Qingqingzijin, miss my heart

Chapter 19 The Sunshine Is Here, You Are Not (1)
01
Cen Nian who lost Jiang Bei was like a fish out of water, without even the strength to struggle.

Tears kept flowing out of his eyes, Cen Nian lay down on the table, letting the tears soak his sleeves.

Crying silently, even Tang Yin, who came home late, didn't notice that something was wrong with her.When she came out of the shower, she found that Cen Nian was still in the previous posture, and she ignored her when she talked to her. Tang Yin seemed to feel something, and hurriedly sat beside her.

"Cen Nian, what's the matter with you?" Tang Yin called her softly, reaching out to pat her shoulder.

Cen Nian wanted to shake her head and say it was okay, but when she moved, her body trembled uncontrollably.

Tang Yin panicked, and while pulling her to see her face, she asked anxiously: "What's wrong? Cen Nian, what's wrong with you? You answered me! Are you crying? Are you... yes Didn't Senior Jiang Bei bully you?"

The next moment, Cen Nian hugged her.

Cen Nian burst into tears as if the emotions he had borne for a long time were suddenly torn apart.

Tang Yin, who was at a loss, was stunned for a while, and then asked her repeatedly "what's the matter" while patting her on the back.

"Tang Yin..." After a long while, Cen Nian finally confessed, "I broke up with Jiang Bei."

She tried her best to laugh and say such a sad thing, but she couldn't do it. It was because she was in love that she couldn't end the relationship in a relaxed tone.

"You..." Looking at Cen Nian, Tang Yin's heart ached, her nose was sore, and she couldn't even say words of comfort.She has been busy with the broadcasting agency these few days, so she can't take care of Cen Nian at all, let alone with Jiang Bei by her side, it's not her turn to worry, but she doesn't want to...

Thinking of Jiang Bei, Tang Yin said angrily: "He dared to abandon you, I'll settle the score with him!"

Just about to get up, Cen Nian held her back.

"It's useless." Cen Nian cried and grinned lightly, but the tears kept falling, "He really doesn't love me anymore, he's even annoyed when he sees me."

"Cen Nian..."

At this moment, Tang Yin could do nothing but give her a hug.

The emotional world is very wonderful and complicated, and bystanders can only watch. Although it is said that "the authorities are obsessed, the bystanders are clear", but no matter how clear the onlooker is, she can only watch and cannot intervene.

Cen Nian's love died, so she also became a walking dead.

Tang Yin had never seen Cen Nian like this before, like a flower that decayed before its flowering period, even a gust of breeze was enough to blow it away.She felt sorry for such a Cen Nian, who had no vitality and no smile, and the only thing she could do was to accompany her, to be sad with her, to be in a daze with her, and to be insomnia with her.

Thus, Cen Nian's mood gradually changed to Tang Yin's mood.

And Tao Yuan, who was busy preparing for the postgraduate entrance examination, just had time to go to Weibo, and saw Tang Yin's latest Weibo - "He is not your sea, why do you jump down desperately", the picture on the Weibo is Cen Nian's back.

Tao Yuan suddenly felt something was wrong, and immediately went to Tang Yin's Weibo homepage to check more Weibo, most of them were full of sad content, and from time to time attached photos of Cen Nian with his back or shadow, all of which It made him feel that something happened to Cen Nian.

So, he immediately contacted Tang Yin and asked her, "What happened to Cen Nian? Did something happen?"

Tang Yin was in the dormitory when she received the call. When she heard Tao Yuan's question, she subconsciously looked at Cen Nian on the bed, then walked out of the dormitory cautiously, and then said softly, "Senior Tao, don't you know? She and Cen Nian Jiang Bei broke up, it is said that Jiang Bei and Zou Yuqing are together! Hmph! I knew that woman is not a good person!"

Hearing this, Tao Yuan immediately became angry, and he asked again: "What happened to Cen Nian?"

"Alas!" Tang Yin sighed, "Not good! The whole thing is a walking dead! I swear, if I see the bastard Jiang Bei senior, I will definitely beat him to death! Once I see him, I will beat him once!"

The Walking Dead?

Tao Yuan imagined the appearance of Cen Nian after breaking up in his mind, and his heart ached uncontrollably.

After talking on the phone with Tang Yin, his anger burned and dazzled Tao Yuan, so after Jiang Bei returned to the dormitory, Tao Yuan punched him.

He questioned Jiang Bei: "Why let Cen Nian down!"

If he had known that Jiang Bei would let Cen Nian down, he would never have chosen the beauty of an adult no matter what. Even if Cen Nian didn't love him at that time, he would have worked hard with all his might.

Facing Tao Yuan's anger, Jiang Bei just wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth lightly, without answering.

"I ask you why!" Tao Yuan stepped forward again, but his fist was restrained by reason, and finally smashed against the wall.

Jiang Bei was silent all the time, Tao Yuan couldn't see the grief in his heart, because his heart was already swayed by the emotion of loving Cen Nian.They were all enduring heart-piercing pain, and they couldn't even bother to look at each other, let alone understand.

In the end, Tao Yuan sneered and said, "Jiang Bei, I thought you could give her happiness. So, I misread you."

After saying that, he turned and left.

He didn't allow himself to live under the same roof with Jiang Bei anymore, he was afraid that he couldn't help but beat him to death, so he chose to stay out for the night.

At daybreak, after Jiang Bei went to practice, he went back to pack his things and stayed in his junior's dormitory for a while.

The next day, after Tao Yuan took care of everything, he called Tang Yin and asked her to go to the pedestrian street with Cen Nian.

Tang Yin once said that Cen Nian would only go out now to go to class, and she was refusing everything.Fortunately, Cen Nian still showed up, but 10 minutes later than the agreed time.

After not seeing her for a few days, Cen Nian lost a lot of weight. Watching her approach from a distance, Tao Yuan felt that she was like a crumpled piece of paper, blowing in the wind.

Thinking that Cen Nian's weight loss was all caused by Jiang Bei, Tao Yuan couldn't help but feel sour, and his hands subconsciously clenched into fists.

But when Cen Nian approached, Tao Yuan forced himself to show a bright smile and greeted her: "Primary school girl, long time no see, I thought you didn't want to see me anymore."

"How could it be?" Cen Nian smiled, and without any acting skills, she engraved the words "forced smile" into her expression.

"Cen Nian came out today because of Senior Tao's face." Tang Yin beside her said with an exaggerated smile, "So, if Senior Tao is free, you can make more appointments with us, and if you don't come out to bask in the sun, Cen Nian They're going to turn into mushrooms."

"No way." Cen Nian still had that expression, but his tone deliberately pretended to be relaxed.

Afterwards, the three got on the bus and headed towards the pedestrian street all the way.

After a whole day of playing, Tang Yin was still chattering, but Cen Nian was much quieter.With her distracted eyes, she can turn a blind eye to her favorite snacks on weekdays. Even when Tang Yin deliberately argues with her, she doesn't refute, but just smiles.Many times, when Tao Yuan and Tang Yin talked to her, she would only say a few words, not much, and although she kept smiling, she was not as lively as usual.

Sensing Tao Yuan's worry, Tang Yin sighed, and while Cen Nian was in the bathroom, she whispered to Tao Yuan: "Take your time, let's spend more time with her."

Tao Yuan nodded and said, "Tang Yin, please give me your daily schedule. When you are not free, I will accompany her. In any case, you can't let her think wildly."

Hearing this, Tang Yin frowned slightly: "But, aren't you going to prepare for the postgraduate entrance examination?"

Tao Yuan smiled slightly and said, "It's just for the postgraduate entrance examination, don't worry, studying also requires a combination of work and rest."

Seeing Tang Yin smiling and nodding in conviction, Tao Yuan took a sip of tea.What Tang Yin didn't know was that although he didn't have to worry about failing the exam based on his grades, the postgraduate entrance examination itself was not an easy task. It is more important than the postgraduate entrance examination, so even if he is too busy, he will definitely find time to be with her, even if it is just sitting in meditation.

It happened that Tang Yin was going to participate in the broadcasting agency's activities the next day, so she "entrusted" Cen Nian to Tao Yuan's care.

Originally, Tao Yuan called Cen Nian to ask her to go out, but she was still unwilling. It was Tao Yuan who asked the housekeeper to let him in for 2 minutes, and then pulled Cen Nian out of the girls' dormitory.However, her person came out, but her heart was still silent.No matter how Tao Yuan tried his best to tell her bad jokes and make funny faces to please her, she just couldn't laugh.Jiang Bei's departure seemed to take away her happiness.Many times, Tao Yuan almost felt that there was nothing he could do, but he couldn't worry about her, she couldn't be happy, and his smile lost warmth.

As time passed, even though Tang Yin and Tao Yuan took turns to accompany Cen Nian, she was still unhappy.

Until that night, Tang Yin, who heard Cen Nian secretly crying in the middle of the night, lost her temper, and cried and scolded her in the dormitory: "Cen Nian, you are enough! What do you want us to do to cheer you up? Isn't it just Jiang Bei , why do you make your own life worse than death! You are living in such a state of embarrassment, did Jiang Bei take a look at you! Tao Yuan and I have done so much for you, why don't you be moved, why can't you cheer us up stand up!"

She scolded excitedly, and cried louder and louder.

It was obviously Cen Nian who was crying after losing his love, but in the end Tang Yin cried harder than her because she was let down.

02
But after that night, Cen Nian seemed to have opened his eyes, and gradually recovered his cheerful personality, and gradually walked out of the decadent period of broken love.Tang Yin thought that she had awakened Cen Nian, that she was learning to let go of Jiang Bei.Little did she know, Cen Nian was just pretending, Tang Yin's scolding made her understand everything Tang Yin and Tao Yuan had done for her, but she still couldn't let go of Jiang Bei, so she could only pretend that happiness had returned.

It was already December, and winter had arrived in the city as scheduled.

Seeing Cen Nian getting better gradually, Tao Yuan calmed down and heaved a sigh of relief.The postgraduate entrance examination was gradually approaching, and soon, he also entered the sprint stage of review.

On the weekend, Tang Yin personally cooked soup for Tao Yuan.

Cen Nian in the dormitory also got a bowl of "Tang Yin Love Soup" for "compensation".Ever since Tao Yuan announced his "retreat", Tang Yin often took care of Tao Yuan, overtly or secretly. While drinking the soup, Cen Nian made fun of Tang Yin and said, "You will definitely be a good wife and mother in the future."

Tang Yin smiled proudly, and said, "It's a pity that I can only marry..." She winked at Cen Nian as she spoke, "You understand."

Cen Nian grinned dryly, making a disgusted look: "I don't want to understand."

After the two were fighting, Tang Yin said "I'm going out" and went out.

Tang Yin's departure seemed to take something away, and the whole dormitory suddenly fell into a desolate silence. It was obviously only Tang Yin, but the world seemed to be empty in an instant, so the loneliness that was gaining momentum began to spread arrogantly. invade this territory.

Cen Nian finished drinking the soup quietly, washed the dishes and chopsticks, and then did nothing.

Outside the house, the afternoon sun was shining brightly. It is rare to see such a warm sun in December, as if it could warm a sad heart.

Cen Nian, who is full of scars, also wants to bask in the sun, let this warmth live in his heart, and generate hope.So, she changed her clothes, went out, and escaped the loneliness of the bedroom.

……

When he met Jiang Bei, he was with Zou Yuqing.

They met face to face, but the former lovers just looked at each other and looked away.

Since they broke up, they occasionally ran into each other on campus. After all, Jiang Bei hadn't officially graduated yet and was still living in school.But, thinking about it, Cen Nian felt sad. Before the breakup, she deliberately avoided him, but she really couldn't find him; after the breakup, she wanted to avoid him, but when she thought of him from time to time, she looked up and met him.

Still can't feel relieved.

She understands that she will never let go of her love and obsession with Jiang Bei.

However, she won't pester her, Jiang Bei hates her pestering, but pretending not to know each other when they met, maybe that's what Jiang Bei wanted most.

Thinking about it, Cen Nian smiled bitterly.

When she glanced casually across the school gate, she saw Tang Yin.

At this time, Tang Yin was walking towards the bus station, she was going to the Apple mobile phone store in the city.Because Tao Yuan's mobile phone broke down, and there was no Apple mobile phone store near the school, Tao Yuan was busy with his studies and didn't have time, so he had to ask Tang Yin, who was going to deliver the soup, to make a trip for him.Tang Yin was very happy.

After a while, Tang Yin arrived at the Apple mobile phone store.

After checking Tao Yuan's mobile phone, the clerk said: "Miss, your mobile phone has a software failure. If you want to repair it, you need to format the phone, so that all the contents will be deleted. Check to see if there are any files. It's important, copy it first."

"Ok."

Tang Yin took out her mobile phone, ready to copy the files in Tao Yuan's mobile phone.

However, when she accidentally opened the photo album on her mobile phone, she immediately froze. The photos on the screen were all about Cen Nian—smiling Cen Nian, laughing Cen Nian, dazed Cen Nian, silly Cen Nian, eating Cen Nian, who is studying hard... Even the back view and the shadow on the ground are all from Cen Nian.

After Tang Yin was stunned, she frowned slightly.

These photos were obviously taken deliberately.

She thought of every time his eyes fell on her, and suddenly realized that every time his gentle gaze was fixed on Cen Nian, he only had Cen Nian in his eyes, and she, Tang Yin, was just careless It fell into his line of sight.

She remembered that time when Tao Yuan's performance went beyond the script, that kiss that shocked others and angered Jiang Bei.

It turned out that he was really doing a fake show.

Tang Yin's heart was sore, as if sliced ​​lemons were spread on her heart, not letting go of any corner.

This secret love, she thought it was a mutual love, so she was not in a hurry to confess, and even thought that after the postgraduate entrance examination, she would wait for Tao Yuan's confession, but she didn't think that it was just her own wishful thinking, and all the ambiguity was self-righteous romantic.

Taking a deep breath and swallowing all the sadness, Tang Yin decided to end this unrequited crush from this moment on.

03
When it comes to love, Tang Yin is obviously much more relaxed than Cen Nian.

Although she still feels secretly sad from time to time, when she was with Tao Yuan, she was still the same Tang Yin from before, she just silently warned herself repeatedly when her heart moved.

She never forces it, whether it is herself or others, but it takes a process from liking to letting go, which may be short or long.

The final exam is coming soon.

After three consecutive days of exams, this semester has officially ended, and the winter vacation has officially begun.Fortunately, Tao Yuan was wise enough to book the train tickets a month ago, so the three of them were able to return to Nanshan City smoothly during the Spring Festival travel season.

On the day when he left school, Cen Nian, who was full of hope, did not see Jiang Bei.

It seems that it is always like this between them after breaking up. When they don't want to see each other, they meet face to face, but when they want to see each other, they can't even find a similar figure from the back.

After breaking up for such a long time, she missed him all the time, but she kept her mouth shut.

She had counted the number of times she would see Jiang Bei in the next semester, but the result made her feel very sad.

What she never expected was that she would meet Jiang Bei on the eve of the Spring Festival.

On this day, Cen Nian went to the cemetery with her mother to pay homage to her father. When she gradually approached his father's tombstone, she saw Jiang Bei's figure.

Like a dream.

Cen Nian thought she was hallucinating, so she rubbed her eyes quickly, but when she looked again, she was sure that this was not a hallucination, nor a dream, and Jiang Bei was really standing in front of her father's tombstone.

Why is he here?
With doubts, Cen Nian approached with his mother.

The distance gradually shortened before Cen Nian could hear Jiang Bei's voice——

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I didn't expect things to turn out like that..."

A huge question mark appeared in Cen Nian's heart. She couldn't think of the reason for his appearance, let alone understand his confession words, so she frowned and asked directly: "Do you know... my father?"

Apparently he didn't expect to run into Cen Nian, Jiang Bei was stunned.

His mind went blank for a moment, but his heart was raised in the air, feeling uneasy.

As if realizing something, Cen Nian stepped forward and asked again: "Jiang Bei, why are you here? Why do you want to confess to my father?"

"I'm sorry." Jiang Bei took a deep breath, and the first words he opened his lips were full of apology. He said, "I killed your father."

"What! You said, it was you who killed my father?"

My heart skipped a beat, and then it hurt like a tugging pain.

Cen Nian felt as if the air had been sucked out suddenly by someone, and she was a little dizzy, and her breathing became short of breath.

(End of this chapter)