest, looked at me curiously, and stopped crying.There was a reddish layer in front of his eyes, and his heart twitched with joy and pain. He and Yunzheng were too much alike. Although Nuoer was still so small, the outline of the face, the clear eyebrows, the clear eyes, and the focused demeanor , almost exactly the same as Yun Zheng.

I hugged him and never let go.Yun Zheng, you insist on not taking me away because you know that Nuo'er will be my salvation, right?
I miss you every night when people are quiet, reviewing the days and nights with you, every minute and every second, and only after I no longer feel the pain that pierces my heart, I start to thank God instead of resenting God , I finally understand that God treats me well, he can't give a person too much happiness.

In the last life, I have seen so many couples who turned against each other, or parted ways, or had different dreams in the same bed, or were just partners in life, pots and pans, stumbling, quarreling, how many people really love each other Keep it for a lifetime.In this life, most men with a little money and power have three wives and four concubines.If I want to compete with a bunch of women for a man who doesn't belong to me completely, I can't do it; I can't bear to have a deep affection for me today and have sex with other wives and concubines tomorrow.And Yun Zheng, his heart, such a flawless and priceless heart, actually belongs to me completely, how fortunate, I am his first love and only one.

From the exchange of hearts in tears, to the understanding and tolerance of being honest about life experience, in the face of the courts and rivers and lakes, we join hands, he shelters me from the wind and rain, even if it is a wish that I did not say, he will do his best Help me make it happen.When I was in a coma, he forgot to take care of me and was willing to live and die with me; but when he left, he only wanted me to live a good life.Except for his illness, he never made me angry or sad. Even in his illness, he was always afraid that I would worry, and endured the pain alone, unwilling for me to take risks for him.

I, Ye Haihua, an ordinary woman, once had a husband like this, so what more can I ask for.

All the way with him, there is only beauty and no regrets.Maybe it's luck, if I didn't have Mingyan's black dragon jade, and all the experiences that made me come to Cangdu, I wouldn't have met him; maybe it was luck, if I could have met him earlier, he would have healed the gu earlier, Or would my life be different if I didn't bleed heavily after giving birth?Unfortunately, there are no ifs in life, and there are no answers to my questions.

But I know that I am not alone, I will never be alone, he is in my heart, as elegant as when I first met, as real as when I was lingering, as fresh as when we met each other, as if I stretched out my hand, I You can touch his handsome and gentle face, and hold his cool and long fingers.No need to worry about his illness anymore, I gently told him about the people and things I met every day, and told him about Nuoer's growth bit by bit.Thinking of the day and night with him, his sincere promises and beautiful lies with me in the wind, the jokes and jokes with him, his tenderness and love for me, I often fall asleep with a smile in my mouth, but wake up, I don’t know When, tears wet the pillow towel.

"Sister, the Hou Mansion is here." Seeing me holding Nuo'er in a daze, Xiaohong called me softly, and I came back to my senses.Xiaohong was received by the old man in the capital, probably because I was afraid that I would be overwhelmed after Yunzheng left, and wanted to be accompanied by someone I knew well. In fact, I have to admit that the old man treated me fairly well, and it was not because I lost The value of using it despises me.Nuoer's nanny Hui Niang stretched out her hand, trying to hug Nuoer from my arms.Nuo'er hooked my neck tightly and yelled softly, "Mother, hug me, mother..."

It’s not long since Nuo’er started talking, and now she can only speak a few single words. I remember the first time I heard him call out “mother”, I couldn’t stop crying, which caused me to be nagged by Xiaohong. For a long time.I patted Nuo'er on the back soothingly, and said to Hui Niang, "It's okay, I'll hug him."

"But Young Madam's eyes..." Hui Niang looked at me worriedly, but hesitated to speak.I smiled: "I'm holding Nuo'er, you just hold my arm, it's not like I can't see at all."

My eyes, on the day of Yun Zheng's burial, shed tears of blood.After waking up, there was always a hazy layer of red in his eyes, and everything he saw was red.My eyesight gradually became poor, Xiaohong and the others were very close to me, so I could see their appearance clearly.Now Mr. Fu has become my doctor again, treating my eyes, but he can only control my eyesight from getting worse.

After getting out of the car, Yun Yi came up to meet him: "Thank you, Young Madam."

I smiled, and under the leadership of Xiaohong and Hui Niang, I carefully stepped up the steps and walked in.The Hou Mansion must have invited a lot of guests today, but I really couldn't see clearly, so I had to maintain a proper smile, and use my voice to nod to those who salute me, so as not to be rude.Before he reached the atrium, Grandpa greeted him with a slightly excited voice: "Ye girl..."

I smiled: "Grandpa..." I lowered my head and whispered to Nuoer in my arms, "Nuoer, call me Grandpa!"

Nuo'er pursed her lips, opened her mouth but did not make a sound, raised her eyes to see the old man's expectant face, and continued to urge him softly, Nuo'er opened her mouth, and after a while, she uttered two ambiguous single voices: "Too, Grandpa... ..."

The old man's tears rolled out all at once.I feel a little guilty, the old man is getting old, and he definitely wants to get closer to Nuoer, but I don't want to live in Hou's mansion, I am only willing to stay on Yuxue Mountain. My son stayed in Houfu, and I have always been grateful to him in my heart.I lowered my head, looked at Nuo'er, and said softly, "Nuo'er, let my grandfather hug you, be good..."

Nuo'er struggled a little, and hugged my neck reluctantly, I coaxed him softly: "Hey, Grandpa loves Nuo'er the most, let Grandpa Zeng hug..." Nuo'er didn't move, obediently let me put him Handing it to the old man, the old man hugged him helplessly, tears came out again.

"Grandpa, go in, the ceremony is ready." An Yuanxi's voice sounded beside the old man.I looked up at him, his face blurred in my eyes. "Sister-in-law!" There was no ups and downs in his voice, and he still had no expression on his face, but no matter what his expression is now, I can't see it now. "Uncle." I nodded, smiled, and handed my hand to Xiaohong.The old man looked at me and said softly, "Girl, are your eyes better?"

"It's good, it hasn't continued to deteriorate." I smiled, not wanting to talk about my eyes, "Grandpa, go in."

The people of Tianzhao country attach great importance to the Zhou ceremony, and the child's first birthday means that he has passed the first spring, summer, autumn and winter in his life safely, so he should celebrate it, not to mention the rich family like the Yun family, and Nuo'er is a bereaved father. His premature baby, who is safe and healthy to celebrate his first birthday, is of extraordinary significance to the Yun family.

Nuo'er put on new clothes that he had prepared long ago, and tied a tasseled ornament symbolizing longevity around his waist. I couldn't see the color of his clothes clearly, but my eyes were still red, and I could still feel his new clothes. The color should be very bright, embroidered with pictures of peony and blessings and longevity.I made offerings to the gods, and I prayed to the gods, that my Nuo'er can grow up safely and healthily, and have a smooth life without any surprises or dangers.

A table of Zhou's objects was placed: the four treasures of the study, swords, bows and arrows, official hats, books, ingots, abacus, toys, pastries and candies, rouge and gouache, jewelry...The old man put Nuo'er in front of the "popper table" and asked him to grab the items on the table. Nuo'er fluttered curiously on the table for a while, and grabbed a small silver sword.The relatives and friends who came to watch the ceremony said pleasant things one after another, such as "the future is bright, the country will be peaceful and stable".I sat on the chair and smiled faintly, my Nuo'er, I don't expect you to have martial arts and martial arts in the future, your father and I's greatest wish is that you can live a healthy and smooth life.

The old man was very satisfied with the sword that Nuo'er caught, he carried him to the chair and sat down, and said loudly: "Today, I invite you all to watch the ceremony of grasping the week of my great-grandson Yunnuo, and I want to announce something in public. From now on, Yun Nuo is the son of the Marquis of Yongle, and after a hundred years from this Marquis, he can inherit the title of this Marquis."

As soon as I said this, everyone congratulated me, and there were many people in front of me, saying "Congratulations to Mrs. Ronghua, congratulations to Xiao Shizi".I just felt that there were many figures dangling in front of me, and I was a little dizzy.There was a wry smile on the corner of his lips. I knew the old man had this in mind, and I mentioned it to me a few times, but I shrugged it off. I didn't expect him to insist on saying this decision in front of everyone.I sighed faintly. From now on, the peaceful life between Nuoer and I might be broken.

——2007, September, 3
(End of this chapter)